The next morning, I woke up to a blinding sunlight, and I rolled over and snuggled deeper into the comforters, allowing the warm smell of fabric softener to invade my nostrils. A cocoon of warmth and comfort settled over me like a warm halo, and I smiled to myself.
Slowly, I peeled open my eyes, and met Chance’s. I let out a squeak of surprise and almost fell out of the bed, but managed to grab onto the sheets and hold on just in time to avoid embarrassment.
Chance chuckled, his eyebrows raised. “Hi, there.”
“Were you watching me sleep?” I muttered, suddenly self-conscious. Ever since I’d started sleeping in the same room as Chance, I’d taken to wearing a bra to bed—which was just as uncomfortable as it sounded—but I suddenly felt exposed. What if I’d snored in my sleep?
He grinned. “No, of course not,” he replied quickly, shaking his head adamantly. “You just… said my name in your sleep,” he admitted finally. “And then you woke up.”
“Oh,” I whispered, as the memories of last night flooded back to me. Talking about my parents and Zoëy on the dock, and then giving up my first kiss to Chance.
After we’d said merry Christmas to each other, Chance had kissed me again, and that had continued well past midnight. I hadn’t told Chance that I loved him back—mostly because I wasn’t entirely sure that I did yet—and Chance hadn’t asked me to. He’d been happy to let it go, respecting the fact that just because we’d shared that moment last night, didn’t mean everything had changed. I was still the same girl.
But it seemed I was powerless to his kisses.
It was then I suddenly realized what he was wearing. He wore a pair of plaid pajama pants, and… well, nothing else.
His handsome torso was left bare, and let me tell you, that was a sight to see. I’d seen him shirtless before—whenever we’d gone swimming in the lake he’d gone topless—but in the light of morning it was… well, perfect, honestly.
He had washboard abs, a muscular chest and broad shoulders, and those V lines girls seemed to obsess over so much. Not to mention how naturally tanned he was. It was as if he had been roasted on God’s very own heavenly rotisserie.
And I was not complaining.
Finally, I cleared my throat and turned away, lying back down slowly. “What time is it?”
“Just after eight,” Chance replied, tugging a white shirt on. I had half a mind to tell him to leave the shirt off, but decided against it. If he did, I wasn’t to be held accountable for my actions.
Chance walked over and sat on the edge of my bed, grabbing my hand and interlocking our fingers. “About last night…” he began. His lashes were so long that they brushed his cheekbones when he blinked, and his Adam’s apple bobbed nervously as he swallowed. “…I meant what I said. And I still mean it now.”
I looked down. “Chance, I…”
I raised my eyes and stared into his. His hazel ones were looking into mine earnestly, and his expression was hopeful and vulnerable. I hated to be the one to shatter the moment.
I shook my head and used my free hand to push my hair behind my ears. “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “But I just… I can’t right now. My parents are getting back together and I kind of have some stuff to deal with right now. I’m sorry.”
He looked down, and his plump lips twisted into a grimace. He dropped my hand dejectedly and cleared his throat. I looked down and picked at a loose thread on the down comforter, wishing my answer could be something different.
But the truth was, I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be ready to embark on a relationship with Chance—or anybody, for that matter. I still wasn’t at a place in my life right now where I was ready for a relationship, and the fact that I’d given up my first kiss last night had been major progress, anyway. I just didn’t think something like that was possible for a girl like me.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
He looked up and forced a smile, though I could tell it was fake. “It’s okay,” he replied. “I knew it was a slim chance when I took it. But it was worth a try.” He stood up, and I followed suit, tugging down my short shorts and standing with my arms crossed over my chest.
I pushed my blonde hair behind my ears and turned back around to face my bed, and hurriedly attempted to make it. Just as I spun around, I noticed Chance was right behind me. I gasped at the sudden close proximity.
“Chance, what are you—?”
But I never got the chance to finish that sentence, because suddenly, his warm lips were pressed against mine. His arm snaked around my waist and pulled me to his muscular body, and the backs of my knees collided with the bed, causing me to fall back. I let out a surprised squeak as I hit the bed, and burst into a fit of giggles.
Chance pulled back with a grin. “Sorry. But I have been dying to do that all morning.”
He leaned back down and pressed his lips to mine. My hands threaded into his hair, pulling him closer, and his cupped my waist. My head spun dizzyingly as his lips explored mine, but finally pulled back when his thumb accidentally hit a bit of my bare skin, jolting me back.
I pulled back and smiled softly. “We should really go downstairs and say Merry Christmas to everybody,” I whispered.
He groaned and immediately lifted himself off me. I felt cold without his body heat against mine, but ignored that feeling. I stood up to find Chance grinning by the window, shaking his head softly.
“What?” I asked, blinking in surprise at him.
He looked back at me and grinned. “I’ve never met a girl like you before, you know that?”
“What do you mean?” I asked, smiling back at his infectious grin.
“Nothing,” he replied, shaking his head softly and walking to the door. He opened it and grabbed my hand, tugging me out. “Come on, Candi. Let’s go see the family, then.”
~ * ~
“So, Candice, where’d you and Chance disappear to last night?” Ava asked, appearing beside me an hour later as I helped wash up the breakfast dishes. I stood by the basin, my hands submerged in lavender-scented water as I rinsed off the plates, and Ava stood close by with a dishtowel, obviously eager to get the latest gossip.
I shrugged. “We just went down by the lake for a little while. No biggie.”
She wiggled her arched eyebrows. “Color me intrigued. What happened?”
I shrugged and handed her an egg flip to dry, before grabbing a colander. “Nothing happened. We talked about things. The phone call I got last night was from my mom. My parents are getting back together.”
Ava was so shocked that she looked ready to collapse to the floor in surprise. “Wait, seriously? I thought they hated each other!”
I nodded grimly. “Me, too. But apparently not. They’re going to give it a second chance, or something. Guess my mom is Dad’s new flavor of the week.”
“Wow,” Ava said, putting a silver fork back into the cutlery drawer.
“Yeah,” I replied. “So Chance and I just talked about that for a while. And then…”
Ava’s green eyes lit up, and she jiggled up and down in excitement. “Then?”
I stopped and stared down at the soapy water, considering my next words carefully. “Did you know about… Zoëy?”
Ava looked down, biting her glossed lip gently. She busied herself drying up a metal cheese grater. “Chance told you about her, huh?”
“You knew?” I gasped out, surprised. I didn’t know why it came as a shock, but something about the fact Ava and Zoëy knew each other threw me off-guard.
She nodded and flicked a loose lock of her long dark hair back. “Yeah. I’ve known Chance since I was thirteen. Zoëy and I were actually friends. They started dating a year after I met Chance.” She shrugged. “They were totally in love. She came to my sweet sixteenth, and everything.”
“What was she… like?”
“She was a lot like you, actually,” Ava mused, pursing her bright red lips as she thought about this mysterious Zoëy Carter.
“But we’re completely different,” I replied, frowning. “For instance, I have blonde hair, and apparently Zoëy was this stunning Italian girl.”
Ava giggled. “Not in appearances, Candi. You guys are just… the same in your personalities. I guess Chance has a type. Independent, sweet girls. She was exactly like you. Some of the things you say… sometimes it’s kinda like speaking to Zoëy herself. It’s… freaky.”
“I can’t imagine what Chance went through,” I admitted, letting the water out of the basin and drying my hands on another chicken-printed dishtowel.
Ava ran a hand through her hair. “It was pretty bad. Once she died, Chance fell into a major depression. He wouldn’t speak to anyone. Not his parents or Jamie… no one. He shut himself off from the world. It was awful watching him suffer like that. But he’s totally different now. Finally he’s starting to move on with his life. It’s good.”
I smiled and leaned against the basin, playing with my nails, which had been painted a ‘Passion Pop Red’, according to the expensive glass bottle.
“So, what happened after that?” Ava pressed, curious for all details. “You guys were out there till, like, one in the morning.”
I looked down and shrugged, skimming my toe gently against the linoleum ground. “Just… stuff.”
Her eyes widened. “Did you guys… you know…?”
My eyes widened, and I smacked her with the dishtowel, letting out a surprised bark of laughter. “What? No! Of course not! What kind of girl do you take me for, Ava?”
“Shh!” she said, giggling. “Did you kiss?”
I shrugged and looked down, feeling a blush coming on. Ava’s jaw dropped, and she let out a low squeal, jumping up and down. “Oh my God, that’s amazing, Candi! How was it? Magical? Amazing? Is he a good kisser?”
“Phenomenal,” I admitted with a chuckle. I used to watch people talk about things like this back when I was in high school, but I never thought I’d be the kind of girl to talk excitedly about her kissing experiences. Some people really do change after high school, I guess.
“Wait a second….” Ava said, surveying me as she walked closer. She walked around me, tapping her bottom lip gently as she gauged my appearance. “Your lips are bright red and swollen. Did you… did you guys kiss this morning?”
I shrugged. “It was only one tiny peck. I swear.”
“So, are you… together, then?” she asked curiously, leaning her hip against the counter and staring at me.
I shook my head and tied my wavy hair into a messy bun. “No way. We’re definitely not at that stage yet. Maybe we never will be. This doesn’t change anything.”
“I beg to differ,” Ava replied. “You gave up your first kiss last night, Candi. That’s huge!”
“Still,” I replied. “I’m not looking for a relationship right now. And I may never be. I don’t know yet.”
“How does Chance feel about that?” she asked.
I sighed. “I don’t know. He respects the fact that I’m not looking for a relationship yet, but I think he’s still a little disappointed. I hate doing this to him. I feel like I’m leading him on, or something. And I don’t wanna do that to him. He’s an amazing guy. I just wish I could give him what he wants.”
She smiled gently. “Chance is a great guy. I’m sure he understands why you can’t. But, you know, maybe when you’re finished dealing with your troubles… you could give him a chance?”
“Maybe,” I mused. Lately I had been seriously considering revoking my whole ‘no-dating’ rule. I just felt like I could try giving something of myself to Chance. Even if I was still a skeptic when it came to love, I didn’t see why I shouldn’t at least try. I owed Chance and myself that much, didn’t I?
“Present time!” Julie cried enthusiastically as she popped her head through the kitchen’s glass French doors. Then she disappeared again, leaving a pungent cloud of perfume behind.
Ava grinned and jiggled excitedly. “Come on. Let’s go.”
She dropped the dishtowel on the island bench unceremoniously and started for the doors. “Wait, Ava!” I called, playing with the topaz ring on my left index finger.
She spun around, blotting her hands on her white jeans. She looked especially pretty today, her hair stylishly curled so that it fell to the small of her back in artfully messy waves. She wore an aqua shirt with lacy frills around the neckline—definitely not her usual attire—and a pair of clean white jeans, as well as a pair of silver ballet flats. She had on a small dash of lip gloss and a slick of mascara, and white shell earrings dangled from her ears. A bunch of silver bracelets jingled on her wrists. “Yeah?”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, tapping my fingers gently on the bench top.
She frowned and took a step closer. “For what?”
“For Zoëy,” I admitted slowly, feeling like I owed it to her to get this out. “I mean, when she died, you lost her as well. I know she was a friend of yours. So I’m sorry you lost her like that.”
She stepped forward, and her lips quivered slightly as her bright green eyes filled with tears. She threw her slim, tanned arms around my neck and hugged me close. “Thank you,” she breathed out, her voice low and thick. Then she stepped back and gave me a watery but encouraging smile. “But I’ve got you now, don’t I?”
“Yeah.” I smiled and took her hand, leading her out into the living room, where everyone was gathering around the lit Christmas tree and passing out presents. Last night, I’d put mine out for everyone as well under the thick green bushes of the tree. Thankfully, Giuseppe’s paid well, and I’d been able to buy everyone coming a gift. We’d also gone into town three days ago for final supplies, and I’d been able to purchase gifts for Lauren, Matthew and Chance as well.
Surprisingly, I actually got gifts from a lot of people. Julie and Mikael got me a massive cookbook full of delicious recipes I was excited to try, Grandpa D and Grandma D got me a few spools of wool and a knitting book, and Payton, Max, Janie and Rick pooled together to get me a facial and manicure kit. Ava got me an embarrassing set of lacy lingerie that made my cheeks burn with shame when I accidentally opened the pink box in front of her parents, and Jamie pooled in and bought me something that I would probably have no use for—if you get my gist. To give you a hint, let’s just say they glowed in the dark.
Luckily, I managed to hide Jamie’s gift before anybody saw, and swatted him on the arm with a bit of tissue paper lying on the floor. “Jamie!” I said. “What the hell?”
He grinned and shrugged good-naturedly. Considering I’d only gotten him a can of deodorant and a few boxers—clichéd, I know—this was actually really surprising and embarrassing.
Once the wrapping paper had been cleaned up and everyone had received their gifts, we made our way into the dining-room for dinner. “Hey, Candice, can you stay back for a second, please?” Chance asked, waiting nervously by the Christmas tree.
Ava waggled her eyebrows suggestively, and I turned to Chance once everyone had disappeared through the double doors and towards the large mahogany dining setting. “Yeah?”
“This might be weird,” Chance began. “But I got you something.”
Chance pulled out something from behind his back, and I walked towards him to see a sapphire-blue velvet box in his hands. “What’s this?” I whispered, glancing between him and the box.
He shrugged. “Just a little something.” He pecked me on the cheek lightly and handed me the box. “Merry Christmas, Candi.”
I opened it slowly, and gasped at what was inside. There lay a silver necklace, with an emerald gemstone hanging off of the end of it. My breath caught in my throat, and I stared up at him. “Chance, it’s beautiful.”
He smiled. “Just like you.”
“I…” I could hardly form words, and my throat was closing up at the sight of the beautiful necklace. He took it out of the box and gestured for me to spin around. He slowly clasped the necklace around my neck, and it nestled perfectly on my collarbone. I grabbed the pendant slowly, and ran my thumb over the cool ridges on the stone. I spun around. “I love it. Thank you.”
He grinned. “You’re welcome.”
“Oh!” I said, suddenly remembering. “I have something for you, too! It’s up in the room.” I grabbed his hand and dragged him up the stairs and into our shared room, before walking to my suitcase.
I pulled out my present for him, and handed him the blue bag. He slowly opened and pulled out his present, which was a tawny braided bracelet. Hanging off the edge of it was a chakra charm. “I found it in town the other day at a mystical sage store,” I said, helping him to fasten it to his wrist with the fancy clasp. “The lady told me it was a talisman used to ward off evil and bring good luck. I figured now no matter where you go, you could know that only good things can happen.”
He smiled. “Thank you,” he said, his voice unusually thick. His hazel eyes burned with surprise, gratitude and something else I couldn’t decipher.
Then he reached down and kissed me. His arms wrapped around my waist, and mine involuntarily twined around his neck, bringing us closer. We stumbled back and fell against the door, and even though the door handle pressed uncomfortably into my back, I found it increasingly harder to care about that fact.
His lips moved from mine and peppered kisses down my jawbone and to my neck, leaving me breathless. His fingers softly traced my waist and ran through my hair. A week ago I would’ve told anyone they were crazy for thinking I’d ever be doing this right now, but I was slowly learning that anything could happen with the right person.
“We should stop,” I whispered, struggling to form a coherent thought. “People are waiting for us.”
“Let them wait,” Chance murmured, his lips never leaving my neck.
I pushed him back with a giggle. “Seriously. You are making it very hard to hold out,” I told him. “We should go.”
He grinned and nodded. “All right. Let’s go.”
He took my hand and led me down the stairs and back into the dining table. I felt like all eyes were on us as we took seats opposite each other. Chance was wedged between Julie and Jamie, and I sat between Payton and Ava.
Ava choked back laughter and stabbed a bit of turkey and gravy. In front of her stood a tall, clear glass of ginger ale, and she took a sip, smirking into the cleansing liquid.
“What?” I whispered, self-consciously toying with the necklace at my neck. Was that what everyone was looking at?
Looking over at Jamie, I saw him looking extremely uncomfortable as he fiddled with his iced water. He was scratching the back of his head and averting his eyes. Julie and Lauren were smirking at each other, and I felt like I was the brunt of some cosmic joke I wasn’t even in on.
I took a spoonful of peas and mashed potatoes, and ignored everyone. Eventually a conversation was struck up, and I was left alone, even though Ava kept smirking into her lunch.
I leaned over and stared at her. “What is going on? Why is everyone laughing?”
She shook her head and took a sip of her soda. “Nothing,” she sing-songed, studiously averting her large green eyes.
I sighed and continued on eating. Once everyone had polished off their Christmas lunches and everything had been cleared from the table, I excused myself to the bathroom and climbed the stairs gingerly, my hand circling the mahogany banister that led to the second storey. Did I have spinach stuck in my teeth, or something? Why had everyone been staring and laughing?
When I finally reached the bathroom, I made my way to the mirror and stared at myself. My jaw dropped, and I let out an involuntary squeak as I realized what everyone had been staring at the dinner table. It was enough to make me want to go crawl into a hole and die of embarrassment.
My hair was a mess, thick curls framing my face haphazardly, sticking up like a bird’s nest. The bright pink lip-gloss I had meticulously applied earlier in the morning was smudged, and the pretty silken shirt I had put on this morning was dangerously askew. My cheeks had bright splotches of red on them, and my eyes were feverishly wild. And there, on my neck, glaringly obvious for anyone wanting to see…
Was a big, giant hickey.