Chapter 11: "If it's True Love, it's Meant to be."
You could say I am two things right now. Overly relieved and completely shell-shocked. The person standing in front of me right now, is someone that I did not expect to see. I figured after high school, I would never see him again. Rarely do people stay in touch after high school. Unless you stay in the town you live in. But it’s basically logic right? At least that is what I thought. So that is why I am more than shocked to see him. But a part of me is completely relieved to see him. Someone that I have been needing to see someone who actually makes me smile. I have been so emotionally drained lately, an old friend could possibly cheer me up. At least I think that is what I need right now.
“Well don’t you just look stunning tonight?” Cooper commented, making me blush. Cooper in a way was a big part of my life. He was a memory that I really did not want to forget. I know the relationship with him and I did not turn out well. H*ll none of my relationships have. But due to Charlie being a snitch and my mother being an invading of my privacy b*tch, I was forced to break up with him. I felt really bad breaking up with him, which lead him to never talking to me for over two years. I know I should have not done it over text messages, but it would of been so awkward in person, and we all know how much of a coward I can become. It was strange though. I thought we would never talk again in my life, but we had no signs of communications until tenth grade. When he started talking to me again, I was shocked. So we decided to stay friends together until we pretty much stopped talking after graduation. Luckily I was not having feelings for him anytime soon. I just do not need any guy drama in my life right now. I will stop feeling anything for Cooper, and TOC is way out of my league. Not in looks, but I just mean ever dating him again and what not.
“Cooper? Wh-what are you doing here? In Las Vegas? We live the whole way in Charleston, South Carolina! Does your mother know you are here? I cannot believe you are here. Like is this for-” I began rambling on with the most stupid, idiotic questions that came to mind. But what did you expect me to do? Sit back and think everything was cool? That it was not weird to find TOC in the city that was my designated place to travel to?
“Hello to you to Mickey. But I just came here because I am just living my life you know? Finally where I want to be. But tell me, what brings you here to Vegas?” He questioned, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. Jesus he had some toned arms. Shut the f*ck up Mickey. Boys are yucky and have cooties!
“Well Charlie, my best friend and I decided to come on a road trip here together, and we ended up finding to boneheads. Charlie's twin brother Cooper, and her ex-boyfriend, Alexander Gates. You remember him right?” I told him, and he just nodded his head. Of course everyone knew who Alexander f*cking Gates was. You would have to have been living under a rock to not know he was the biggest d*uche of d*uche history. Literally he could be the king of them.
“Oh so the other Cooper? Tell me how was his ‘boarding’ school?” TOC questioned, smirking at me.
“Well I guess it went good, I dunno. He is back in one piece though, so that must mean something right? But enough talk about them. Charlie and I are not exactly on speaking terms right now, and I am just more stressed out than anything. But uh how are you doing?” I asked, attempting to take the attention off of me. I really was not someone who liked talking to other people about myself. I would rather know about that person versus them finding out about me. Back to the coward Mickey I was.
I really could not fathom the idea of Cooper and the other Cooper being together in the same room. Not that they would really be associating, it's just they are in the same building though. I dunno but it was strange, if that made any sense. But I have no idea what to say. Why is Cooper even talking to me though.? I really thought he would never speak to me again. I mean would you speak to me either? After I did such a childish thing and broke your heart? Ugh, but not Cooper, but the other Cooper. The Cooper I dated.
“I’m doing good, now that you are here.” He told me, making me blush. Let me just say that he was probably one of the cutest boys ever. Well basically everything about him is cute. His looks, personality, everything about him. Maybe that is why I just fell head over heels for him. Or perhaps it’s because his name is Cooper. I guess I have a thing for guys named Cooper if you honestly think about it.
But the other Cooper was really cute. I would not say he was hot. See some guys just have a ‘cute’ look to them. It sounds really complicated, but That is what Cooper has. He was taller than me, which was a turn on. He had dark brown hair and greenish-blue eyes. His eyes always sparkled in the light. Which was perfect. I was pretty sure he had abs. He just looked toned. Oh and I could not forget about how he smelled really good. I just liked him a lot. Well I do not anymore. But I suppose I can say that I do not regret dating him. I mean who would?
“You are such a flirt.” I teased, playfully hitting his shoulder.
“Only to you my sweet Mickayla.” He replied, smiling down at me. Yeah I was pretty sure where he had to look down at me. But I guess it was sweet how he called me his 'sweet Mickayla'. Only if every guy acted like he did, then love would be all over the world. Aha.
“I feel like I have not seen you in ages. But I guess that’s just the beauty of time. It can seem way longer than it actually is.” I muttered, flipping my hair behind my shoulder. Yeah, I will not lie, sometimes I thought flipping my hair would get the attention of guys. So they would be like 'oh my god you are hot'. Well at least I pictured that in my mind.
“You know I always liked your ways with words. You are so.. poetic.” He told me, making me look up at him in disbelief. Who even says that though? Like how am I even poetic? I thought I sucked at Englush class.
I wish there could be one way possible to control blushing. I basically blushed at the most simplest things. He probably was going to start laughing at me. Teasing me because he made me blush so easily. But I cannot control how dark my cheeks are. I just have this natural red tint to them, it's strange. It makes me look like I am either blushing really hard, or I put on an excessive amount of blush. But do I rarely wear makeup. I am actually too laszy to get up earlier for school just to apply make up. What stupid person does that?
“I am far from a poet.” I said, smiling at Cooper. I suppose you could say I feel so much more alive now. It’s as if I was revived with a spark on energy. After moping around, and pretending I was okay, when in reality I just wanted to show everyone how I truly felt. Maybe it is not always good to bottle up your emotions and pretend as if everything is ok. But why would Charlie or Cooper give a f*ck about my feelings? If I was them, I would pretend I was invisible. Just so I was not pulled into the trap. Not that I would try to 'trap' them. I just assumed they would be like 'get the f*ck away', or 'go cry in the f*cking corner'. But maybe I am just reading into this too much. Maybe they would care about me, and I am just judging them like someone judges a book by it's cover. Then again who knows..
“Can I just say that you look f*cking sexy in that dress?” Cooper whispered in my ear, sending chills down my spine. Why is it that all of these boys named Cooper have been having effects on me? Can I just say that I do not like it? I mean why do I even have to like anyone? Can't people just pass by in life without looking at a guy and getting all tingly inside? I mean that would be f*cking awesome. Sometimes though I wish people were not able to have emotions. I think it would be much easier to feel nothing than to feel all the worst you can. Then again you get those people who are like, 'I would rather be broken hearted by you than feel nothing'. How stupid can someone actually be about this?
Snapping out of my thoughts, I replied to the other Cooper. “You know I thought it made me look more like a hooker you know? It's such a cliche dress though. It is short, black, and shows just enough cleavage for me to be comfortable with."
“Oh I could never picture sweet and innocent Mickey being a hooker.”
“Well actually-oh wait you do not want to know that story.” I said, remembering back to the confrontation with the hookers and thugs.
“No, no, I think I do want to hear this. Please, please tell me.”
“Alright well if you insist.” I said, looking at him before he nods his head, instructing me to prolong. “Okay so you remember Alexander Gates? Well he said he had these ‘friends’ who could get us some fake ID’s. So of course we were like awesome lets do that. So keep in mind that this was a really shady place to actually be getting fake ID’s at. Well when Charlie and I first came into view, the view being the guy making out with two women. Anyways though these two hookers thought we were the strippers he called for. So they got really p*ssed off and were like ‘he is mine’. Not that I cared because he was rather disgusting if I must say so. But right when we were about to leave one of the hookers throws a used condom at me, obviously trying to get a rise out of me. So I wanted to let her know who was on top. Since she thought she was all this. Me being the smart girl I am, I say to the girl do you want to have a stripping contest? This got her started since she was the ‘better’ stripper obviously. So I ended up stripping down to my undergarments. I almost took my bra off but Cooper stopped me. So yeah I got to be a stripper for once in my life. Something you would probably never imagine right?” I explained to him, taking a deep breathe as I gasped for air.
“Well all I can say is that I would have loved to be there. I mean you do have a hot body there. Can I pay you to give me a strip tease later?” He asked, smirking at me. I really loved his smirk. Shut up Mic, you need punched in the face.
“Okay, okay, go back to being the cute, romantic guy you are. Ask me out.” I jokingly said, pursing my lips. Wait, did I just ask him to ask me out? Well I hope he does not think I want to be his girlfriend. I just meant it in a joking manner. Like ask me to get a drink with you or something along those lines.
“Mickey, would you like to get a drink over at the bar?” He queried, pointing over to the bar that was on our right side.
“Why yes Coop, I would love to be escorted over to the bar by you.” I said, placing my hand out as he took a strong grasp of it.
“Then what are we waiting for?”
So Cooper and I walk over, finding two empty bar stools to take seats on. As I take a seat, a loud squeak noise comes from the chair, and you can tell these are older chairs. Cooper calls up a bartender and orders us two drinks. We hand over our ID’s, and I watch as the bartender takes longer than neccessarry to look at mine. This actually gives me a mini heart attack because what if he is like, you are not twenty-one? But finally he gives it back, and I gladly retrieve it, placing it back in my wristlet.
“You know Coop, I have not laughed this hard since god only knows when. You are really funny.” I said, and this was the truth. Maybe it was the few drinks I had speaking for me, but I am trying to be honest here. He really was a funny person. Another plus about him.
“Mickey are you-oh I see you are busy with him. I guess I’ll just go find the two lovebirds.” Cooper(charlie’s brother) told me walking away so quickly that I had absolutely no time to process what had just happened.
“Are you fighting with Cooper too?” The other Cooper asked, looking at me with a confused facial expression.
“No why?”
“Well I was just surprised by what he looked like. He seemed jealous that you were with me and not him. It’s like he had a crush on you or something.”
“Oh Cooper, you are being idiotic. That must of been a complete misunderstanding. It’s pretty obvious that he does not have a crush on me.”
“Whatever you say.”
I can tell he was not convinced, but if Cooper liked me, then why would he act like he does not? I mean he does not really act like he hates me, but he never makes it seem like he likes me or anything. Ugh why are boys so f*cking confusing? He just confuses me and maybe that is why I have mixed feelings about him.
“I am going to go to the bathroom real fast. I will be right back.” I informed Cooper, grabbing my wristlet and making my way towards the bathroom doors.
On my way out, I randomly glance around the dance floor, and spot Cooper with another girl. The girl is literally grinding on him. I intensely watch as Cooper places his hands on her hips, pulling her closer. Me being the person I am, I go up to him.
“Hey Cooper. How are you?” I asked, smirking at him. I receive a scowl from the girl as she impatiently glares at me.
Cooper gives me one quick glance before crashing his lips against this random girl, grabbing into her face as he deepens the kiss. For a split second I felt tears reach the brim of my eyes. Closing my eyes, I forced back the tears before giving Cooper a broad smile.
“Well you sure seem to be having a good time! I will let you two alone. Just remember, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” I said, winking at him. After that, I ran off to the bathroom and closed the stall. It took literally everything in me to prevent these tears. See I was right about one thing. Cooper definitely did not like me like I liked him. Though it truly hurt, the truth might always be the one to hurt.
I opened up the stall door, and looked at myself in the mirror. When I was in my junior high years, I was not what a guy nowadays called ‘hot’. I had glasses, braces, and I was rather plump. Though I always felt bad about myself, it was just easier to see the worst than the good in me. But thankfully Charlie was by my side supporting me through thick and thin. If it was not for Charlie, I probably would have never managed to lose all the weight I did. I was probably nearing one hundred and fifty pounds. Now that I lost all the weight, I can actually see the good in me. I also used to think I was never ugly, maybe it was because everytime Charlie and I were around guys, they would show her the attention. Not me. I was the third wheel. Of course Charlie would have understood how I felt about this, but how could I crush her moments like that? I would probably be the number one b*tch if I did. I was her best friend, not her worst enemy. Charlie’s happiness is so much more better than anything else. I know it probably sounds like we are in a committed relationship. But it’s just, I never had a friend like Charlie before. She was the only person who ever saw the good in me, or helped me transform into the hotter Mickey Anderson. And this is another reason as to why Charlie needs to get her head out of her *ss and be my best friend again. I misss my f*cking friend. My f*cking best friend. It hurts so badly. Now I regret all of the times telling her we should end things or I do not ever want to be her friend again. Because to be honest that is total bullsh*t. I would not be standing here where I am if it was not for Charlie. She was the only one who ever understood anything about me. We were always thinking the same things or just being us. I could be me around her, and she could be herself around me. I really just want my best friend back. I am a complete mess without her. I wish she would be talking to me on ‘good’ terms, just so I could tell her everything. H*ll she does not have to ever be my friend again, as long as she would hear me out, I think I would be satisfied. To know that she heard every little truth about our friendship. If f*cking Alex was not here, then I would be hugging my best friend right now and be gossipping about how TOC was here. But instead I am basically talking to myself about it. Or at least thinking about it. I just want Charlie to know how much I love her. And for her to know that she could never be replaced. Also that she would not be a forgotten memory in my mind. Rather a memory I hold onto for the rest of my life, and think about every time I am feeling down. She cannot just abandon me like this. Look how much we have been through these past fifteen years. She is the missing piece to my puzzle. She is the other half of me. She is my rock. Charlie Weathers is my spiritual animal. She is my idol. The person that I have longed to be. The person that I would rather fight with. The one who will have the most space in my heart. The one that will be nearly impossible to forget about. No matter how hard I tried. And to think that she might just turn her back on me, and forget whatever we had going. The friendship that we both promised to never break.
Why is it that people have to get attached so easily to people? It would hurt way less if she did not have such a great impact on my life. But what am I even saying? I want her back so badly. I almost sound like a guy wanting his ex girlfriend back. Aha. But who wants to leave the person that they have been best friends with for over ten years? I can assure you that I sure as h*ll do not want to lose her. I know I keep saying that over and over again, but I am just emotional and I have no idea what to do. How do I get her back? Especially if she is not willing to try and talk to me. How am I suppose to feel? I just want to sit on the floor and cry my eyes out. Maybe I should talk to a conselour or something. Would that do me some good? Because I obviously do not have a caring mother I can discuss any of my feelings or problems with.
I would rather have Charlie as my best friend versus a million dollars. I would rather be her friend than date Ryan Gosling. This is how much I love her. I would trade everything in the world that I have just to have her friendship back.
And part of me wonders if she feels the same way.
Taking one last good look in the mirror, I proceed my way back to the bar where TOC is waiting for me.
“Sorry for taking so long. I just got wrapped up in my thoughts.” I told him, taking my glass in my hand and chugging the rest of it down so it was empty.
“Hate to tell you this, but I seen Cooper take that girl into a back room or somewhere.”
“Well I do not give a f*ck. It’s his penis he’s putting inside of her. Not mine.”
“You are not upset?”
“F*ck no. Maybe she will end up biting his d*ck off for all I know.”
“Haha, well do you want to go back to my place? I have chocolate ice cream and sad movies.” TOC informed me, making my heart jump at the gesture. Ice cream and sad movies with an old friend sounds like the best thing that I have ever heard in my existence of life.
“Of course you know I would love to.” I said, getting up from my barstool.
“So did you really mean it when you wanted his d*ck to be bitten off?”
“Of course. I only speak truth.”
We walk out of the bar, hand in hand. It was super great that his hotel room was beside the bar. Very convenient actually. I followed him inside his suite, kicking my heels off. They hurt bad enough.
“Are you thirsty? Or do you just want ice cream?” He asked, making me smile.
“Ice cream is great.”
I walked over to his display of movies before settling on one of my all time favorites. I know it’s probably a bit cliche, but I cannot help myself. Zac Efron is just beyond perfect.
“Charlie St. Cloud? Is it weird that that movie happens to be one of my all time favorites?” he asked, placing a bowl of chocolate ice cream in my hands. I quickly put the disk in before we snuggled up together in the bed he had here.
“No, just something else we have in common. But I probably should for warn you. I become a sobbing mess after watching this movie. It’s almost as bad as a baby crying.”
“I am sure you are still beautiful after you have just cried.”
“Why must you say cute things to me?”
“Cause I am a hopeless romantic.”
“Shut the f*ck up. You know you will find someone someday, so why cry about it?”
“Please do not take this the wrong way, but I cannot believe how much hotter you became after you hit puberty. It’s as if you walked out of a magazine. And to think I never tried again with you. Boy was I a f*ck up.”
“Do not say that. You are nothing compared to a fu*ked up person. If anything, any girl would be glad to claim you as theirs.”
“Do you truthfully mean that?”
“As they say, if you love something enough you set it free. If it’s true love, it’s meant to be.”
The credits to the movie begin playing, and I cannot stop crying like the little baby I am. I swore once or twice I caught TOC shedding some tears of his own, but I was probably wrong. Why would he cry?
“You did not lie about the crying part.”
“Like I said, I speak the truth. But I just get so emotional during movies. Or maybe its the fact that I am such an emotional mess right now. Like I cannot even begin to tell you how I feel.”
“Well I have all night to listen.”
“I do not want to bore you with my problems.”
“I would rather listen to you talk than be out with a hooker I’ll never contact again.”
“Really?”
“Just the sight of you is the most romantic thing I have ever seen. Mickey, you are beyond flawless. Any man would be lucky to have you. Can I just say that Charlie’s brother is a total dumb*ss for letting you go before him? It’s so obvious that he likes you, and he just let you go like that. If I was him, I would man up and ask you out. But because I do not want to break any bro codes, I wouldn’t do anything like that.”
“Cooper, I really have always admired you.”
“As I have always admired you and your beauty. Girls would kill to be you. Why do you think girls get plastic surgery or wear make-up? So they can be just like you. But you-you do not have to try and look breathtaking. It just comes natural to you.”
Before I know it, Cooper leans down and places his soft, delicate lips against mine. Our lips move in sync, and it is just the most overwhelming filling in the existence of feelings. I place my hands on his cheeks, just as he wraps his arms around my waist. And at this moment, I regret never giving him a second chance. Because he may be saying all these romantic things to be a flirt, but he d*mn well knows how to capture my heart. And maybe, just maybe I will let go of the feelings for Cooper, and have them replaced with feelings for TOC. I would not say I am in love, but I am on the edge of falling.
Cooper’s POV:
I could not believe I did that, I'm so f*cking stupid.
So here I was, sitting on the huge couch in Alex's giantic living room at five o'clock in the morning, wating for Mickey to get back from that guy's house. It was like she knew him, and that scared me. The way she let him touch her so easily and how they laughed together like they were old pals was keeping Cooper up. Thus why he was up so early.
He knew he drove her to this though. He was the one who just had to try to make her jealous with another girl. He was the one who made her so pissed off and upset that he her into another man's arms.
God, and why did he have to f*ck that girl?
She tasted like cheap alcohol and cirgarettes and I shuttered everytime I thought about f*cking her brains out--which he did, but that wasn't the point. I supposed I just got so mad that I got horny and frustrated and I took it out with sex. I did that a lot. F*cked out of anger, that was.
"F*ck!" I screamed and threw the phone that was in my hands across the room. It hit a wall and fell limply to the floor with a sorry 'thump' and a horribly cracked screen. "F*ck..." I muttered sullenly, looking at my cracked iphone. Maybe I should join an angermanagement class?
I tried not to think about what she could possibly be doing right now, but the thoughts came anyway. She probably f*cked him. She probably let him fuck her multiple times in different positions. It was all my fault, now Mickey had to live with losing her virginity to an ass just because she wanted to prove a point to me. This was all so f*cked up.
I turned on the TV in hopes of trying to ease this whole situation from my mind. It didn't work. Every show I watched just reminded me of her, or him, or sex, or just life in general.
I heard the door open at seven o'clock.
I jumped up instantly as I saw her walk through the door. I scanned my eyes across her apperance, checking to see if it looked as if she had spent all night f*cking someone. I couldn't tell; her hair was messy but not the sex kind of hair, and her clothes were wrinkled but didn't look like she had slept in them. She didn't even acknowledge me as she walked through the living room.
"Where were you all night?" My voice boomed, making Mickey turn around and look at me with wide, frightened eyes. Then the fright turned into hate. I'd been perpared for that though.
"You're not my father. It's none of your f*cking business." She spat before turning around and walking away. I jumped up at lightning speed and bolted to her side, grabbing ahold of her wirst and pulling her to a stop so she'd look at me.
"Yes, it is my business." She laughed bitterly at my reply.
"No, you can't just do that, Cooper!" She exclaimed, yanking her wirst from my grasp and taking a step back from me. "You made it very clear last night that you didn't give a f*ck about me or what I did. So just say the f*ck away from me, okay?"
She ran up the stairs before I could tell her how f*cking stupid I was.