It was a warm summer night, the full moon shining faintly on the starry sky, giving off a peaceful vibe, but the king of Camelot didn't seem to be able to fall asleep. He was lying awake in his bed, staring at the celling, a certain raven haired boy on his mind, as he was recalling the events that took place that very morning.
"Gaius! What the hell is Merlin doing again?" Arthur yelled as soon as he barged through the door, not even bothering to knock.
Gaius gave him a quizzical look before speaking with a trace of worry in his voice:
"He didn't come home last night! I thought he was with you, sire!"
Arthur fell silent for a few seconds, truly pondering the old man's words before looking back up at the physician with a pissed expression.
"He's in the tavern again, isn't he?"
"No, sire!" Gaius answered on a sincere tone, concern now being written all over his face.
But Arthur paid no mind to that and just stormed out of the room, mumbling something about Merlin spending too much time with the drunk of the kingdom, Gwaine.
Despite being so oblivious at the old man's worries in the morning, Arthur wasn't so fast to reach a conclusion now as, looking back, he was sure no one could fake the worry reflected into Gaius' eyes.
The king clicked his tongue in frustration and rolled on his side.
"Merlin's strong", he told himself. "He can always defend himself with magic, if anything!" And after a few more seconds: "Yes! I'm sure he's alright!"
And with that, he closed his eyes, satisfied with the conclusion he had reached, but not even 3 minutes had passed before he angrily threw his blanket to the side and stood up.
"That idiot!" he mumbled while throwing a shirt on. "Making me worry and stuff!"
He quickly went out the door, not bothering to answer the guards who were shouting his name and rushed off to the tavern.
Right after he took the last turn to reach the tavern, he could hear laughter and happy shouts from inside. A smile crept on his face when imagining he would open the door and see his stupid servant at one of the tables with a tankard of mead in his hand, safe and sound. He entered the place with that thought imprinted in his head and he quickly scanned the room for a mop of black hair and a pair of breathtakingly blue eyes. A frown replaced the smile on his face as soon as he realized the boy was nowhere to be found.
He went out, a confused and slightly worried look on his face.
"He must have returned to the castle", he thought, trying to bury the bad feeling in his gut.
He was just about to turn and leave when a figure at the end of the long street caught his attention. Judging by the way they walked with difficulty, torso leaned forward almost in pain, he could have easily said it was an old person he was dealing with. He started walking towards them, intending to help in any way he could. The person clearly did not see nor hear him coming. As he was getting closer and closer he could hear pained, laboured breaths which led him to believe they were hurt, so he sped up the pace. As the figure came to view, Arthur's heart started hammering in his chest, recognizing the form of the lanky boy that usually sprinted around the castle.
"Merlin", Arthur tried to speak his friend's name but it only came out as a whisper. He somehow urged his feet to move forward and ran towards the boy who had only now noticed him.
"Merlin!" This time, it was a shout from the bottom of his lungs when he stretched out his hands to catch the collapsing boy.
The blonde man gasped at the sight of his friend's state. He had bite marks on his neck, no doubt from a snake, a long, deep cut along his chest, numerous bruises covering his arms and a small bleeding from his head.
"Merlin, what happened? Who did this to you? Where have you been?" Arthur asked in a rush, worry and desperation washing over him.
Merlin only managed to flash him a weak smile before passing out in his arms. Arthur didn't waste another second and stood up, dashing towards the castle, Gaius's chambers, to be exact.
"Gaius!" he shouted as soon as he kicked open the door, startling the old man out of his sleep.
"Oh my boy!" Gaius hurried to their side and placed Merlin on the bed to examine him,but it just didn't get past Arthur that the old man showed no sign of shock,like he was used to seeing his ward in that state.
***
Arthur was sitting on a chair next to his friend's bed, desperately clutching his limp hand. He had now bandages covering his chest and head and a weird looking paste covering his bruises and the snake bites on his neck.
"There's no need to worry, sire!" Gaius spoke from somewhere behind him, but Arthur did not care to look away. "Knowing Merlin, he will be back on his feet by morning."
There was a moment of silence before Arthur spoke, voice shaky:
"What do you mean by knowing Merlin?" But Gaius didn't answer. That's when Arthur finally turned around. "This has happened before, hasn't it?"
The old physician could only look at his feet, not able to deny nor to confirm the king's dark thoughts.
"And I had no idea of it!" the man turned around to look at his servant once more. "He was never in the tavern, was he?"
Silence.
"Every damned time I made fun of him or scolded him for spending so much time in the tavern, he was really hiding his wounds, brushing away his pain and enduring. And I had no idea of it!" Arthur now sounded like he was on the verge of breaking. "Why does he do this? Why didn't you ever tell me?" he looked back up at Gaius with teary eyes.
"He didn't want me to, sire."
"Why not? Does he not trust me enough? I could have helped him!" Arthur said with a trace of anger in his voice. "I could have helped him", he repeated, but this time it came out as a broken whisper.
"He didn't want to endanger you, sire. The battles he's fighting are not things that can be solved with a sword. He just wanted to protect you!"
"It's Morgana, isn't it? She's doing this to him!"
But Gaius fell silent again. Silence was an answer too.
"And he's fighting all alone just to protect me, to protect Camelot, like he always did."
Gaius could not bring himself to say anything, nor to leave, so he just stood there.
A long time passed before any could say anything. Arthur was quietly sobbing with his face buried in Merlin's pillow, maybe a little to close to the boy. But he wouldn't be able to step away. Gaius stood across from Arthur on another chair he had pulled up.
A long time passed like that, with Gaius' slow breathing and the king's sorrowful sobs filling the silence. When he finally managed to calm down, just a little bit, the blonde man whose usually bright blue eyes were now red and filled with pain and regret, finally spoke again, voice barely above a whisper:
"Do you want to know why I never gave him days off?"
Gaius continued to stay in silence, thing that Arthur took as an invitation to continue.
"I had... always thought that when he really needs a break he would just fuck off to the tavern without so much as a warning. Even if I don't show it, I have always appreciated Merlin and understood that he needed free time, a life outside of mine." He gulped down the new tears threatening to fall. "That's why I never went down there to get him. I was bitchy about it but I always let him be, being secretly happy whenever he came back."
Silence again. Both Arthur and Gaius felt like going mad because of the many times silence had fallen upon them.
"I just... I just thought that he never really asked for permission for free time when he really wanted it. But he never had any of that! He always spent his everyday from the very waking moment for me!"
Bitter tears were now falling again on Arthur's cheeks. He was yet again sobbing over his friend's limp body, stubbornly holding on to his hand.
"He's been going through all this alone just to protect me and I wasn't there for him", he managed to say between sobs. "It's my fault!"
What was happening to him? It's been so long since he last cried and yet here he was, pouring tears all over his manservant's chest as he had his head layed on the boy's shoulder.
He suddenly felt a a hand weakly caress his hair and he shot his head up just to meet with a pair of blue eyes and a gentle, yet sad smile.
"Don't blame yourself, Arthur! It was my choice!" Merlin talked, his voice hoarse and his throat dry.
Arthur just stared in his eyes, the joy to see him awake being buried by the guilt he felt.
"How could I not when this", he said while gesturing to all of Merlin. "has happened so many times before!" There just seemed to be no stopping Arthur's tears.
"It's a small price to pay for your safety", the raven haired boy stated with conviction, his hand now on Arthur's cheek, wiping away the tears, not even realising what he was doing and completely forgetting that, any other day, Arthur would have him thrown in the dungeons for such an act. Or so he though, because little did he know, Arthur craved that warm touch more than anything.
"You idiot!" Arthur said with a small smile on his lips while placing a hand over Merlin's as if he wanted to make sure it remained on his cheek. "Your well being is not a price to pay for anything in this world, so you'll just have to deal with me not leaving your side from now on!" At this point, there was a blush creeping on Arthur's cheeks. "Try to get it into your thick skull that I want to protect you as well!"
Merlin flashed a wide, truly happy smile before nodding.
"And you can have your free day, if you want!" Arthur continued, looking away, embarrassed.
"Nah", Merlin smiled. "I'd probably get bored without having to look after you lazy ass!"
Arthur looked into the boy's eyes again, feeling a little bit bad for being so happy that Merlin wouldn't take his day off. He was an egoistic prat, he knew, but he couldn't care less as long as Merlin stayed by his side.
"Where's Gaius?" Merlin suddenly asked, looking around. The two were so caught up in each other that they didn't even see the old man leave, wishing to give them some time alone.
"He must have left", Arthur looked confused. "Well, I should be going as well, let you rest", he then said, reluctant to let go of the boy's hand. He most certainly didn't want to leave. And yet, he stood up and was ready to go, before a hand grabbed at his wrist. He looked back down at Merlin who wouldn't meet his eyes, a blush painting his pale cheeks.
"D-don't go!" Merlin whispered.
Arthur didn't need to be told twice and he happily stood back down on the chair beside Merlin's bedside, but the boy's voice was heard again, even more shy and uncertain:
"Your back will ache in the morning if you sleep there", he said, his cheeks growing even redder. "There's enough space on the bed!" he then continued while scooting over the opposite side of the bed, looking at his king expectantly. Again, Arthur didn't think for a second before doing as he had been told and climbing in the bed that was clearly too small for the both of them, thing that led the blonde man to wrap his arms around the boy. Merlin just snuggled to the man's chest, a satisfied smile on his face, thing that made Arthur's heart beat faster, as if it weren't close to jumping out of his chest already.
His whole body shivered and his heart felt like stopping when he felt Merlin place a small, tender kiss on his neck, thing that led him to tighten the grip on the boy.
"Goodnight, Merlin!"
"'Night!"
When Gaius came back, he could not contain his smile at the sight of the two curled around each other on the small bed, big smiles on their faces and in a deep, restful sleep.