Kael's POV:
Carrying Rikki's body was one of the worst feelings of my life. She was dying in my arms and it was killing me why didn't she let me save her.
It's being months since that day and all three of them, Rikki, Bentley and Caine have been in comas. Kilah spends most of her time cuddled up to Bentley hoping that her presences will help him wake up but she's not here the way I am.
As for me I spend my time alternating between Rikki and Caine. That's all I do I don't do anything else I stay with them going backwards and forward day and night.
Caine hasn't got a mate and his only family are in comas so I wanted him to have someone to be there for him.
When I got the three of them to the hospital all those months ago the doc told me out of the three of them Bentley was more likely to wake up, his chances of survival was much greater then the others.
Caine was mostly the one they were most worried about his chance of surviving was the worst.
Then Rikki my beautiful mate they told me if I hadn't have marked her she would be died or in a far worse state then Caine.
Mr Adams fate isn't yet sealed currently he's in the cells being beaten black and blue by Jace and Carter once Bentley, Caine and Rikki wake up then I'll kill him but not until then.
I left Rikki to check on Caine when I noticed Leyla coming out of his room, I hid behind the wall and watched as she left with tears streaming down her face.
Once I was sure she had gone I went into Caine he looked the same as he always did but as I looked at his monitor there was a tiny improvement which got me thinking Caine hasn't got his mate and neither does Leyla.
If Rikki was here she would be playing match maker, the thought brought tears to my eyes I just want her back.
I want her in my arms, calling my name. I want her lips on mine but no she's in here because I didn't protect her I'm a hopeless mate. I've been neglecting my pack work too I can't deal with being an Alpha now every time my dad or my mom try to get me to engage I walk away.
I rubbed Caine's hand before going back to Rikki, my dad was waiting outside the door.
"Son, Kael you need to listen to me. You need to get out of here even if it's just for an hour, take a shower, eat something, get some fresh air, get some sleep anything.
All this isn't good for your health and it's upsetting your mother. You need to shift, all this isn't good for Spades.
Everyone's worried about you please son. I know all this is hard but Rikki would want you to take care of yourself, you can't look after her if your sick."
I know their worried but this is how I am dealing with things and he has no right at all to bring Rikki into this does he think I don't know.
"Leave her out of this, don't you think I don't know but I can't okay I'm not...I'm not strong enough."
He pulled me into his arms and I felt the tears fall all the anger, all the rage, the pain and the sadness came flooding out like waves.
"What if she does remember me again, I can't to through that, what if she dies I can't leave without her. She's the only one dad, I..I don't want to live in a world without her I'm not strong enough."
I felt his grip tighten around me as I confess all the 'what ifs' I'm so scared that I'll lose her and I don't think I could live without her.
"I'm not strong enough."
I mutter over and over again in between my sobs I want her back I just need her to say something, I want no I need to tell her I love her to her face.
"Come on son let's get you a shower and some sleep I'll stay with Rikki and Caine but I want you to have a shower, to eat something and get your head down even if it's just for an hour."
I just nodded my head and walked home, the shower was nice but I couldn't get to sleep. I put on my ripped jeans before laying on my bed, I don't want to close my eyes and then be told Rikki's died.
"Son it's me Bentley woke up."
I leaped off my bed and put on a shirt before running back to the hospital. There he was he looked tired but he was alive.
"Kael?"
Kilah had a huge smile and tears running down her face as Bentley brought her to his chest.
"Hey bro."
Was all that came out of my mouth the doctor said that we shouldn't stress him out which meant not telling him about Rikki and Caine.
Of course he didn't get a chance to ask because he fell back to sleep.
I decided to go back home to try and sleep the second my head hit the pillow I was out, knowing that Bentley was awake brought me a level of peace and hope.
"Jody I thought I told you to never come back."
What was Jody doing here when did I get outside. I looked around and everything looked so real.
"I'm your second chance mate Kael."
She whispered before guiding my eyes to a grave, 'here lies Rikki Adams.' No, no she can't be dead. No!
"Rikki!"
It was only a nightmare, I woke up in a hot sweat it felt so real. I put my shirt back on and legged it back to the hospital I have to see Rikki.
My dad wasn't in her room I guess he went to check on Caine, I knelt down beside her bed and took her hand in mine.
"Little Wolf, Rikki please, please if you can hear me please wake up. I need you, I need you more then ever right now. Baby I'm falling apart without you I need you beside me I'm not..I'm not strong enough. Please Rikki, please wake up I love you."
I felt the tears flood down my face the nightmare seeing her like this I can't deal with this, Rikki is the only one and I won't change that for the world.
I kissed her hand and closed my eyes pressing my head against our hands.
"I love you too my Knight."
I lifted my head up and opened my eyes to see Rikki's eyes wide open, I'm dreaming I have to be but I could feel the sparks.
"Rikki your..your alive."
I felt tears of pure joy roll down my face as she gave me a small smile, I can't believe it she's alive.
"I'm here Kael."
I kissed her hand again, she's here she heard me oh Rikki I love you.