"Enjoy the little things in life, because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things."
I was on top of the bed, drawing more sticks on the wall with my plastic knife while I ate the food they had given me. Three days had passed since the day I had left the room, so according to my calculus, it had passed a whole week.
Miss Dorothy had already given me the lights I had asked for, which meant I could finally see more clearly. I discovered a small chair on the corner of the room and a big box with a few sheets and a small pillow inside. I grabbed the sheets since I had cut my old ones and hadn't anything to cover myself.
During the day, Mr. Colton would also appear to give me food. It was only two meals. The first one was a sandwich, water, and an apple, and although the bread seemed to be from two days ago, it tasted like chocolate cake in my head. The second one was some weird soup. It was awful, completely disgusting. Yet, I'd always force myself to eat it.
I was becoming thinner each passing day, and I didn't want to be unhealthy or sick. So, as soon as I began to eat, I'd always close my eyes and imagine it was a huge burger and fries. It worked because I managed to eat all of it.
I had also created a type of schedule with my routine to do certain things. It was the only way I had found to keep the darkness away. The only way to keep my sanity. The truth was that being locked in this room, without knowing if it was morning, afternoon or evening, was slowly driving me insane. So I decided I had to make some kind of schedule that would keep me busy and entertained.
The first thing I tried not to do but was almost impossible was sleep. Every time I slept I was haunted by nightmares. I dreamt about being killed by this people, never returning home, being locked in this hell hole for the rest of my life...
Sometimes I even dreamt about Vince killing Isaac in the woods. However, in my dream, instead of Isaac it was me he was killing. In my dream, he left me on the ground looking at the sky with dead eyes, the cold smacking my body, the darkness as my only company. It was frightful and I would always end up having a panic attack every time that happened.
Yet, the worst of all weren't those nightmares, but the dreams about my family. They were definitely the worst because when I dreamt about them, it was like everything became more real, making it impossible to run from reality. They were also the worst because every time I saw them, it was impossible to make them go away, leaving me crying on the floor until the end of my tears.
But I couldn't lose hope. I had to be brave and stronger than I had ever been in my entire life. So every time that happened, I would always force myself to stop. I would repeat, over and over again in my head, that I would return home. That this was just an obstacle I had to face before everything went back like it used to be.
Nevertheless, I made my best not to sleep and tried to find other things, things I thought I would never do.
First of all, I would make exercise, which I always hated. But it helped me since my mind was focused on the effort of my body and not on the shadows around me. It was usually simple exercises, some push ups, squats and skipping since I couldn't run in this tight room. I would also play a game where I would make questions to myself. I would ask what was my name, how old I was, the name of all the members of my family, which was my favorite book, color, food, music...
That silly game had been my only way to never forget who I was. The only way to remind me of the real me. I would also think about Biology and the things I had learned in school and with life itself. It was a bit stupid, but thinking about those things prevented me from thinking about others.
Even so, I couldn't help myself from asking about the purpose of school. I had never questioned the importance of it before. I knew it was important and that it was our only way to become someone in life. But now, being here, closed in this room and far away from reality, I was starting to have doubts about it.
We spent most of our days closed in classrooms, learning new things and preparing ourselves for the exams. Still, nobody ever taught us what to do if anything like this happened. Nobody taught us how we should act, how to stop the fear and think clearly. We didn't learn how to stay calm and strong. They just taught us things that weren't necessary at this moment.
I knew I was being silly. I knew it was my desperation talking, but I just couldn't help it! I didn't know what to do and I wished anyone had taught me. But then again, nobody in their right mind would prepare people for something like this. We all think these things only happen to other people. It's our way to protect ourselves. I used to think like that too, until the day I knew I was wrong...
I diverted my eyes from the wall, finishing eating that awful soup. I looked at the hole in the opposite wall, feeling a weight in my heart. During these past few days, I had never seen Hannah again. I called her many times, but she never answered. I needed someone to talk to, now more than ever. I had never felt so lonely in my entire life.
I also never saw Vince since the day he gave me that photo. He never visited me again and a part of me was very relieved that he didn't. I didn't know if I could trust him, not like I trusted Hannah anyway. And those horrible nightmares didn't help me either. However, his words didn't leave my head and sometimes I found myself looking at my photo.
Because this is our only way to survive.
When did my goal of life stop being: living life at the fullest to just survive? I wanted my life back! I wanted everything to be like it used to, even the little things I didn't give much attention before. Like when my father would kiss my forehead, or when my mother would cook the most wonderful dinner. I even missed the times when my brother would piss me off, or when my sister would turn my room upside down.
I laid on the bed, feeling waves of sadness surrounding me. I had already done everything on my schedule, everything but sleep. I didn't want to, but I knew I needed it. I had to rest, gain forces to wake up again. I closed my eyes and hoped this time I would be able to rest without waking up from my worst nightmares...
...
A light hitting my face made me open my eyes, only to find a little boy carrying a lamp. The boy was very small and had lots of blonde hair falling over his eyes. He also appeared to be between seven or eight years old, but I wasn't sure because he was very small for that age.
I almost gasped when I saw the color of his eyes. It was a very pale blue, almost gray. I had never seen eyes like that before. They were absolutely stunning.
"Hi there, my name is Kelly. What's your name?" I asked him, adjusting my messy hair as I sat.
"Kelly? I thought your name was Jane." He said, furrowing his small eyebrows. His voice was calm, almost like a melody. You could hear the confusing on it though.
"My name is Kelly, not Jane. They call me that, but that's not my real name," he seemed even more confused, so I added. "Here between us, you can call me Kelly, okay?"
He seemed to understand what I said because he nodded, climbing up to my bed. He was now sat beside me and I could hear his calm heartbeat.
"My name is Thomas." He said, looking around my room. "I saw you a few days ago. You were following my mom to your room, right?"
My heart skipped a beat when he said mom, making my breath get caught in my throat. The way his voice sounded so straight and honest made me wondered if Miss Dorothy was really his mother. However, soon enough, I pushed that possibility away. It was impossible. She was far too old.
Instead, I asked myself how the hell he could believe she was his mother.
He must be in here for many years to think that way. But then again, he was just a child, and being here - locked in a house with people that claimed to be his parents - far away from his real family must have confused him. Or maybe he was kidnapped when he was very young. Maybe he was a baby and could not know the difference between what was real and what was not.
I stared at Thomas. He was so young, so innocent... He didn't deserve this. He should be playing with his friends and laughing like a normal child right now.
And by looking at him, I felt anger, so much anger. I wanted to destroy that crazy bitch and her husband for doing this. I wanted them to suffer for all the bad things they had done. I pushed that feeling away so it wouldn't blind me and take control over my actions. That would be letting them win this battle and I couldn't let that happen. I wouldn't.
"Are you alright, Jane? I mean... Kelly."
"Yes, Thomas. I was just thinking about something, never mind..." I mumbled. He smiled at me then, showing some fallen tooth. I couldn't stop myself from smiling as well. It wasn't a real smile, it was more like a ghost of a smile, but even so, it was the first time I smiled since I got here.
"You are really pretty, Kelly." He said, a little embarrassed, his cheeks blushed red.
"Thank you, Thomas. You're really cute too."
Suddenly, he lied down on my lap, his head on top of my legs. It was the first time I was having human contact with someone since a long time. It felt good... Almost like I wasn't lonely anymore, like the pain I felt had become less unbearable, leaving me with a peaceful sensation. He was quiet for a while and I thought he was sleeping when he suddenly asked.
"What's your favorite meal, Kelly?" I was a little taken aback by his question but answered it anyway.
"I don't really have one. I like everything. What about you? What's your favorite?" I asked him, caressing his messy, yet soft hair.
"Even vegetables?" He asked, and I nodded. "I hate it! My favorite meal is definitely chocolate." He said, giggling.
"Really? You know that chocolate isn't really considered a meal, don't you? It's more like a dessert, a sweet."
"Maybe... But I love it anyway." He looked at me, his eyes suddenly shining with something new. "There was a day, when mom, Allison, Vince and I went shopping to get groceries. It was my favorite day of all because mom bought me a big tablet of chocolate." He told me, smiling with a nostalgic expression. I couldn't help noticing that he referred Hannah as Allison, the name they had given her.
His eyes were still shining, probably from remembering that day, and I could only ask myself how a boy could say his favorite day was when his mom bought him a tablet of chocolate. Something so simple, so little, and yet he said it like it was the most wonderful thing that had ever happened to him.
"Wait! You said you went shopping, didn't you?" Thomas nodded, furrowing his small eyebrows, "So you left the house?"
"Y-yes, but that just happens sometimes, when it's really necessary or when mom is happy." He explained. An idea crossed my mind. Maybe if I got to leave the house I could escape. It could be my only chance.
"Kelly, I'm tired. Can I sleep here with you?" He whispered, his eyes begging.
"Of course you can," I said, but then I thought about the risk of someone finding him here and something bad happening. I didn't say anything. I didn't want him to leave. I didn't want to be alone. So I forced myself to close my eyes and tried to rest, feeling Thomas on my lap, sleeping peacefully...
I was in this hell room, looking up at the ceiling when someone opened the door. It was Miss Dorothy, but she wasn't alone. Someone was behind her. Someone I knew. Someone who shouldn't be here. When I saw who it was, my heart stopped.
It couldn't be... This couldn't be happening.
"Jane, is everything alright? You seem a bit shaken." Miss Dorothy teased me. I noticed the pleasure in her eyes. She was loving this.
The girl behind her stared at me with her giant blue eyes, just like the ocean. However, they weren't shiny and bright like they used to be. They were dark like black shadows were haunting them.
"Sarah!" I yelled. I ran towards her.
My sister was here. My sister was here. My sister was here.
"If I were you, I wouldn't do that." She warned me, grabbing my arm to stop me from moving any further.
"Let go of me!" I shouted, struggling to get free from her grip. "What did you do to her? I will kill you if you touch her! It's a promise, you hear me? Now let go of me!" I demanded, but she didn't release my arm. She wouldn't let go of my arm. Instead, she pushed me away.
Immediately, I fell down on the ground, causing a horrible and hurt sound to fly sharply in the air. She smiled evilly at me, turning around to face my little sister.
My sister. My Sarah. Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.
"Jessica, I think it's time to go now. Your sister isn't feeling very well at the moment." She said, calling her by another name, just like she had done to me.
No. No. No. No.
"I think Jane needs to be alone, don't you think, darling?" Sarah instantly nodded her head, completely and utterly terrified. "Let's go then. Today I will take care of you."
She began to leave, heading towards the door with my sister in her arm.
"No! No, Sarah!" I yelled loudly, trying to stop them, but it was too late...
"Kelly, Kelly! Wake up!" Someone yelled, shaking my shoulders uncontrollably.
I opened my eyes, feeling tears blurring my vision. My body was shaking and my hands were tightly clenched on the sides of the bed. My breathing was uncontrolled, making hard to lead enough air to my lungs.
It was just a nightmare Kelly, just a nightmare... I repeated over and over again, forcing myself to sit down and finding Thomas just a few steps away from me.
"You were yelling and I didn't know what to do, so I woke you up. I'm so sorry, Kelly. Please don't get mad." Thomas begged me. He was hugging himself like a shell and he seemed really scared. I didn't know what was happening. Why was he saying sorry? He didn't do anything wrong.
I got up from the bed, startling him. I pushed him against me, to hug him. His body was shaking and although he was extremely cold, it wasn't because of that. It was fear. Fear was causing his trembling, and when he tried to get free from my arms I instantly realized why.
It was me. Thomas was afraid of me, afraid that I might hurt him.
"It's okay, Thomas. I'm not going to hurt you." I assured him, making my best to sound calm and keeping my voice from cracking. Thomas was still not corresponding to the embrace, shaking and trying to get free, so I pulled away, facing him. "You don't have to be scared. You're safe here. I'm not going to do hurt you, Thomas. I will never do that."
He looked at me, and I nodded my head to show him that I didn't have bad intentions, that all I wanted to do was comfort him. His eyes softened when he finally realized I wouldn't hurt him, and the trembling slowly faded away.
"I'm sorry." He then whispered.
Why did he keep saying that? He didn't have to be sorry. He didn't do anything wrong.
"You don't have to be sorry, Thomas. You did what was right, it's over now. You don't need to be scared." I told him, hugging him again, and this time he corresponded, placing his small arms around me.
He was freezing, so I pressed him closer against me, rubbing his hair with my fingers like I usually did with my sister when she was sad about something. That thought made me remember the nightmare. I pushed it away.
"Thomas, it's okay. I'm okay now. You don't have to be sorry." I said, hoping he would stop shaking. He didn't answer and instead, he rested his head on my chest, nestling against me.
I was starting to say something when the door suddenly opened. It was the bastard with my tray of food, and when he saw us, his face instantly changed. His features hardened, making his eyes sparkle with anger.
"What are you doing here?!" He asked in a demanding voice, his eyes fixed on Thomas. Fear squeezed my throat tight as Thomas's heartbeat speeded up. His body started shaking again, but now it wasn't because of me. It was because of him.
"Answer me, Thomas!" He roared, and this time I seriously thought he would hit him with the intensity in his voice and the furious look on his eyes. Thomas didn't answer, still frozen in my arms. I thought he had stopped breathing because of so still he had suddenly become.
"W-we were just talking. He didn't do anything wrong." I tried to reason with him.
If he wanted to get mad, he would get mad, but not with Thomas. Not with Thomas.
However, I couldn't prevent my voice from sounding nervous and scared, and when his mean eyes landed on me I had to look away.
I tried to calm my fast breathing. I tried to recover the control over my legs that seemed to be one step ahead from letting me fall. I tried to stay strong.
"I wasn't talking to you!" He shouted, and his voice was like a lash on the flesh. Thomas jumped on my arms, and I squeezed my grip even more, doing my best to keep him close to me.
Maybe, it was because he reminded me of my sister. Maybe, because it was the human thing to do. Either way, I felt like I could never let him go.
After a while, the bastard took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He placed the tray on the ground.
"Thomas, go to your room. Now!" He demanded. Thomas looked at me with his astonishing gray eyes, like he was trying to say something. "Don't make me repeat myself!"
Thomas winced and began to get away from me. I didn't want to let him go, but I had no other option. After a while, the bastard went too, leaving me alone again.
As soon as the door closed I let myself fall on the bed, my back against the wall, my head running in circles.
What the hell just happened? Why was he so angry with Thomas being here? It wasn't like we were doing anything wrong.
I was so stupid! This could have been avoided if I had heard my instinct. But no, I didn't want to be alone and now that bastard could be hurting Thomas, and there wasn't anything I could do to stop it.
And then that nightmare! It was so real. I could still see Sarah and the terrified look on her face. That bitch called her Jessica and said she would take care of her. Just thinking about her doing the same things she had done to me to my little sister... It made want to, to...
I tried to calm myself. Slow down. I tried to keep myself together. I did. I did. But the look on Thomas' eyes when he was shaking in my arms, and the fear when he saw his 'supposed' dad wouldn't leave my head.
What if I didn't see him again like Hannah never saw Isaac since that day? What if they get rid of him?
Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.
I started screaming, as loud as I could. Every unfair thing that had happened to me, all my despair, all my unshed tears, all the pain and the fear, it was all wrapped in that scream.
Why didn't I say no? Why didn't I say he couldn't be here, that he should leave? I was so reckless.
I was shaking now, feeling the black weight settling over me. I tried to fight it, to keep it from crushing me, but it was too late. A strong pain in the back of skull made me realized I was smacking my head repeatedly on the concrete wall.
I stopped it, yet when I placed my hand over my hair I felt panic growing inside me.
Oh God, what have I done?
My fingers were covered in blood... My blood. I placed them over my head, again and again, to see if it had stopped. It didn't, and it seemed like it wouldn't stop soon enough.
Breathe Kelly, breathe...
I looked around, trying to find something to stop the bleeding. The sheets. Yes, that was a good idea. I grabbed my plastic knife and cut them into shreds. Then, I wrapped them around my hair, making some kind of band-aid.
It hurt so much. I couldn't even see properly anymore. I rest on the mattress, feeling the dark slowly surround me. I was losing consciousness and I knew it was a bad sign, but I couldn't stop it. I was too weak to fight back.
The sound of someone opening the door, running in my direction and yelling my name was the last thing I heard before I lost consciousness.
Author's Note: ________________________________________
Hi everyone! I hope u like this chapter. Meanwhile, tell me everything about it and thanks for reading! <3
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