There was a beeping noise that became increasingly louder as Trinity began to regain consciousness. When she realized that wasn't what she would normally hear in the comfort of her own room, she came to with a start.
Her head was pounding like it never had before. Her migraines had been intense for a few weeks, but this was a whole other pain that she had never experienced. Tears sprung to the corners of her eyes as she tried to hold them back.
Trinity tried to sit up, but found the that the pain worsened. She squinted at the pressure it was causing to her eyes. It felt like her eyeballs were being pushed out of her skull.
Instead of sitting up completely, Trinity opted for leaning back on her elbows instead. She let her eyes travel across the room that she was in. She instantly recognized the sterile room and knew that she was in the hospital.
As a child, Trinity constantly lived in and out of the hospital for her sickness. At five years old, she had been diagnosed with having leukemia. Three years later, at eight, she had gone into remission. She'd practically lived in hospitals for those three years and could never forget them.
Hospitals didn't scare her, not anymore at least. At one point in time, she had cried at the thought of going back to the hospital. She had been terrified of the long nights she would spend alone, with nothing but the comfort of her favorite teddy. During the nights she was at home, she would wake from nightmares of running down the lonely halls, never being able to escape.
Over time, Trinity realized something. Things happen. Life itself was a big maybe. Maybe the kids she became friends with in the cancer unit would be alive the next day, maybe they wouldn't. Maybe her heart would continue to pump, and maybe the leukemia would overtake her.
Maybe if she stopped being so scared of the hospital, she could maybe, just maybe focus on getting better and being happy. So that's what she did, and it seemed to work.
Ever since she had gotten better, her fear of the white room that surrounded her subsided. Even though it still caused an uncomfortable knot to form in her stomach.
Trinity's mind flashed back to her cheer practice. She remembered cheering, watching Kayla fall, her vision leaving her and then everything else was blank.
She didn't like that blank feeling. It was like an annoying itch that she couldn't scratch. It was just downright irritating.
She just assumed she had fallen because of the bandages she felt wrapped securely around her head. Her hand reached up to hesitantly touch the back of her head, and she cringed. This, of course, only brought her to feel more pain.
Yeah, definitely a head injury.
When Trinity's mom walked through her hospital room door, she was ecstatic for a brief millisecond before her heart clenched and dropped to her toes. Her mothers face was distraught, and stained with tears. Tears that were still streaming endlessly. Nessa couldn't bring herself to look her daughter in the eye. She refused to be the one to deliver the bad news.
Trinity choked on a sob that was trying its best to rip its way out of her throat. She knew that bad news was coming. "Mom... Mommy, please. Whats wrong? Is it.. Is it the cancer? Is it back?"
She couldn't hold it back anymore, and let out body racking cries. Nessa ran to her daughter immediately, and hugged her tight.
"No Trin, the cancer is still gone. There's something else though. It's really serious, and to be honest with you baby, it's worse than leukemia."
Trinity searched her mothers face and for a second only one thought flew across her mind.
'This can't be happening to me.'
Nessa patted the hair on Trinity's head affectionately, making sure to be cautious of the injury and bandages she was sporting. Nessa gazed at her daughter for a long second.
She had always been such a trooper. It hadn't been fair when the beautiful, young girl had been diagnosed with leukemia before she had the chance to even start in kinder. It hadn't been fair that she was forced to grow up before she had the chance to be a child. But, despite everything, Trinity had been strong. She persevered like no other, and her mind had been set on getting better.
Now, however, all Nessa could see in her strong girls face, was the shadow of a broken soul. It absolutely killed her. She gave Trinity's forehead a light kiss and began talking.
"So your leukemia, thats still gone, but what you have now is a different type of cancer. The symptoms should be showing by now, according to the doctor. Headaches, being moody, black outs? Have you experienced any of these already?"
Trinity nodded carefully, " Yeah, I've had headaches a lot recently. I just thought they were from my new contact prescriptions. And yesterday , the reason I fell was because I couldn't see and I panicked. "
Nessa's eyes geared up a bit, and she hugged her daughter closer. "Oh baby, you have something really serious. Your fall yesterday probably helped you more than you know, because we may have never discovered it. You have a brain tumor. When you fell, you should have had a mild concussion, but your brain started swelling. This made the doctors want to do some scans and they found a large mass in your sphenoid bone.
"He says it's called a chondrosarcoma. It's been growing for a while, but the symptoms have only just started to appear because it's getting worse. It's-"
Her mother went pale, and stopped talking.
Trinity's blood went cold. "Its what mom? Tell me."
Nessa took a deep breath and continued. "It's.. growing at a faster rate than it should be. It shouldn't be this bad yet, but it is. "
Trinity couldn't wrap the idea around a tumor growing in her head. She almost wished the leukemia had come back. That would be a thousand times better than this tumor.
She glanced at her mothers face and saw the lines between her eyes. She knew Nessa was holding something back.
"Mom, what aren't you telling me? They can take it out right mom? Please.... please tell me they can take it out!"
Trinity was sucking in shallow breaths, and her heart was pumping into overtime. A loud ringing started in her ears, and in the back of her mind she knew she was having a panic attack and needed to relax, but she just couldn't.
The look on her mothers face told her everything she needed to know. Tears were now pouring from her face. She put her face in her hands and let out a sad moan. "How long do I have?"
Her mom couldn't answer as she burst into tears, and Trinity heard a cough from the doorway. She glanced up to see her dad with his eyes bloodshot from crying. He shook his head slightly, " Its not long baby girl. The doctor said you might have until around graduation."
Trinity's heart monitor skipped, and she screamed. " THREE MONTHS! THAT'S IT? That's not enough time for anything..." her voice dropped at the end. "Why dad? Why is this happening?"
Her dads heart broke at the sight of his daughter. The girl who had fought cancer and beat it at a young age. The girl who made the varsity cheerleading team as a freshman, and stayed with it throughout her high school years. The girl whose dream was to attend Harvard. The school that she had just received an acceptance letter from.
He couldn't take it. He didn't want to accept it, the fact that his little girl had gone through so much, achieved so much and it would all be over in three short months. He put his head down as tears fell.
" I don't know Trinity, I really don't," he whispered as he sat next to his wife.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
After Trinity had a chance to calm down, the doctor came in to explain everything.
"Hello Ms. Velazquez. My name is Doctor Tanner. Now, I'm going to give you a brief explanations of the tumor growing in your head okay?
"It's called a chondrosarcoma. It's formed right here, " he touched the bottom of her head where it began to form into her neck, " at the base of the skull. The tumor grew from transformed cells that would usually produce cartilage. It's rare to receive something like this in your cranium, so your case is one we haven't seem often.
"You have a higher grade tumor. This means it is growing at a slightly faster rate than it should be, and there's a good chance that it will spread to other parts of your body. Now, to prevent that, we can give you radiation therapy. It will slow the growth, and the cancer from the tumor will stay in your brain alone. Apart from that, there isn't anything else we can do for you.
"I'm sorry. "
I'm sorry. Those words echoed through Trinity's mind for a second. How many times had a doctor said that to her, in the same detached way that she had become accustomed to. How many times had she thought that it was all over because of those two words. Before she would have a chance to beat the odds, and now?
Those two words repeated in here mind, giving her a sense of finality. This time she couldn't beat what was being thrown her way. This time there was no second chance for her.
This time she was going to die.
With that thought, Trinity turned to her parents wearing a false bravado on her face and sighed, " So whats the game plan guys?"
They glanced at each other before her dad spoke, " We're obviously pulling you out of cheerleading. " Trinity was saddened by that, but understood. "We can't risk anymore accidents like this one and there really isn't a point in being on the team if you're not going to be going to school anymore. We think it's a good idea if-"
Trinity cut him off, "What are you talking about? I'm staying in school. I've worked too hard to get where I'm right now, and I will not let this beat me. I'm going to stay in school, I'm going to be valedictorian and I'm going to graduate. I want to at least be able to say I finished school when I die. "
In that second, Trinity wasn't the girl dying, she was the determined one that she had been all her life. The look on her face told her parents that what she said, was final. While they were reluctant to agree, they did anyways. They knew she needed this if she was going to stay sane in her last few months.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Here ya go :)
Enjoy!
~Alyssa xx