It had been a somewhat strange journey up to Shropshire without any of the excitement that I had felt during my last visit.
For the most part, Ashcroft and I had travelled in complete silence. In fact, we hardly spoke at all, which was strange because usually we had plenty to say to one another.
Instead I would be looking out of the side window watching the scenery quickly speed by, as it changed from the grey buildings of the city to the green of the countryside.
Ashcroft, however seemed perfectly happy amusing himself by singing along to the tuneless pretentious crap that he had playing on a c.d.
I had begun to realise that we had a totally different idea in what constituted good listening material.
We did have one stop though, to refuel both ourselves and the car, where I did offer Ashcroft some petrol money, (something that I had quite forgotten about when Alan had taken me!).
The service station also, was not the one that I had previously stopped at with Alan and that saddened me especially when Ashcroft insisted on having a McDonald's. He did seem pretty disappointed with me as well when all I wanted was a strawberry milkshake.
He, however, tucked into a double cheeseburger with fries, followed by a huge mcflurry and then a milkshake. Considering he's a qualified chef, it surprised me somewhat that he would even consider eating such junk food, never mind devour it all with such enthusiasm!
Well, he did say in the trailer before that he was hungry!
He certainly wasn't joking!
By the time we got to Shropshire, however it was dark. Of course we hadn't set off particularly early and had also spent quite a bit of time at the service station too. So little wonder the daylight had disappeared as Ashcroft pulled his car to a halt outside my parents house.
He got out immediately and gave a big stretch before giving his surroundings the once over.
"Ah......the countryside". He announced, breathing in.
I was also now out of the car and abscent mindedly looked over towards the rear seats for an overnight bag only to then remember that I hadn't actually got one!
I scolded myself with annoyance that I hadn't insisted that Ashcroft drop me off at the flat first so that I could gather a few bits and pieces together and of course, let Marcus also know what I was doing!
Poor Marcus. He had been totally left in the dark about all of this! If he knew though, that I was with Ashcroft, he would probably try and stop me from going, as was his hatred for him.
I glanced over at the good looking specimen before me and was relieved to notice that none of my old feelings for him had resurfaced at all.
I was pleased.
Marcus would have nothing at all to worry about!
To me now, Ashcroft Jennings was just an old friend who had come to the rescue of another old friend.
Ashcroft had never seen me as anything more than that anyway.
All the feelings that I had harboured for him in the past had been inside the head of a nieve young girl. He had nothing to do with the way I had once felt about him. I suppose he thought of me as a brother would feel for his sister.
It had been pure infatuation on my part and absolutely none on his.
"Did you live here once?". He now asked turning to face me.
" Yes". I nodded, with a smile. "This is my family home. I lived here with my Mum, Dad and younger sister".
I looked up at the darkened Windows.
" But it would seem that they are all out at the moment " I added, as I now began to walk up towards the small narrow pathway that led up to the house.
Hearing the crunching of the stones behind me, I knew that Ashcroft was following as I now walked towards the patio area. Dad had told me that a key would be left in the usual hiding place outside, so I narrowed my eyes to look for the familiar yellow and red hand painted plant pot.
As I scanned my eyes along the vast array of similar looking pots, the young girl in me tried not to let Ashcroft see what I was looking for. It was a strange thing really for it had been drummed into our heads as children that no one should know where the key was hidden. It had always remained our family secret. Even now, as an adult and Ashcroft being one of my most trusted friends, I was at pains not to let him see!
"What are you doing?". He asked, obviously noticing my rather strange movements.
" Nothing. I'll be with you in a moment". I answered, trying to conceal what I was actually searching for.
He came towards me.
"Are you looking for something?". He asked.
I shook my head as my eyes were now frantically looking for the damned pot before he came any closer.
" Shall I get a torch?". He suggested. "I have one in the car".
There was no hiding it from Ashcroft. He knew damned well what I was doing! But with him going back to the car it would also give me some more, much needed time to look for the stupid painted plant pot.
I nodded my head.
" Thanks". I answered him lamely, turning around to look at him.
He was now standing away from me a little, looking at the house with obvious interest.
"You know". He then said, placing his hands into his trouser pockets, "It would have made things a lot easier if they had an outside light, the type that comes on automatically when someone approaches ". He said looking upwards.
" Oh Dad wouldn't have one of those". I said, "Says they're a security risk".
I noticed Ashcroft was now staring at me, although it was dark, I could just tell that he was.
" And hiding the spare key underneath a plant pot isn't! ". He then scoffed, before beginning to walk away.
" Would have been simpliar if he had just given you your own key though". He went on.
"Or doesn't he trust you".
Ashcroft then proceeded to walk away, no doubt with a smile upon his face. I knew he was right of course.
Why didn't I have my own key?
I was actually an adult now!
I resumed in my search, hoping that when I did eventually find the darned pot, there would be a key beneath it.
I took in a breath.
Bet Sarah had her own key. I thought to myself.
" Found it yet?". Ashcroft called out, as he came back up the path again.
Damn! He was back!
I lifted up another, what seemed like a brightly coloured pot and put my hand beneath it. Suddenly feeling the cold metal on my fingers I smiled with relief as I pulled out the front door key from underneath it.
"Got it!". I said triumphantly, forgetting myself for a moment, as I got to my feet.
Ashcroft stood there without saying a word as I made towards the door. I hoped it was the right one and not the key to the door of Father's shed!
" Walla! ". I exclaimed with both relief and happiness as the front door clicked open and I then walked inside.
Home at last! I now thought to myself as I switched on the light to the kitchen and then threw my bag onto the table.
Instantly I felt so relaxed as I crashed out on one of the wooden kitchen chairs and sighed deeply.
Looking back up again I could see that Ashcroft had not followed me inside.
I sat up.
The door was still open, but where was he?
" Ashcroft? ". I said, leaning forward.
He then peered around the door.
" I didn't want to just presume. After all it is your parents home". He said, almost apologetically.
I jumped up from the chair and went towards him. Then grabbing one of his hands I pulled him in.
"Don't be a numpty!". I giggled. " You're the reason I'm here".
I closed the door behind him, still holding his hand then said:
"Without you and your rescue mission, who knows what I would be doing and thinking right now".
He looked at me almost shyly and smiled.
" Thank you Ashcroft ". I then grinned at him. " You really are such a good friend to me".
And with that I embraced him in a big brotherly hug and squeezed him tightly.
He seemed a bit taken aback at first but then hugged me in return.
"I felt it was my duty, after all that I had put you through in the past". He said into my ear as I then felt him lightly kiss the top of my head.
I began to laugh to myself as I now pulled away to look at him.
" It's all in the past". I grinned. "I'm just so glad that we've managed to come out of it the other side and still friends. I mean, you did nothing wrong. It was just fantasies inside my head that was all. It's just a shame that you and Amelia have split up".
He moved away from me.
" I know ". He said sadly. " She thought I was seeing somebody else".
"Yes..... She told me". I nodded, going towards the kettle and proceeding to fill it with water.
" You've seen her?". He asked.
I turned to him and nodded.
"Yes. I have. Last night". I admitted.
Ashcroft's whole face suddenly seemed to light up.
" How.........how did she seem? Was she well?". He asked, almost excitedly.
I nodded slowly at him. I hadn't the heart to tell him everything. Especially that she seemed in excellent spirits and the fact that she had actually left with a bartender!
"Tea or coffee?". I asked him, now turning away to retrieve some mugs.
" Er, coffee". He answered somewhat quietly.
Ashcroft was obviously thinking about Amelia and I felt sorry for him.
Reaching the coffee jar down from the shelf, I suddenly turned to face him again.
"Why don't you ring her". I suggested. " I'm sure she'd appreciate a call. You never know, you may be able to make it up with her".
I watched as Ashcroft sadly shook his head.
"Why not?". I asked, staring at him. " Was there someone else?".
"No, no......of course not!". Ashcroft said, almost angrily.
I stepped backwards onto the work surface, surprised by his out burst.
" Who do you take me for?". He went on.
"I.....I was just asking". I said turning from him to make the coffee.
" Sorry". I heard a mumble from behind me.
I carried on making the coffee and we were silent for a few minutes. This was hard. He had clammed up again, like he used to when we worked together. He never used to speak to me about Ami back then. Now he was doing the same with Amelia.
Maybe that was his style. Perhaps he just wasn't open about his hurt.
It was none of my business anyway as I put two mugs of steaming hot coffee onto the table and signalled for him to be seated.
"I'm sure Mum must have left something for us to eat in here". I said, now looking in the fridge.
" I'm not very hungry". Came his sullen reply.
I turned to look at him. I should not have been very surprised really, for he had eaten very hartedly at the McDonald's in the Service station earlier, so not even scanning the contents of the fridge I closed it gently.
"Look, I hope you don't mind, but I think I'm going up for a bath". I suggested. " I feel so grimey".
He looked up and smiled. Brilliant white teeth showing from his olive complexion was really quite striking, along with his deeply set pair of dark brown eyes.
How I could not feel the same way about him as I used to was really quite strange. I knew that he was still really very handsome and I did quite like his company but there just wasn't anything there anymore, well not romantically anyway.
"Help yourself to some more coffee, or anything in the fridge, if you do decide that you feel peckish" I said.
Ashcroft nodded his head slowly.
"Or if you want to go on through to the lounge....." I then said, tilting my head towards the third door in the kitchen, situated to the left of where I was standing.
He followed my action with his eyes.
"You could put the television on.....if you like. Relax a little after your long drive. When I come back down I will make us both a bacon butty or something" I said.
" Please, don't fuss. I will be ok" Ashcroft then smiled at me. "Then, when you've finished your bath. I will." he paused, then gave a deep sigh. "I will tell you everything. I will tell you everything about Amelia and I".
I took in a deep breath.
"You don't have to" I answered.
"I want to" He said.
I breathed in.
"And then, I will also tell you about what's been going on with me then. " I announced, figuring that he should at least know of my reasons for his long drive up here to the countryside.
Ashcroft smiled at me as he put the mug of coffee to his lips.
"You really don't have to, you know" He grinned, almost repeating what I had just said to him!
"No, I want to" I smiled back at him.
"Good" he said, now leaning back into the chair, "Because, I can't pretend that I'm not intrigued to know what exactly has been going on"
I smiled at him again, as he now turned to look at me.
"Now go, and get that bath" He demanded.
Lying there neck deep in the warm bubbles of my bath I suddenly felt totally relaxed. As if all troubles from today had totally disintegrated.
I of course knew that it wasn't true, but the fact of the matter was, I still had my very good friends and the support of my family around me. Being here was testament to that!
I mean, at the drop of everything Ashcroft had brought me here to my family and even if they weren't my true family, well what did it matter? They were always going to be there for me.
Alan Rickman had not!
Or was he ever likely to be in the future.
I splashed some warm water over my skin and felt angry inside as I thought about earlier on and how he had just come out and said it, just like that!
Admittedly he was probably going to explain things in a more organised and proper manner probably over a drink, if I hadn't already arranged to meet up with Amelia last night instead.
But to just blurt it out like that anyway was truly unforgivable. Then to add insult to injury he just left me. On my own!
I submerged myself beneath the water wanting to wash away all thoughts and feelings that I had once had for this very accomplished of film actors.
What I couldn't really understand was, why did he want me in this film to play the part of Christina, knowing what we would have to do together and also knowing who I was in relation to him!
I just could not get my head around that at all.
I mean, this was seriously fucked up. But not knowing very much about the film industry or the people within it, maybe this sort of thing was in fact quite normal.
Maybe by running away from it all like this was in fact the best thing for me!
I re-amerged from the water and stroked my hands over my face and then pulled back my hair.
Wow ! That felt good. I felt so much cleaner now and totally refreshed. It was just a pity that nothing could cleanse the inside of my head in quite the same way.
Stepping from out of the bath, I was so pleased that I had at last got rid of all the remnants of make up from my face and I had also heaped on loads of conditioner to my hair, which now felt super smooth and silky once again.
This was a new start for me.
Or maybe an old one!
For I had now decided that I would go back to doing what I felt more than comfortable with. I would do Hugo's play. Really throw myself into it and be the best theatre actress I could be. I also still had my job at Jose's and I really loved that little guy. I had the friendship and the community spirit of all the people around me and so would easily forget about my brief flirtation with the film industry and all those within it.
Yes! I had made up my mind. It wasn't for me and to be honest they really were a very strange bunch indeed.
I gave a deep and satisfying sigh to myself and began to look around for some really nice skin moisturizer. With Sarah staying here, I noticed there was an expensive looking pot in an open wash bag left on the shelf. I peeked inside. She wouldn't mind if I borrowed some, after all she was my sister and Mother had only got cheap and cheerful stuff.
I sat down on the wicker chair in the corner and scooped out a tiny amount. It spread over my body beautifully and I could almost feel the relief from my poor neglected skin as it began to glow and radiate with the sheer pleasure of it.
I added some more and it felt devine, smoothly gliding over my body with a wonderful scented aroma. Rarely had I felt such pleasure as I continued to indulge myself with more and more of the beautiful cream. I then Stroked my legs in an upwards motion and realised just how shapely they had become. It quite surprised me for I had never somehow noticed before.
As my hands glided over them I began to get totally submerged in my own thoughts and imagined a certain pair of big, strong hands gently caressing each leg in turn.
I shook my head suddenly.
What on earth was I thinking!
I then smiled to myself.
Of course I was going to be reminded about the film, for it was also in the script that Jonathan Saunders came and caressed Christina as she stepped from out of a hot bath in one of the scenes.
The whole thing then got very steamy as he continued to kiss her neck and run his hands seductively over the whole of her naked form.
I reached up and began to apply the moisturizer to the upper most part of my body. Over my shoulders, along my arms and then onto my breasts.
My thoughts were now suddenly consumed by that of Alan Rickman and how he would have executed this very beautiful of scenes.
I gave a very deep and elongated sigh.
Oh, how I really wished I could have done those scenes with him. He would have been wonderful I just knew it.
Why did things have to be like they were.
Why did he have to be my fecking father!
I grunted angrily to myself.
I shouldn't be having any such thoughts about him now anyway, but try as I might I just could not get him out of my head, no matter what I did or how hard I tried.
I got up from the chair and carefully replaced the tub back into the bag, knowing that if I carried on with this, I really would not be doing myself any sort of favours at all.
As it was, I had to regain my composure and forget about that man for my own sanity if nothing else.
I couldn't allow myself to ever feel that way about him ever again.
I really had to draw a line right under the whole episode. Down to my very first meeting with him right up to his revelations this morning. Just put it down to experience and leave it where it should be, in the past exactly where it belonged.
Padding across to my parents bedroom, wrapped in just a towel that I had found behind the bathroom door, I knew that I had to dress with a bit more decency if I was to go back downstairs again and rejoin Ashcroft. Seeing the ready made bed, all comfy and extremely inviting, it was more than I could do to not just flop myself into it and fall into a deep and comfortable sleep.
Having not had much the night before, coupled with the long drive, the relaxing bath, heady aroma of the expensive moisturizer, plus this devastating news from Alan, had really worn me out both physically and mentally. It would have been so easy to just climb in there and go straight to sleep. But it wouldn't be fair on anybody, not least on Ashcroft patiently waiting for me downstairs to tell his side of the story about himself and Amelia. Nor would it be fair on my poor Mother and Father, coming home from a lovely night out to see there estranged, demented and totally confusing daughter asleep in their bed!
Talk about Goldilocks!
I smiled to myself as I reached for my Mother's warm, fluffy, white dressing gown that was draped on a chair in the corner of the room. I then slipped it on over my now smooth, cleansed body, piled my damp hair onto the top of my head and held it in place with a couple of hair grips that I had found lying about on the bedside cabinet. I then made my way back downstairs to rejoin Ashcroft in the kitchen but was surprised to see that the room was empty.
I looked around quickly and then presumed that he must have found his way into the lounge.
I was correct. As I entered the room I could see him sat on the sofa, looking down at something. He didn't even glance up as I came towards him which pleased me really, as I knew that he hadn't been pacing around nervously waiting for my return. It was quite obvious that he had clearly made himself at home and was just content to sit and read until I came back.
"That's better". I breezed, going over towards the armchair in the corner, which was usually occupied by my Father.
" I feel a lot more human now". I grinned as I sat down.
"That's good". Ashcroft answered without looking up.
I frowned at him.
He seemed ever so engrossed in what he was reading and I wondered what it was. The only reading material left lying around in my parents home would have been Gardening magazines or Home furnishings. I doubted whether Ashcroft would be interested any of those.
I leaned forward towards him.
" What have you got there?". I asked, but before he had a chance to answer I could now see exactly what it was!
The script!
"Ashcroft!". I exclaimed. " I thought I .................,"
"This is really good". He looked up at me and smiled.
" You've been in my bag!". I said with an alarmed tone to my voice.
"Oh come on Gwen, I didn't go rooting through your personal stuff, I only got this out, besides I just wanted to know more about the story". He then looked under his eyes at me.
" Pretty racy stuff, if you don't mind me saying so. You wouldn't find this in the theatre".
"Give it here". I snapped, reaching across to try and grab it from him.
But he moved his hand away so I was prevented from doing so.
" Aw, don't be a spoil sport". He grinned. "I'm really loving this, anyway it beats just sitting in here looking at all these old photos of you, as interesting as they are".
I followed his gaze as his eyes switched to the large array of framed photographs dotted around the room of me with my sister as children. I had quite forgotten how many were actually in here but with my Mother being quite keen with the camera, I really shouldn't have been surprised.
I sucked in a breath.
" Oh, no quite embarrassing really". I mumbled, now looking down.
"Yeah, a bit". Ashcroft agreed.
" Well, that's my Mother for you, always ready with a camera". I sighed.
Ashcroft placed his hands over the script and leant back on the sofa.
"I don't think my parents have any pictures of me on their walls. Certainly none of me as a child that's for sure". He said.
I frowned at him in disbelief.
" What? Not even one?". I asked.
Ashcroft shook his head, then smiled at me rather ruefully, before adding:
" Far too ugly you see".
I rolled my eyes at him and now it was my turn to shake my head. Ashcroft Jennings may be a lot of things, but ugly he most certainly was not!
My mind then went back, momentarily to my childhood and the numerous amount of times that Mother had picked up a camera and demanded that me and Sarah smile at her, even when we didn't really want to.
Then the glee on my Mother's face when the photos had been developed as she flicked through them for the first time and her sheer excitement as she decided which ones she wanted to put into frames and have on display about the place.
This was a normal part of growing up for us, always having our picture taken. I know that Mum has many, many photo albums stashed away somewhere too.
"Didn't your parents ever take photos then?". I asked him.
He shrugged his shoulders.
" Some, but you see, they didn't have any pictures of me when I was younger because I wasn't with them".
"Wasn't with them? What are you going on about?". I asked, totally confused by what he was saying.
Ashcroft smiled at me, noticing my confusion.
" I was adopted ". He said.
"Adopted!" I shrieked. "I never knew that!"
"Its no big secret, but , yes I am" He nodded his head in confirmation before giving a big sigh.
" But enough about me". He said, picking up the script once again, "We have more important things to discuss............ Like this for example"
I stared at him as he continued to wave it in the air in front of me.
"This is a masterpiece of writing!" He exclaimed. " It's absolutely riveting "
I lowered my head.
" I know..........its so good, isn't it?. It's just a shame I just can't do it anymore". I replied sadly.
I then gave a quiet sigh and held my arms around myself, trying to give some comfort for the way in which Ashcroft continued to roughly handle the pages.
" Well there's certainly a lot of sexual goings on in this and I mean a lot! Did you realise that?, you know, when you took it on. Did you actually know what you were getting involved with? ". He asked, without looking up.
I nodded my head in answer, but he didn't see. He was far more interested in flicking through the already well thumbed pages.
I winced and held myself a little tighter.
"Blimey Gwen, the main character has some serious kit removing scenes as well! It seems that she'd do it anywhere! Totally obsessed with the older guy. Lucky sod!". He went on.
I shuffled uneasily and was quite unable to look up as I continued to hear the flicking of the pages.
" And what a twist to the ending too". He continued.
I suddenly snapped my head up and stared at him.
"You've........ You've read it all?". I asked, my voice a mere croak.
" Right to the end?".
"Yes......". He answered glancing up, " The very end".
"Oh, I see". I said quietly.
Ashcroft continued to turn the pages.
" You must have read it very fast". I then sighed.
"Oh, I only read the juicy bits". He answered without looking up again, " I'm not really much of a reader myself, I just wanted to see what it was all about. I had heard it was pretty racy".
He paused for a second, then tilted his head up to look up at me.
"Seems as if I wasn't disappointed". He then added, raising his eyebrows.
I sighed inwardly.
Amelia! I thought to myself. Amelia must have told him!
" And you're going to give this up?". He now asked. "Give up what I would suspect would be a pretty awesome movie!".
"I have to". I spoke quietly.
" Yeah, you said". Ashcroft nodded, then suddenly snapped shut the script with a hefty slam.
"So? Are you going to tell me why then?". He asked.
I swallowed hard. This was it. I was now going to have to tell him all about what had happened this morning. I felt that I owed it to him, after all he did come to my rescue.
So I cleared my throat and watched as he looked at me in anticipation. His deep dark set eyes were almost boring holes into my very soul and I now knew that there was no doubt that I had absolutely his full attention.
" Well". I began, as I took a deep breath. "You see, I fell in love".
" In love". He repeated slowly.
I nodded my head at him as I became very aware of the twisting of my fingers on my lap. A nervous affliction to what I was about to reveal to him.
"I couldn't help it". I said, trying to defend myself.
" It just sort of happened. I suppose, I still don't really know if it is actually love or not, but it certainly feels bloody well like it".
Ashcroft nodded, knowingly.
"Are you sure that it's not just history repeating itself again? After all you have felt this way before, do you remember? Since then you admitted that it was all just fantasies made up inside your head" He said.
"Are you talking about how I felt about you? Because if you are, this is nothing like that was! It's totally different let me tell you!". I snapped, feeling humiliated by the way he had just so flippantly brought that into the conversation again!
" OK, ok....... I'll back off". Ashcroft cried, holding his hands up in defense. "Just wanted you to be sure, that's all".
I crossed my arms angrily across my chest.
" Anyway". I continued to snap, "That was a long time ago. Ancient history in fact. We have both moved on since then, well I certainly have!".
Ashcroft grinned at me, almost playfully, as if he didn't quite believe what I was saying to him.
I then took in another breath.
" And just so you know, this man is older, more mature and much more understanding, alright?". I said in defiance.
"Point taken". Ashcroft nodded, the smile now disappearing from his face.
" Right then". I said, readjusting my position in my Father's armchair. "I'll start at the beginning then". I said, nervously.
Ashcroft's dark eyes searched the whole of my face as I took in another deep breath.
"I got offered the part of Christina Greebe". I went on, almost too quickly. " By Alan Rickman, you know the film star".
I watched as Ashcroft's mouth gaped open, then he shook his head briefly, following that by a very raucous laugh.
Frowning at him, I felt quite humiliated just why he should think it was so funny.
But I carried on with my explanation, regardless.
"I went for the screen test, got the part and started filming almost immediately". I added.
Ashcroft had now stopped laughing and was now eyeing me with a certain amount of disbelief.
" Wait a minute ". He said, holding up a hand.
" You got talent spotted by.........Alan Rickman? The actor? right?"
"Yes". I answered. " I just said, didn't I?".
" And you also play the part of this.........this.....Christina Greebe character. The one who..........who gets to do all the sex scenes with this older guy?". Ashcroft asked very hesitantly.
I took in a deep, deliberate breath.
"Yes". I answered again.
Ashcroft shook his head.
" I don't know which I find harder to believe. You having been picked out by Alan Rickman or the fact that you're getting your kit off? Is that why you've now decided not to do it anymore? Had you not realised what you were letting yourself in for? Didn't you just get cold feet?". He asked.
I shook my head.
For I knew that wasn't the reason at all. Truth be told, I was rather looking forward to those scenes with Alan, I really was.
I suppose I was very curious about him.
My thoughts had now turned back to the film star with the expressive eyes, the deep voice and the gentleness of his character.
I also felt a deep sadness from within at the realisation that I would not have those scenes with him now, to look forward to.
Feeling his strong arms around me again, the powerfulness of his loving embrace, the sensuality of his tender kiss.
My heart began to flutter with excitement inside my chest, as I found myself now touching my lips with my finger tips.
"So if you're playing this Christina........whatever her name is". Ashcroft said, interrupting my thoughts.
"Who's playing her love interest then?". He asked.
I blinked at him for a moment as I tried to readjust myself back into the real world once again.
Gosh I was doing that a lot this evening, drifting away with my thoughts of Alan!
Christ I was really going to miss him, that was so obvious!
Ashcroft then started to laugh. He must have been slightly amused by my far away look, but as I studied him some more, I could see that he wasn't even looking at me.
He was now leaning forward, his hands clasped together over the top of the script, creasing some of the pages somewhat and even though he was laughing, he appeared to be frustrated about something, maybe even angry.
He took in a breath, then without looking at me, he then asked:
" It's not Jeremiah Johnston is it? You're love interest in the film. It's not him?".
"No". I smiled. " It's not.........thank goodness".
Ashcroft nodded his head as if somehow satisfied, which I found quite odd, to only then look up at me, moments later with a pained, horrified expression upon his handsome face, before asking:
"Oh dear God! It's not him who you've fallen for is it? Please tell me it's not him!".
I frowned. This was very strange behavior from Ashcroft. Very strange indeed and anyway, how did he even know that Jeremiah was even in the film!
Amelia again! I suddenly thought.
Gosh, she must have told Ashcroft nearly everything. Everything, but who I had actually fallen for.
" Well?". Ashcroft persisted. "Is it him?".
" No". I said shaking my head "Most certainly not! Look, did Amelia tell you everything about all of this?".
" Amelia?". Ashcroft asked, with a confused look.
"No, not at all. Amelia didn't say a word to me about anything".
" Nothing?". I asked, "Only she told me that she wasn't a big fan of Jeremiah Johnson either! It does sound to me as if you both dislike him for some reason or another".
Ashcroft shook his head.
" Purely coincidental, that's all". He shrugged.
"Then how do you know about him starring in the film then? And how did you hear about it being racy?".
Ashcroft breathed heavily and squeezed at the script so hard in his hands, I thought that he was about to break it in half.
I looked on horrified at his actions to my precious script, before he then, thankfully relaxed his hands, took a deep breath and then smiled.
" I.....just know these things, that's all". He said. "Nothing for you to worry about".
I frowned at him as he gave a big sigh, then quickly changing the subject hurriedly said:
" I'm getting a bit hungry now to be honest, so where's that bacon sandwich you promised me?".
He then leaned over towards me and gave me one of his infamous Ashcroft Jennings winks that used to really melt my heart.
This time though, it did not and I just continued to give him a look of suspicion.
Something wasn't adding up here at all. This seemed highly irregular and with Amelia's hatred towards Jeremiah Johnston still prevalent in my head, I knew there was more to this than Ashcroft was letting on.