Taehyung felt bad. So he stepped away with still shock in his eyes of Hoseoks action. He nodded in disappointment and walked to his bed and hid under his blanket.
Hoseok felt guilty for yelling at him. He didn't want to hurt Taes feelings.
"Taehyung...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come off like that" Hoseok stands beside Taehyungs bed apologizing with guilt in his face.
He didn't know what to feel or what to say but to apologize.
"It's fine Hoseok let's just sleep" Taehyung said from under his blanket that he was curled up in avoiding reality.
"...okay" Hoseok saids silently and walks over to his own bed. But he turns his body to Taehyung.
Hoseoks pov~
I don't know why I did that. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Of course I wanted him to stop but...part of me didn't. 'What's wrong with me?!' I scream to myself.
I just didn't want things to get complicated for our careers. And it's weird. I've known him since pre debute and we've been friends for the longest time. Why all the sudden feeling? Is it because we're men? And we kinda just can't go long without feeling some type of sexual pleasure?
I should stop thinking about this. Taehyung is probably mad at me right now.
I try to doze off to sleep but I couldn't stop thinking about Taehyung all night. And not just because he was sleeping in the same room with me. Or maybe because I hurt him.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
I woke up. But the sun wasn't out yet. It wow 4:00 in the morning. Everyone is probably sleeping right now. Even Taehyung.
I had a dream about him. Not just a dream, a very...sexual one. We were doing things we shouldn't be doing. I was kinda concerned.
I turn over at Taehyung who seemed to be sleeping peacefully.
"What the hell?" I whisper to myself and rub my eyes. I try to fall back to sleep again but something was bothering me.
I felt my boxers become tighter and I shot up from sleep and I wasn't the only thing that shot up.
I look down and realise my area was rising.
"No no no no no no no no no this can't be happening right now!" I scream internally to myself in my head.
I try my hardest to keep Taehyung out of my head but my sexual dream keeps coming up and so is my area.
"I can't believe what I'm about to do" I tell myself and quietly get out of my bed and slowly walk towards the bathroom and shut the door quietly too.
I lock and face my back to the door sliding down covering my face in embarrassment.
"Why why why why why why why????" I blamed myself for giving into Taehyung that night.
"I can't believe I'm doing this" I say and close my eyes facing my head up refusing to look at my own area knowing I'm thinking about Taehyung as I'm doing this.
I pleasured myself that night. I covered my mouth trying to not let my moans out. The last thing I want is for Taehyung figuring out what I'm doing in here.
I came a while later. I slight moan escaped in that last moment. I sat there for a while processing what I have just done.
My hand and the floor were a mess. I had to clean up. I wiped up what came out of me and washed my hands and also washed my face.
I threw everything away hoping I didn't leave any evidence of me masterbating to Taehyung in the bathroom.
I rub my eyes Once again and head to sleep. I was finally able to sleep after that. I didn't dream of Taehyung. What a relief.
I have nothing to be ashamed of. It's normal. It happens to all men. Man do these things. They pleasure themselves to models and girls. I'm still pure. I promise...
But with Taehyung?.....
Why am I denying it? Am I scared? Scared of what might happen in the future? Why should I be?
I'm denying it but really, I actually like Taehyung. Maybe that's why I felt bad for telling him to forget about last night. What do I do now? Do I want him?
Ugh this is too early in the morning to be worrying . I'm too tired to be thinking about this right now.
I'll deal with it tomorrow. I need to talk to Taehyung about all of this.