Damian always had a way of getting under your skin, and you hated yourself for it. You'd dated for a year, sixteen to seventeen, broken up and become 'friends' afterwards, and now you had to sit there as he slowly became a mini Bruce Wayne. Maybe it was your fault. You were his first real relationship, and if you'd tried harder to make it meaningful and longlasting, he'd still be with you instead of making you watch him kiss with other girls.
Everyone knew he was an Adonis, and if he was your type, you'd want to make out with him. You couldn't complain. You'd dumped him. You couldn't be jealous. You didn't have a right to be jealous. And you claimed to be his friend. You ate lunch together, hung out on the weekend, shared a car when going to parties. You were friends. No matter how hard it got sometimes.
You thought about how easy it had been at the beginning. How quickly you'd connected with each other. Becoming friends through other friends until you were in one large social circle, eventually dating. You'd caught onto Damian's mask early on, you'd watched how he shifted personality when any press were around, ar any people from his high society balls. How he was harsh to people and expected everyone to be at his level. He grew as a person, he grew with you. He still had that personality because people rarely change completely, but he was trying. Eventually, he was seen as the boy who could live in your dreams, sown together and perfect. You seemed to be the only person who noticed how he was coming apart at the seems.
When he started dating again, you couldn't pretend anymore. It wasn't like you still liked him that way, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. You were one of many, you weren't special, you were just the first. He'd called you special many a time, but you weren't anymore, you didn't matter, you weren't on the pedestal. It was no one's fault. He was going to start dating again, eventually, and you just hadn't expected it to happen so quickly. You started hanging out with the mutual friends separately. You'd only broken up with him because he was hiding something and constantly busy without an explanation. You didn't need to see him eating some other girls face every lunch.
You ended up back in his life when he was supposed to give a speech to some parents on prize giving day. He was frozen by your locker, holding his speech in front of him and panicking. Damian Wayne didn't get panicked, which explained why he'd come to you. You had always seen him at his weakest, you'd never believed the mask to begin with.
Luckily for him, no one else was around so you could snap him out of it without blowing his disguise.
"Dami?" you snapped fingers in front of his face.
"I've had a bad week." He shook his head.
"You don't want to give a speech."
"I'm not in the mood to have people staring at me and judging me more than they already do."
"Wanna ditch?"
"I can't ditch, my dad's out there, and we're both getting prizes."
"How do you know I'm getting a prize?" you hadn't told him, and you didn't think of any reason for him to know.
"Doesn't matter, I can't go up there right now." You didn't make him tell you why, it wasn't your place anymore. He just needed someone to support him, a friend. That's what you said you were. That's what you'd be.
"Split it, you offered to do the speech, but I'm student council head, so it makes sense for me to do it too. Split the speech halfway, then not only will you not be up there alone, but they'll only be looking at you half the time." you took the speech and started to skim it.
"That's not fair to you."
"You think I'm scared of Gotham Academy parents? I know they're all pretty much snobs waiting for me to fail so they can complain about how their kids could have done it better. But I also know not all of them are, spot the ones that aren't."
So that's what you did. You worked together, smiled and laughed, entertained the crowd, and you made no mistakes. Damian and you always had a way of working, but working with Damian never came without strings attached.
"I didn't think you guys were still friends?" his latest girlfriend gave you a one over. She wasn't some cliche bitch from a movie. Damian wouldn't just date some random girl with no nice qualities. He liked substance and people with an opinion they could back up. The girl didn't bully you overdramatically in a lunch hall, but she wasn't fond of you either. You weren't friends with her, she didn't know you well, she didn't have a reason to like you. It's hard to fond of your boyfriends ex, especially when everyone still talks about how she was the best. It was hard enough for you to be fond of any of his girlfriends for a similar reason.
"We aren't friends." There was something about the sentence that stuck with you, he wasn't just making some agreeing comment, he was being clever. You didn't like it when he being clever. "I was told we had to do it together." Damian didn't thank you, he didn't give a second look, he just went back to being the playboy billionaires son, leaving you shaking your head and rolling your eyes. The second anyone looked at him for longer than a second, started to ask a question, he tapped out. You'd helped him out of his tricky situation, and it was his turn to leave now, he didn't need you anymore.
You slipped out of his life again, quickly and without any regrets. You couldn't help it if you were too nice to leave him that day. He could think he used you all he wanted, you knew better. You knew he wasn't happy, and you knew he was going to screw up one day and come out on the other side regretting everything - maybe you'd even become friends again. You didn't think he'd screw you in the process of realising he'd made a mistake trying to be his dad.
The next few times you reconnected were brief and almost univentful. They weren't easy, because he was often such a pretentious ass, but you didn't expect a connection with Damian Wayne to be some kind of picnic. There was the time you were paired together for a research project and you ended up laughing so much the librarian kicked you both out. Once the project was over you separated off. The time he dumped one of his girlfriends and they were trying to track him down to throw a fit so you hid him and calmed her down. He'd come screaming your name down the corridor and desperate for help from someone who'd get it and not just want to laugh at him. You'd gone to him when you needed help with fundraising for one of the school's events. You needed his opinion on some of the art pieces that would be used to decorate the walls. You'd gone to him because you knew he'd take it seriously, and because you knew he'd understand why you were working for it to be so perfect. You'd gone to him when your mother had been put in hospital after a bank robbery. Who knew why, you just ended up at Wayne Manor. And it was the best conversation you'd ever had with somebody. Each time life got a little hot and heavy, he'd freeze up and you'd snap him out of it. Neither of you acted any differently, but you couldn't help but think about the Damian you'd first met - that Damian never froze. You didn't mention that to him, that wasn't your place. You both just had to play your parts for what they were worth.
It all came to a head at his eighteenth birthday party. He'd invited everyone in the year to the event, and surprisingly enough, you'd decided to go. Loads of your friends were going to be there, it would be fun, and maybe you did want to see what he'd planned. Being his friend, or whatever you were, had never been easy, but you were still something to him, and you wanted to wish him Happy Birthday through something other than Snapchat.
You greeted your friends then went to find Damian, you'd quickly say hey, then disappear back to your group. It was only polite. The music was loud, and everyone was shoving into each other as they danced. You eventually found him standing and watching the crowd from a platformed section, and you pulled yourself up. He didn't seem to be enjoying his own party.
"Hi!" You yelled as loud as you could, and he turned his head mouthing something. It was so loud up there that he couldn't even hear you. You tried to speak again, but he just shook his head and rolled his eyes in a typical old Damian fashion, grabbing your hand and leading you to the back of the building, where all the cars were parked.
"We can talk now." You could still hear the music, and it was cold. Gotham was always cold. "Actually, still not right." He pulled some keys out of his pocket and unlocked his car, opening the door for you to get into the back. Him sliding in next to you.
"I just wanted to say hey, and happy birthday, we didn't need to leave the party." you shook your head.
"Are you sure that's all you want to say to me?"
"Oh yeah, we're alone again, that means we can act like friends!" You knew it sounded sarcastic and harsh, but it was true.
"We're not friends."
"I know that, you've said it quite a few times, yet I'm still the one clearing up your messes while you go and continue playing your part."
"I don't mean that we're not friends, so we're enemies or strangers. I'm not lying to anyone or pretending I'm better than you."
"Then why are we hiding in your car and not just talking in the front areas of the building?"
"Because, when I say we're not friends, I mean we're something else. Not more, not less, not friends. Just something else."
"That doesn't make any sense."
"Just have the argument you want to have with me. We've been pretending like nothing happened, but it isn't working so let's just have the argument." Something was off with him that night, and he was under your skin the way he always had been, encouraging you to be as temperamental as he was. If he wanted an argument, you'd give him one.
"You want to have the argument? It's not an argument, it's a wake-up call. You're off, stuck living in some Aesop fable, but let me remind you that none of it's real. This life you've created around yourself is fake, and that's why whenever something real happens, you come running to me! I'm your support system because you refuse to be genuine or real. You build your little mask and all your walls and you don't want me around because if I'm noticing it, you're scared someone else might too. But you refuse to admit that you need me so you act like I'm not there. You make me watch you make out with those other girls hoping eventually I'll believe you're actually happy doing that when I know for a fact there is nothing you hate more than being used - so why would you just use people like that. It's sick, you're becoming someone who you used to make fun of, and I don't know why, I don't care why, I'm just finally going to tell you to stop! This perfect lie you've built, it's making me sick, you act like your life's a picnic when it clearly isn't, but everyone else believes it so you carry on! You're taking the easy path instead of the Damian one, and one day you're going to wake up hating yourself so much because the last thing you ever wanted to do was become someone else."
"You actually think you have a clue what my life's like? We broke up because I didn't tell you what my life was like, remember? I was just busy, and crazy, and trying to please everyone, and you broke up with me. I didn't make you watch me kiss other girls, I didn't make you do anything. You chose too. You're right, I hate being used by people, and maybe I was using those girls to create a facade, but you were using me too. You knew something was going on with us, and you didn't act harsh or cold, you helped me if I needed you, but you didn't then help me completely. You'd leave me alone and go back to pretending we were friends when we weren't, which just encourages me."
"Your stressful life had nothing to do with me, I was just nice. You made the stupid decisions."
He didn't respond, he just leant forward to kiss you, and for some reason, you felt yourself kissing back. Angry making out turned into more, kissing down your neck while slowly taking your clothes off as quickly as possible
When his phone went off, you were both brought back to reality for a second.
"They're about to do cake and want to know where I am." he sighed, sitting up and starting to get dressed.
"Are we just going to continue our pattern of pretending we don't interact? Because I've been getting a bit sick of it."
"Let's just get inside for the cake." He smiled slightly and helped pull you out of the car once you were dressed. "And if you really want everyone to know we're back together, I'll just kiss you've once I blown out the candles."
"That might be a bit much." You kissed him one more time, no one else was around, and it was just you and Damian Wayne.
"I've missed this."
"Me kissing you?" You teased
"You kissing me, feeling like someone's looking at just me...being away from that god awful noise." Damian glared at the door separating you both from the party music.
"Change back, it's always an option." you rested your head on his shoulder.
"It's a desirable option that I've wanted to try out for awhile now, beloved."
You laughed and rolled your eyes at the over the top nickname, letting him guide you back into his masked life, knowing he wasn't going to be putting up with it anymore. Damian Wayne wasn't Bruce or any of his brothers, he was him. He was difficult, arrogant, argumentive, secretive, but you could read him like a book. He was pretty easy if anyone asked you.