I sat next to Tobias as he waited for his name to be called. Jeanine Matthews - the faction leader of Erudite - was the one calling the 16-year-old's to the stage after giving the choosing ceremony speech. I tuned it out knowing this would be the last time in two years that I would see my big brother.
I knew he would pick to transfer from our faction just after our first beating since mama died. I was dreading being alone with Marcus, but I was sure I could handle another two years before leaving myself and following my brother.
I held his hand tightly, knowing he left the blue sculpture Mama gave him on his dresser. This too told me he was transferring factions. I thought back to earlier that day as I squeezed his hand harder.
"Tobias, you know what to choose," Marcus said looking sternly to him. I had stopped calling him Papa the night after mama died, I just didn't care anymore. He nodded and went back to eating his plain oatmeal.
He was referring to staying in Abnegation. He wanted Tobias to stay in Abnegation, here with him. It was not an option, he needed to leave and I was going to be the one to convince him to free himself.
Marcus left the room, "Don't listen to him, choose wherever you want to go." I saw him flick his eyes to me. Before he could even open his mouth to protest I continued, "Remember our pact? I will follow you whatever faction you decide to choose. Don't worry about me, I can handle him for two years alone. He can't kill me without it becoming suspicious."
I got up from my chair and ran to my room quickly pulling the necklace that mama gave me out of my drawer and running down the stairs again.
The necklace was a tiny heart-shaped locket with a picture of me and Tobi smiling the day before mama died. I was standing on my tippy-toes and wrapping my arms around his neck in a hug. We both had big smiles on our face for the last time I place it in his hand and urge him...
"Eaton, Tobias." She calls in a dry voice waking me from my daydream. "Don't forget me, Tobi," I say sadly. He gives my hand one last squeeze and makes his way towards the bowls.
Water for Erudite. Grey stones for Abnegation. Glass for Candor. Burning coals for Dauntless. Soil for Amity. All stained by the blood of people going before him. Soon his blood, my blood, will join one.
He is handed a knife by an Abnegation man. He uses it to make a small cut in the palm of his dominant hand. Looking between the bowls, I see he is trying to make his mind up with where he wants to go. I pray that he doesn't stay. I pray that he leaves.
He deserves to be free and have a happy life.
He doesn't look towards me once as he tries to make up his decision. I know it would only make it harder for him to leave if he did.
For a second, it looks like he was going to choose Abnegation before he hesitated and moved his hand. His blood drops into the sizzling coals of Dauntless. I listen as they go wild and I feel nothing but proud for my brother. "Dauntless," Jeanine says and he walks towards his new faction. Relief floods through my chest for my brother. I guess I was heading to Dauntless.
The ceremony ends and the Dauntless stand to leave. Across the room, I shout "Remember me, Tobi!" I get strange looks from everyone in the room. It doesn't stop me from my none-Abnegation outburst. He nods his head in my direction with a grave and sad look on his face. He knows what I know.
It will only get worse for me.
Moving the chairs one by one, I dread the moment I will have to go home with Marcus, there is no chance of me getting out of this unscathed. Not after my outburst anyways and the implication that I will be following him.
***
The door slams shut behind him and I try to make a run for it. It helps me none as Marcus grabs my arm and slams me to the ground with the force of the yank. I grip my hand in my teeth so I don't make a sound.
"You knew!" He shrieked at me and brought the belt down onto my clothed back. It left a welt, I could feel it. There was no point in lying, he always saw right through it, "I told him to leave." I whimper as the belt came down again, the buckle catching through my clothes and into my skin before ripping it away tearing my flesh up with it.
He got down next to me pulling at a fist full of fabric and violently forced me to my feet. "Oh my sweet girl, you are going to regret that you made him leave." His voice was sickeningly sweet and my stomach dropped knowing I was in for something much worse than the normal beatings.
He pulled me to my feet and lead me to the kitchen. I was punched in the face so hard I fell to the ground again. I watched as he reached for a knife on the counter.
I was shuffling away when he turned and saw me. Grabbing my ankle Marcus yanked causing me to bang my nose right of the plain grey floors. I was terrified that he was going to kill me. "Please just do it! Get it over with and kill me like you did to mama!" I begged. I gasped at my own words, never had I actually given voice to my opinion before.
Enraged at the mention of my mama he lunges forward and lands on top of my already sore body. He began to lift my clothing to have easier access to my skin.
Groaning as I felt the sting of the knife before Marcus's cackles can even make their ways to my ears. He craves away at my body starting from my belly button and working its way to the left.
It stops abruptly before he shifts my position to spank my butt. I was confused about what it meant because he has never done that before. He continues his work.
The knife slipped in his grip causing it to rip into my back into some fresh scars I received. As if nothing happened he turned to continue the knife in its directed path up to my armpit shrugging off the extra damage he inflicted on my weakening body.
Warning: Rape. Please, I urge you to skip if you are not comfortable.
Then a crooked smile crossed his face and he knelt down to press his lips on my neck. I tried to squirm but the pain from the knife kept me from moving fully. "Now that you mentioned your mother, I am feeling very aroused and would like you to help me." He sneered at me before pulling his and my clothing off.
I squeezed my eyes closed as I felt the pain of him entering me. He leaned forward kissing my neck and biting the area leaving a mark. He lifted my body pressing himself deeper into me as he began to suck my growing breasts. "Daddy, please don't! Please stop, I'm sorry!"
He ran his fingers across my body as he pounded in and out of me. I cried out for him to stop, but he wouldn't, he was too deep into his pleasure to even care. "Daddy please stop!"
He came, his body relaxed and he collapsed on top of me.
Finally, he was done and left to get himself cleaned up after getting my blood all over his body. I lay in a pool of my own blood waiting for death to take me away from him.
Rape done
***
I wake up with a groan and try to move my hand to cover my eyes because of the intense light.
I looked around hoping for some indicator as to the place I was and noticed the white plain walls and smell of antiseptic. It was a hospital. He actually hospitalized me. Letting out a sharp laugh at the fact that he had to take me to the hospital because of how bad he hurt me. I coughed when the pain took it over the left side of my stomach.
My father had beat me bad enough to put me in the hospital, that was a first. I knew it would only get worse and I was prepared to take it.
A kind looking nurse in blue walks in with a smile resting on her thin lips. "Miss Eaton, it's good to have you awake," she says as she comes close to check my files and write them on the chart. "You have been unconscious for two weeks." I missed visiting day. I missed my only chance to see Tobias.
"Wh-what happened?" I knew what happened, I just needed to hear Marcus's excuse. "A factionless man attacked and assaulted you when you didn't give him an extra rations basket." I nodded acting as though I remembered the painful memory and tried to turn away to hide my anger for my father.
So that is what Marcus said. I guess that it was what I would have to stick with and concoct a background story for it. I was always a very good liar, though I tended to lean more towards telling the truth. I was not meant for Candor.
"I don't suggest you trying to move right now sweetheart, moving will only make everything worse." I pause and look at the woman with concern in her face. I try to hold it in, but my quivering lip gives it away. It has been so long since an adult cared about me aside from the Prior family.
She moves forward and puts a comforting hand on my shoulder, "I can understand that this is all hard for you. You are brave, you will get through this. As tough as a Dauntless." I nod slowly if only she knew the real reason I was here.
Marcus enters the room when the doctor alerts him to my awakening, I give him a scared look before slipping into my fake, public role. "Papa, it was so scary," I faked a sob and covered my face to hide the tears I couldn't shed.
A hand is placed on my shoulder and I begin to tell him how terrified I was about the factionless man attacking me as the doctor finished her examination of my body. Marcus looks at me coldly once everyone is gone. "So I guess you know what you have to say should someone ask then sweet girl?" I hated that nickname, but I nodded to please him. "Good, when we get home, you can clean the mess you made and make me dinner. You get discharged in a week."
I nod knowing I had a week before the beatings started again.
I am pretty sure death would be much better. Man 2 years was going to take a long time to come.