I took in a sharp breath as I could not believe what I was actually seeing. As her eyes widened at me and the curve of her lips turned up wards, I knew instantly that she felt the same way.
Ashcroft leaned forward.
" Darling, this is Gwen". He said, by way of an introduction.
But we didn't need one, as already she was grabbing both my hands with in her own and was now squeezing them tightly.
" I know exactly who she is". She answered, her smile getting wider.
I smiled back at her, as her soft, gentle sounding voice evoked happy memories from what seemed like a lifetime ago.
"Hello Amelia". I said simply.
Her smile now became a laugh as excitement erupted inside her and in a sudden, quick movement I now found myself being wrapped into her arms in a strong embrace.
"Gwen!". She spoke "Oh, I can't quite believe this! This is so utterly wonderful!"
She then pulled back to take a closer look before grabbing me once again for another hug.
"Can someone please tell me what exactly is going on here?". Ashcroft's voice boomed.
Amelia pulled away but still continued to hold one of my hands very tightly.
"Sweetheart, Gwen and I worked together in one of the Harry Potter films, which one was it now?". She turned to look at me.
"Goblet of Fire". I answered her with a laugh.
"That's it, anyway we became really good friends but .....well, you know, lost touch along the way. But, oh my god! What a way to meet up again!".
I laughed at her enthusiasm for it all and was glad to see she hadn't changed one bit! She still had that about her, she was always very enthusiastic about everything and also self assured and confident. It was little wonder that she had made a successful career for herself.
" Come on". She suddenly said, pulling me back towards my chair, "Let's sit down and have a proper old catch up"
I looked over at Ashcroft, who wore the expression of a confused man. He clearly didn't know what to make of all this and was actually speechless.
I obediently sat back down again. Amelia, who was still holding onto my hand sat opposite me in the seat that was previously occupied by Ashcroft.
She then glanced at the near empty bottle of wine and the two empty glasses.
"Be a love". She cooed at the still dumbstruck Ashcroft, "And get us another bottle will you".
I also looked up at him and his expression was still one of immense confusion.
" Go on then". Amelia giggled.
She held my hand even tighter, if that was at all possible.
" Look at his face". She went on, "I've never seen him so lost for words".
Ashcroft gave us another confused look, before sloping off towards the bar to get yet another bottle of wine.
At this rate I was going to be very drunk when I eventually meet up with Maya!
"So? has darling Ashcroft been filling you in on how we both met?". She smiled.
"A bit". I nodded.
"Oh, he was in such a bad place. He'd lost his job, his self respect. His mojo had totally gone. Did you know he used to go out with a model?". She said, her eyes widening.
I smiled at her and nodded again.
"Mad isn't it! Now he's with me! I mean I don't possess any of the attributes that a model has! That's the most unbelievable thing about this all Gwen, he just loves me for what I am and nothing else, bloody hell I am so incredibly lucky!". She said shaking her head.
I sucked in a deep breath.
Gosh, if only she knew what I'd just been thinking less than 10 minutes ago. But I couldn't tell her that, it really wouldn't be fair. She looked so happy.
"To be honest". I smiled, leaning across the table towards her, "I think he's the lucky one".
Amelia beamed at me.
"No, I very much am, to have you back in my life. What were the chances aye? That the very person that Ashcroft was looking forward to seeing again would be the one person I had missed most of all". She smiled broadly at me.
I stared at her.
"Did he really say that?". I asked, "Did he really say that he was looking forward to seeing me?".
Amelia smiled at me and nodded.
"He told me about this lovely young woman who he'd had such a laugh with when he worked in London. He said that he really missed her kindness, her intellect but most of all her humour. And he just couldn't believe that he had just up and left without saying goodbye to her. He really felt so bad about that. It was one of the first things we had a real full on, proper conversation about". Amelia explained.
I nodded my head at the sad memory.
"Of course, I then told him about this fantastic, adorable friend of mine, whom I missed with the whole of my heart because I had so stupidly lost contact with her and my one hope was, that we would one day meet up again!". Amelia puffed out her cheeks. "Who'd have thought that we were in fact talking about the exact same person, quite the coincidence don't you think?".
I shook my head in sheer disbelief.
Had I really made such a lasting impact on these two people, who had somehow miraculously found one another!
We were now joined by Ashcroft himself armed with yet another bottle of wine. I noticed the way that Amelia was now looking at him as she let go of my hand to rub at his leg as he stood beside her.
"I was just telling Gwen about how we both missed this one special person in our lives and would you believe it, its the same bliming person! I mean what were the odds?".
Ashcroft looked over at me as he expertly undid the bottle and gave me a shy sort of smile.
"We are both so incredibly lucky to have the same close friend". He now beamed at her.
"Yes". She said, now turning to look at me, "We are".
Ashcroft then proceeded to pour the wine into two fresh glasses that he had also brought over and presented us each with one.
"Now........I am sure that you have much to discuss, so I will leave you alone for a bit, to catch up. I've already had my time with Gwen". He smiled.
"Oh thank you darling". Amelia beamed at him, "I can't wait to hear about all the exciting things that Gwen's been up to".
I took a big swig of the wine that had just been placed in front of me and thought about how my little life could not even compare to her high flying antics.
With Ashcroft now gone and leaving us quite alone, Amelia wriggled in her seat with nervous anticipation.
" Well, go on then". She grinned.
I took yet another gulp of wine and could see her staring.
Did she now think I was an alcoholic?, having failed at being an actress and finding condolence in the bottom of an empty wine glass?
I smiled to myself and shook my head.
No, she must know me well enough to realise that I wouldn't sink to such depths.
Although, we hadn't seen one another for quite some time, who knows what she was speculating.
I drew in a deep breath.
The truth was, if I am to tell her what I want to tell her, then I am going to need all the Dutch courage I could muster and if that was in the form of several gulps of white wine, well so be it. But it was more than likely that the previous consumption of said wine was enabling me to now even contemplate telling her of my secret in the first place!
I drew in another deep breath.
" I'm going to be in a film with Alan Rickman".
The words came tumbling from my lips before I even had a chance to consider the consequences.
I then watched as Amelia's mouth dropped open and her eyes widened at me even more.
"You're what?". She asked.
My stomach churned with nervousness.
For ages now, I had been wanting to tell someone of my fortunate news. I had been bursting with both excitement and pride ever since I had been told I had got the part.
But keeping it quiet for so long had allowed me to really digest the enormity of it all and now that I had got it straight in my own head I was now ready to share it with everyone.
The strange thing about this though, was that I was actually telling Amelia first, which was not exactly on my list! I really imagined it would be Maya, as she's the one who really believed in me and encouraged me, even when I was at my very lowest.
But Amelia was the one who first put the idea into my head of being an actress in the first place.
All that time ago during the making of the Harry Potter film we were both in.
"You're going to be in a film? With............Alan?........hang on a minute". She said, shaking her head in disbelief.
" An actual film?". Amelia now asked.
I nodded my head at her.
"Wow, well I wasn't expecting you to come out with that!". She breathed heavily, leaning back in her chair.
I grinned at her, as again I took another swig of wine.
"Pretty amazing huh?". I asked.
"I should say so". Amelia nodded, "Not that I never thought it was possible, you understand, but just how did that happen?".
"Well it was down to Alan Rickman himself really". I answered.
"Just wait a second". She suddenly said, putting both her hands up to stop me.
"The Alan Rickman? Severus Snape, Alan Rickman? The film star?". She asked.
I began to laugh.
"The very one". I confirmed.
Amelia frowned at me.
"Are you sure?". She then asked.
"Of course I'm sure". I giggled, "I do know who he is, I did get his autograph once, remember?".
It was now Amelia's turn to down some wine. This had really surprised her and I don't think she really quite believed me.
"He came to direct a play I was in". I began to explain.
" Alan did?". Amelia frowned.
"Yes". I nodded, "Apparently he does quite a lot of theatre direction. He's well known for it. Anyway, after getting off on completely the wrong foot, Alan suggested that I try for this film part he was involved with".
"Wow! It really sounds as if he was very impressed with your acting skills then". Amelia nodded. "Because theatre actors hardly ever get that sort of an opportunity".
"Really?". I asked.
Amelia smiled and shook her head at me.
"No Gwen, they do not".
I stared at her, then swallowed hard at the enormity of her words.
"Anyway". She suddenly said: "What do you mean, you got off on the wrong foot with Alan, didn't you like him?".
I shook my head.
"No, not at all. I thought he was particularly hard on me. Kept getting me to redo my lines over and over again. It got to the point that one day I just stormed off the stage and vowed never to speak to him again".
"Ah,Gwen". Amelia laughed, "Getting feisty in your old age now are you?".
"Well I don't know about that, but he drove me to it!". I said, reliving the memory of how I had felt when I did it.
Amelia picked up her glass and took a long sip. She looked so elegant and happy and in control. Listening to me going on about losing my shit with a famous film star must be very amusing for her and I suddenly felt quite embarrassed.
"Anyway". I said, taking a breath, "I auditioned and got the part and I start filming next week".
Amelia's baby blue eyes widened at me.
"Oh, Gwen that's wonderful!". She beamed. "I'm so happy for you, really I am. But I don't understand what Alan Rickman's involvement is in all of this? Is he some sort of a talent scout now or something?". She asked, taking another elegant sip from her wine glass.
"Um, I thought so, when he first mentioned it to me, but when we went to visit my parents last week, he dropped it on me that he is also in it as well!". I explained.
There was suddenly an almighty spluttering sound from opposite me, followed by a choking kind of cough and then a squeak from Amelia as she tried to compose herself.
Tapping at her chest with long, well manicured finger tips, she was finding it hard to get any sort of words to form from out of her perfectly shaped pink lips.
I began to smile at her total lack of decorum. I was finding all of this quite funny really and so happily waited patiently for her to settle herself down.
"He........he........went to your parents?". She eventually asked.
"He took me". I grinned, "Drove me to Shropshire in his rather posh BMW".
"He.......drove you?, oh Gwen this just keeps on getting better and better!". She exclaimed. "So, come on, tell me all about it. What exactly happened?".
I took in a deep breath, and allowed myself a little smile before beginning:
"Well, it was while we were having some tea and cake at my parents that he told me he was in fact, playing a major part in the film himself. The funny thing was, even though I obviously knew he was an actor and everything, it actually hadn't dawned on me that he would be in it as well, strange that, don't you think?". I asked.
But Amelia wasn't concerning herself about that at all.
"Alan Rickman .......had tea...........and cake......at your parents?". She asked slowly.
" What?". I frowned, slightly taken a back.
"He was inside your parents house". Amelia went on.
"Er, well yes". I answered, still frowning.
"Blimey Gwen, he must really rate you. Famous actors do not do that sort of thing you know". She said seriously.
I stared at her.
"Don't they?". I asked.
Amelia shook he head.
"Don't be so nieve Gwen, You must know that they don't. He either thinks you are enormously talented or he.............".
Her voice trailed away.
"Or what?". I asked.
Amelia pointed at my glass.
"Have some more wine, I'm beginning to leave you behind". She smiled, avoiding my question.
"Then explain to me how you managed at your audition".
She went on.
"Oh, it was quite simple really. Alan gave me a copy of the script, I read through it, decided that it looked a good part and he arranged it all for me". I shrugged. "Even got his personal driver to take me there".
Amelia looked under her eyes at me in a questioning way, but I carried on regardless.
" I mean, I would like to think that I actually got the part purely on my own merit of course, but I do believe that Alan may have had some influence in it, after all it was his idea that I auditioned in the first place!". I continued to explain.
Amelia shook her head in disbelief at me and I could see that my revelations had very much surprised her. Although actually saying it out loud like this, sounded very darn unreal to me also.
"So, are you allowed to tell me anything about the film then?". She asked somewhat cagily.
"I don't see why not". I smiled at her. "All of this is rather exciting".
Amelia puffed out her cheeks.
"You're telling me!". She exclaimed, shaking her head in honourable disbelief.
" Well, the film is called "A Gentleman's Agreement". It's actually about two high flying executives who were once really close friends suddenly meeting up again after many years apart. Each of them have become really successful CEO's at rival companies, but they don't let that get in the way, at first, from their mutual respect for one another or indeed their rekindled friendship".
I looked at Amelia who seemed riveted by the plot.
"Anyway". I continued, "The trouble arises when one of the friends brings his daughter along to a luncheon organised by the other friend, who then, incidentaly falls immediately in love with her. Knowing how wrong it would be to carry on with his growing obsession with her, he tries in vain to fix her up with his own son, but of course it doesn't work out as she as also fallen for the older man herself".
Amelia's eyes widened.
" This sounds great". She beamed.
I nodded my head.
"I know, but it doesn't really end very well. Its a bit tragic really, a real twist in fact so I won't spoil it for you. You'll just have to come along and see it for yourself". I concluded.
" Oh don't you worry". She said, wriggling excitedly in her chair, "I most certainly will".
I then smiled at her. It was so lovely to have her support.
" So?". She then asked nonchalantly, "What part will you be playing. Is it a speaking part or just a walk on".
I stared at her. Gosh! She had no idea! She hadn't the faintest thought that I was in fact playing the lead role!
I took in a breath.
"I play Christina Greebe". I began.
Amelia nodded her head quietly.
" The lead female role". I went on.
She stared at me with shock and sheer disbelief on her face. I began to laugh.
"You're joking right?". She asked, taking my laughter to mean that I was actually winding her up.
I shook my head.
"No, I'm not, I'm just laughing at the expression on your face. It's classic!".
"So let me get this straight". She breathed, "You're not only in this film, you're actually staring in it?".
"Well, I wouldn't go as far as saying that!". I giggled.
"But you are playing the daughter, the part in which the whole film is actually centured around?". Amelia said slowly, trying to confirm it all.
"Yes". I beamed. " I am".
Amelia puffed out her cheeks once more and reached for the now nearly empty wine bottle and refilled both our glasses.
" So whose the director then?". She asked, as she poured.
"Oh, it's David McIntyre". I answered cooly.
Amelia replaced the bottle with a bang onto the table.
"Woah, Gwen this is big time stuff". She breathed heavily, "I mean, this is major".
I began to laugh.
"It is pretty cool isn't it". I agreed.
"I should think so!". Amelia nodded.
"There's also Jeremiah Johnston and Jules Rybak in it too, as well as Alan of course". I went on.
"Oh, I don't rate Jeremiah Johnston much as an actor". Scoffed Amelia, "But Jules Rybak! Isn't he in line to be the next James Bond or something".
I shrugged my shoulders, then put my head down for a moment.
"The script demands that I have to passionately kiss him". I revealed.
"Really?". Amelia shrieked, "Bloody hell Gwen!".
"That's not all". I mumbled. "You see, its quite an erotic film, lots of..........well...you know......sex scenes in it".
I had now got Amelia's absolute total attention, although I severely doubted it was missing anyway!
"Jesus! You get to romp about in a bed with Jules Rybak!". She almost screamed out so loudly, I was nervous that the other customers would hear her.
"Shh, no I don't. Not with him". I said with a wave of my hand.
Amelia was now frowning at me.
"Oh?, well who with then?". She asked.
I gave a deep sigh.
"Haven't you been listening at all to the plot". I said.
Her blank expression told me that she hadn't really grasped the real crux of the story line.
I gave her a little smile.
"Christina is absolutely besotted with her Father's best friend, as he is with her, so you see, she isn't really interested in the son, even though they are roughly the same age. He just doesn't do it for her. So no, there are no intimate love scenes with them two". I explained.
"Oh, bad luck Gwen. I bet you're gutted". Amelia sighed.
"No, not really". I grinned. "Like my character Christina, he doesn't really do it for me either".
Amelia now was smiling at me from over the top of her wine glass.
"So who does then?". She asked, cocking an eyebrow, "Coz the last I heard you were going to shack up with some guy in a flat somewhere? Is that still going on?".
I began to laugh.
"No, there is nothing going on there, never will be". I said, "We are totally, just friends".
"So you're still living with him then?". She asked.
"Oh yes, we get on great. Marcus is at the theatre with me. He's a lovely person to be around, he's just, well let's just say I'm not his type". I smiled.
"Not his type?". Amelia said with scorn. "How could you not be his type? Just look at you! You'd be anyone's type. Is he blind".
I looked down and smiled to myself.
" Oh my God! He is isn't he. Oh shit Gwen I'm so sorry, me and my big, old stupid mouth!". Amelia said, clamping her hands over her face.
I shook my head at her.
"No, he's not blind". I soothed.
She frowned at me.
"Well what is it then, because to be honest with you Gwen, he's making one huge mistake by not being with you".
"Not according to Marcus". I laughed, "You see I'm really not right for him, not at all, wrong gender you see".
"Wrong.......what?". Asked Amelia.
" Gender". I repeated with a grin, "Do you see now?".
Amelia stared hard at me for a moment, seemingly digesting this bit of information, before she picked up her glass again and without adding anything more about my relationship with Marcus, then asked suddenly:
" As there ever been anybody you've ever fallen for? You know, fallen madly in love with?".
My stomach twisted and my heart was now pounding.
My God! had Ashcroft told her about my feelings for him! Or had she guessed?
I shook my head, more for myself than answering her.
Surely they hadn't been talking that way about my friendship with him? In any case that was all in the past now.
"I had to snog Marcus in the last play we did". I said, quickly
changing the subject.
Amelia's eyes widened, as I began to laugh.
"There was more acting on his part than there ever was in mine, I can tell you. But he handled it well, bless him".
"From theatre actress to film star". Amelia suddenly announced "Wow, Gwen you really have made something of yourself haven't you".
I shook my head wildly.
" Oh, let's not get carried away now, I haven't even started filming yet". I answered rather nervously. "I might not be any good, and to be perfectly honest, I'm really rather scared".
"You'll be fine". Amelia soothed, "I mean look, you have the backing of a famous movie star to begin with and with his experience, well he could obviously see something couldn't he?".
"Well yes, I suppose so". I answered quietly.
" And didn't you say that he is also in the film as well?". She asked.
I nodded my head.
"Well then! That's brilliant isn't it, because it seems to me that he'll be on hand to help you anyway". She said.
I took a deep breath and sipped at the last drop of my wine.
" So?". She now grinned, "You fall in love with an older man then? An older, dare I say, more experienced man with a grown up son?".
"Yes, and he's got no wife either. Apparently she died when their son was very small, so this man brought him up alone". I explained.
" He's lonely then?". Amelia asked.
I frowned at the thought.
"I wouldn't have thought so. I mean, he's a very successful businessman with a very good social life. I just happen to think, he fell in love. Simple as that!".
Amelia cocked her head to one side.
"With a nieve young woman". She clarified.
I nodded my head.
"Umm". She was now thoughtful. "You're not being typecast at all, are you".
I began to laugh.
"Just a little bit". I agreed with her.
Amelia then smiled warmly.
" It's just a pity you're having to play right opposite Jeremiah Johnston." She went on, "I had the misfortune to be in a play with him once. I didn't find him to be particularly pleasing to work with. Couldn't be bothered was how he came across, although he might be different on a film set of course".
"Maybe......". I said slowly, "But thankfully, if he's as bad as you say, I don't really have to do that many scenes with him".
"Oh?". Amelia said, now also finishing off her own glass of wine. "So he's not your love interest then?".
I shook my head.
"No he's not. Maybe it would be easier if he was". I mumbled under my breath.
Amelia was now listening hard, trying to figure out what I was in fact going on about. She looked confused.
"He plays my Father, Raymond Greebe". I said, a bit louder this time.
Amelia's eyes again widened, almost excitedly.
"Does this mean............?"
But she didn't get to finish, as we were now rejoined by Ashcroft appearing suddenly at our table.
"I could see from over there, that both your glasses and the bottle is now empty. Care for another one?". He asked.
I shook my head, and went to get up.
"I really ought to be going ". I said, "I have to meet a friend I haven't seen in ages and I'm late already".
Amelia suddenly grabbed at my arm.
"Oh no you don't". She said, " You have one heck of a lot more explaining to do yet! Besides I'm a friend you haven't seen in ages also" She beamed.
Then looking up at Ashcroft again, she then said:
"We will have another bottle please Ash, but make it champagne this time. We're celebrating!".
He looked at the both of us in turn.
I had on purposely not mentioned anything to Ashcroft about being in a film, as I wasn't even sure that I wanted to tell anyone but Maya, at the time and to be honest, I didn't really want Ashcroft to know, just yet!
I stared hard at Amelia. I didn't want her to go blurting out about it either, not at the moment, but luckily she caught my eye and read my thoughts on this.
"Please, love.........champagne? We have to celebrate our reunion now, don't we". Amelia said, now holding his arm affectionately.
With an obedience that I had rarely seen in him before, Ashcroft sloped off, back towards the bar without any questions being asked.
" Now then". Amelia, said quietly now leaning across the table and looking at me right in the eyes.
"Have you got something you'd like to share with me?".
I smiled somewhat coyly.
"Yes, it is Alan Rickman who plays my love interest". I said.
Amelia suddenly sat upright, her hands covering her mouth to suppress the whoops of delight that would have surely escaped, if allowed to.
" And we have to kiss". I went on, "And other things".
"Oh my goodness!". She squealed. "Really? You and Alan Rickman?".
I nodded my head.
"But you don't like him". She said. "He was horrid to you. You told me".
"I did.........I mean.....I do......oh Christ, I don't know what I mean anymore. I'm just so confused about it all. He's been so nice". I explained.
" Just doing his job, I suspect". Amelia smiled. "You know, looking out for a fellow actor".
I stared at her for a moment.
"But to be honest Gwen". She went on, "He does appear to be going above and beyond with all of this. I suspect that he actually really likes you".
I gave a big gulp.
"But don't look so worried". She smiled. "I mean, that's a good thing right? Its wonderful that he does. It means he'll be able to guide and help with all those potentially embarrassing scenes. You'll probably, most likely end up laughing about it all". Amelia said.
I shook my head.
" I doubt that very much". I mumbled.
Amelia frowned at me and was about to open her mouth to say something, when Ashcroft arrived back again, this time armed with the requested bottle of champagne.
" There you go Ladies!". He announced. "José's finest bottle of bubbly, with compliments from the man himself!".
My stomach twisted as a sudden wave of guilt came over me.
Oh heck, I was coming in today to tell him I was leaving my little washing up job. But instead, I'd been drinking myself into a stupor all afternoon, at his expense and hadn't even mentioned my plans to him at all.
I gave a huge sigh to myself as Ashcroft popped the cork from the bottle and Amelia clapped with delight as the rest of the customers looked on.
Hell, this was also a restaurant too, not a wine bar and we hadn't ordered anything to eat either!
Now I felt doubly guilty, as my thoughts now went towards Maya, waiting for me to turn up for lunch and with me being a no show.
"Look, I really must be going". I said. "You both enjoy the champagne, I have to go".
I now felt truly awful and my head was also spinning. Whether it was the copious amount of alcohol I had consumed on an empty stomach, or the fact that I hadn't told José of my plans about leaving, my shock at seeing Marcus now with that creep Hugo or my complete lack of respect for Maya, I don't know. But it could also easily have been a sudden attack of nerves at the thought of what was about to begin next week concerning my step into the film industry or indeed even Alan.
Alan Rickman, who the last time I saw him, I was pretty damn mean to and who needed an apology from me. I couldn't believe I had fallen out with him like that, after he had only shown me immense kindness lately. This was unforgivable.
And now I had met up with some one who I used to have the biggest feelings for, who now happens to be with a very dear and close friend of mine and who I had just told everything to.
Well, almost everything.
I stood up quickly, a bit too quickly, as I now swayed unsteadily from side to side as the wooziness took over the scrambled, mixed up emotions going on inside my head.
" Woah, there Gwen. Are you alright?". Ashcroft said, catching hold of my arm to steady me.
"Sit back down". Amelia said. "You're not going anywhere just yet".
I lowered myself back into my seat again as I noticed the concerned look in Ashcroft's eyes.
"Maybe I'll get you a coffee instead". He suggested.
" Nonsense". Laughed Amelia, "She'll be aright with one of these inside her. Come on Gwen, let's celebrate".
I looked at the glass that Ashcroft had now given me with its amber coloured liquid and dancing array of bubbles contained within.
Oh what the heck!
We should be celebrating!
Its not everyday I become a film actress anyway!
We all clinked our glasses together, before Ashcroft once again left us to go and talk some more with José. Amelia and I began to sip from our drink and both agreed that it tasted really good and suddenly I started to feel so much better.
After all, I could speak with José later on. He wouldn't mind me leaving I'm sure of it. He's always been very supportive of my acting, he'd be made up!
Maya would also be understanding. She would know how important it was for me to see my old friend again and anyway I would make it up to her another time, and treat her to lunch maybe. Once I told her about the film she'd be more than ok.
As for Marcus and Hugo.
Well Hugo would not have been my own preferred choice for such a kind and lovely guy such as Marcus, but as long as he's happy.
And then there was Alan.
Well, that was a whole different kettle of fish altogether and my stomach churned at the very thought of him.
How was he going to react when I see him next week and apologise to him?
I breathed in deeply.
Oh, he'd be fine, I was sure of it. After all, he was a mature man of high standards. He wouldn't bare a grudge. I would just have to make sure that I didn't let him down with my acting when I went on set. I'd make him proud and be sure that his belief in me was truly justified.
"So". Amelia said suddenly awaking me from my thoughts, "You start filming soon then?".
"Next week". I confirmed.
" And are you very nervous?". She smiled.
I nodded my head, as I sipped some more of the bubbly stuff.
"You'll be fine". She grinned. "Like I said to you before, you'll have one of the best actors in the business looking out for you".
I looked down and gave a deep and deliberate sigh.
"I know". I agreed with her, "But it's just, well it's............."
My voice trailed away somewhat as I now began to wring my hands nervously in front of me.
Amelia's eyes suddenly widened.
"Oh my God Gwen! You're scared aren't you!". She exclaimed. "You're actually scared of doing the intimate scenes with Alan? Am I right?".
I took in a nervous breath and Amelia suddenly began to laugh.
"Oh, don't be worrying about them". She said with a dismissive wave of a hand and an air of authority, "Just draw on your own experiences, that's all. Nothing to it!".
"That's easier said than done". I answered quietly.
"At least you get to keep your clothes on". She laughed. "Not like the real thing when you worry about all your lumps and bumps and that kind of stuff".
I put my head down.
" I wouldn't know". I answered her, mumbling into my champagne as I said it. "You see I have no experience with this sort of thing."
I took in a breath.
"None whatsoever". I concluded.
A hand then reached out and touched at mine as I now felt the sting of tears prick at my eyes.
"Oh Gwen". Amelia spoke quietly, with a sudden tone of sympathy.
I looked up at her.
"So you see, I'm sort of bricking it really". I said.
She squeezed my hand.
"To tell you the truth Gwen, it really does not matter a jot if you're not experienced with that sort of thing. Alan, I'm sure will help you out and everyone else will as well". She soothed.
"I do hope so. I'm pretty ok with everything else..............its just those scene's". I breathed.
"Oh, I shouldn't worry yourself too much about it, I mean You've done those sort of scenes before, you know on the stage and in front of an audience". Amelia smiled. "So all you have to do is just pretend that Alan is Marcus or something".
I shook my head vigorously from side to side.
" That is really not at all possible" I answered, watching as Amelia gulped down some more of her champagne.
She then looked at me curiously and tilted her head to one side.
"And why on earth is that?" She asked.
For the second time that afternoon I was about to open up my heart and soul to the way I had been so secretly feeling. Exposing myself in this way was not something I had ever been used to experiencing and now I was faced with doing it yet again.
I took a gulp and looked hard at the expectant expression on the face of my very good friend, and took a deep breath.
"You see Amelia, well the fact of the matter is" I began.
I took another deep breath.
"I'm going to find those scenes with Alan extremely difficult......because......well you see......I've......I've"
I now took the biggest of breaths, before concluding:
"I've actually fallen in love with him".