“Matt? Emma?”
Why the fuck am I naked with Matt and Emma, who also naked, in Brian’s bed?
I really started to get worried with the situation, especially because I felt a slight ache between my legs. This couldn’t be good. I pushed the covers from off my body and, still looking at both of the sleeping bodies next to me, I slid my legs out of the bed. But just as I was about to put my feet on the floor to stand up and walk, I accidentally stepped on someone’s body and fell face first.
“Fuck..” I heard someone mutter.
“Brian?” I called, surprised. He was lied down on the floor right next to the bed and he was also naked. What had happened last night, and why was everybody naked? Those were the main questions invading my head. Brian rubbed his sleepy eyes and sat on the floor, frowning. I tried hard not to look at his body but it wasn’t easy.
“Why are you naked?” He finally asked.
“Why are we all naked?” I corrected him and he glanced at his own body, chuckling a little.
“I don’t remember but I can make a guess..” He said, amused.
“Brian, this is not funny.. Matt and Emma are in our bed and they’re also naked.” His face immediately tensed up.
Did I just say our bed? Oh god, why am I even thinking about that now?
“They’re in our bed?” He also said it. He got on his knees and looked at the bed, seeing Matt and Emma curled up in there. “Did we.. with them?” He asked a little hesitant.
“I don’t know.. did we? No.. that would be awkward and stupid. Why would we do that?” I tried to convince Brian. Or was I trying to convince myself?
He ran a hand through his messy hair and laughed. “Oh god.. we were so drunk..”
“I know.. Do you think we should wake them up?”
“Not until we’re dressed.” He replied, smiling.
“Right.. I don’t know why you are smiling.. I mean.. what if..” I looked down at my lap.
“What if what?”
“What if I.. with Matt?”
“Why would you do that?” He asked, his voice calm and soft.
I shrugged my shoulders and glanced up at him. “I was drunk, he was drunk.. I don’t know, Brian.” I decided to stand up from the floor to grab something to wear.
“Well, what’s the last thing that you remember?”
I thought for a second and then slapped myself mentally. “Being with Matt on the couch, but we weren’t doing anything!” I rushed the last part not, wanting Brian to make wrong conclusions.
“You passed out when you were leaned against him and I brought you upstairs but I don’t remember anything else..” A wave of relief shot through my body, making my shoulders relax a little.
“That’s more comforting..” I said, grabbing a pair of panties and sliding them up my legs.
“Is it?” Brian also put some boxers on and tried to fix his hair.
“Yes. Maybe we had sex and then.. I don’t know.. but at least I came up here with you and not with Matt, so yes, it’s a lot more comforting.” Brian chuckled and walked in my direction as I put a bra on.
“I’m sure you didn’t do anything with Matt, because I was all night fighting with myself not to rip your dress off and take you right in front of everyone.. so I would never let Matt do it for me..” I shook my head, laughing lightly.
“I’m glad you’re so sure about that.. I was so worried. It’s like.. I woke up and the first person I saw was Matt, and we were naked. I freaked out for a second, before seeing Emma next to him.” I said, pulling one of my shirts down my head and sliding my arms through the short sleeves.
“I still don’t know why they were in our bed..” He said our bed again.
“And I don’t know why you were on the floor.”
He shrugged his shoulders, chuckling. “Maybe I fell from the bed.. I mean, the bed is not that big. It’s cool for two persons but for four it’s not enough.”
“Yeah, it was probably that. A least it makes sense.” I turned my back to him for a moment so I could choose some shorts from my bag, and was immediately hugged from behind by Brian. “You never waste any opportunity, do you?” I asked, smiling.
“To hol my beautiful girl? No, not really..” His arms tightened around my waist and my back was pressed harder against his chest as he kissed my cheek. That’s when we started hearing weird sounds, like moans and stuff. Both Brian and I looked at the bed and Matt was above Emma doing.. I don’t know what. But I think he was still dreaming or something.
“Oh god..”
“Let’s get out of here before I throat up.” Brian held the most disgusted expression in the world, making me laugh really loud. I think I woke up the entire house. He grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the bedroom. “Remember me of changing the mattress after today.. I will NOT sleep in that bed again..” He kept complaining as we reached the top of the stairs.
“Change the mattress?”
“Yes! I don’t know what happened in that bed last night and I sure don’t want to know what’s going to happen now.. the sheets are not impermeable. God only knows what kinds of things will transfix them and land on the mattress.” I burst out laughing again at his dramatic scene.
“Oh Brian, you’re so cute.. you’re talking like we never did the same..”
“Exactly. WE did, it’s our things not.. theirs..” He pointed to the bedroom door with the same disgusted and somewhat sad face. I chuckled and cupped his cheeks to kiss him.
“Let’s prepare breakfast for everyone before they all wake up from the hangover.. and I really need some painkillers, my head is hurting like hell..”
“Yeah, yours and mine.. I can’t even think straight.”
“Yeah, I had already noticed.” I smirked.
“Very funny, uh?” He glared playfully at me and I laughed.
We made our way down the stairs and found Zacky and Clodagh curled up in one of the couches, and on the floor was Lacey and Johnny. The living room was all messed up with lots of empty bottles; the remotes of the console were forgotten on each corner of the room; some of the pillows were on the floor; and the strawberry jaw was pouring out of the small can, soiling the area near Johnny. Brian let out a heavy sigh at the dirtiness of his house.
“Don’t worry, I’ll help you..” I pat his shoulder and went to the kitchen. “Where are the pills for the headache?” I asked him once he reached the doorway.
“Oh, they’re here.” He opened one drawer and took out a small pack of pills. Both he and I swallowed one with the help of a glass of water and then headed to the cooking task.
“Eggs and bacon?” I asked. He simply nodded.
After some minutes I had a plate full of eggs and another full of bacon. The guys from the living room were already awake, probably because of the good smell of food. They all looked like they got hit by a train or something, but Johnny was definitely the worst one.
“You sleep well?” I asked Clodagh in a low voice so that she was the only one able to hear it.
“Shut up..”
“You seemed comfortable in Zacky’s arms..” I teased.
“We were drunk. I can barely remember..”
“Sure, it’s always a good excuse.” Her angry eyes locked with mine and I raised my hands in defense. I stood up from the table where we were eating and headed to the kitchen, putting my plate in the dish washer.
”Finally you guys woke up.. what the fuck were you doing on my bed?” I heard Brian ask from the living room. I walked towards the sound and saw Emma and Matt taking a seat at the table. I guess they were also hungry.
“You have painkillers there.” I pointed to the small white pack.
“Thanks.” Matt mumbled.
“You still didn’t tell me what you guys did upstairs..” Brian insisted.
“Sleep..” Matt answered calmly. He was only wearing a t-shirt and boxers like Brian, and Emma opted for the dress of the previous night. It was probably the only thing she had to wear.
“Yeah.. like everyone sleeps naked.”
“What? You guys were naked?” Zacky almost choked on his food, laughing.
“Yeah.. they were naked in my bed.”
“Why were they in your bed, dude? That’s just awkward.” Johnny said and Zacky kept on laughing.
“I don’t know.. I woke up on the floor but they were on my bed.” Brian explained, making Zacky and Johnny laugh even more.
“It’s not funny.. or do you want me to tell everyone how happy you were with Clodagh in your arms back there in the couch?” Brian threatened and Zacky threw him a piece of bacon. Johnny thought it was funny and also threw food but this time towards Matt, who were still a bit sleepy.
“What the fuck, man?” Matt grumbled ready to stick a handful of eggs on Johnny’s face, but I placed my hand in front of him.
“WOW let’s stop. The living room is dirty enough, we don’t need more food crawling onto the floor.” I warned. They looked such kids. They all dropped the food on their plates and sulked.
“You still have a lot to explain to me!” Brian told Matt but he just chuckled.
“Just change the sheets of your bed.” Matt said, smirking.
“Of course.. believe me I will.”
“Don’t mind Brian here.. he’s just too exaggerated.” I walked behind his chair and wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing his cheek.
“Yeah right.. they fucked in our bed, how do you want me to react?” Our bed.., the words that wouldn’t leave my mind.
“Just forget it..” I kissed his cheek again and Clodagh huffed.
“God, so much honey in this room. I think I’m leaving..” She stood up from the chair and Zacky immediately looked at her.
“You want me to drive you?” He asked her. She shrugged her shoulders.
“If you want to.”
“I want to go home too and you probably don’t want to go with those two.” He nodded in Matt’s and Emma’s direction.
“Ok then.” He smiled at her and got on his feet, leaving the table. “Well.. bye guys. Have fun cleaning that stuff, Brian.” Clodagh chuckled.
“Yeah, thanks for the help!” He replied wryly.
“You’re welcome.” She opened the door and left.
“I’ll see you soon, man.” Zacky and Brian shared a one armed hug and then Zacky followed Clodagh to the outside, closing the door behind him.
“I wonder when he will admit that he likes her..” Brian pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his colored arms around my waist.
“Yeah.. I think he’ll never admit it.” Matt said.
“I hope he doesn’t like her.” Everyone looked at Emma, confused. Everyone but me. I knew exactly why she was saying that. “She will never have a serious relationship with him. Even if she feels something about him, she will always deny it.”
“Why’s that?” Johnny asked.
“She suffered a lot when she was younger so she thinks that her relationships will never work and she’ll always get hurt. The girls and I had tried several times to change her mind but it’s impossible.” I spoke this time.
“I don’t know if Zacky loves her but there’s definitely something between them..” Brian said.
“I know.. I guess we’ll have to wait to see what happens.”
“Yeah..”
“Well, I think we should leave too.” Johnny said, looking at Lacey for approval.
“You guys need some help?” Emma offered.
“No, it’s okay. We can handle it.” I said, smiling.
“Okay, so we’re going too.”
After gathering everything they needed the guys left the house, leaving me and Brian alone again. “Ready?” He asked.
“I guess so.” I chuckled.
“First I need to do something.” My eyebrows furrowed with confusion but then it hit me. He turned the speakers on and Metallica echoed through the living room, like the previous night. We smiled at each other and then started working. Fortunately our headaches were gone, so it was easier to clean everything.
“Shit, I love this song!” He shouted, stealing the mop from me to make it look like a guitar. He started shredding the mop and I stared at him with a huge will of laughing. I could hold it for a while but when he dropped on his knees I couldn’t contain any longer. I started laughing really hard and I had to sit on the couch, so I wouldn’t fall on the floor.
“Oh my god Brian, stop!” I said through the laughter.
“Come on! I know you know this song! Sing, sing, sing!” He threw me the broom he was previously using and motioned me to use it as a microphone.
“I won’t sing with this.” I had the most stupid smile on my face.
“Yes, you will.. everyone loves this song!” In fact, I liked it. It was Enter Sandman from Metallica but I wasn’t going to sing it out loud. “Come on, please..” He made puppy dog eyes and held his hands together, begging for me to sing. I sighed.
“Fine..”
“I knew it!” He grabbed the mop again and started rocking out as we both sang the song like we were crazy. Luckily the speakers were really loud, so our voices could barely be heard. At the end of the song we looked at each other and erupted in laughter.
“That was fun..” I said, still recovering from the laughs.
“Agree.. but we still have a lot to clean.” He said, demotivated.
“Aww..” I walked in his direction and cupped his face, kissing his pouty lips.
“Thanks for taking two days out just because of me..” He smiled, locking his hands behind my back and pulling me closer to him.
“It was your birthday. I had to do that..”
“You didn’t have to do it, but I’m glad you did. It wouldn’t be the same without you and your purple clothes.”
I chuckled. “You really liked that detail..”
“I love purple but you dressed in purple is even better.” Smiling, he lowered his head a little so he could reach my lips and kissed me. It started as an innocent kiss but with Brian that couldn’t last long. He quickly deepened the kiss, teasing me with his tongue. His hands grabbed the hem of my shirt and he tried to pull it up but I stopped him, consequently breaking the kiss. He growled on my lips and I chuckled. We were both already breathing heavily.
“We can’t, Brian..” I said, looking at his hurt eyes.
“Why not?” He pulled me to him again and started kissing my neck. I pushed his chest, laughing and shaking my head.
“We have the living room to clean, remember?”
“I do, but let’s pretend we don’t have anything else to do than getting in a bed an-“ I pressed one finger in front of his lips, cutting off his speech.
“Maybe later..” I caressed his cheek and gave him a sweet smile but he didn’t reply. He just looked at me with sad eyes, making me giggle. “Bri.. come on, don’t look at me like that.”
“Why?”
“You know why..”
He kissed me again but this time with no warning and in a fast move I was laid down on the couch with him above me, kissing my lips so softly I couldn’t push him away. It was like chocolate. Once you have a bit you need to have more, because it’s addictive. I thought I knew what was coming next, but surprisingly he stopped kissing me.
“I just wanted a little break, you know?” He tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear and smiled.
“Yeah, of course..” I chuckled.
“I have everything under control..”
“I bet you have..” I ran my hand through his boxers, just to mess with him, and his breath hitched on his throat, making me laugh. He immediately took my hand out and glared at me.
“You’re really mean.”
“I’m sorry, it was stronger than me.” I said between laughs.
“You almost succeeded but, as I said, I have this controlled.” He rose from the couch and held his hands out for me to help me get up on my feet.
“I’m glad you have..” I gave him a kiss and hugged his middle, resting my head on his shoulder. His arms wrapped around me, holding me tightly. I closed my eyes, just enjoying the warmth and the scent coming from him. “You could be a teddy bear..” I said, making him chuckle.
“A teddy bear?”
“Yes. I just can’t let you go because you’re too cuddly.”
Brian laughed and tightened his grip on me, if that’s even possible. “I love you..” It didn’t matter how many times he said those three words to me that my heart never failed to melt with them.
“Funny, I was about to say the same thing..” I looked up at him and he smiled at me.
“You’re still in time of saying it..”
“I love you!”
“Aww!” He sang, hugging me again and making me laugh.
“You’re so silly..”
“Bu-“
“But I love you, yes..” I cut him and he chuckled, before kissing me passionately.
---*---
The days were flying and the release of the album Nightmare was almost there. The guys had been working really really hard these last days to have everything ready for the big day, which was going to be on the July 27th. They had a small set of shows to present the album before the big tour, and I was really considering going with them, but I still had to talk to Brian about that.
I was watching TV on the couch while petting pinkly, which was comfortably on my lap. It was already late but since it was Friday I decided to wait for Brian to return home from the studio. I heard the sound of an engine getting shut off and then the door of a car being closed. I unconsciously started smiling, knowing it was Brian that was outside. I put pinkly on the floor and walked to the door. I opened it and he looked at me, surprised, as a small smile crept up onto his lips.
“Hey..” He said faintly before kissing me. I moved away a little so he could step inside and then closed the door behind him.
“You okay?” I asked calmly as I noticed the lack of light in his so used shining brown eyes. He simply shrugged his shoulders and kneeled down to pet pinkly. “Brian..” My voice held concern as I quietly called him. I heard him sigh but then he stood up from the floor and looked at me. My heart split in small pieces when I saw the hurt and sadness in his face. I didn’t say anything, just stared at him, feeling my heart slowly breaking. He approached me and grabbed my hands.
“It was just a long day..”
“Wanna talk about it?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
His eyes locked with his feet but then they met mine again. “I’m tired, Annie.. I just.. I need to sleep.”
I hated to see him like this. It was so, so heartbreaking that it really hurt. My arms snaked around his neck as I hugged him closely to me in an attempt to comfort him. He hugged me back and kissed my neck softly. I bit my bottom lip to control some tears that managed to form in the back of my eyes. I couldn’t help it. It was really hard for me to see Brian like this. I knew he was a mess today, even if he didn’t admit it, but I didn’t need him to say anything because it’s quite visible in his eyes.
“Thank you..” He said after some moments.
“It’s okay Bri.. but if you want to talk, you know I’m here.” I slightly moved away from him so I could face him. He nodded his head, smiling sadly.
“I know. And I also know that I have an amazing girlfriend.” He said, stroking my cheek.
“I just don’t like to see you sad, and don’t say that you’re not, because I know you are. You’re really down.”
“Hey,” He gently raised my chin with his hand, forcing me to look at him. “I’ll be okay. As I said, it was a long day but I’ll be fine. Don’t worry babygirl, okay?” He gave me one of his melting smiles and I sighed.
“Okay. I’ll try..” A yawn escaped from his lips, making me chuckle a little.
“I definitely have to sleep..”
“First, you’re going to eat something. In no way are you going to bed without eating.”
“But I’m tired..” He grumbled, like a kid.
“I know but at least eat a bowl of soup. It’s fast and it’s good.”
He thought for a second but ended up by giving in. “Fine..”
“Just sit there, I’ll be right back.”
“Don’t You need help?” He asked.
I shook my head. “No, thank you. I got it.”
Smiling, I left to the kitchen. I took a little more time than the needed, because pinkly kept chasing me and asking for food, so I had to stop what I was doing to feed her. When I returned to the living room I was confronted with a, I wouldn’t say funny, but with a definitely cute situation. Brian was asleep with his head resting on his arms that were on the table. I put the bowl down and sat on a chair next to him.
“Brian..” I shook his arm lightly but he didn’t wake up. “Brian.” I repeated and he mumbled something I didn’t understand but with his eyes still closed. “Bri..” I fondled his short black hair with one hand as the other was still shaking his arm.
“Hum?” His eyes cracked open and he looked at me, confused.
“You fell asleep..” I explained, chuckling. His body straightened up on the chair as he ran a hand through his face. I put the bowl of soup in front of him and handed him a spoon. He smiled and grabbed it.
“Thanks..” I kissed his cheek and stayed there, watching him eat and making small talk. When he finished, we obviously decided to go to sleep. We both headed to the bathroom but Brian got ready first so when I went to our ro- his room he was already laid down on the bed.
“I thought I would find you dead asleep..” I said, crawling onto the empty spot next to him.
“I was waiting for you..” He sat on the bed, leaning his back against the headboard.
“Hum..” I knew he was up to something. He wanted to talk.
“It’s just..” He looked at me and I grabbed his hand, squeezing it to encourage him to talk. “Today we worked on some lyrics.. and..” His eyes fell on his lap as he sighed. Oh god. It was so hard to see him like this. I tightened my grip on his hand and he continued. “Well.. you know that the lyrics of this album are mostly about Jimmy.. and.. we always think that we’re going to get used to write them and stuff.. but.. it only gets harder.” He glanced at me for a brief moment and my heart cringed again at the sadness in his eyes.
“I know it’s hard, Brian.. but I also know that you guys are very strong, and I’m sure that soon things will improve. Now it’s the making of the album, so it’s normal that everything is more difficult and that it hurts, but you’re going to make it through. For Jimmy.” Once again I had to fight hard not to start crying because my heart was completely broken at this point.
“I would do anything for him, I would’ve died fo-“
“No..” I cut him. “Don’t say that. Even if it’s true, don’t say it.” I looked deep into his eyes and he cupped my cheek with one hand, stroking it with his thumb.
“I’m sorry.”
I sighed and smiled a little. “You don’t need to apologize. But, please, don’t say that again. I can’t imagine my life without you.”
“I won’t.”
“Thank you..” I leaned against his side and he wrapped one arm around me. “I really admire you for not giving up and for being so strong about all of this.”
“I’m not strong.”
“Yes, you are. You los-.. you lost your best friend but you’re still here, making this album for him. You are fucking strong.” I looked up at him but his eyes were locked on his lap again.
“I’m only strong because I have three amazing best friends and one perfect girlfriend supporting me all the time.”
“Can I go with you in your first tour?” I burst out.
“W-What?” He asked, taken aback with my sudden change of subject.
“The little set of four shows you guys are going to make. Can I go with you?”
“You wanna come with us on tour?”
“Yes. I know it’s going to be hard for you and I don’t want to leave you alone.” I explained and for the first time in this night his eyes lit up a little.
“I would love to have you there if that’s what you really want..” He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it softly.
“I want.”
“Thank you, it’ll be really important for me.”
I smiled at him before he bent down to kiss me. “I’m glad you liked the idea.”
“How wouldn’t I? I’ll have my babygirl with me on tour.” He pulled me onto him again, making me chuckle. I rested my head on his warm chest and closed my eyes, feeling the sleep coming back. “Maybe we should lie down and turn the lights off before we fall asleep sat up.” He suggested after some minutes. He had been tracing ghost paths with his fingers along my arm and that made me get even sleepier, because it felt so good.
“Okay..” I mumbled not moving away from Brian. I think I didn’t even hear exactly what he said.
He chuckled and caressed my cheek. “You have to move so I can lie down.”
“Sorry..” I slowly raised my head from his chest and put myself inside the bed, turning my back to him. I felt the sheets covering my body and then one arm slipping around my waist and gently pulling me into a really comfortable chest. I smiled and snuggled closer to Brian.
“Sleep well..”
--
Since I had already talked to Brian about my going to their tour it was time to announce the news to my boss. I wasn’t going to lie and say that I wasn’t nervous about the situation because I was, and a lot. I knew that he was going to bitch about this, because it was almost a week the time I was going to be out. But I think I still had some deserved holydays to spend since I’m in his business, so, hopefully, I’d have some luck.
Monday morning I left home earlier and drove to the investigation center, where I knew I would find him. I asked Claire, the receptionist, to tell my boss that I needed to talk to him and a few minutes later I was walking into his office, praying for him to be in a good mood today.
“It’s been a while since I last saw you, Annie.” He said from behind the desk.
“Well, yeah. It’s true.” He motioned for me to sit on a chair in front of him. I did as he said and he held his hand out for me. I grabbed it and he tried to pull it towards his lips but I just shook it and put my hand back. I knew he didn’t like it but that was only what he got.
“So what brought you here?” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk.
“I needed to inform you about something.”
“And what’s that?” His eyes lit up a little and I didn’t know why. He had no reasons to be happy.
“I’ll take a week for holidays.”
“What? I don’t think I heard you well.”
“No, your heard it well.” I assured him.
“And this is it? You come here and announce you’ll take a week? You don’t even ask?” He let out a sarcastic laugh before looking at me serious. “I don’t approve. You’re not allowed to take those days off.”
“Why not? I have that right!”
“I say you don’t have.”
“You can’t do this!” I protested.
“I just did. Or you accept it or you’re fired.” What?!
I stayed in silence for some moments, trying to control the anger inside of me. I just wanted to throw my hands in his face and rip that little smile apart.
“Then I’m fired.” I said firmly. I was sick of this bullshit. Who the fuck he thought he was? He couldn’t just deny me something without a decent reason. He was not the king of the world. Even being my boss, he had no rights to do this to me. What had I done to make him hate me so much?
He chuckled nervously not wanting to believe me. “Are you serious?”
“I’ve never been so serious in my life! I’m tired of you and your shit!” I felt tears pricking up my eyes but I fought them back. In no way was I letting him see me cry.
“You’re brave. I never thought you would have the courage to do this.”
“Sometimes the strength comes out in the darkest and toughest moments.” I snapped back coldly.
“Were those vacations so important to you?” He asked, with disregard.
“More than you’ll ever know. And you know why? Because I’m doing this for love! A feeling you don’t have. Your heart doesn’t exist or even if exists, I’m sure it’s made of ice! You’re disgusting and you’re the most stupid and heartless person I’ve ever met in my life. I hate you with every single fiber of my body.” I glared at him intensely, watching the wave of emotions running through his eyes.
“You won’t be anything without me!”
“No! That’s where you’re wrong! With you it’s when I’m nothing. I should’ve quit a long time ago but it doesn’t matter.. I couldn’t be happier with my decision now. Goodbye asshole.” I turned my back to him and heard heavy footsteps behind me before my arm was grabbed and I was abruptly pushed back.
“It’s because of that jerk you’re quitting isn’t it? He forced you to come here and quit!”
“I don’t know what jerk you are talking about but I came here by my own foot and by my own will. No one has anything to do with this besides me.” I said calmly, yanking my arm out of his grip. “Now if you excuse me I have more exciting things to do than being here looking at your ugly face.”
“You’re not going anywhere until I say it..” His hand attached with my arm again but this time I used my free hand to slap his face as hard as I could. He immediately let me go, rubbing the hurt, reddened cheek.
“Don’t ever touch me again!” I warned and then I left his office, feeling a mix of emotions hitting my body. I didn’t know if I should be happy, sad, angry, disappointed, scared.. I didn’t know but in that moment I knew I had to leave that place. When I got to the car I breathed deeply and rested my forehead on the steering wheel to try to calm myself down. After a few minutes I decided to call Brian. I promised I would do it once I talked to my boss. I just hoped Brian didn’t freak out.
“He did what?!” He yelled on the phone once I told him what happened.
“Yes, he fired me.”
“He has to be fucking kidding me! I’ll kill that bastard!” Brian shouted, with obvious anger in his voice.
“Calm down.. he doesn’t worth all that importance.”
“I don’t care! I’ll fucking kill him!” He was beyond pissed.
“No, it’s okay. I was sick of that shitty work anyway..”
“And this is all because of me.. I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have quit it just to go with me on tour. I would’ve been fine.”
“No.. I want to go with you because I need to go and you need me there. I don’t care about this job anymore, I wasn’t happy anyway. Maybe it was the best for me.” I said calmly. I heard Brian sighing on the other end of the line.
“You okay?” He asked, concern pouring out of his words.
“I’ll be fine. I still have some saved money, so I think I’ll survive for some time.” I chuckled a little, trying to hide the sadness in my voice.
“That’s not a problem. You can always live with me now.” He said with a joking tone.
“Ah. Never wasting a chance, uh?”
”You know it..” I couldn’t help but letting out a small laugh. ”But are you really fine?” Concern mode: on.. again.
“Yes. And thanks for cheering me up.”
“I was serious about the living with me thing.”
“We can talk about that later. I need to go now, okay? I can’t stay here looking at this building.” I glanced again at the place where I once was happy.
”Okay. I have to go too.” We said our goodbyes and then hung up the call.
When I arrived at home I called Eilis to tell her the news. Obviously she freaked out about this situation but she thought I had made the right decision. She said I deserved better. Maybe she was right and maybe, who knows, I’d find a new job where I could do what I liked and what I was good at. We also talked about me living with Brian. I think he was just kidding, he was just trying to make me smile and stuff, but Eilis didn’t have the same opinion. She said that Brian was serious when he told me I could move in with him. He didn’t say exactly the words move in but that’s what he meant. At that time I thought she was just creating fairytales in her head but now that I thought about it.. what if she was right? Did Brian really want me to live with him? Like.. 24/7?
I heard the front door open and then close. I was already in the bed, waiting for him. I had been thinking all day and I started to feel nervous. I don’t know if I was ready to move in with Brian. We weren’t dating for that long.
“Hey!” He said excitedly once he stepped in the room.
“Hi.” I smiled at him.
“Let me just get rid of this clothes and go to the bathroom, and I’ll be right back to join you.”
“Hurry up.. the bed is cold.” He smirked at me, before running to the bathroom, making me giggle. I was still nervous. He took 5 minutes to get ready.
“You look anxious. Is anything wrong?” He asked, sliding inside the bed and moving closer to me.
“I was just thinking..” My eyes locked with my lap as I twisted my fingers.
“About..” His arm wrapped around my shoulders and I sighed nervously. He seemed to notice and kissed the top of my head.
“When we talked earlier about my job.. you said I could live with you but.. you were just.. you know.. it was just to cheer me up, right?” I looked up at him and his free hand searched for mine.
“I wasn’t joking or anything like that. I really want you to live with me permanently. You practically spend most of your nights here. It’s not a big step moving in with me like.. forever, is it?” My heart speeded up at his words and a feeling of fear rose inside of me.
“What does that mean?” I asked hesitantly. He gently lifted my chin with his finger, connecting out eyes.
“Do you want to move in with me, Annie?”