Now that Y/N's parents were added to the already difficult equation, it seemed that Ally and I were both more on edge than before. Nobody else was aware of what happened or why the security had been amped up, but they also didn't question what was now going on at the facility. I knew Y/N could tell that I was tense, but she never pressured me to say anything; she didn't even mention anything. The only reason I could tell that she knew what was going on with me was because she would give me pointed looks every once in a while-looks that screamed she knew what was up but that she also wasn't going to press any further. For that I could be thankful, because I really didn't know what I was supposed to tell her if she were to ever ask. I couldn't explain to her that her parents had suddenly resurfaced and were trying to continue ruining her life.
I don't know how she would react to such news, but I honestly didn't want to risk the chance that it very well could go bad too quick for anyone to comprehend. Normani hadn't been able to recover any more news on Y/N's family since the first time, but she was also one of the very people that knew what was going on and that also made her tense like the rest of us. There was a very weird vibe transpiring in the facility but yet there was no one to question it or try to change any part of it. Y/N on the other hand seemed to be taking a step back on her progress after our shared kiss was interrupted by Ally coming into the room and ushering me out. Some days Y/N would be good, yet others she seemed to lose control more often than not. I wasn't sure on how to help, because all the distractions I have tried ended up failing in the end.
It seemed like we were truly heading straight for square one with everything else going on. I had tried cheesy games for the two of us to play, but Y/N's shaking limbs would irritate her even more until she was at the cusp of blacking out once more. She would grow angry with the stares she would receive on a daily basis, and she even had an outbreak pointed towards some other patients that she had caught looking at her several times. The exact memory continued to play throughout my head like a movie. We were trying to enjoy a lunch together out of her cooped up room, but that proved to bite me in the ass once I caught the familiar symptoms of Y/N's disease creeping up on her. Various veins popped out on her arms and on her temple, as her jaw clenched and unclenched.
Y/N also tried to clench her fists together, but that did her no good. In a matter of seconds before I could even think about stopping her, the taller girl had already spun up and out of her chair into a standing position; her frame seeming much larger than it usually does as she menacingly glared at the people in the room. "What the fuck are you all looking at? It's not like you all aren't in the same place I am, dealing with the same struggles! You're all fucking crazy too! Stop staring at me!" Y/N had yelled out like her life depended on it. Her jugular vein popped out from the side of her neck, almost ready to burst by the looks of it. I'm sure her blood pressure had been soaring by that point. At her words, some people managed to look away as others turned their heads to see what the commotion was about.
Y/N took a step forward to the closest person that had been staring at her; that's when my body had finally allowed me to move from where I was previously rooted to my spot. I barely managed to squeeze in between Y/N and the other patient before she was able to do anything she would regret. When Y/N's eyes met mine, they were severely darkened but not yet black like I had expected them to be. "Y/N, you need to calm down." I explained in nervousness. I didn't know what could have happened had she not listened to me. Thankfully, the taller girl didn't make any move to step closer to anyone else; instead, she lifted her gaze to once again glare at those who she felt was staring at her. "Let's go back to the room." I advised after a beat.
That had led us to the present; currently standing in the elevator in awkward silence as I could still tell that Y/N was seething in anger. It certainly wasn't as bad as before to where I was anticipating a blackout, but I wasn't okay with it nonetheless. I wanted to make sure that nothing would ever hurt her, and that coincides with the idea that I don't want her so angry about something that someone else did to her. If I was able to stop her from experiencing any hardship, I would do so in a heartbeat. Y/N didn't deserve to be treated the way she was by everyone else because they simply didn't understand her.
They didn't understand how wonderful of a person she was, and it was clear that nobody else wanted to try to see that side of her besides me. The thought saddened me, but at the same time I could be relieved that I didn't have to compete for a spot in her life. I wanted her all to myself, and as selfish as that was, I couldn't help the fact that it was completely true. I wanted Y/N all to myself, and I wasn't going to let anyone get in the way of that now that I knew how she truly felt about me. By the time I was getting deep into my head, the sound of the elevator dinging broke me out of my thoughts to see that Y/N was already halfway out of the elevator so that she could head towards her room.
There were a couple people out of their rooms and wondering why the taller girl had stormed out of the elevator, but thankfully Y/N didn't snap at them. I'm sure someone would end up hurt if she wasn't able to stop herself. Y/N had pushed her way into her room before I could barely manage to get out of the elevator; giving everyone an apologetic smile for my patient's behavior towards their wandering eyes. I quickly made my way into the room to escape the other people and closed the door behind me once I was inside the room. Y/N had already sat herself on the bed with her back leaned against the headboard as she stared at her hands that were resting on her stomach.
My mind kept wandering back to the scene that had unfolded only moments ago, but each time it felt like I was reliving the scenario all over again just as it had played out earlier. I can't say that Y/N has truly terrified me many times, but that was the few instances that brought me back to reality on the extent of her disease and how much I needed to help change that. At this point though, I was pretty much in the dark on how to continue treatment based off the failed results lately. That just meant that I had to continue trying harder, and exceeding my past efforts with something better; yet that something was unknown to me in this moment. After another couple of beats of silence, I took a step away from the door hesitantly. "Y/N?" I questioned in a whisper.
The taller girl didn't even bother to look up at me after I had called out her name. I sighed at the now normal response that I was able to evoke and took another hesitant step forward until I made it to the edge of the bed so that I could sit down. I didn't really know what I could possibly say to the Y/E/C eyed girl to make the situation any easier for her, so I stayed quiet after that. I couldn't really do anything if she wasn't willing to respond, so I wasn't going to push her into talking to me. She clearly didn't want to, and I tried not taking it to heart as I sat and contemplated what had just happened. My mind flashed back to the scared looks on everyone's faces, but Y/N's words stuck out most to me.
"I get off when people are terrified of me." She had told me in this very room as soon as I had brought her back from my house and we confessed our feelings to one another. There had to be some part of her tonight that had enjoyed the horrified looks on those people's faces. That thought alone could have anyone running for the hills, and although I really wanted to in a way, I couldn't. I was in too deep, and I had to help my patient into a mindset that treating such people is not okay, especially enjoying it. Everything about this situation terrified me, but there was something that was keeping me with Y/N. There had to be something deeper than just wanting to help, because everything seemed to be getting much worse now that I was learning more about the taller girl.
Her true self was revealing to me, and while that was a good thing for me as her psychiatrist, I wasn't sure if that was so good as another human next to her. There was reasons for others to be so scared of her, and although that rang true to me as well, I knew I couldn't let it affect me. I had to see past her tough exterior so that I could show her how I really feel about her; how much I actually wanted to be with her. I had to put my feelings to the side at least for a while so that I could focus all my energy on Y/N. That didn't mean I knew what to say to her just yet, but I knew in the end that was for the best, not like I had lost sight of that.
When I had looked over at the younger girl, she seemed to be staring off into space but her jaw remained clenched while her eyes were narrowed. I didn't know if it was in her own will, but she still looked completely pissed even after it had been a good while after the altercation in the common room. I couldn't really blame her though, I knew I had to look at it from her point of view as well. I don't know if I'd be too happy either if there so many people staring at me to the point of a breakdown either. I had to go back and think of how misunderstood this character was, this wonderful person that no one else got to see. Even I rarely got to see her in the light, but I knew it was worth it to keep working towards what I know she can eventually become. She could amount to so much more, but no one even gave her the chance.
I feel like that's what hurt the worst, and I wasn't even in the place to really be judging something like that. Y/N wasn't willing enough to speak about personal things like that, so I couldn't really ever know what was going on unless she told me. All I could do was watch from the side and listen in the off chance the taller girl wanted to talk about her hardships. That thought was what sucked the most for me, not thinking about what was worst for her. I didn't have the ability or the authority to demand that Y/N talk to me; all I could do was wait for her and it was frustrating to say the least. That didn't mean I was going to do anything different though. Looking at how she was sitting here, fuming to herself, I just wished so desperately that she would want to open up to me.
That seemed to be too much to wish for though. I had to play by her rules. Even if I knew that before, it was strictly reinforced tonight after everything that had happened. I had noticed that throughout my thoughts, I hadn't looked away from the Y/E/C eyed girl. Before I could however, Y/N had caught my gaze with her darkened irises and it was if I was frozen in my spot. I couldn't look away now, even as Y/N slightly rose from her semi-lying position against the headboard. I could feel a prominent gulp make its way down my throat as Y/N's face drew nearer and nearer to my own until our noses were barely touching. Y/N had maneuvered herself onto her hands and knees where she had crawled over to my spot as I was still frozen.
"Uh, Y-Y/N? W-What are you doing?" I stuttered out as I tried to lean backwards a bit. The taller girl only followed my movements until she had me practically pinned down on the bed. Her eyes were still almost a blackened color but somehow I knew it wasn't because of her illness. The look in her eyes screamed pure lust rather than the lost, absent looked they portrayed when she was about to blackout or while she was in that state of mind. I didn't know whether I should trust my judgement on the look in her eyes or not, but I knew I was completely frozen underneath her fiery gaze. Had that doubt not been in my head, I would be completely and utterly turned on right now.
Y/N had settled herself between my legs where she laid flesh against me, no words or sounds emitting from either of us. I don't know why she hadn't said anything, but I was still too dumbfounded to say anything. Not that I was scared anymore, I was just awaiting her next moves so that I knew what to anticipate next. I left my hands immobilized next to my head as Y/N's face slowly inched near my own. The more my fear lessened, the more I became turned on with her actions to the point where I had wanted to rub my thighs together. I would have, had Y/N not been pressed tightly between my legs and allowing me barely any movement. Not that I minded one bit.
The feeling of her muscular body being pressed tightly against my own sent shivers down my spine as a rush of pleasure traveled throughout my body at the same time. The pressure against the spot where I needed her most created a moan that was begging to be released. Y/N had moved her hands to my own to ensure that they stayed pinned next to my head before she swiftly connected our lips without giving me any time to think about what was going on. It happened so quickly, it sent my head in a whirlwind of trying to recollect what Y/N had really opted to do to me in that moment. A gasp emitted from my lips at the feeling of her lips on my own since I had not grown used to it yet.
When my mind had allowed me to resist the frozen effect I had encountered, I kissed back with equal pressure to show Y/N that I wasn't going to give in as easily as she expected. That didn't exactly work in my favor however; the younger girl just had a power over me that I could not match no matter how hard I tried. Y/N's dominance also didn't fail to turn me on even more than I already was and I found myself completely succumbing to her touch where she continued to hold me down against the bed. My breathing had picked up in pace due to Y/N's actions and the fact that the kiss was fucking me up more than I could have imagined. I still couldn't comprehend how much the Y/E/C eyed girl affected me.
Y/N had pulled away only to attack the skin of my neck while managing to keep my arms pinned next to my head. I subconsciously exposed myself to the younger girl, allowing her more room to explore the skin she hadn't treaded towards before. I wanted to give her the chance to know all of me, whether that be the emotional parts of myself or even where I experienced the most pleasure from her lips and her touch. A small whimper slipped past my lips once Y/N had found the sweet spot on my neck where it met my shoulder. I squeezed her hands in my own so that I had a handle on something. I just couldn't sit still while all the pleasure was striking me at once.
I rutted my hips upwards to try to create more friction but it only caused Y/N to stop all of her movements. She pulled away from my neck to look into my eyes which I'm sure were almost as dark as hers. What I failed to notice was that her breathing had to have been just as heavy as mine which was now fanning over my face as she hovered over me. My hooded eyes gazed up to await her next move, hoping she would allow for some release of the tension that had been building inside my body for the past couple of minutes now. I was craving some type of release; but I wasn't going to admit that to either one of us. I didn't want her to know how much she was affecting me, because it was kind of embarrassing and I didn't want the taller girl using that to her advantage.
She would certainly torture me from then on out. "Don't move unless I tell you to." Y/N's voice came out deep and sultry, making it even harder for me to keep my cool about the whole situation. I just wanted to jump her bones so badly in this moment, it was becoming ridiculous. I eagerly nodded my head, hoping she could continue her movements to push me closer to the edge. Before she could however, there was a knock on the door. I wanted to groan loudly as soon as Y/N slowly climbed away from her spot between my legs so that she could take her previous position against the headboard of her bed.
I looked over to see that she was barely affected by what just happened. When the younger girl felt my eyes on her, she smirked wickedly in my direction before the door started to jiggle open. I sat up in my spot just in time for the security guard to step into the room slightly. Big Rob looked between us two with a raised eyebrow. "Is everything okay? I heard about the incident." The guard asked, only trying to do his job. I couldn't help but inwardly curse him in my head for ruining the perfect moment we had created. It was just about to start getting interesting.
"Everything is fine, thank you." I nodded my head once in hopes of dismissing him. When he left, I managed to let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding in. By the time I looked over at the taller girl who was my patient, she had her head bowed down back to where she was staring at her hands. What barely caught my eye was the still-lingering smirk that was plastered across her face. She knew she had won this round, but I didn't know if it was always going to stay like that. She had to earn her payback eventually, when the time was right. I wasn't going to let her think she had the upper hand on me.
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If I released some books would y'all be mad