She called me a puppy more than once. Based on her words, I'm more of a bunny but she also considers me a puppy because I follow her around like following her around is the only thing I want to do.
To an extent, she's absolutely right – I do follow her around and although I'd never admit it to her, that pretty much is the only thing I want to do. But what JJ fails to notice and what I'm careful not to point out (mostly because I don't want it to change) is the fact that she follows me around as well.
She doesn't notice it, I know she doesn't. In these weeks and months, I've gotten to know her pretty well – if she was aware of the way she can act sometimes, it would change instantly and that's exactly why I don't point it out to her. I notice how she looks for me whenever she walks into the apartment. I know she peaks her head through the door whenever I leave a room. I know she googles ways to help me, day and night.
It's crazy, I know, but the girl cares for me. And if I point it out, especially in a teasing manner, I know she'll stop with that behavior. She'll stop being a puppy too but apparently, she even stopped being a puppy now.
I was expecting her to follow me immediately, as soon as I left that old hag's place. She didn't. I've been home for at least 15 minutes and JJ is yet to make an appearance.
It doesn't matter what I do – JJ refuses to listen.
I told her I don't want to try and she doesn't want to drop it. The only thing I didn't tell her is the truth.
I didn't lie to her, I couldn't do that. But when I said I don't want to be disappointed when we don't find a way to help me, that's not exactly what I mean. The truth is, I don't want her to get disappointed.
For whatever reason, she made it her mission to help me and when it fails miserably, she's going to be broken. And I'm not sure if she can handle another breakage. I keep on trying to talk her out of it, not wanting a front row seat to another breakdown of hers but she just refuses to listen.
She's as stubborn as she is difficult.
And she is as difficult as she is beautiful.
....
As much as I didn't want to go home, I knew I had to. I didn't want to deal with Jungkook today, at least not for the next few hours. I didn't want to look at him knowing that another lead ended up being a complete and total dead end.
Well, not necessarily. But I know that in his mind, the end is as dead as it could be.
I wanted to postpone that conversation but I also knew it was impossible, which is why I eventually ended up back home, despite taking the long route back.
I kick off my shoes, noticing that he doesn't jump out to greet me like he usually does. I know he's here and hiding away from me and honestly, I can't blame him. I wanted to do the same but I had to go for the alternative – a cold beer and an awkward conversation.
I find him on top of my bed, staring up at the ceiling, not acknowledging my presence in any way. Well, not until I sit down on the bed and push his ass away with mine. "Move your ass, dumbass."
He lets out a chuckle which I know he tried to hold in but he moves and I plump down next to him, holding onto my beer before chugging in a way a proper lady should never chug. "Now what?" he asks.
"I don't know," I admit in a sigh. "Do you have any unfinished business here?" I ask him.
"Nope."
"Do you have any unfinished business but are lying because you don't want to elaborate?"
"Nope, not really."
"Are you sure?" I ask again, knowing damn well he'd try to lie anyways.
"Yes I am sure," he sighs. "Don't you think you're trusting that old bat a bit too much?" he asks.
"Maybe," I admit before taking another chug. "But that old bat you're talking about knew very well that you were in that room with us. You insulted that bat over an Ouija board-"
"I didn't, you stopped me."
"You tried to insult her over an Ouija board," I correct myself, growing more annoyed by the second. "She knows you were there and I kind of buy what she was selling, especially because she didn't actually charge me anything when she realized she couldn't help us. I'm not sure how it goes in the fortune telling business but I'm pretty fucking sure they charge you for breathing around them."
"Okay, you do have a point there," he reluctantly admits. "But she said you couldn't help me."
"No, she said you either have unfinished business or that you need to reach an ultimate level of happiness, like record breaking, Earth shattering level of happiness," I correct him. "And since you claim that you have no unfinished business to take care of, happiness it is."
"She also said you can't force that," he reminds me.
"Oh, so now you do trust her?" I ask, watching with a smile as he opens his mouth only to close it again. I knew he was going to say something like that and I was ready for it. "You can't just selectively trust her when it works for you. You either do or you don't."
"Okay, for arguments sake, let's say I trust her – she said you can't force it," he points out again.
"How the fuck do you expect me to force you to be happy, are you insane?" I laugh. "Of course I can't fucking force it! But like... trying to find it might be doable."
"Trying to find what?" he asks, looking at me as if I am growing scales as we speak.
"Trying to find your happiness," I shrug. "Hey! Jungkook's happiness! Are you here?!" I yell, feeling a bit full of myself when he actually laughs at my outburst. "Dude, I mean it. This is a win – nothing situation. We will either gain nothing and have some fun in the process or we will find your happiness."
"Have some fun?" he wiggles his eyebrows.
"Leave it to you to make everything about sex," I sigh. "I meant doing things that made you happy or something like that. That can't possibly be boring."
"JJ, we're not going to try to chase my happiness down."
"Yes we are," I shake my head. "You can either join me or ignore me and since it's your happiness and since you can't physically ignore me for more than like... two seconds, I think you should join me on my quest to find Jeon Jungkook's happiness."
"Why am I haunting an idiot?" he sighs.
"Hey, if you want to leave, the door's still wide open," I point out.
"Oh, shut up," he sighs and for a while, we stay silent. I let him ponder, knowing he will eventually agree with it. Not because he wants to but because he literally has no other option. I'm not giving him an option to back away from this. We're going all in, go big or go home. It literally costs us nothing to try and it might actually bring us one step closer to actual answers.
And if it doesn't... well, at least I'll do my best to make him happy before it's all over, even if that happiness only lasts for a little while. That's the least I can do.
He said it himself, once. Make afterlife more bearable. It's the least I can do.
"I really should have left before it was too late," he sighs but I ignore him when I feel my phone vibrating. I want to scream in victory when I see the text I got but I can't, seeing as I don't want to draw Jungkook's attention to it.
This part of the plan will happen without him being aware of it, even if it's the last thing I do.
Hey JJ! I'm out of town right now, but both Jin and I could meet you up on the weekend. Sunday sounds good?
Jungkook's going to play hard to get. And seeing as I don't know the human him, I'm going to need a helping hand from someone who actually knows the human him well: Taehyung, with a side of Jin.
I'm going to chase down his happiness with a little help of the two brains belonging to his friends.
"JJ, you there?" he waves his hand in front of my face when he notices that I'm out of it.
"Yeah, yeah, I just keep thinking about something that lady said," I mumble as I hide my phone in the back pocket of my jeans, the only place Jungkook wouldn't dare and reach unless he wants a slap.
"What did she say now?"
"She told me to keep an eye on GD."
"What?" Jungkook laughs, just at the moment when GD struts into my room and lies down on the floor, looking up at the bed with his cute puppy eyes.
What used to be my puppy is now this confusing thing. Why would she warn me about him?
"JJ, you don't think..."
"What?"
"That it's like," Jungkook points at my dog. "Actual GD?" he asks.
I burst out laughing harder than I did in weeks. "Are you saying that a rapper's alter ego or a piece of his soul is living in my Labrador puppy?"
"JJ, you're talking to a half-dead ghost who is haunting your apartment. Are you really trying to tell me something like that is impossible?" he asks.
I look down at GD, feeling uneasy in the way the pup looks our way. I gulp, trying hard not to imagine fucking G-Dragon staring at me in his puppy form but somehow it's impossible.
"Well, shit."
"That's one way to put it," Jungkook laughs at me and before I know it, I'm moving my bottle of beer to safety so that I can initiate a pillow fight.
A pillow fight with a ghost that can't be affected by the pillow unless he focuses on being affected by the pillow, hours after we visited a fortune teller. If this isn't a productive day, I don't know what is.