Everybody started to flee the Rushdon at about 5 in the afternoon to ready themselves for the big night. The three friends, Anne, Ruby and Diana walked alongside each other, their once full baskets now light and empty. The sky was now dim since the winter made the days shorter, and the moon was slowly revealing itself in the blue skies. The three girls walked together through the woods and chatted on as they headed home.
"Oh, it was wonderful! You should have seen it, Anne. It was everything I've ever dreamed of and more!" Ruby gushed, recalling the events earlier that day.
Anne looked down at her shoes and stuffed her cold hands in her pockets. She then looked up at Ruby and smiled warmly at her, but her eyes lacked the glimmer it once had and Diana noticed. She felt so sorry for her bosom friend. She knew that no matter how much Anne denied it, she cared for Gilbert more than she let on.
Diana also knew that if Anne wasn't aware of it before, she certainly was now.
"That's amazing! I'm so happy for you, Ruby. It really was bad timing that I headed out at that time. I just decided to take in the view outside and I miss a whole lot! Please, enlighten me with all the details! Was it ever so romantic? Did time slow down as you looked into each other's eyes and felt like everyone and everything disappeared until...." Anne rambled but then started to slow down and looked at the ground. The feelings she imagined for Ruby felt awfully familiar. Then it hit her; that's what she feels when she looks at Gilbert.
What have I gotten myself into? Anne anxiously thought, the reality of her feelings for this boy suddenly striking her.
She was not sure of how she felt about Gilbert before, but now that she had witnessed him in the company of someone else's, she was certain.
She liked Gilbert Blythe.
"U-until what Anne?" Ruby asked giddily, her pink lips turning up into a small, excited smile.
Anne looked at Ruby once more. And as Anne gazed at Ruby, she realized how much Gilbert made her friend happy. The genuine happiness that was painted on Ruby's face made her heart ache and glad all at once. And as Ruby grinned at her expectantly, Anne vowed to diminish every bit of emotion she has for Gilbert Blythe.
It's better off that way.
"Until...it was just you and him." Anne finished her sentence, smiling at Ruby.
Ruby gasped. "It felt exactly like that! How did you know?"
"Uh, well. That's how they describe it in books." Anne replied. Diana observed her and immediately knew at a glance that she was lying. That's not how she knows.
"Oh." Ruby muttered, nodding to herself in understanding. "Well, it was completely wonderful! When you told me to go to Gilbert to give him some cookies, I was so excited! And nervous too! But I'm glad you did because he complimented me on my cookies. And then out of the blue, he asked me if I wanted to go to the ball with him, but before I could answer, the orchestra in the corner of the room started playing. They were just practicing but it came at a perfect timing! Then Gilbert asked for my hand, he said-he said; Ehem," Ruby excitedly narrated, imitating Gilbert's voice which made Anne laugh. "Just in case you say no, would you give me the honor- no- the pleasure of dancing with me now?" Ruby giggled. "And all I could do was nod! And so he pulled me into the middle of the dance floor and everyone started to watch us and before I knew it, everyone was cheering us on! Oh, and he was such a graceful dancer! He didn't step on my feet, not once! Then the music stopped and I pulled him into a hug and said yes, it was magical! I wish I could relive it."
Anne's face was painted with a warm smile but her heart felt heavy.
"I hope you and Gilbert have fun at the ball." Anne said.
"Oh, I sure hope so. I'm already thinking of conversation starters so there won't be any dead air between us." Ruby giggled.
"Talk about Geometry. I think he'd be interested in that." Anne suggested, looking down at her shoes planting in the snow, her mind drifting to all of the things Gilbert likes.
He likes Math and spelling, and is awfully good at them too. He likes apples and the winter. He likes books and school and...
"Oh yes! Great idea, Anne. W-what else do you think would he be interested in? I mean, you're both awfully smart so there's a good chance you like almost all the same things!" Ruby exclaimed.
"U-um...well...I guess you could talk about famous poets and--and books. Yeah, talk about Jane Eyre, do you know who that is?"
Ruby shook her head.
"Oh. Then um...talk about seasons. Tell him that winter's your favorite. He once told me that winter was his favorite season and I think he'd be happy to know you have something in common." Anne suggested.
"That a great idea, Anne! You're so smart. I don't know why you and Gilbert act like such enemies. You two seem awfully alike! Anyway, this is my stop. " Ruby said walking toward the path on the right. "Goodbye! See you later!" Ruby waved and happily skipped away.
Diana and Anne bid her goodbye and went down the left path.
At first, both of the girls walked quietly, their minds drifting off to different things. No sound but the crunch of the snow could be heard. Somehow, even without speaking, Diana and Anne both understood each other.
Diana decided to break the ice that settled between them.
"You know, Anne. For someone who despises Gilbert Blythe, you sure do know an awful lot about him." Diana said bearing her eyes into Anne's, as if digging deep. Anne was almost certain Diana could see her soul.
"W-what?" Anne managed to stutter out.
Diana smiled at her with sincerity. She pitied her bosom friend, knowing her heart ached right this moment for the boy she loathed.
"You know, I found it quite impressive that you knew exactly how Ruby felt when she danced with Gilbert. It was very particular, your description."
Anne was silent.
"Almost like....you've felt it before."
Diana noticed that Anne's shoulders tensed.
"It's all right, Anne. You can tell me."
And just like that, Anne's walls broke down. She was so relieved she had someone who understood her, someone she could trust and someone who would not judge her. Anne let out the tears she'd so long been holding back and crashed into the arms of her best friend.
"I like him, Diana. I like him! And I hate it, I hate it so much!" She cried.
Diana felt so sorry for Anne.
"Shh, it's all right. I know. I know." Diana said, patting the back of Anne's head.
Anne sniffled and pulled away from the embrace. "Y-you do?"
"Oh, Anne. We're kindred spirits! I hear the songs your heart sings and I understand you even when you don't say a word."
Anne giggled, even through the tears which caused Diana relief. "T--that was very poetic of you." Anne remarked, laughing and crying at the same time.
"Thank you! You know, I just got that out the top of my head!" Diana joked and they laughed melodically.
As they started walking, a comfortable silence settled upon them once more.
"So....how long have you known?" Anne timidly asked Diana, her pale face now hinted a tint of red.
Diana chuckled. "Anne, I've known since the day you broke your slate on that poor boy's head. The real question is, how long have you known?" Diana shot back, raising an eyebrow.
Anne sheepishly looked over at her friend. "About, 10 minutes ago?"
Both of them laughed. You see, the thing about Diana and Anne is that their souls are closely knit. You could tell just by the way they look and speak to each other that they would be friends for as long as the sun and moon shall allow.
"So...are you going to tell Gilbert? How you feel?" Diana inquired, her voice soft and gentle.
Anne sighed. "No...I-I don't...I don't know. But it's better off for everyone that I keep these emotions to myself. It will be good for Ruby, and Gilbert and--"
"What about you?"
"Especially me."
"Are you sure about that, Anne?" Diana asked, this time seriously.
Anne looked down and thought about it.
"I don't know." Anne finally answered. Truly, she did not know. Only time can tell.
"You know what I think? I think you should tell him. It shouldn't matter what other people think! They can go and be damned to hell!"
"Diana!"
"Sorry. But seriously, Anne. Isn't it about time you think about yourself for a change?"
Anne did not answer.
"And I know that you put Gilbert up to it--him asking Ruby? Please. The moment he heard about the ball, he immediately thought about you. I should know. I'm the one who told him about it!" Diana said confidently.
Anne stopped in her tracks.
"You what?"
Diana turned to face her.
"I was the one who told him about the ball! I was heading to your house that day, for tea and to tell you of the ball then our paths crossed. The second I told him about the ball, he immediately asked about you."
"W-what did he say?"
Diana smirked. "He asked if you liked dancing."
The blood rose up in Anne's ears to which Diana just smiled.
"You know, Anne. Gilbert cares about you, very very much. Truly. And I think you'd save his heart a lot of pain and suffering if you just tell him how you feel. Heaven knows how much that boy's heart has went through, with his father's death and all. I think...I think you could really do him some good." Diana smiled. "Bye Anne." And with that Anne was left with her own thoughts.
And though silence was Anne's only company, she found it to be deafening. Her thoughts came at her all at once and she did not know how to deal with them.
She sighed in exasperation.
"That's it." Anne stated firmly. "I am not going to think about any of this, at least not tonight."
And just like that, Anne decided to run away from her problems and was determined that tonight, she would enjoy herself at the winter's ball. Dance the night away until she forgets about her feelings and their consequences.
I'll keep my distance if I have to.
For one night, at long last, she thought about herself.
*****
"Matthew? Marilla? I'm home!" Anne called out as she entered her home.
"In the kitchen!" Marilla called out.
Anne hung her heavy coat on the rack and headed to the kitchen, placing down the empty basket on the counter top. "Here's the basket you lent me, Marilla."
"All empty, I see. I presume they liked your muffins?" Marilla asked looking up from the vegetables she was chopping.
But before Anne could answer, Marilla's eyebrows furrowed in concern. "What's wrong? Did something happen?" Marilla asked.
Anne tensed, her eyes grew wide.
How did she know?
"What? No, no! Why do you ask?" Anne hastily replied, her heart beating faster.
"Well your eyes look red and your face looks like all the light's been drained out of it!"
Anne rolled her eyes. "Gee, thanks."
"I'll thank you to mind your manners, lass." Marilla said shooting Anne a pointed look.
"Sorry. I'm just very tired, that's all."
Anne watched as Marilla swiftly chopped the vegetables, each slice thin and perfectly uniform.
"Marilla, was there ever a time when you wanted to get married?" Anne asked out if the blue.
Marilla stopped her work but did not look up.
"Yes, I suppose there was."
Anne sat quietly then talked once more. "You know, there was this beautiful painting at the Rushdon I saw. It was a picture of a girl and a boy looking into each other's eyes in the sunset."
"Mmhm."
"Rachel Lynde said it reminded her of you and Mr. Blythe."
This time Marilla looked up at Anne. Her face showed no expression but her eyes gave everything away.
"Was he the one you wanted to marry?" Anne asked, feeling a slight pang in her chest. She felt sorry for Marilla, and guilty for bringing it up.
Marilla was hesitant to answer but she did. "Yes." She firmly answered and went back to her work.
"What happened?" Anne asked. She didn't want to pain Marilla any further by reminding her of her tragical romance but curiosity got the best of her.
"I was needed at home." She said, not looking up. "My parents had a hard time recovering from the death of our brother and Matthew and I were direly needed by our parents. Matthew worked and I stayed at home with mother. Next thing I know, my hands and face are all tired and wrinkled. Years had passed and I didn't even notice. My entire life had slipped away." Marilla satirically chuckled and Anne's heart broke.
"But I don't blame my parents. I do admit that sometimes, my help was done with a heavy heart but I'm glad I did what I had to do. Heaven knows I'd be sleepless with all the guilt if I hadn't. I loved my parents very much but sometimes, I wonder..." Marilla looked up thoughtfully. "If I had been a little selfish. If I had obliged to John Blythe when he asked me to run away with him..."
Anne let out a small gasp, her eyes welled up with tears.
"Maybe I'd have had a different life." Marilla finished. "But I have no regrets."
Anne was speechless. She promised she wouldn't think about it but she couldn't help it. Her mind drifted off to Gilbert Blythe and how he could possibly slip away if she sacrifice her feelings for the happiness of others like Marilla had.
Would I be happy then?
Anne's mind was now even more of a mess than it was before. She could not believe how much Gilbert had an effect on her and she did not like it.
"Aren't you supposed to be preparing for the ball at Diana's?" Marilla said, changing the subject.
"Um, we decided against it since both Diana and Ruby are being walked to the ball by their partners." Anne explained, trying to clear her head.
"And what about you?"
"I don't have a pair." Anne blushed, and felt frustrated at herself for being embarrassed about going alone. Just yesterday, she went on and on about her free will and independence and resistance to societal dictation yet here she was, regretting not having a partner.
"Oh," Marilla muttered, her eyes liking else where in thought.
"What is it?" Anne asked.
"I was just certain the Gil-" Marilla looked up at Anne; bright red hair and wide, round eyes. She was so full of hope and naivety.
"Nevermind it, child. How about I help you prepare for the ball tonight, hm? I thought I'd grant you some help in getting ready. Heaven knows your clumsy hands might tear that dress apart before you even wear it." Marilla joked and Anne laughed with her.
****
"There." Marilla said as she tied a long, white lace cloth into a bow. It stood out in Anne's bright hair which had half of it tied up and the other half down, resting on Anne's back. Her hair had grown quite quickly the past year.
Marilla and Anne stared into the mirror, both of them wearing overwhelmed smiles on their faces.
"You look grand, child." Marilla said. Anne turned to face her, her eyes slightly watering. "Thank you, Marilla." Anne said, pulling Marilla into a tight embrace.
"Now go say goodbye to Matthew before you leave. He's in the barn."
Anne gave Marilla one last smile and ran out the room.
"Don't run! And be home by nine!" Marilla shouted.
"Okay!"
Marilla chuckled.
****
"Matthew?" Anne called out, pulling her gown up as she made her way though the pile of hay.
"In here!" Matthew cried out.
When Anne stood in front of Matthew, neither them spoke a word.
Anne grinned at Matthew and he stood up, his mouth slightly agape.