"You're on in five." A small white lady with blonde slick back hair and a headset says to me. I drink nearly half the bottle of water and hand it back to Emil who I have yet to look at today. Even though we spent the taxi ride to and from the airport together, as well as the five hour plane ride to Atlanta. The energy from the crowd is unmatched. It completely shifts my mood and there is no place else I'd rather be. Music has a way of doing that or doing the complete opposite. You either block everything out and go as hard as you possibly can or you let your problems consume you and give an emotional set that drives goosebumps on the audience's arm.
The intro to the very leaked tape that seems to be dominating my life and friendships come on. If only the audience knew how much stress and pain this one tape is causing me. They think they do but do they?
Every time I perform the songs I am placed right back in that hurtful situation. They like it because it's familiar to them. They've been hurt possibly worse than I have, they know the lyrics. Their heart knows the lyrics. They scream them back at me at the top of their lungs. I get on my knees in front of them and bare my heart on the stage, sweat pouring down my face, my heart beating out of my chest.
Finally, someone has put their feelings into words. Finally a man has spoken out about being hurt in a way that men usually don't. That's what made the tape so impactful. That's what has gotten it Gold in a month. This is the life I've always wanted, does it matter that I got it like this?
I step off the stage sweaty with little to no voice, grab a towel and another bottle of water and head to my dressing room back stage to cool off in the amazing air conditioned room.
I miss her.
I haven't seen my baby girl in a few days and she was all I wanted. I look through my texts, the last she said was " Kill it." I hit the call button and it rings out.
Chanel mentioned she would be with Mac this evening. Slight jealousy interrupts my thoughts but I dismiss them.
There is a small knock on my door.
"Prodigy?" A small voice says.
"...Yea. Who that?" I question.
The door opens and two very attractive girls enter my dressing room and close the door behind them. One brown skin with large breasts and a curvy figure. Her top is unbuttoned to where her breasts connect and her leather beige skirt hugs her body like it is painted on. Her long black weave sweeps down to her stomach. Her friend next to her has curly black hair and is lighter skinned, she looks Latina. Her tight Nude dress hugs her slender body as well.
"Prodigy! So nice to meet you. Wow, you're much cuter in person." The one brown skin ones says in a slightly seductive tone. Her voice is soft and calling. It doesn't phase me. Maybe back in the day it would have.
" How did y'all get back here? I ain't plan no meet and greet tonight." I say looking at both of them confused.
They suddenly look offended. The lighter skinned one looks at her friend and then back to me.
"What?" She says with a hard attitude. "We opened for you. We're the duo... Coca-Yeena?" The lighter one says.
I immediately feel bad, I do remember being told I had openers but I never got to check and see who they were. I hadn't heard of the group before, they must have been local artists.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't know. My mind has been all over the place." I stick my hand out.
"Prodigy." I introduce.
"We know who you are. I'm Coca." The brown skinned one with the long black hair says. She smiles as her attitude begins to fade.
"Ahh, then you must be Yeena." I say turning to the light skinned curly haired friend.
She laughs. "Yes, that is my stage name but call me, Mena."
"Nice to meet you Coca and Mena. Your stage name means cocaine, no?" I question.
They nod.
"Yes, we are just as addicting." Coca smiles deviously.
I chuckle.
"I'm sorry I didn't get to see you girls perform." I apologize. "How did it go?"
"Great, you should definitely check out our music sometime. It's a mix of trap Spanish, rap and RnB. No one is like us." Coca says.
"I will check it out as a matter of fact. You're both Spanish?" I question.
"Yea, I'm Puerto Rican and Coca is Dominican and Black." Mena answers.
"That's dope. Well you're both gorgeous, can't wait to listen." I smile and wipe my face and forehead with my towel.
"Actually, can we get a picture with you." Mena asks.
"Yea, of course." I say standing to my feet and straightening my shirt.
"Wait, let me get someone to take it." Coca says running out of the room quickly. She comes back with Emil.
"I loved your set, you girls were great." Emil compliments as he adjusts Coca's phone landscape to take the photo.
I stand in the middle and both girls pose up against me. Coca rests her hand on my stomach and brings her face close to mine, her breasts pressing on my arm. Mena's finger plays with my ear. I smile awkward and uncomfortable.
"I don't know, lets do another one a little less closer. Don't want this to be an issue with my girl or the press." I say as nicely as I can.
"It's no big deal! Our image is very sexy, that's how we take pictures with everyone we meet." Mena laughs.
"Yea, don't be so paranoid." Coca says.
"Nah, one more." I say sternly. I look to Emil. "One more, Em." I say.
The girls roll their eyes, smiles still present on their faces. This time they are further away from me. My face remains neutral.
The phone makes a snapping sound.
"That's the one." I say after the flash.
"Thank you so much. It was nice meeting you." The girls say their goodbyes but seem reluctant to exit the room. As they turn to go, I can see Emil struggling with himself.
"Wait, why leave so soon? You girls don't want to hangout for a little, maybe drink and do some cocaina." Emil jokes.
"I'm kidding, I don't do that." He finishes. He looks at me and I give him a death stare.
"I don't know man, I'm a little tired." I say trying to hide my frustration with him. I rub the back of my neck and the girls immediately start chirping.
"One drink." Mena says.
"Just one drink! Please party pooper Prodigy." Coca says, her dimples peaking out from her cheeks as she pouts. I look at Emil who is completely infatuated with Mena. They haven't stopped looking at each other since he came in the room.
I owe Emil nothing at all. But I haven't seen him with a girl in ages. Maybe if he had a girl back then, he would have been too occupied to leak my entire fucking love story without thought. Niggas need something to do. A job, a task, a woman, I don't care.
"One drink." I say putting up my index finger.
"Woohoo! Issa party." Coca screams.
"No, it's really not." I say taking a seat by the small bar prepared for us.
Coca makes a face at my solemn reply. The girls and Emil pull up their chairs and sit beside me at the makeshift bar. Emil on the side, next to Mena. Mena next to Coca and Coca next to me, of course.
Before us sits a bucket of ice with a large bottle of Hennessy, a 2 liter container of cranberry juice and a bottle of Patron.
"Pick your poison." Emil smiles. He speaks to all of us but he only looks at Mena. His eyes raid her body and I don't understand how she isn't the least bit offended when he glances at her breasts for a second too long.
Mena chuckles. "Patron all the way." She says.
"Then Patron it is." Emil replies, grabbing a glass and pouring more than a shots worth.
I've never seen this nigga so charming in my life. He actually has game, this was news to me. I'm thinking maybe even though I don't want to be here that Emil can entertain me with this new personality cause I sincerely don't know who the fuck he is right now.
"What you drinking?" I ask Coca in an uninterested and way less enthusiastic tone than Emil
Coca's face is serious as she looks at me.
"Patron." She says with a tight mouth.
I pour it for her and then open the bottle of cranberry. I don't get to pour any before she stops me.
"Eh, eh. I drink it straight." She says in that quiet and seductive tone again.
"Aight." I respond uninterested.
A girl who drinks her liquor straight. Again, it might have impressed me back in the day but right now it just made me concerned.
"On the rocks." Coca adds.
"The ice right there." I say pointing to the bucket.
Coca rolls her eyes, grunts and gets the ice herself. She takes a sip and clears her throat. Mena and Emil are off into their own conversation and it's clear that they probably won't be returning to the group discussion ever again.
"So, what's your problem?" Coca questions salty.
"No problems here. Just missing somebody and a bit tired." I admit. "Sorry for being uninviting. This isn't really my scene anymore. You know? I did all this before." I say.
"You've done all what before?" Coca asks.
"Just chillin with girls, messing around after shows, drinking, smashin."
"Woah woah. None of that is happening here. We just wanted to hang." Coca protests.
"I know, I was just saying what happened in the past." I assure her. "I know y'all not like that."
I didn't know. They probably were like that. Mena is halfway there already and if I was more welcoming, Coca probably would be halfway there too. The low mumble of Emil and Mena's side conversation is filled with giggles and whispers. I pour myself a shot of Henny and shoot it back.
"Soo.." Coca's nicely done nails circle the top of her glass. "Who do you miss?" She questions.
I look at the ice in the bucket.
"My girl. Sure you know her." I admit, honestly.
"Chanel?" Coca asks.
"That's the one." I say lightly. Her name alone brings me joy.
Let's talk about her, let's talk about that. Let's talk about my baby. The reason I'm so happy when I'm in LA, the reason i'm so down when I'm not. Her body curled up in mine. Because holding her while I sleep fixes all. Because kissing her clears my mind, because hearing her speak brings me focus.
"How have y'all been?" Coca questions.
But someone always wants information worth sharing. People always want a secret they can go back and discuss.
"We're great." I nod my head and end the conversation.
I take another shot of Henny and my body suddenly feels exhausted. The travel and show were finally catching up to me.
"Have you girls ever kissed each other or anything like that?" Emil questions like an old pervert.
They both laugh and fan him away.
"Oh, you would love that story, huh?" Coca taunts.
"Yes, I would. Very much." Emil answers casually.
The three of them laugh again and another question is asked that sends them laughing over the edge but I can't hear it because my phone begins ringing.
I check the caller ID, happy to see Chanel's name spread across the screen with a few heart emojis. I stand up quickly and walk out of the dressing room, the door closing behind me.
I pick up.
"Is that my baby girl?" I answer, a large smiling spreading across my face.
"Babyyy!" She sings, happy. Hearing her voice really settles demons.
"I miss you real bad. Got a nigga out here homesick and it's only been a few days." I chuckle.
She laughs. "I miss you too baby, so much. How did the show go?"
"Great. Was a good show. They loved the set list." I answer.
"Oh, the set list I just happened to organize? Thank you, I'm genius." She gloats.
"Yea, yea. See, this why I don't ask for your help with anything. All this showing off going on right here." I say jokingly.
"Can't help that I'm just naturally gifted in certain areas. It's my-"
The room door opens and it's Coca.
"Hey, you comin back? They making out in there, it's awkward." She whines.
I try to cover the speaker but it's too late. The other line is quiet.
I motion for Coca to leave me the hell alone and she heads back inside.
"Where are you and who is that?" Chanel questions. An edge to her voice.
"I'm still at the venue and that was one of the girls who opened up for me. Emil likes her friend and they wanted to have a drink." I tell the full truth. Nothing more and nothing less. I learned my lesson from last time, easily.
"It's late. I don't think it's appropriate to be drinking with girls right now. Emil can do that on his own time by himself. You go to your hotel and actually get some rest." She says stern.
"You're 100% right. I'll do just that, right now." I say giving in effortlessly.
It's quiet on the line again.
"Baby?" I mumble into the phone.
"I don't like shit like that Trev, I don't. If I was drinking and having fun after a show with the men I just performed with, you wouldn't be too happy." Chanel sounds hurt.
"I agree 1000%, I'm actually not having any fun at all. I'll shut it down right now and head to the hotel." I say going back into the room.
"Right now." I say to Chanel again in a soft voice.
"Alright y'all, wrap this up. I'm tired and I got shit to do tomorrow." I demand.
Emil and Mena are locked into each other. Her arms around his neck, his hands on her waist. That didn't take long. Coca sits to the side of the room on her phone. She looks up at me frustrated and annoyed.
"What you mean? Why you acting like this now?" Emil starts.
"I'm heading out now, you bout to be talking to the walls." I say to him sternly. I turn to the girls and shake their hands as they come for a hug. Chanel on the line the entire time.
"Y'all take care now." I say, southern.
"I'll call you." Mena says to Emil.
"What?" Chanel questions in a low tone.
"She's talking to Emil, baby." I assure her.
Emil shakes his head and begins packing up all our belongings.
"Going to the hotel now. I love you." I say through the phone.
"Okay, I love you more." Chanel responds.
"Pussy whipped." Emil mumbles.
"Hold on babe, I think Emil wants me to punch him in the face again." I say casually.