Got a secret, can you keep it? Swear, this one you'll save
Better lock it in your pocket, takin' this one to the grave
If I show you, then I know you won't tell what I said
'Cause two can keep a secret if one of them is dead
Secret- The Pierces
Bonnie had three secrets she would take with her to the grave.
The first; she went back to the Prison World often. The one Kai was currently chained in.
But, maybe she should clarify. She didn't see Kai when she went back but instead utilized the benefits of a completely empty world. As it turned out, having a place that had literally two inhabits sometimes came in handy that only she could access.
At the start, she'd gone there once out of desperation. She'd been preparing a spell that, if done wrong, could have blown up a small town. She herself was protected, but her strengths didn't extend the entirety of the area. So, she figured, if something was going to go nuclear, she should be a place where no one would be hurt.
It hadn't happened, by the way; the spell had gone off without a hitch.
But once was all it took for Bonnie to realize this world had a lot of uses.
After that first time, she always rationalized going back. She would argue with herself in her bed for hours, sitting awake, before finally buckling and pulling out the ascendant. For example, when her favorite bakery in DC closed down, she knew where she could find more than a dozen of those tantalizing donuts sitting out, forever untouched. Or, when little Josie lost her favorite stuffed toy that even magic couldn't find, and a new unicorn from the store just wouldn't do, Bonnie popped back to find a unicorn that looked and smelled like the lost one and gained an 'IOU' from both Alaric and Caroline. And, how could she pass up helping Damon get a ring for Elena since he no longer could just compel someone when Tiffany's and Co would never notice a nice one lost from an inventory since there was no one to count it? Elena, she told herself as she perused the glittering diamonds, deserved a nice ring after all the strife in her life. She deserved a normal, non-exciting human existence with Damon.
After a while, the problem was, she starting leaning back on it more and more until she would shift back and forth once a week. As far as her friends were concerned, she'd only been there two times. Damon had no problem with her sacking the Prison World for a ring, and when Kai was brought up as also being there (the reason the world was there), he just scoffed.
"Even as a human, I could take on that punk," He'd dismissed the thought.
Caroline had been against it at first, but she'd been so stressed by the end of three days of Josie adamantly refusing to do anything until she was reunited with her friend, she caved. She would disapprove if she knew Bonnie went there for a ring or for something as mundane as doughnuts, but Bonnie didn't have to tell Caroline anything.
The truth of the matter was that Bonnie found herself in the Prison World a lot.
Need some peace and quiet? Poof.
Have a spell that needs to be done uninterrupted and sit untouched for three weeks? Poof.
Need something that existed prior to the creation of the world? Poof.
She wondered if it often made her a terrible person for popping back and forth to lift textbooks or clothes or movies from the world, but it's not like anyone was using those anyway. Plus, she always told herself, she would be buying them if she had the money for it. Which, she didn't, not currently. She always told herself that her constant usage of the Prison World was a temporary thing. One day she'd outgrow it.
Yet, in the recesses of her mind, she knew that the moment she had popped back here without a second thought, she had started sliding down a slope that she couldn't claw her way out of.
Every time she went, she knew the risk of letting Kai out. She that if he managed to get free from his chains, if he could find any hospital, if he found her one of these times...well, Kai would stop at nothing to regain access to society. He'd already proven that once.
But, as the years went on, she became more confident that he was desiccated, so the threat was slipping away more and more. And that should have been it. That should have been the extent that Bonnie thought about Kai. But it wasn't.
That was her second secret.
Bonnie thought of Kai almost as often as she thought about the Prison World. When she was back in the world, it was like in the back of her mind, he was always there, mentally. Magically, she could feel his presence there as a secondary magical being. If she could feel him, she was absolutely sure that Kai could feel her. She thought sometimes she could feel him feeling her, she could almost reach out and tug on that desperation that Kai felt, that utter dark need.
Magic was complicated. Magic was selfish. Magic was not biased. Magic did things to better the magic.
And the fact that two witches, the last of their covens (because while Alaric's twins were Jo's, they weren't really Geminis, even if they were twins), existed out there that brushed close enough to feel each other's magical signature often, but never touched- two ships in the night- was driving magic crazy.
Nevermind the fact that one was a murderer who had done unspeakable things. Nevermind the fact that Kai would sooner kill Bonnie over anything else. Nevermind the fact Bonnie would sooner kill Kai.
As far as the magic was concerned, they'd been attracted to each other, once. And even if they hadn't been, maybe it wouldn't have cared.
Magic did what magic did.
And the magic currently? It was tugging Bonnie back to Kai as hard as it could, and Bonnie was resisting it every moment. The first time she'd felt the urge settle in her bones, she'd popped away, thinking it was the proximity of existing in the world. Apparently, that didn't matter, so Bonnie continued to return.
This led Bonnie to her third secret; the one, that above all, she couldn't let anyone know:
Bonnie wanted to fuck Kai.
Maybe it was the magic, she told herself, maybe it was the magic that made her feel things for him. However, she doubted it, since this secret had taken hold of her the moment she saw him years ago. She'd battled this urge for years, frankly.
Liking Kai and wanting to jump his bones were two very different things. When she told Kai she'd never like him, that much was true. She'd heard great things about hatefucking someone, though.
And whatever it was, magic, some perverted urge, the fact she hadn't been laid in ages, or plain old hormones...Bonnie was finding the pull to where Kai was harder and harder to resist.
She would find herself drawing closer each time, each jump into this world she'd go a step closer to where he still was. To town, to the square, to the street, to a store down, and finally now...pacing outside of the door.
She could still hear Spin Doctors blasting, which told her pretty concretely Kai was still trapped since she knew the first thing he would do when he broke free would have been to smash every Spin Doctor's track into oblivion.
"Okay, I'm here," Bonnie said out loud to no one, "What more do you want?"
She shouldn't have asked; she knew well enough. Magic wanted to continue. Magic wanted people to be able to wield magic. Magic wanted covens to create new little witches to teach the craft to. The continuation was well enough understood from there.
When Bonnie had had this realization, she'd laughed. Did it know that Kai was a vampire now? Did it know that he was sterile?
And yet...he was also a heretic.
Years ago, she would have figured that magic was just stupid. And then, something impossible happened, Klaus had a kid.
So, maybe it didn't matter if you were a vampire? Maybe if you were half-vampire, half-anything alive you could procreate. And, if Bonnie thought about it, she knew magic wasn't stupid. Magic saw all. It saw Kai and his, erm, fatherly abilities.
So, the fact that Bonnie knew eventually this magic pull would break her down, bring her to him should have completely terrified her, all things considering. It didn't. What did scare her was knowing this and realizing she wasn't scared.
Bonnie wanted kids. That wasn't the problem. She might not want them now, but yeah, she wanted one or two eventually.
Did she want them with Kai? Her answer should have been a firm, resounding 'hell no'. Should have been.
She didn't think he would ever be the father of the year, granted. But, one night in which the magic felt like it was clawing her, digging deep into her and dragging her to him, she wondered if she raised a kid alone, just had him father it, that would suffice?
She was confident in her abilities to raise a kid. She felt like she'd been raising her two best friends since they were in kindergarten, and she was great with Lizzy and Josie. Plus, she often imagined how utterly powerful this kid would be, or kids, since Geminis had their thing for twins. Lizzie and Josie were pretty damn powerful and their father was completely human, his adventure as a vampire nonwithstanding.
But to have a kid born of the last Bennet Blood and the leader of the Gemini Coven?
Hell, no wonder the magic was so bound determined to get them together. If Bonnie were talking this over with her friends, she might liken magic to that annoying match-maker friend that always conveniently locked two kids together in closets at parties, waiting for something to happen. Except Bonnie and Kai weren't fumbling teenagers and the stakes wasn't an awkward kiss. It was a freaking baby.
She could do this thought. She was nearly 26. Even so, it would be maybe...what? One more year of fending off this magic before she broke anyway? One more year of feeling persistently hot and bothered and arguing with a force beyond her own power? One more year of not really feeling satisfied after Netflix and Chill with some attractive enough guy from Tindr whose only problem was he was not Malachi Parker? Yeah, no. Bonnie would rather do it now.
Bonnie took a deep breath in. She tried to wait until her heartbeat slowed, but that was pretty unrealistic, given the situation. She imagined what her friends' responses would have been if she told them about this. About how she wanted to sleep with Kai. About how 'magic' wanted to have a kid. About all of it.
Elena: Condoms are a thing, you know?
Caroline: Kids are great Bonnie, but not with a murdering maniac. Are you crazy? You'll regret it. I'm just looking out for you.
Condoms were a thing, yeah, but magic would keep going until she was knocked up. In fact, it would probably only get worse. And yes, Caroline, she'd say, she was crazy.
She flipped open her compact mirror, checking her makeup. She spritzed herself once more with perfume; the same stuff she'd been wearing when she was trapped the first time, just because. Kai seemed like the sort that would appreciate the sentimental effort.
She went through the plan in her head. She'd wake him up, carefully. She'd keep him chained. She'd do the dirty things to him that she'd been dreaming about.
Kai might be mad at first that he wasn't releasing her, but hey, in return he got laid. If he was like any other guy she figured he wouldn't be able to resist her proposition.
And afterward, because she was pretty much banking on the fact this would be a one and done thing, she'd go home...act really surprised when a test came back positive, tell her friends it was a one-night stand, have the kid and, well, that was it. It was actually quite a simple plan if she took away a lot of the mush in between. Scarily simple.
She could feel Kai's energy spiking out around her, as though he could feel how close she was...that she was inches away from him, just a door between them.
She pushed open the door.
Kai was fairly dessicated at this point, but she saw his eyes flicker to her as soon as she opened. If Kai could move his lips into a smirk, he totally would have been. The thing was that he didn't seem shocked to see her. Maybe her weeks of nearly approaching this place had been able to reach him.
The first thing Bonnie did was go to the jukebox; partially to torture Kai, pretend like she was just here to piss him off more, but also because Bonnie Bennet would not fuck anyone with that in the background. It was really getting to her too. She stopped it, considering if she wanted to change it to a different tune. She told herself she wasn't here to romance Kai, however. She knew he got it up from just being around her, she had ample evidence of that, and this wasn't a lover's call, this was something else.
So, no music.
Bonnie pulled out a blood bag from her purse, twisting the cap off and dribbling it into his lips. After that, it didn't take long for the color to return to his face, to everywhere. She watched as he hungrily devoured it.
"Another?" He asked once it was shriveled and empty. His voice was rough, it sounded sexy.
"Once we're done here," Bonnie pulled out two more bags to show she wasn't tricking him. He struggled against the chains, baring his teeth, "You weren't strong enough then, you're for sure not strong enough now."
Kai realized this, scowling, "Well, it would be better if it came right from the source, of course..." He said, eyeing in on her neck.
"Fat fucking chance," Bonnie snorted, "Well, maybe if you're a good boy." Her voice dropped an octave, teasing. Kai locked his jaw, letting out a snort.
"Right, right. Magic wants a mini-Parker."
So, Kai knew. Well, Kai had all the time in the world to consider it, so of course, Kai knew.
"Bennett," Bonnie corrected, "A mini Bennett." No way in hell was she giving her kid his last name, not when she was going to be raising it and Kai wasn't getting near it.
"If you, ah, untie my hands, we could get going," Kai offered.
"I think we'll manage without," Bonnie said, as she began to unbutton her coat. She had a feeling he also already knew this; she was already ready to go without much of anything.
"Ah, yes, this is your kink, isn't it?" Kai rattled the chains, "You were just too much of a coward to admit it last time."
Bonnie got to the last button, "Are you going to let me do this, Kai? Because I'll walk right out of here. I'll put Spin Doctors right back on and never look back."
It was a bluff. She knew she couldn't resist the pull.
Kai weighed his options; she could see it on his face. He knew a lot, but he hadn't had time to think about this happening. To make it seem real, she reached for the blood bags as she re-did a button.
"Wait," Kai jerked against his confides, "Arg, shit. Whatever."
"Is that how a good boy would respond?" Bonnie got inches away from him without ever touching. Kai leaned forward, so close to her, but just the slightest bit too far from her, "What do you say, Kai?"
"Ravish me, Bon?" He said, and Bonnie leaned down, brushing his lips.
"Good enough."