Tomorrow they leave again, sad I know. Jonah did come out of his room the next day and I spend every minute I could with them before they leave for Europe again. I've slept in Zach's bed with him since he got back because I missed him a lot. Gray tried to get me not to but he can't do sh*t. Dani also talked to the guys about why I couldn't come and they are going to try let me come to a few of the Europe ones. I do plan to do a little travelling while they are away anyway. I want to go see Christina, visit my family and Gray and E want to take me to visit their home town to see their family. I'm honestly excited to travel around now school is just about down. I'm just not excited about the guys leaving again.
I wake up, feeling squashed. I slowly open my eyes, realising it's not just Zach and I in bed. I also realise everyone else is awake.
"Ah, she has woken" I hear Corbyn say from somewhere near me. Everyone was in the bed with us.
"Yes, and i'm going to kill everyone if I don't get any space soon" I threaten. I instantly hear a big bang from next to me.
"Really Jack" I hear Jonah say from the floor.
"Yes, I don't want to be killed" Jack replies as we all laugh. I sit up in bed and see everyone standing except Zach who is still next to me.
"Who's idea was it to pile in bed with Zach and I?" I ask.
"Zach" They all say as Zach says "Daniel"
I start to laugh and get out of bed.
"What shall I make for breakfast?" I ask, making my way into the kitchen.
"PANCAKES" Jack yells causing all the guys to yell at him for being too loud.
I proceed to make pancakes, well that was until someone hugged me from behind.
"I'm sorry about the other day. I've had run-ins with Grayson in the past and thought of him hurting you I didn't like. The guys all know and I'm pretty sure Daniel would kill me if I didn't warn you first. Please be careful with him" Jonah says and hugs me tight.
"it's okay Jo. You don't want to see him hurt me. I promise I will be careful with him" I smile and continue cooking. he kisses the back of my head before walking off. I just about finish all the pancakes before another set of arms wrap around me. I could tell it was Zach because he always rests his head on my shoulder.
"what did Jo want?" He asks.
"he come to say sorry about over reacting and to be careful with Grayson" I say and put another pancake on the plate.
"good" he kisses my shoulder and leaves. I put the pan in the sink and place the pancakes onto separate plates.
"Boys, breakfast" I yell out. Jacks comes running in but ends up falling. I start laughing as he jumps back up. He runs and hugs me.
"thank you" he smiles, kissing my cheek and running off with his pancakes. The other boys come in and take their food.
"that boy really cares for you" Corbyn emerges from out of no where.
"what do you mean?" I ask. He grabs his pancakes.
"It means that one of those boys cares about you a lot more that you think. He will tell you when he's ready. He just has a different way of showing it" he walks off smirking. I'm just so confused on what he's talking about. I shrug my shoulders and grab my pancakes. I walk into the lounge room and sit between Daniel and Zach. We talk and laugh as we eat.
"Oh my gosh" Daniel says from beside me. I look at him confused.
"You ate all your food. I'm proud of you" Zach almost screams, bringing me into a hug with Daniel also hugging me. They let go and Corbyn jumps up to hug him. Jonah and Jack just look back and forth at us confused. I got up and went to the kitchen to start washing up.
"Can I explain your anxiety to them? They wont stop bugging us" Corbyn comes in with everyone's plates and asks. I nod my head and continue washing.
It's better if someone else tells them. There is a reason behind my many types of anxiety, some very touchy. Well I'm anxious of my weight because of not only those bullies but I was always a chubby kid while all my siblings were skinny. Many of my family members always would point it out at reunions and stuff which made me hate it. Some would ask my parents if i was adopted right in front of me.
I also have stress anxiety. If I have a lot on my mind or start worrying about a heap of things at one time I have an attack. I don't even know how or when it started. One day I just started worrying about a few things and had an attack. Dad had to come in and help calm me down by helping me with an assignment.
You also know about my Loneliness anxiety. I was left alone a lot of the time when I was younger and always had to walk home from school because Mum didn't care. Sometimes Anna would walk home with me but one day when she didn't I was attacked. Some older kids came and hit me, stealing a lot of the stuff I had in my bag. I was so afraid I started struggling to breathe, thinking about what mum would say. It happened a few times and our house was also broken into when it was just me at home. Since then I've had a fear of being attacked again when I'm alone but some things help me. I also fear that I wont be accepted and that can lead to an attack.
I have a few other phobias but they aren't as bad as the others. Like public humiliation, hate it. I finish washing up and start to dry everything. I can hear them talking about me as well which makes me feel uneasy. I finish putting the last plate away and place the cloth on the bench. I turn around and find the guys all watching me. My eyes widen as Jack and Jonah run over and hug me.
"Thanks guys but I don't need the sympathy" I try pushing them off me.
"NOOOO." Jack yells. The others join not letting me escape.
"Come on guys, you gotta finish packing" I try squirm out. That's another thing. I don't like a lot of direct attention and this is testing me. They all pull away and I see Zach looking at me worried. He grabs my arm and drags me away.
"what's wrong?" he asks. I shake my head.
"It's the attention. I don't like everyone fussing over me. They have no reason to. Nothing they do will change it" I fall onto my bed.
"I know but they love you Indi. They care a lot about you" he sits next to me.
*unknown*
"did we do something wrong?" I ask as Zach drags her away from us.
"no, she just doesn't like everyone fussing over her." Corbyn answers. I still feel like I did something wrong. Just like last time we left. The others leave except Corbyn. "Bro don't worry. You did nothing wrong." he hugs me. I imagine its her and hug him though she is a lot shorter than Corbyn. Ah how much I feel i'm falling for her. I don't even know how, I don't do much with her.
"I don't know why I like her so much. I don't do that much stuff with her" I express, letting go of Corbyn.
"It's because you are both so similar and more your type then-" he is interrupted by Indi running downstairs, screaming as Zach chases her. I smile at them and watch them leave the kitchen. I turn back to Corbyn and see him smirking at me. "You will realise soon how much she matters to you" he pats my back and walks off.
I shake my head and walk up to my room. Ah I need to tell her how I feel but she has a boyfriend. And I have a girlfriend. Stuff it. I grab my phone and switch over to the band account on Instagram. I pull up the account and directly message her.
"look, I know you have a boyfriend but listen. I think I love you okay, I just can't bring myself to tell you in person because you and I don't have many things we do together. I'm still falling for you. Just everything about you makes me smile, from the way you dance around the kitchen when you cook, too how you play with your fingers out of nerves. Ah I just love everything about you. Ever since you got here I knew there was something I loved about you. I was given one of your old possessions by one of the others so I didn't feel like you weren't there with me. Please don't ask who I am because I don't think you will be happy with me. I love you though~ your secret admirer"
I type it out and send it. I smile to myself and decide to go downstairs, passing Indi who walks into her room.
*indi*
I walk into my room, re reading the message, wondering which of the guys sent it. I know its not Corbyn or Daniel because yeah, you get my reasons. It's not Zach either because hes always with me and we were in a tickle fight when I got the message. But then again, he could have got one of the guys to send it or my phonelagged. Nah he wouldn't do that, but Jack and Jonah both have girlfriends. I let out a loud groan and flop onto my bed. A sudden image comes to mind and I run to grab my drawing book and pencils. I start to sketch it out and realise what it is, its a set of magnificent flowers. it was a bunch of white carnations with red middles. In the middle of the bunch sat a small, gold bracelet with a note saying 'I love you'.
"What you up too?" Corbyn says, entering the room.
"I don't know. I just saw an image and drew it" I reply as he sits next to me on my bed.
"Do you think something triggered it?" He asks.
"Yeah, I got a DM from the band account. It was one of the guys confessing their love to me" I show him the message. he laughs a bit.
"Well you're going to have to wait to find out who it is" he gets up and starts to walk out. "oh. Daniel wants you downstairs in five"
I leave my stuff on my bed and quickly use the bathroom. I then walk downstairs and into the lounge room. I walk in and see all the guys sitting down, looking at me. I notice a chair in front of them all and sit in it.
"so, I know you don't like being here alone and we will be away for a while, so we got you some stuff" Daniel smiles at me. I shake my head no.
"no, I can't take it. There is no reason for this and I stand by that. I don't need it. I'm fine" I say, getting up and going to leave. I feel someone grab my wrist and turn me around. It was Jack.
"please don't go. Stay and accept them. They aren't that bad" he say, letting go of my wrist.
"Fine" I scowl and go sit down. I don't want all the attention.
"I'll go first. Here's my gift" Corbyn smiles as he was sitting closest to me. He hand over a wrapped box from behind him. I look at him sceptical but proceed to open it. It was just a plain box. I find the opening and open the lid. In it was a pair of Corbyn's goofy glasses, a bandana and nice necklace that was a small diamond. I smile at him.
"thanks Corbs" I put the necklace on.
"I guess we will go around so I'm next" Jack smiles. He pulls out a roughly wrapped gift from behind him. I open it carefully and find a jumper. I unfold it and stuff falls out making me squeal. The guys laugh and help me pick them up. The jumper was a plain black one with the words 'girl boss' on the front of it in white. I look through the stuff that fell out and find a heap of new brushes and paints.
"thanks Jack" I smile at him. Next was Daniel.
"I want to save mine for last" he asks, kinda. The other nod and Jonah gives me his. I open the box and find a heap of stuff in it. There was little things like a key chain of an artist palette, small chocolates, little sponges for painting, some bath soaps and a few bathbombs. There was also a set of black, silk pjs and a smaller box. I opened the box and saw a bracelet, similar to my drawing but it had little dangling charms. There was six; an art brush, a plane, Eiffel Tower, music note, cooking spoon and the why don't we logo.
"oh jo, thank you" I smile and place it all back in the box. I see Zach smiling at me wide. "Oh no, what is it?" I ask, semi scared. He runs off and I look at the others.
"We don't have a clue" Daniel answers without me saying anything. We hear a bang and turn around to see Zach pushing in a big box.
"damn Zach." I frown, placing everything on the floor and walking over to the box.
"it's kinda heavy" he pants and goes to sit down. I open the top and see it stuffed to the brim. I shake my head and start unloading stuff.
Jumpers, shorts, shirts, shoes, all types of accessories were on the top lever. I removed a piece of cardboard from the middle and found a heap of stuff. Chocolate, new heat pack, blanket, books, coffee, socks, more teddy bears and a new speaker. There was also a metal, make up looking box. I opened it and it had all types of art stuff in it.
"why do you do this Zach" I smile wide. I put it all back in except some socks, I put them on. Note I'm still in my pj's which consists of a large, oversized shirt and some shorts. The boys are the also still in pj's.
"because I love you and you deserve it" he gets up and hugs me. I hug him tight and sit back down.
"I hope you like it" Daniel smiles, handing over an envelope. I open it to find a leaflet and two tickets. I look closer at the leaflet and see-
"An art expedition" I scream, jumping up.
"yeah, and some of your art will be in it. You will get to meet a heap of other artists and some of your art fans" Daniel smiles wide, standing up.
"Ah, thank you Daniel, thank you so much" I squeal, jumping into his arms. Some of my favourite artists are going to this and I'm so thankful for the experience I will have. I jump back down after a while of hugging Daniel.
The rest of the afternoon was spent playing video games and helping them all pack. Zach also helped me sort through my things, placing all my gifts in one spot. We decided to go out to dinner so we all eventually showered. I put on a long, silver sequin dress that had a cut in the side, up to mid thigh. It had thin straps and a v-live neck that rest just above my bra. I added some white heels, pearl earrings, silver choker, the necklace Corbs got me, the bracelet Jo got me and some others. I curled my hair and added a little makeup. I get down stairs and find the guys in a range of suits. Jonah saw me first and tapped Daniels arm, all the guys turned around and saw me, gasping.
"You look great Indi" Corbyn smiles as the others nod.
"Well, lets go then" I smile back.
Daniel holds my arm, whenever we walk anywhere. We sat at a circle table, it going me, Daniel, Corbyn, Jack, Jonah then Zach. we ate and had a lot of fun until I heard my name.
"Indi" I turn and see Ethan, Gray and James.
"hey guys" I smile getting up. I hug E and James and kiss Gray.
"Who are they?" Gray quietly scolds. I look at him angry before turning around.
"This is my brother Daniel and best friends, Corbyn, Jack, Jonah and of course my absolute best friend Zach. Guys this is Ethan, James and Grayson" I smile, trying to get over Gray's deal.
"we are out having dinner with Indi before we leave again." Jonah smiles at them. oh no. i forgot abo-
"at least we don't chose to let her stay behind" Gray stirs, looking straight at Jonah.
"it was our management not us. And she is coming to some of the Europe shows." Daniel spits. this isn't good.
"oh and we don't bully her for her to confess something" Jonah smirks. Gray growls and I grab his and Ethan's arms, dragging them out, guessing James will follow.
" I am trying to have a good time with my family before they leave again. Don't ruin this for me" I scold and walk back in, not caring to say bye. "I'm sorry guys"
"Its okay Indi. Its their fault. Come on, lets go home and watch movies" Zach smiles. Daniel walks with me and Zach to my car. the others take an uber. We arrive home before the others and rush to change and get the movie ready. We all it in front of the TV, snacks in hand and watch the movie. I eventually fall asleep on someone.
*unknown*
holy shit, she fell asleep on me. I took a chance by sitting next to her and it was a good one. I notice everyone except Corbyn also asleep but he was focused on the movie. I slide my arm around her, letting her collapse into my side. She wraps her arms around me, digging her head into my chest for comfort, but not finding it. I roll over a bit and she becomes comfy, smiling in her sleep. I put both arms around her and smile. Shes in my arms for real this time. If only Grayson wasn't suck a jerk, I might be happy for them then but I'm not. She deserves better, someone who really cares, someone who can cherish and help her. Someone like me.