love?
LOVE?!
I couldn't help but throw my head back and laugh loudly at myself.
"Who am I kidding? I would never love anyone, let alone a bitch I met at a club"
...
I closed my eyes as I thought back to the first day I ever decided to visit the club...
Saeyoung obviously didn't want me to go but never protested, but the RFA was pretty chill about it...
I couldn't help but smile as I thought back to their reactions.
"People there are crazy!" -Yoosung
"Most people at clubs are drunk, but it's fun" -Zen
"The wine is good" -Jumin
"Be careful. Clubs can be dangerous" -Jaehee
"Don't get involved in the girls, they're usually nasty" -MC
Yes... the girls are very nasty.
I felt sick just thinking about them. They would only hang out with the good-looking or rich guys.
I shook my head as I stood up.
But _____ is nothing like them...
she never once showed interest in me... I feel different when I'm around her...
With many thoughts to think about, I made my way back home.
...
"I thought we had something. Guess I was wrong."
...
Her words kept replaying through my head over and over and I couldn't fall asleep that night.
What did you mean?
{Next day}
The first thing I thought of the next morning was her.
I rubbed my eyes as I reached out to check my phone. "Saeyoung, you idiot" I muttered as I looked at my screen.
Over 10 missed calls from him.
Tiredly, I placed my phone back and got up.
I yawned as I made my way outside. "Rain?"
I shrugged my shoulders as I began running laps around the neighbourhood in the rain. While running, I abruptly stopped causing me to almost slip on the wet floor. I took hold of a pole to keep my balance as I squinted my eyes.
"Oh."
I sighed in disappointment as I continued to run.
Just someone who looks like _____.
I had no idea why I felt the urge to see her so bad. My heart began aching in my chest as I remembered her pained expression.
Perhaps it wasn't such a great idea.
I regretted everything I said to her that night as I stopped at the park to take a breath.
I looked up, and clicked my tongue as I realized the rain had gotten much worst.
"Great. Just my fucking luck"
{Days after}
Just a few more days until Saeyoung and MC return. I have never in my life felt so excited to see my stupid brother.
I looked out the windows as I watched the rain pouring down.
I wonder how _____'s going.
I haven't seen her for days. I never dared enter the club after that. I didn't care whether she was there or not, I didn't have the courage to see her.
I wasn't going to lie, it pains me when I think about how we would meet at the same old club each night together.
"It's all my fault"
"Everything is always my fault"
I could feel tears streaming down my cheeks as I used a hand to wipe it away.
When I noticed I've been crying, I couldn't help but smile.
Crying over a girl. I'm such a crybaby.
Stupid me, she deserves better anyway.
...
I checked my watch and realized it was 10.00pm.
10:00pm...
This was the time _____ and I would usually meet up.
I wonder if she's sitting there waiting for me?
What if she gets bullied?
Thoughts began to cloud my mind as curiosity got the better of me. I immediately took a nearby jacket as I exited the house.
I ran as fast as I can, but once I reached the place, I found my legs were unable to move.
What if she is there?
What would I say?
How would she react?
How would I react?
What if she's not there?
I hesitated for a moment before gathering up my courage and walked in.
Yep...
She wasn't there.
I looked around multiple of times before accepting it and walked back outside.
"Why was I even expecting her to be there?"
Feeling ashamed, I walked home in the rain with my hands in my pocket.
I felt my phone vibrating again, but didn't bother taking it out.
Probs Saeyoung
While walking home, I looked up the sky. It wasn't the best weather but I suddenly found myself sitting down at a bench looking up.
"I'm so sorry _____. Please forgive me"