A/N: never ever ever put "Neymar cute" into google images you will loose far too much time looking at them all. But hey I needed a pic for this chapter so... you're welcome ;)
I was awakened by the click of an iPhone camera shutter, and I felt Neymar stirring beneath me. I kept my eyes closed, not wanting to face the light just yet, but I could hear voices talking. Hector was the one with the camera, and he was talking to Neymar.
"You two are so cute," Hector grinned. "Did you sleep here all night?"
"I think so, it was unintentional though," Neymar responded. "Hec, I know this must look bad, but..."
"No I trust you, it's okay, and I know Nia would never do that."
"She was crying, Hector, like... heartbroken. She just looked so vulnerable and small, there's no way I could just leave her."
"Why was she crying?" Hector asked, incredulously.
Neymar didn't respond audibly, but he must have responded somehow, because Hector said
"Oh. Right."
"I know."
"What did he do?"
"I'm not entirely sure to be honest, but he's gonna cop it when he gets in today."
I couldn't help responding to this.
"No he's not," I said, blinking my eyes open to see Hector standing above us. "It wasn't really Lex's fault, I told you that."
Neymar rolled his eyes.
"Nia..."
"Neymar." I glared at him.
He sighed, and shook his head.
"Okay, I'll leave him alone. But you better sort this out."
"I will," I nodded, smiling a little. "Thanks, Ney, I... I really needed someone to just be there, y'know, and..."
"It's okay," he murmured, kissing my temple and leaving shock waves over my skin where his lips touched it. "Just don't cry anymore."
"I won't," I shook my head.
I avoided Alexis during training that morning. I'd come face to face with him in the dressing room beforehand, and we'd both decided it would be better to talk after the session. Somehow, though, that didn't happen either. Not that we were really to blame for that - we were both otherwise occupied when the time came.
There was a new girl in training that morning. I recognised her as Zara from the U21's. She was Italian, and had only been at Arsenal for a year, so even though I was only twenty, I didn't actually know her. First team football had consumed all of my energies, and I hadn't played for the U21's since I was eighteen.
Zara seemed nice enough, although she was very quiet, but I went out of my way to talk to her, since I was the only other girl there. She was tall - taller than me, with long black hair and black eyes, and immaculate pale skin. The contrast reminded me of Snow White. And call me judgemental, but I'd never seen anyone wear so much makeup to the training ground. That was merely personal taste, however, and I was prepared to welcome her to the team. She spoke only English and Italian, but somehow she picked up a friendship with Mesut and Alexis, which made me smile. Alexis would get the much needed practice at his English. I always spoke Spanish with him, it was both of our first languages, so it made sense.
"Is she any good?" Was the first thing Anya wanted to know."
City had played Tottenham at their midweek game (yesterday - ours was tomorrow.) So today we were catching up at my house, before duty called her back to Manchester, and me to the Arsenal training ground ahead of our West Ham game.
"She's alright," I shrugged, trying to be honest. "Not as good as I expected, but maybe she was nervous to train with the first team?"
"What position does she play?" Asked Anya, taking a sip of her tea, and wrapping her hands around the warm mug.
The London weather was, of course, awful.
"She apparently does well as a CDM for the Under 21's, they play a 4-1-2-3. We need a CDM as well, we've got Mo Elneny but he don't like playing there."
"Ah okay, maybe that's why your gaffer brought her up?"
"Yeah," I nodded, shrugging. "Anyway, how's it with Phil?"
"It's good," she responded, a stupid smile making its way onto her face. "We spend a lot of time together, but just taking it slow, you know?"
"Well, I'm happy for you then," I chuckled as she smiled like a sunbeam.
To be honest, seeing that smile was all I needed to be satisfied with the situation. I still wasn't entirely convinced that Phil was not just a distraction from Leroy, but as long as my friend was happy, I didn't mind.
"He took me on this really cute date to the beach," she smiled dreamily. "And we..."
"The beach? In December?!" I interrupted. "This isn't Australia."
"Well, we didn't swim," she laughed. "And you've never been to Australia, you wouldn't know."
"Damn, I want to though. And I should hope you didn't swim! Hypothermia here we come! Blue fingers and toes to match your jerseys, yeah? I see how it is."
"Hey!" She giggled. "Shut up and let me finish, idiot."
"Okay, okay."
She continued telling me about her date with Phil, and I smiled as she talked. She looked genuinely happy. I made a mental note to pat Phil on the back next time I saw him.
"We should go do something with you and Alexis one day," Anya suggested.
My smile dropped.
"Um, yeah... about him," I said slowly, and then paused.
"Oh no, what now?"
"We kinda fought?" It came out as a question.
"You kinda fought? Or you really had a fight."
"Like yelling, and stuff. Bad emotions."
"Lovely," she sighed, sarcastically. "How bad is it? And over what?"
I rolled my eyes, thinking about it.
"It's pretty bad. It happened a week ago, and we've barely spoken since then."
"Well damn, me and the girls watched your Leicester game on the weekend, that was like three days ago! You didn't seem to have any problems on the pitch! But football's a different language, I suppose."
I smiled ruefully, but said nothing.
"So, trouble in paradise, huh?" She stated. "Are you gonna tell me what happened, or..."
She knew I was avoiding saying it. She damn knew, but she wanted to know, and she kinda had a right to. We always shared our problems, and this was no different. Normally Hector was my go to, but there were some things you could only share with another girl.
"He basically accused me of cheating - wrongfully, by the way, I haven't."
"What?!" She exclaimed. "With who? Oh wait..." realisation crossed her features. "It's Neymar, isn't it."
I stared at her. It wasn't even a question, it was a statement.
"How do you know?" I asked in surprise.
"Really?" She laughed. "A blind United defender could see that there's something going on with you two, even if it's not anything physical."
I sighed, knowing if I was to explain anything at all, I was going to have to explain the whole story to her, and wished I'd done it when it was nice and simple. But I did it, beginning back in pre-season, and ending with Neymar and I discussing love that one night like it was the most normal thing in the world.
"I always knew something was there," she smirked. "And I'm now understanding your comment the other week about falling for two guys at once."
"What?! I thought you dropped that!" I groaned.
"Nope, never did," she chuckled.
"But do you get what I'm saying now?" I said.
"You have to see where Alexis is coming from," she reasoned, looking a little thoughtful.
"I do, but Neymar and I have always been this close, there was no other way around it! I tried avoiding him, but I don't know, he's like a magnet to me."
Anya shook her head, smiling.
"How can you not see it?" She chuckled.
"See what?" I frowned in confusion.
"But never mind that," she said quickly. "Let's go back to Alexis for a second. Why haven't you talked to him yet?"
"Because I'm scared," I whined. "I don't even know what to say!"
"Just be honest with him, what's the worst that can happen?"
We stared at each other, the unspoken thoughts hanging in the air. The worst, of course, would be that he would break up with me because he wanted someone who could love him like he loved them.
But for the first time, a simple thought entered my head that this might not be such a bad outcome. However, I didn't want our relationship to end just like that. Not when we'd waited so long for it to happen, and worked so hard for it. Although, neither of us were really working for it anymore.
I didn't know what to do.
"Damn it, I was never like this before with guys. I feel like I'm a terrible person."
"Hey, no, don't get me wrong, I see your point of view as well," she said. "I'm just telling you what you need to hear."
"Yeah, and I love you for it, so thank you," I chuckled. "I'm an idiot sometimes, I'm well aware of this."
"Aren't we all?"
We were both quiet for a moment, and Anya finished her cup of tea, and put the mug back on my coffee table.
"Okay," I sighed eventually. "I'll talk to Alexis."
"Good. You better. I hope it goes well."
~.~.~.~
I didn't talk to him.
At least, not for another week. It was a strange couple of days for me. I was quiet in training, carefully avoiding anything that wasn't a football. We won our West Ham game, courtesy of an epic Granit Xhaka long range strike, 1-0. Now we were focussed on our next Champions League game - we were playing Dortmund away in Germany in four days.
Neymar was the only one who stuck close with me during this time. He somehow understood that I didn't want to talk to anyone about anything, and he prevented it from happening. I was grateful to him for it. We were quite a close knit team, and I knew the guys had a thing about protecting me like a sister - I'd seen them get into fights on the pitch on my behalf, especially Granit, who had that sort of fire in his game, so much more than my calm Spaniard of a best friend. It was bad enough that Neymar and Hector knew that Alexis had made me cry, and I didn't want Alexis excommunicated from the team, which would surely happen if they all knew.
I'd noticed Zara seemed to have settled in better with the team. I tried to go out of my way to speak with her, knowing she could potentially feel awkward and alone, and I didn't want my anti-social feelings this week get in the way of forming a new friendship with her. However, she didn't seem to want my friendship that much. In fact, much to my surprise the person she got on the best with was Alexis.
I was watching the two of them talking and laughing together, despite the slight language barrier, as we ran our cool-down laps at the end of the session that morning. It was then that something just clicked together in my brain, like the last piece of a jigsaw puzzle fitting into place, and I saw the whole picture clearly.
"Ney?" I said, quietly.
He was jogging beside me, of course.
"Yeah?"
"I'm not jealous."
"Oh?" He raised an eyebrow.
"No, I'm not. But I think I should be, and maybe I would have been, three, four months ago."
"They're just talking, Nia," he responded, smiling a little.
"No, but...I don't know, that should be me talking with him, but it never is."
We were silent for a while, listening to the chatter of our teammates, and the sound of our own heavy breathing as we began the final lap. And then, I'd made up my mind.
"I'm indifferent, is the facts," I said, breaking the silence again. "I simply don't care. I need to break up with him."
Neymar turned to look at me startled, and then he chuckled quietly.
"I feel like I'm getting a direct audio link as to what the gears turning in your head sound like."
I smiled a little at this.
"Sorry, I just... I needed to say it for it to feel real."
"I get it," he nodded.
We finished our training, and we went in to get changed. There was no attacking training until later on today, but as soon as we were clean and presentable, we could get lunch in the cafeteria. I entered the cafeteria with Neymar, and instantly looked around for Alexis, but he wasn't there yet. Even Zara was already eating, and chatting away with some of her U21's teammates. He must be still on the pitch. I nudged Neymar.
"I'm gonna go find Alexis. Will you be here?"
"I'll be here," he nodded seriously, pointing to where Hector and Granit were already eating their meal. "You know we love you, okay? Come find us after. You'll be fine."
I nodded.
"Thanks, Neymar, for, you know... staying with me for the past week. I just... I don't..."
My words failed me for what felt like the hundredth time that week.
"Hey, I get it," he smiled. "And you're welcome, Nia. Now go."
And with that, he stepped further into the cafeteria. I turned, and headed back out to the field, in search of my boyfriend.
A/N: Arsenal be like SHOUTOUT TO MY al-EX-is YOURE REALLY QUITE THE MAN YOU MADE MY HEART BREAK AND THAT MADE ME WHO I AM
Also can we talk about how INSANE the World Cup has been so far!
- Messi missed a penalty (Ronaldo scored one, to complete a hat trick. Get rekt Messi)
- Argentina and Brazil drew with Iceland and Switzerland. (WOOOOOO GO GRANIT AND STEPHAN) But dammit I wanted Brazil to get the win. Never mind they'll win the World Cup.
- Australia (YES AUSTRALIA) almost drew with France. In fact we should have drawn with France! That was not a penalty you dumb idiots. I hate VAR already.
- Neymar's PSG understudy Cavani and Messi's Barça understudy Suarez won their game, whilst Neymar and Messi could only draw in theirs. Quality banter.
- Jesse Lingard and Dele Alli are adorable human beings and this shouldn't be allowed Unai can we sign them pls I fna <3
K thnx baiiiiiiiiiiiiii