Xiao Yan knew the consequences of his choice.
The thing was, he wasn't nearly as forgetful as he pretended to be. He would always remember Lily's pleading eyes as she begged him not to abandon her.
If he left her behind, he would never sleep again.
He recalled his father telling him that death will come regardless of fear, but one cannot allow that fear to invite shame.
Shame lasts a lifetime, a burden more difficult to bear than death.
For such a weak woman, Xiao know how stupid his decision was.
But Lily is not just a weak woman to Xiao, she is his secret crush.
Xiao Yan headed back for Lily.
He entered the Academy of Science at age 17. Academics and research was never the world that the longed for and he often felt suffocated by it. Perhaps Lily was superficial and weak , but she was the brightest hope in his mediocre life.
She was huddled against the wall sobbing, her knees were pulled up tight against her chest. The zombies were not far from where she cowered.
Xiao stepped forward and picked her up.
He spoke harshly, his expression vicious.
"Get up!"
Lily stared at Xiao too horrified to speak, she never imagined that he would return for her.
Waiting for death was just wallowing in fear. Even though he was exhausted he would rather run as long as he could.
Behind them numerous zombies gave chase. They grabbed at Lily's arms then gripped onto Xiao's shoulders, pulling him down to the ground.
Xiao Yan closed he eyes as he fell, he clutched Lily tightly and she grasped his wrist.
They held their breath and waited for the most painful moment of death to arrive.
But the agony of being torn apart never came.
Xiao Yan only felt a cold wind sweep past his ear and when he opened his eyes he saw the sharp edge of Heine's blade.
"Go. If you can't keep up, I won't stop again." Heine's eyes blazed with a wrath that was just barely restrained. Xiao Yan was shocked.
The ruthless god of life and death had returned.
Xiao Yan was still digesting this moment. Heine's actions are an impossible compromise for him.
The hatred exploding from his eyes was clear, his indifferent mask was cracked completely open.
Lily looked up, but her breath rushed out as she saw Heine's ferocious gaze.
Xiao Yan looked at the determination in Heine's eyes. This man would never give up at the last minute. For the first time Xiao Yan was upset at his analysis of the situation.
He really gave up way too easily!
Giving up is not an accurate assessment of a situation, it is a weakness.
On the way back, they broke through to the front but the zombies were catching up. Heine gripped his sword tightly and used it to gesture at Xiao Yan.
"Go."
He is going to take the rear.
Xiao looked at Heine's back as he walked. Pure steadiness smoothed his steps, there was not a trace of hesitation.
No matter what disaster befalls him, this man will make it out alive and he will never doubt his own power.
Seeing several zombies grab at Xiao Yan, Heine quickly turned back and gave Lily a heavy stare.
Then he swept his right hand, and the zombies fell to pieces beneath his blade.
As they ran, the passage began to slope. Xiao Yan frowned as saw it. He knew the floor plan of all the bases, most of the channel connections are t-shaped.
The passage is warping because of the damage from the missile; the blast must have compromised the integrity of the building.
There was a loud thunderous boom and the ground slanted even more.
The floor was about to give.
"Lily!" Xiao Yan suddenly stopped in front of Lily.
He had a bad feeling...
Suddenly the whole passage broke open. The floor split and both Lily and Xiao Yan fell to the ground, sliding down the incline. It all happened too fast, they didn't have time to brace for the fall. As they were about to tumble through, Xiao Yan grabbed at a jagged piece of metal on the floor. The sharp edges slashed through his fingers, laying open the muscle. Lily dropped through, but she grabbed on to Xiao Yan's legs before falling all the way down.
Underneath them is the ground floor of the base, it is several stories down. Countless zombies, that have fallen, jump up to try to grab them if they lose their grip.
With barely any energy to spare Xiao Yan's face was red, his finger's whitened and the blood was gathering in his arm. His shoulders strain and scream.
"Lily hang on. Do you understand? If you let go, then I will let go." Xiao Yan tied her life to his to ensure she didn't give up.
Lilly looked up at Xiao's trembling shoulders and swallowed hard. He looked down at her, his face shadowed and serious as he spoke.
Lily's responded with a defeated tone.
"I'm going to let go Xiao Yan. Get ready, you must climb up."
"No! If you let go, I will let go! I haven't reached the point where I can leave anyone!"
Lily smiled sadly. "I think death is fast and there is nothing to fear."
At that moment, Xiao Yan felt that the weight on his leg disappear.
Lily released her grip and began to fall down.
"Lily !" Xiao Yan's heart is about to explode.
The zombie's eyes widened, their faces twisted in hideous bloodthirsty expressions.
Lily looked at Xiao Yan, as if she could bravely accept everything.
A rope swung down and wrapped around Lily's waist.
The rope lifted and took her away just as the zombies were about to seize her.
Xiao Yan looked up and saw a figure standing straight and tall, the light filtered behind him magnifying his arrogant posture. Xiao Yan felt all his blood come rushing back.
Lily slammed on the ground, and the rope around her waist was instantly pulled away.
Just as Xiao Yan lost his strength, a hand clamped around his wrist. Xiao Yan's eyes were fixed onto Burton, and his cold gaze was shadowed with a murderous rage. It spread across his features, etching the lines of his face and deepening his features.
Heine hauled him up and he crashed into his arms, it all felt like a tremendously fatal illusion.
Without a word, Heine sheathes his weapon and puts Xiao Yan and Lily on his shoulders bounding back in no more than three or four steps.
When Lily saw what he was about to do, she began to shout loudly.
Xiao Yan's heart was unexpectedly calm.
Heine runs at a speed that Xiao didn't realize was possible and leapt into the air. It reminded Xiao Yan of the time he touched the ocean, the sensation of being absolutely free.
In front of his eyes are the numerous faces of crazed zombies, but it all blurred and pushed into the background as though it were an unrelated event.
All that existed in that moment was Heine Burton.
Xiao knew he would not let him fall, just like every other time Heine had taken to the air.
Heine landed firmly on the other side of the channel, the vibration from his landing halting their breath. He threw them both off of his shoulders and Lily wobbled as she tried to stand.
She couldn't believe that Heine Burton jumped a distance of four to five meters.
"Before you die of blood loss, we have to get to the refuge passage."
Heine angled his head and glanced at Xiao's bleeding hands, moving steadily.
Xiao Yan felt the pain in that moment, but he merely shook his head at Lily and the two continued to follow behind Burton.
They finally reached the passage. The fist door opened and they rushed in. Several zombies followed but were easily dispatched, courtesy of Heine.
He sheathed his blade.
They were still separated from the refuge by another door, Lily was panting heavily.
Xiao Yan leaned against the door and watched the sturdy straight lines of Heine's back as though he were just meeting him. His posture looked so arrogant and determined.
The inner door opened and Liv and Mark rushed out.
"Boss!"
"Yea" Heine said loudly, suddenly he grabbed Xiao Yan by the wrist and threw him at Liv.
"Handle his wounds."
Mark looked at Xiao Yan, showing an incredible expression.
"Boss...You did all this for a stupid rookie..."
Liv hit mark, "Enough Mark!"
"How do we deal with the wound? You want us to kiss him or..."
Mark's words were not yet out of his mouth when Liv kicked in his knees, the big guy was almost kneeling on the floor.
Xiao Yan took a deep breath and stepped into the underground level of Base.
He is still breathing...His eyes can still see the back of that person... His brain is still thinking.
He is still alive.
Xiao Yan's body wobbles, and before him are countless officers who are busy dealing with the aftermath of the attack.
Shen Bing's forehead is still seeping blood, but he is already standing in front of the holographic screen putting order to everything.
Heine and his subordinates are planning their next action. The profile of Heine catches Xiao's gaze and an odd pain gathers in his chest.
Liv sat in front of Xiao Yan and worked on his wounds. She disinfected the area and wrapped it with a medical bandage. The wrapping is clear and adheres to the skin instantly, isolating the wounded area. The sterilized wrapping allows enough permeability for oxygen exchange.
"Does it still hurt?" Liv asked with a chuckle.
"The most painful time is over." Xiao Yan smile is a bit strained.
"I really did not expect the boss to save you. When the base is in jeopardy his duty is to ensure the safety of the commander."
Xiao Yan sat there, stunned at the news.
"Don't give me such a look. This doesn't mean that he compromised his principles or forgot his duties just for you. Had it been me or Mark trapped, he would have done the same."
Xiao Yan guessed that Liv was trying to tell him that he shouldn't feel special. She clarified with her next statement.
"What this means, is you are no longer free to give up."
Xiao Yan's heart sped up radically.
Looks like he wouldn't be returning to God for a long while.
Liv fell silent as she finished taking care of Xiao Yan's wounds.
Xiao Yan gathered from the officers talking that the base had given up the ground levels and would continue operation from underground. The Shire would dispatch an aircraft to supply the base with construction material to assist in the ventilation while Heine's troops would secure a perimeter around the base.
After the wound was wrapped, Liv stood up and pointed at his cheek.
Xiao felt around his face, his hands coming up dirtied with various fluids from the zombies. The stickiness adhering to his fingers was nauseating.
"There are disinfecting station in the rooms over there. You can wash it off. If it stays in contact with the skin for a prolonged period of time it is corrosive."
"Thank you."
Liv didn't say anything, but Xiao Yan felt his face start to itch and burn so he headed over to the rooms Liv had pointed to.
Xiao Yan entered a disinfection station, the entire space was filled with a milky white vapor. His vision was instantly obscured by the mist. The process was simple, all one needed to do was walk through the area and the vapor would remove the filth from his skin and clothing as he passed through.
Xiao Yan's felt the itchiness gradually dissipate. Every time he closed his eyes he saw zombies lunging at him and the soothing sinewy line of Heine's back.
His fingers began to tremble, he clenched his fists but the feelings still sliced at his heart.
As he proceeded further in the room, he bumped into someone.
"Oh , I'm sorry! I didn't think there was anyone else here!"
Xiao Yan rubbed his forehead and the person he bumped into turned around slowly.
Xiao Yan was met with the deeply etched features of Heine Burton.
Xiao Yan was stunned, "...Colonel Burton..."
Heine sharp features were diffused against the mist in the room, giving his appearance a surreal impression. Of course it would be Heine Burton. With his obsession with cleanliness the first thing he would want to do after saving Xiao Yan was get into the disinfection room.
"I'm sorry ... Colonel!" Although he was still pressing against him , Xiao Yan couldn't help but say these words that held such an import in his heart.
"Where are you sorry for?" Heine's tone held no indication of emotion, as though Xiao Yan's apology meant nothing to him.
Xiao Yan opened his mouth but found he was unable to say a word.
Sorry, I chose Lily.
Xiao Yan felt ridiculous saying it out loud. Why would Heine care that he chosen Lily, he had no relationship with him.
Or Should I say I'm sorry, I wasted your chance to save me?
Or I am sorry I made you return for me again and again, even questioning your ability to protect me.
As Xiao Yan was contemplating this matter, Heine had already turned away. His figure gradually retreating into the milky vapor.
Xiao Yan grimaced and bowed his head, a helpless smile slowly painting his features.
Inside him there was a growing giddy and weightless feeling.
He wants to reach higher, and step from behind Heine. He wants to be strong, even if Heine doesn't look back at him he knows that he is behind him.
The figure in the white mist stopped.
"If I didn't catch you, would you have let go?"
The steel in his voice seemed to slice apart the vapor in the room.
"No one wants to die..." Xiao Yan did not expect that Heine would ask him such a question.
Heine took two powerful steps forward and lifted his arms, those slender and elegant fingers wrapped Xiao Yan's neck with measured force. He could crush his throat with a mere twitch of his finger.
"Remember this, unless it is by my hand, you cannot die. Not here, not anywhere."
His words were concise and intensely pressured. Xiao Yan felt his command brand so deeply into his mind a million years couldn't erase it.
"The next time you tell me to let you go, I will break your neck."
In that moment Xiao Yan has a vague feeling that hiding within Heine's indifference is something immensely complex.
He stared at his reflection, etched so clearly in those bottomless blue eyes.
"So don't be so full of yourself." The sentence is said so lightly that Xiao Yan cannot discern the meaning behind it.
"Maybe you will be the one to die." Xiao Yan wants to shift forward and look closely at the other person's expression, but Heine Burton's sense of oppression is heavy.
His legs are weighted with lead.
Since you are indifferent to everything, why would you save me?
"We will all die, sooner or later."
It seems there is nothing in this world that can scare Heine Burton, even death must submit to his will.
Xiao Yan couldn't bring himself to look away, despite the fact the angry Heine could break his neck with the smallest of muscle movements.
Eventually Heine's grip on Xiao lifted and he brought his hand up to his cheek. His touch was so light, his fingers barely grazed his flesh, but he felt the contact as intensely as if it were a branding iron.
Heine leaned toward him and his golden hair drifted close to Xiao Yan's gaze. He knew that he should avoid the movement but when that cold and elegant face approached him, he found his limbs paralyzed and his blood frantically burned.
Heine tongue slowly licked Xiao Yan's upper lip, he went to step back when Heine's fingers sank into his hair gripping him and he couldn't move.
Heine's mouth and lips seem to swallow Xiao entirely. He dominates his mouth with ferocity. The pressure of his lips and tongue suck all the air from his lungs and his skull feels as though it will cave under Heine's crushing grip. Heine's teeth sink lightly into his lips and Xiao thoughts scatter in all directions. Heine's movements deepen into a desperate and brutal plunder that Xiao Yan cannot resist. He can only succumb completely.
Ah...He will die! He will certainly die!
The joke Liv told him in the aircraft, that first day, rings in his ear and horrified he reaches his hands out to frantically push Heine away.
His hands meet nothing but mist.
There is nothing there.
Nobody in front of him.
"What......"
Xiao Yan dazedly stumbles backwards, discovering that Heine has already exited the disinfection room.
Closing his eyes tightly, Xiao Yan rubbed his forehead.
Bad...and that kind of illusion...
Now that Heine has left, the entire area is eerily quiet. Xiao Yan slowly walked toward the exit and slides open the door. His mind is constantly running reels of Heine cutting down the zombies in the hall, struggling to slice them all down. That kind of desperation was clearly not him simply performing a duty.
It was Heine absolutely committed to saving him.
.
When he thinks of it, it all seems like an illusion. An illusion in which Xiao Yan is very important to such a powerful and indifferent man.
"Haaa." Xiao Yan sighed and left the room. He looked up, each step gaining a steadiness he did not posses before. Maybe it was because he knew he would never escape the desire to chase after the man behind that emotionless mask.
His only option was to become stronger.
The underground refuge at the base is very tense. Xiao Yan and several other trainees are completely useless here. Everyone has their own job and is anxiously busy. However, the students can only sit in a corner, quiet and silent.
Lily sat beside him, her head down, after a long quiet she finally whispered, "Is your face is okay?"
"It's fine, just a splash of zombie pus."
Lily was still acting uneasy. Xiao Yan watched her fidget. Her fingers twisted over each other, she clasped her hands and then wrung them together.
Xiao reached out and covered her nervous hands.
"Everything will be fine."
"Thank you......"
I don't need thanks, Xiao Yan thought, I've loved you secretly for a long time.
Xioa Yan had never confessed his feelings for Lily. She already had a boyfriend. He was Major Denzel, a young handsome military officer with a bright future ahead of him.
"Colonel Burton is quite scary." Lily looked down as she spoke.
Heine was sitting silently in the corner sharpening, cleaning and adjusting his weaponry.
His expression was focused and cold. Xiao Yan glanced at Lily.
"But he saved us." Xiao Yan pulled his lips into a smile attempting to comfort the rattled girl.
Lily shook her head with a strange certainty
"He didn't save us. He saved you."