"Look. Love is a nightmare. Time’s over"
He had watched her walk away. No matter how much he had screamed or shouted for her to stay, she had kept walking. Never looking back. Never giving him a chance to stop her.
It was his nightmare; love, was his nightmare. The time of your relationship with Ken was over. There was no more Ken and ___.
"A miracle has come to me
From the beginning, we had started
Because I knew everything about you I was confident, yeah"
You had met him during the first day of your new job. The meeting with him was unique. Most people would say it would be creepy or they would say that he had a stalker like behaviour, but you had strongly disagreed.
Meeting him was the most cliche thing but the conversation was definitely not. His character showed confidence and subtile emotions. You didn't know why, but it had strangely attracted you to him.
His name was Ken. He had invited you to have coffee right after he guided her throughout the workplace. At work he was confident and showed a limit of emotions, but afterwards he was nothing more than just a normal guy who showed things to you.
You were surprised by how easy Ken had warmed up before realising that he knew a lot about you. Your first thought was that he was a stalker but then it hit you. He was Lee Jaehwan.
"(It’s cold) It’s just your mood
(It’s strange) I don’t care about that
(Thank you) All that matters is that you came back to me
You love me, right?"
It wasn't long until both of you had started dating. The relationship was stable and you both had a close bond.But as your relationship grew, you had started to grow colder towards him.
There was some point where Ken had seen you with a guy from time to time but he had trusted you. This being regarded as a close co-worker and saying that your cold attitude toward him was just because of moodswings.
Days past and soon weeks past. He hadn't seen you as much and saw that you was frequently with a guy. Ken didn't know who the guy was but all he knew was that his name was Leo; Kim Taekwoon.
He had thought that the relationship was as good as done but you had surprised him by turning up in his apartment. He didn't ask any questions or whatsoever in regards to Leo since all thoughts and memories of seeing you with him vanished immediately. Just from looking at you, he didn't care if you cheated on him, he was happy that you came back to him.
"You're back..." Ken had looked at you as he muttered the words under his breath before hugging you close. He couldn't believe it, you were back. He pulled away slightly and looked into your eyes. "I love you... So much..." He pecked her lips slowly before looking at her again,
".... You do love me right?"
"I had such a scary and bad nightmare
You left me forever
Even you can tell it’s a dream that doesn’t make sense
Because there’s no way I would lose you"
Ken sat up, body drenched in cold sweat as he tried to regain his breathing. He looked around and sighed softly in relief once he saw your figure sleeping peacefully. Slowly, he laid back down, gently hugging you close.
Ken had a nightmare. A nightmare where there was no possible way where you two could be together. It was a nightmare where he had lost you numerous of times, feeling his heart sink everytime he watched you leave him... But it was all a dream. Well he liked to think it was.
"You won't leave me... There would be no way that you would." Ken sighed softly as he caressed your hair, looked at you. He felt tears prick his eyes as he thought back to the bad nightmare.
"It felt so real... Please..." Ken looked over at your sleeping figure. "Please don't leave me forever..." He didn't think that you leaving him would be normal or would make any sense, but he definitely didn't want it to happen. He would never let you go.
"Don’t even get away from me for a second
No, I just won’t let go of you
I’ll accept every little thing of you You love me, right?"
"Ken, I'm just going to go to the convenience store okay? You don't need to come." You said as you placed your wallet in your pocket, looking at him. Ken shook his head slowly, "Ani... I don't want you to be alone." He replied softly but what he really wanted to say was,
'I won't give you an oppurtunity to leave me... I want to always be by your side and I will never let you go.'
Nodding slowly, you took Ken's hand in yours before walking out of the house. You hummed softly as you looked at the things around her.
Ken sighed softly as he watched you, humming softly. He had accepted everything that you had. Your looks, personality, your ways, likes and dislikes. He had accepted all of you because he loved you so much... You loved Ken back right?
"I wouldn’t want to see me without you even in a dream
If only you are next to me, I don’t care if it’s a nightmare"
You hummed softly as you hugged Ken close. He had started to act strange but it didn't bother you too much, he was just strangely clingy.
"Hey Jaehwan, why are you all of a sudden so clingy?" You asked as you looked at him. You felt Ken tense slightly before looking at you. "... I just don't want to leave your side, dream or reality." Ken had used such a soft voice you were convinced that it had actually happened.
"Jaehwan, you know that I won't leave you." You reassured as you nuzzled your face in the crook of his neck. Nodding slightly, Ken wrapped his arms around your waist ever so slowly. It made you believe that he was trying his best to believe your words.
"I know... As long as you are beside me I will be okay, even if it is a nightmare."
"Suddenly, you grow faint (I can’t seem to say anything)
I’m afraid to open my eyes right now (I wanna go to you, I wanna fall asleep again)"
He saw your fading figure and tensed. No, this wasn't reality right? No person or thing could fade away right? Ken didn't know if it was real or if it was just a dream, but he didn't want to open his eyes.
Ken wanted to yell, to scream out words so you wouldn't fade away. He wanted- no he needed to. But why couldn't he? It was as if someone had taken away his voice and had glued him to one spot where he couldn't move.
Ken was now afraid. He was afraid to open his eyes and see the cruel reality that fate had created. All he wanted to do was go to you and to fall asleep again... He wanted to dream of you. To have a dream where it was actually pleasant and he could have you close.
"Reality without you is like a dream where you are running away
Like a Möbius strip, we go round and round
You are trying to leave me once again
Don’t turn around, I’m holding onto your arm
If you wanna go, try to go
Try to leave as you step on my pounding heart for you
Right now"
Ken was confused between his dreams and reality. Which one was the harsh reality everyone knew and which one was just a dream? He had now forgotten which one was which. But all he knew that reality without you would be a dream where you would be constantly avoiding him, running away.
It was exactly like a Möbius strip, everything kept repeating. Where there was no such thing as something ending. Ken had felt like both you and him were going in circles. No way of getting out of this cruel reality or dream.
He had seen that ___ was trying to run away but he would never let her leave him. "Don't turn around..." He mumbled as he held onto her arm. He saw her struggle to leave as he held onto her arm, not letting go.
He had argued with himself so many times on his options of if you left him. Would it be best to let you go or would it be best to keep you with him unwillingly? He had fought so hard to find an answer, to try to steer away from wrong, until finally, he made a decision.
"If you want to leave me... Then leave. Step on my heart that pounds so hard for you." Ken had told you softly as he slowly let go of your wrist. You looked at him with an expression he couldn't read before swiftly running away. He knew your answer. You had now just stepped all over his heart that yearned so much to be with you in order to leave him.
"It was so sweet that I had a terrible nightmare
We had started everything from the beginning
You’re not here but everything is the same
In this dream the moment you left me"
Having another terrible nightmare was bitter sweet. Everything had started from the beginning, except there was no ___.
He couldn't see you or be with you. He had thought of it as bitter sweet but everything else was the same. Nothing else was different except having ___ missing.
He now knew what this dream was, it was the dream where you had left him for eternity.
"A cruel night is endlessly coming to me
I close my eyes again, taking me back to that dream"
He looked around as the sun was setting. He knew that the cruel night was coming for him and how it comes endlessly.
Ken closed his eyes slowly, taking him back to that dream. What dream? He didn't know. It would always be better than seeing the cruel night unfold what it held for him.
"Into an eternal dream that I won’t ever wake from"
Slowly he felt his heart beat steadily as he slipped into an eternal dream. A dream that he would never be awoken from. No matter what.