Jungkook: The Friendly Ghost

21. It's a choice, not a circumstance

Seeing Hoseok fully dressed and smelling his Armani cologne as he walks by me is a complete contrast to the pajama wearing, hair-like-a-nest me.

"Hyeri really got you whipped, huh?" I chuckle over my cup of cooled down coffee; he lifts his head to peak over the fridge door.

"What makes you say that?"

"This," I point at him up and down. "And the fact that I'm not sure when's the last time you actually slept in your own bedroom. Just remember to give me a heads up if you actually move in with her; I want to have time to find a new roommate if you leave me."

"I'm not leaving you," he rolls his eyes as he grabs the milk out of the fridge and joins me at the table, reaching to grab the box of cereal. "It's just easier that way. Would you prefer if I brought her home?"

"Nope, thanks."

"See?" he laughs as he dumps the cereal in a bow. "Whipped or not, I'm still considerate towards my bestie. Which is not something you can say, seeing as I had to live with you and Namjoon for years."

"Dude, you knew you were signing up for years of third-wheeling, don't blame me."

"I'm not, I'm not," he laughs, lifting his hands up in surrender. "You know, it's nice to see you smiling again."

"I never stopped smiling," I point out. I mean sure, for a few days, I was all frowns and sighs but it's not like I was crying myself to sleep night after night. I cried like a baby on the first night, a bit more the day after but since then, I haven't shed a tear, definitely not because of Joon. I haven't stopped smiling, I'm completely normal.

"I think you did, for a little while."

"I think you were too busy with Hyeri to actually notice."

"Wow, shots fired," he sighs. "I know I've been busy and –"

"No, I wasn't trying to shoot you," I start laughing. "If anything, I was reassuring you. You weren't with me 24/7, Hobi. I have been doing just fine. Just because you didn't see me smiling doesn't mean I wasn't smiling at all."

"Yeah but... you're alone all the time. Man, the more I talk the worse I feel!"

How can I explain that I am never alone? I haven't been alone in a while now. Hell, the word alone can just leave my vocabulary at this point! No matter where I am or what I do, Jungkook is nearby. The only time when he is actually willing to leave me be is when I'm in the bathroom or at school.

It has gotten to the point when it's sort of unsettling to just be alone with Hobi. Jungkook didn't follow me into the kitchen when I got up and at first I thought nothing off it but now I see just how weird it is to talk to Hobi without hearing Kook's adlibs or simply being annoyed by his presence.

To be fair, it's kind of nice to talk one on one with my friend after such a long time of having an invisible third wheel but it's also weird. Because I am almost never left alone.

"Hobi, I've known you my entire life," I chuckle as I drop my spoon and reach for his hand instead. "We have been friends for as long as I can remember. I'm going to need you to trust me on this. I am doing just fine. You would be the first person I'd talk to if I was going through anything. So just... keep that in mind, okay? If I need your help in any shape or form, I will not think twice to ask for it. Go, be in love, enjoy life. I will absolutely call if I need you."

"The problem is, I'm not sure about that," he sighs, frowning at me. "I don't think you'd call. I think you'd try to weather it on your own."

"Hobi, I'm telling you right now that I wouldn't pull a stunt like that. You're my best friend. I wouldn't lie to you."