Dedicated to 1DLightsUpMyWorld for making me the new cover! Thx!
Liam's POV
He surprised me with his kiss. But I went with it. Not only because I liked it, but it felt like he needed something out of that kiss. I couldn't bring myself to pull away, or to stop moving my lips against his. It wasn't filled with passion, it was sweet and comforting, somehow. Maybe that was what he was looking for, comfort.
It was only when Niall came home, slamming the door behind him that I came to my senses. We both pulled back at the same time, our faces equally flushed as Niall stuck his head around the corner of the living room door.
“Hey guys. Just came home to get a change of clothes. Going clubbin' with Harry and Zayn. Don't wait up for me.”
“Have fun Ni!” I replied. “Are you...”
“Yes Liam, I'm going to college tomorrow, don't worry, I won't waste my chance on a proper education.” he yelled back, already on his way to his bedroom. Louis chuckled lightly at that, making a flutter arise in my chest. At least he was smiling again.
We just laid there, not daring to look each other in the eyes, but not wanting to let each other go either, waiting for the front door to close again, signalling Niall had left.
“Listen Lou, I'm...”
“Shhh.” he cut me off, putting his finger on my lips. “I don't know what this was, and at this moment I refuse to break my head over it, okay? I just know it felt good, and I needed it to feel better. So thanks.”
I nodded, a bit overwhelmed with the intense look in his still moist blue eyes.
Nothing much changed over the next two or three weeks, apart from his appearance. He looked healthier, not as tired and he smiled a lot more, obviously feeling more comfortable around the four of us. The second time Zayn had been over to our flat, he had pulled me into the kitchen, questioning if Zayn knew about his past. I told him I had never thought it necessary to tell him, since he was taking a new start anyway. He just nodded, his eyes a bit moist before pulling me into a warm hug and whispering a small thank you.
We woke up together almost every morning, no matter if we went to bed separately. I didn't always notice him crawling into my bed, but I always woke up in his warm embrace, our legs entangled.
Louis' POV
I didn't feel like trying to get to sleep in my own room tonight, since I never succeeded anyway, and if I did, I would wake up after a few hours. Whenever I slept on my own, I would dream about heroin, about the things I'd done to get it or the things I knew I had lost forever by taking that road. I didn't wake Liam up any more before crawling into his bed. I would just lift his cover and slip underneath, and as soon as I laid my head on his pillow, his arm would slip around my waist, pulling me close to him. We hadn't kissed again. I had said I didn't want to break my head over it, and I tried real hard to stick with that. But I still felt the same way when he watched me, or smiled at me, or pulled me close, either consciously, or while sleeping. I felt safe with him, more than ever.
I had noticed how he looked at me sometimes, when he thought I didn't see. Or how he stroked my hair in the morning, thinking I was still asleep. I saw Niall or Harry smirk knowingly as Liam and I cuddled up on the couch while watching a movie, or just talking. We talked mostly about his life, about college, his family, high school. I didn't feel ready yet to talk about my past, afraid I wouldn't be able to stay strong if I told it.
But like I said, I didn't bother with going to my own room, following Liam into his as we had turned off the TV. Niall and Harry were at Harry's flat, having dinner with Harry's sister I believe. I pulled off my pants and my shirt, and slipped under the covers. I had stopped wearing pyjama pants since I found them utterly annoying, and Liam obviously didn't mind me sleeping in my boxers. He had stopped wearing T-shirts himself, which made the cuddling into his chest even better.
“Li?”
“Hmmm?” he replied, already sounding half asleep.
“I think I'll go looking for a job tomorrow.”
“Really? Are you up to it? I mean, you don't have to worry about the money or something, I'm perfectly fine paying your share of the food and the rent was already shared between Niall and I anyway.”
“I want it Liam. I can't keep living off you guys forever. I feel better and more confident, and I'm not planning on taking a job as a dealer or something, so I should be fine.”
“Fine, but just know that you really don't have to do it for me, or Niall for that matter.”
“I know. But I'll pay you back for my clothes and the other stuff as soon as possible.”
“Don't you worry about that Lou. It's not like I drained my college fund to buy them or something.”
“It's the least I can do. I won't ever be able to thank you for all the non-material things you've done so far.”
He pulled back, pulling my chin up so I looked him in the eye. “I did that because I wanted to, you don't owe me anything.”
“I do, Liam.” I got entranced by the sincere look in his big brown eyes, I just couldn't help it. My face moved closer to his, my lips touching his once again. It wasn't like fireworks exploding all over my body like you read in all those stories, but it felt wonderful, a warmth spreading throughout my body as I moved my lips against his.
“No, Louis, don't.” he gasped as he pulled away, leaving me confused. And hurt.
“Sorry.” I whispered. “I thought...”
“You don't need to do that Louis, you don't have to repay me for all this by kissing me, or any other physical pleasures for that matter.”
“What?” He thought I was kissing him because I felt like I owed him?
“Yes, I like you, a lot actually. But I understand that this is too much for you to deal with right now, so let's just keep it friendly for now,”
I cut him off. “Liam, you're right, I don't want to think about all of it, but I do know what I feel, and I'm not doing this out of guilt or to pay off a debt. I'm doing this because I want to. Because I feel safe when I'm with you. Because I like how you look at me and how it makes me feel when you touch me. Because I feel at home when I kiss you.”
He just laid there, watching me with his big brown bambi-eyes. I couldn't read the emotions whirling around in them, so I decided to continue.
“I don't want to think about it Liam, but please let me do what I feel like doing. If you want me doing them, at least.” I added, a bit anxious about his reply.
“Oh Lou...” he sighed, falling silent for a few seconds before he put his hand on my cheek, rubbing his thumb along it while bringing it closer to his.
I felt goosebumps erupt on my arms and my back as his lips crashed on mine, the kiss more passionate than our first one, not only comforting but also expressing the need we both felt.
Niall's POV
The change wasn't all that abrupt. They had been cuddling up together more and more, looking sweetly and longingly at each other, thinking nobody else could see. Liam had told me how Lou crawled into his bed every single night, and at first I was worried about him getting hurt, but I could see how Louis was sincere about his feelings and about staying clean, soon earning my trust and Harry's as well.
As I came home that afternoon, about a week before Christmas, I noticed something different though. They sat even closer, and I could've sworn they had been kissing, both of their lips slightly swollen.
“Hey Niall!” Liam exclaimed, sounding a bit out of breath. I supposed I wasn't interrupting too much since both of their clothes were still were they should've been.
“Ello guys. What's new?”
“I've got a job at the bakery around the corner of your college!” Louis chirped.
“Cool. When are you starting?”
“After New Years. You could come down for lunch every day, it'll be fun!” he added.
I smiled at him, pleased that his life started to take a bit more form.
The next two weeks were basically filled with a lot of studying for our exams, Liam and I mostly locked into our rooms as Louis played housewife, cleaning and cooking for us. We both had decided not to go home for the holidays as it would mean losing too much precious study-time and we didn't want to leave our boyfriends behind. Not that Liam put it that way though, they hadn't made anything official.
On Christmas Eve, we had a small birthday party for Louis, who seemed utterly pleased with the small gifts we'd gotten him. Zayn bought him a couple of cinema tickets, Harry and I went with a framed drawing of Harry's and a striped hoodie, as we had discovered Lou's love for striped clothes by now. Liam got him a giftbox for a day away in some sauna-complex. Very boyfriendish, but still, not a word from them.
It wasn't until we all went out to see the fireworks at the London Eye that they kissed in front of us. Zayn had taken his girlfiend Helen, who he was dating for about a month now, and then the four of us. We'd taken ourselves a bottle of champaign and some plastic glasses and went to sit down in the grass around 11pm, chatting pleasantly and watching other people arrive to count down to the new year. It was incredibly loud, as usual, when people were counting down the last seconds of 2012. What a year had it been, I had finally asked Harry out, leaving us to celebrate our first anniversary in a couple of days, Liam had found himself someone, or so we all suspected, and we'd welcomed Louis into our little circle. I was quite sure his next year was about to start off better than the last one.
“5, 4, 3, 2, 1, happy New Year!” I cheerily shouted along with the crowd that surrounded us, soon turning to Harry to kiss him happy new year. I felt Harry smiling into the kiss, and pulling away a little sooner than I actually liked. He nodded to Liam and Louis who were a few feet from us. I turned around to see what he was smiling about, and felt a grin tug on my lips as I saw the two of them kissing passionately. After about 30 seconds, they pulled away, both a bit out of breath, but still seemingly lost in each others eyes. It was Louis who first noticed us watching them, turning a vicious shade of red.
Liam's POV
I followed Lou's gaze as he turned away from me, finding Niall and Harry grinning their faces off.
“Feels nice huh, kissing your boyfriend first thing in the new year.” Harry winked.
“We're...” I started, only to be cut off by Louis.
“It is. Best feeling in the world.” he smiled, kissing me once more.
“We're...?” I whispered questioningly.
“Shhhh. Happy New Year, boyfriend.” he whispered back, adding a wink before kissing me again, causing a complete army of butterflies to erupt in my belly. Completely smitten was an understatement by now.
Aaaawwwww this better to leave you with for now? Don't expect only fluffyness from me when I come back though, I like a bit of drama :P