~Nico~
It's neither hot nor cold. All I feel is numb. Snow swirls around me in a dangerous dance. I can feel the pressure of the wind against my skin and the snow on my feet, but it doesn't affect me. My mind is similar to the storm that rages around me.
I can't believe that I just blew up back there. I know I shouldn't have done that in front of the alpha, and especially Alex. Alex who pushed me away not but moments ago. Even though I despise it, I can't blame his actions. He's only doing as I would do, distancing himself. It's all my fault, but knowing that doesn't stop the aching pain in my chest. It's the only thing that I can feel besides the burning anger towards everything else.
Just the sight of Mirabella looking so happy with her family made me angry. She was acting oblivious to the world while I'm suffering because of what she took a part in. Now the truth is out in plain sight. The spell can't be reversed without a Druid and supposedly I have a sister named Eleanor. This day just keeps getting better.
My eyes snap to the warm glow of the Omega Cabin's lights that pierce the darkness. Feeling a sense of relief, I quickly climb the porch steps to reach the door. Inside, warmth washes over me. It's familiar territory. My shoulders slump and I drag myself to my bedroom to change out of my, once again, wet clothes.
A knock on my door resounds before I finish changing, so I go over and answer it. Somehow I'm not surprised when I open it up to see Dom standing there. He has a scowl on his face and I can tell I'm in trouble.
"Where the hell were you, Nico?" Dom demands.
"I was out, OK?" I say, avoiding his glare.
"You said you were going to the infirmary for a check-up, but you never came home, so I called the nurse, she said you never came in, so where were you?"
"I was with Alex," I half-lie, turning around to walk further into my room. I run my fingers through my surprisingly dry hair.
"Hey, is that a tattoo on your neck?!" Dom inquires, hysterical. He rushes into the room and touches Nyx's mark on my neck.
My heart jumps and I freeze. "I, ah, I've had it for a long time now," I lie.
"Don't mess with me, I know that's a lie, where did you get this and when?"
"Just mind your own business, OK, Dom?" I say snappishly.
Dominic's hands pull away and he gives me a confused look. "What's wrong with you lately?"
"Nothing, now just leave me alone, please." I start herding him to the door and slamming it shut behind him.
It hurts to push Dom away too, but I really need to be alone right now to think over everything. I need to come up with a plan for how I'm going to fix everything.
A wave of grief washes over me and I crumple to the floor. I curl my knees to my chest and lay my head down on top of them. My mind drifts toward the broken mirror in my bathroom, why does my whole world feel like that right now? How can I pick up these pieces?
~*~*~*~
The rest of the week passes by at a snail's pace. Noct and I keep up the recovery, and, little by little, it seems to be working; I'm finally putting on some weight. Dom seems a little distant since that night-- since I pushed him away-- and I don't have any opportunities to run into Alex while cooped up in the Omega cabin-- not like I'm complaining, though.
So now it's been two weeks since that night at Alex's house. I feel my sanity slowly slipping from my grasp the more I stay holed up here. I decide it's about time I return to school. For better or worse. So I start to prepare my backpack for the venture, feeling jittery about returning. A bus doesn't reach this part of town, for obvious reasons, so I need to find a ride to bring me. I'm mulling over the prospect as I leave my room. Blake leaves his room at the exact same time and it's as though a light bulb switches on in my head and I get a moment of insight.
"Hey, Blake," I call out.
He's wearing an aviator jacket and his backpack is hanging off of one shoulder. He's ditched skinny jeans for sweatpants and he's wearing thick woolen socks. He turns around, "Hey, Nico, what's up?"
"Can you give me a ride to school? Be my carpool?" I inquire, readjusting the straps of my backpack.
"Yeah, sure. You're not riding with Alex?" He questions, slipping on snow boots.
I mentally recoil at his question, but I put on an indifferent smile. "Nah, he's been going with Kayla, and three's a crowd." I wonder when Blake is going to remember my breakdown from the other night over Alex.
Blake face-palms, "Of course, I forgot they go together." He zips up his jacket all the way to his chin. He grabs a grey beanie from within his pocket and slips it onto his head.
I put on my sneakers. He opens the door and I go to step out, but he holds me back.
"Aren't you going to put your coat on?" He asks, looking at me strangely.
"Right," I say, I run to my room and grab a hoodie, zipping it up mid-way.
"That's it?" He gives me that strange look again. The same look that asks the question, 'Are you OK?' I'm really starting to hate that look.
"Let's just go!" I complain as I push past him to reach the outdoors.
The ground is covered with a heavy blanket of snow and the sky is concealed by thick layers of grey clouds. It seems as though we're going to be getting more snow today. The wind whips at our faces and plucks at our clothes. Blake shivers in his thick coat, looking bitter.
"Ugh, I hate the cold," He groans, stepping off the porch, stuffing his hands deep into his pockets.
"It doesn't really bother me," I note, looking for any signs of goosebumps or shivering, but there isn't any. I guess the whole ordeal with Nyx really did change me. I'm not sure whether I should be worried or not. Does my body still suffer if I can't feel the elements?
Blake's cheeks are rosy and his nose is running by the time we get to the vehicle. "How are you not affected at all?" He asks incredulously, fumbling with the keys to his truck. "You're not even shivering! Are you an oven with your own supply of heat or something?"
I shrug and pull myself into the passenger seat. Our breath is white against the air in the car. Blake's hand reaches out desperately for the heat and turns it all the way up. We sit in the car for a good five minutes before Blake decides that it's time to go.
"It's not too hot for you, is it?" Blake inquires, driving down the winding roads. He loosens the scarf that threatens to strangle him.
"Nah, it's fine," I say, looking out the windows as the wintry scenery passes by. Not only can't I feel the cold, but I can't feel any warmth either. A pit of dread settles in my gut. Maybe I should worry.
"So, how are you feeling? Have you recovered enough to be going to school?" Blake questions, eyes on the road.
"Yeah, I'm perfectly fine. Plus, if I stayed in that cabin one more day, it would've turned into The Shining." I joke.
Blakes laughs heartily. "Honestly, I'm surprised you lasted two weeks. I thought you would've escaped much faster than that."
I give a sly grin, "Who says I didn't?"
"Oh, OK, Mr. Sneaky."
Blake and I banter back and forth, talking about school and pack events like the Christmas party as we go. It's good to be able to talk to someone without worrying about stepping on eggshells around them. When we arrive at the student parking lot, I'm almost disappointed to go, but I know that I have no choice.
The two of us wave goodbye as we part ways. I trudge through the bundled up crowd to my locker. My heart is pounding against my chest in nervousness. It's been so long since I've returned to school. I can't help but feel queasy with anxiousness.
Groups of people crowd the halls and chatter, filling the air with a cacophony of sound. The background noise serves to calm me down, though, it was too quiet in the woods. Being around people feels a lot safer than when I was left to my own devices. The trip to my locker doesn't take long, but it's been a while, so I feel uncertain as to whether this is really my locker or not. School life seems like the remnants of a dream that I had almost forgotten. But just like always, I dial in my combination, and like magic, the metal door pops open. A wave of relief passes through me, finally, something familiar.
So lost in thought, I didn't even notice the guy standing next to me until he was already there. I glance over in surprise, wondering how long he's been there. He's got black hair with the tips dyed blue and his eyes are a turquoise color. Did such a hot guy always go to our school? I wish Blake would give these kinds of updates, like, there are new hot guys attending school, your mate has found a girlfriend, and you are cursed. But I can't blame the poor guy, he can only process so much with that dense head of his.
For no reason, other than the thrill of being out of the cabin, I turn to the stranger. "Hi, there, are you new?" I ask, not so subtly.
He looks down at me, because he's taller, and says, "I could ask you the same question. I've never seen you before."
"Well, I guess that makes two of us," I flash a coy smile, packing books into my empty backpack.
"Well, to answer your question, I am fairly new. I just started here in November." The new guy leans against his locker casually. He's lean like a cat and seems to be sly like one too.
"I've been going here forever," I say, "but I've been out for a month, and now I'm back." I close my locker with a small clang.
"Why were you out for a month?" He follows me as I stroll down the halls, his hands tucked into his pockets.
"I got sick, then there was some family drama, it was a terrible November." It's a small lie, but not too far from the truth.
"Man, that sucks. No one deserves that much bad luck." His blue eyes meet mine. I can't help but feel taken aback. It's as though he knew just what to say.
"Thanks. Sorry, we just met and I'm already spreading my gloom to you. I'm Nico by the way."
"I'm Luca," He says, "nice to meet someone cool, at last."
A light blush powders my cheeks. It's been a long time since someone's complimented me, and here I am, getting all embarrassed. "Well, thanks, you're cool too."
Luca and I hit it off, bantering as we walk down the halls in no particular direction. This moment, the here and now, was almost enough to make me forget about my tragic week and the prospect of being stuck in first period with Alex.
The sound of laughter pulls me from my thoughts. It wasn't the "good, friendly" kind of laughter. It was more like the poison-laced kind. I look over to see the kids from art club, standing around in a small crowd. Jessica with her bright dyed-red hair and Zane with his silver hair. They are all sneering at me, as though I was some disgusting animal in a cage at the zoo.
My stomach drops as Zane swaggers over to me, like as though he is some big shot. "Hey, Nico. It's been a while since you've shown your face. We all thought you transferred schools because the whole school found out you were gay."
"Hm, well you were wrong, you should really stop thinking, it's not good for you." I say, not phased by his shit talking in the least.
"Why don't you just leave him alone?" Luca says, standing above both Zane and me with his height.
Zane looks up at him unimpressed. "I see you've only been back for a few minutes and you're already fraternizing with the boys and having them work for you. That's the succubus Nico for you."
"Yeah, and if you don't watch out, Zane," I get close to his ear, "then you'll be next."
His cheeks flush red and he huffs before retreating to his fellow art kids. I turn back to Luca and smile, "We make a pretty good team. Thanks for looking out for me."
"No problem," Luca says, "...So, you're gay?"
My eyes narrow defensively, "Yeah, so what?"
Luca smiles, "Nothing, it's just better than I could have hoped for." His smile is like a secret that is shared between us.
Again, a light shade of embarrassment colors my cheeks, but I decide that any emotion is better than anger and sadness, or even worse, nothing at all. It's only been a couple minutes with Luca, but I feel like he and I will get along very well.
~*~*~*~
First period is just as awkward as I thought it was going to be. The tension between me and Alex is thicker than steel. A pot of emotions boils in my stomach. Roiling hatred, cringe-worthy embarrassment, and a hearty pinch of regret. Nothing is as it was, and I'm starting to lose faith that it can ever go back to what it was before.
The whole period I find a deep interest in my notebook, rather than even trying to steal glances at him. And a lack of spine-tingling, suggest he's not even paying me any mind either. Ignoring the lesson on the board, I open my notebook to a new sheet. At the top I write:
How to fix everything
If I'm going to work toward being normal again and fixing all that's been broken in the process of my so-called "protection," then I'm going to need to organize my thoughts by putting them on paper.
1) Find a Druid. Or discover that you're magically a Druid. Either way, we're going to need one to fix whatever hot mess we've been stuck in.
2) Find the exact spell that was casted on us, so that we can reverse this.
3) Upon release, kick Nyx's ass.
*Maybe not in this order, but something similar to all the above.
I finish writing, looking at my handiwork. So far so good. I underline and circle kicking Nyx's ass three times. She deserves to suffer, no matter her reason for putting me through what she has. I feel Alex's stare as I'm writing, so I glance over quickly. As soon as I do, I regret it-- he's glaring at me.
The expression on his face is close to what I can only associate with Zane's look earlier today, disappointment and disgust. I stick up my middle finger at him out of spite and return to writing in my notebook.
Find a place that Druid's like to live. If Eleanor is my sister, maybe she is at childhood home. Check there. If not, demand answers from Mirabella about potential whereabouts. Worst case scenario, pick up a spell book and start going at it.
My plan has so many holes in it, it feels as though it could slip right out of my hands like sand. But I'll take some leads over nothing.
~*~*~*~
When school ends, it's a blessing in disguise. Now I don't have to be anywhere near Alex. I swear, I can feel his presence throughout the school, even if I'm not in the same room. It's irritating and it's grating on my nerves like sandpaper.
I don't bother returning to Blake for a ride home, maybe he'll assume I got a ride from someone else. Instead, I decide to head out on my own. If I'm going to start fixing things, I better start right away before Nyx rips away all the pieces I have left.
The cold doesn't bother me, even when it starts snowing. "Great," I say, "just what I needed." It'll be harder to find my way in this storm. Nevertheless, I continue along the path that leads to home.
I wonder what I'll discover there. Will Eleanor be there? Will it be the same place I knew? Some small part of me ached that the lights of the house would be glowing, awaiting my return. That my parents would be in the kitchen, talking and cooking together in harmony. And Eleanor would be doing whatever she did in her spare time, maybe even listen to me about boy troubles. But the reasonable part of me knew that all that would be waiting is a husk of its former self. It should've returned to being just a building instead of a 'home.'
The snow sticks to the pavement and piles up in a white blanket of silence. The closer I get to the house, the more secluded the roads get. Cars are far and few in between. One even slowed down to ask me if I wanted a ride. I kindly declined. As much as I want to get to the house in a hurry, I know that only pain will surface when I do. So I'll milk my time by walking the miles it takes to get there.
What should have taken 30 minutes by car, took two hours by foot in a blizzard. The last bend that stands in the way slowly fades as I round it to get a nice look at the house at the end of the road. The only house. It's as white as the snow, almost camoflagued in the darkening evening. The only thing that's out of place is golden light that pours out of the windows, spilling out onto the yard and staining it honey-yellow.
All I can do is stand in the cold, motionless, breathless, staring at the house. Blinking to check whether I'm imagining it or not. But the lights remain bright even after I pinch my cheeks. Not daring a smile, I run along the walkway which has been shoveled neatly and salted. I get to the front door and pause. Hand shaking as I reach out for the handle, and not from the cold. What exactly am I going to find in here? Did some new family buy the house? Should I knock?
Feeling a bit stupid, I knock on the door loudly. The sound of running footsteps resound from behind the door and a sense of dread settles over me. Maybe this was a mistake. I step back, ready to run if need be. The door is thrown open and standing in the doorway is Eleanor. She's out of breath and her black hair, cut short, is curled to perfection. Her eyes are dark in the evening, but they twinkle brightly. Dressed in all black. The same height as me. It's Eleanor. My sister.
Tears well up in her beautiful eyes and she says three words, "Welcome home, Nico."
It's as though the weight of the world falls off my shoulders. I drop my backpack onto the porch. Slowly I take some steps toward her and pull her into a gentle hug, like, as if I squeeze her too hard, that she might disappear.
"I'm home, Eleanor." For the first time in a long time, tears of happiness sting my eyes.