"I'm nervous" Riley said as he adjusted his shirt for the thirtieth time.
"You don't have to be" I assured him
We were outside my mom's room door in the hospital. You'd think after I told Riley about my dark past yesterday, he'd judge me and stay away from me or even report us to the police.
To my surprise, he didn't. I almost jumped in shock when he told me he wanted to meet my mom even after all the things I told him.
This morning, I told my dad everything, how Riley read my diary and the fact that I've told Riley all about us.
He gave us permission to go see my mom. He even suggested we skip school so we can have more time to spend.
Yup, my dad deserves the "best father of the year" award
For the first time in my life, I saw Riley in a button up shirt and boy did he rock the corporate look well. He paired it with skinny jeans and matching sneakers. He even combed his hair back neatly.
He usually wore casual T Shirts with jeans or shorts, you know that 'I don't care about how I look but 'I'm still hot no matter what I wear' kind of thing but he actually put in effort in dressing up today.
The thought made my heart flutter that he cared about seeing my mom and he cared about impressing her.
He's probably serious about us
He arranged the bouquet of flowers that he bought from a florist shop on our way here.
"What if she doesn't like me?"
I chuckled
"She's mentally unstable. I doubt she knows the difference between like and hate anymore"
"What if she thinks I'm not good enough for you"
No offence but is he really bothered about what a psycho woman thinks?
"She can't think that"
"If she... "
I silenced him by bringing his lips to mine. He cupped my face lovingly in his hands and kissed me back deeply.
"You talk too much" I whispered
"I.... "
"She'll love you, I promise"
I held his hand and we entered the room together.
My mom was sitting on the chair by the window, reading on her crossed legs
"Hey mom" I greeted walking over to her
"Hi sweetie"
She got up and kissed my forehead
"And who is this handsome young man" she beamed at Riley
"Mom!"
"What? Its not everyday my daughter brings a hottie like this to come see me. I haven't seen a guy as cute as you in years. I need to get out more"
It wasn't really funny but Riley and I laughed lightly. Thanks mom, you just broke the ice.
"What's your name darling?" She asked him
"Riley"
"Samantha's boyfriend, I assume?"
"Yes ma'am"
I blushed. Does this mean we're official now?
"That's lovely"
"These are for you ma'am" he handed her the flowers
My mom looked like she's just seen an angel.
"Handsome and manners" she wiped fake tears "Bless your parents"
The door opened revealing my dad and Jasmine.
"Hey" Jasmine said
"Thought it'll be nice to have a family reunion" my dad said
My mom screamed in delight and went to hug my dad. They stood there, holding each other tightly for a while. It's been such a long time since they've seen each other. Holding and hugging turned into kissing. I almost shed a tear. It was the cutest thing ever.
"What about me?" Jasmine asked.
My mum hugged her as well and started crying hysterically.
"Thank you so much" Ann sobbed "It means a lot to me"
We all cried too. My dad hugged them both.
"Group hug" I cried as I went to join them.
Riley stood there smiling at us
"Hey, come here" my dad invited him
"Yeah" Jasmine added "you're family too"
"Come on" my mom urged
I beckoned him to come over as well.
I could swear I saw a tear in his eyes as he walked over and wrapped his arms around us.
Riley
I cried silently as I washed my hands in the bathroom.
I used here as an excuse so I could cry in peace.
Never in my life have I felt so loved as I did a few minutes ago, even if it was just for a moment.
Jade is gradually changing my life for the better
I think I love her
Nothing to think about. I do love her. I smiled to myself as the realization hit me.
I'm in love with Samantha Jones
I have to tell her. Tonight
Maybe life isn't that bad.
I rolled up my sleeve to look at the razor cuts on my hands as a result of self harm.
Maybe life is worth living for Jade
Maybe I should re consider committing suicide.
The opening of the door brought me out of my thoughts.
It was a lady dressed up in a nurse uniform. Her face looked oddly familiar but I couldn't place my finger on it.
Where have I met her?
"I had to double check to make sure it was you" she licked her lips "What an Adonis you've grown into. I wish I was still babysitting you"
No. It can't be
"Can't recognize me?" She smirked
"N- Nancy"
"Bingo"
She walked slowly towards me while I backed away in fright till my back hit the wall.
It's confusing how I would be scared of a woman at my age. You don't know what this woman has done to me. She's my childhood nightmare. She's the reason why I'm the way I am. It feels like I'm eight years old again and she still has power over me.
"Leave me alone please" I begged
She knew the effect she had on me and she planned on using it to her satisfaction.
"Why should I?"
She ran her hands round my chest down to my stomach till she got to my crotch.
"Hmm" She whispered in my ear "I bet its much bigger now, huh?"
I closed my eyes hoping she was just a dream and she would disappear
I tried so hard to push her away but my body wouldn't cooperate. It's like I was frozen.
All the memories came crashing back to me.
All the times she basically raped me just so I could sleep
All the times I would beg my mom not to go out so she wouldn't come over
"Stop!" I screamed
Someone was banging on the bathroom door.
She brought out a piece of paper from her bra and put it in my pockets
"Call me" she winked
She unlocked the door and went outside.
I held the sink to balance myself in an attempt to catch my breath. If not, I might lose my balance and pass out.
My heart is beating fast. Its like my insides are about to explode
The world around me is spinning and I'm breathing heavily
Panic attack
I haven't had that in years
A man walked in and stared at me
"Everything alright?"
I nodded
He stood there for a while
"You sure, you're okay?"
"Yes thanks"
That is one of the greatest lies I have ever told
No, I am not okay
I never will be