"I wish I saw things clearly,
I guess I'm just not the sort."
-❄-
Click.
He dragged his feet suggestively towards her, pinning her to the edge of the table as he watched sweat trickle down her forehead and her throat. He flicked a finger, pointing it to her as he stared down at her impassive blue eyes, hoping that she would for once, cower in fear. But she didn’t as she balled her hands into fists, ready to strike him down with a well deserved punch. Her face was taut as her brows creased in anger, her nerves singing, her scalp prickling over one stupid lecture. He grabbed her wrists as he continued to glower down at her, his eyes a dark shade of venomous greens, his hot breath hitting her face. And instead of pushing him off of her, she spat at him as if it was the last thing she could ever do.
“I’m done with you.” Hans seethed in virago as he loosened his grip on her, wiping her saliva off of his face with the back of his hand. “I’m done with this bullshit.” He muttered as he turned on his heel, forcing the closed door open and sending the eavesdropper onto the floor.
He rolled his eyes at the both of them, refusing to help Anna to her feet. He then slammed the door close, heading towards his room to do what he should have done months ago before all of this became a hot ball of mess. He turned corners, avoiding their stares and shake of heads as he shoved everything out of his way, shattering vases and ruining the neatly lined up armors in the process. He dragged his sweaty hands to his face as he rubbed them as if to soothe even though it was futile. He knew better, he mused. He knew better then. But what force was strong enough to outwit the pernicious snake people like to call love? As far as he could tell, there was none as he tried so many times to push the bizarre feeling away, knowing that it would lead to nothing but several spiteful words and an accident neither of them seem to want. What kept him tied down was the promise she had spoken to him silently, when she thought that he was sunken along with the dreams that haunted him through the course of night. But he knew right then that it was deceitful, thus, lacked verisimilitude. And he had to admit – though it wounded him far deeper – that he believed in it in spite of the voices that told him that he was going the wrong way. Because for once, he thought that someone actually cared for him, because for once, he thought that he could be loved.
Oh Hans, if only there was someone out there who loved you.
How could he forget that love was as opaque as soiled water? How could he forget that after all he has been through, after all that woman has put him through? How could he forget the only thing she had imparted him? How could he? Was he that blinded that he forgot to see things clearly?
Oh Hans, you foolish, foolish boy. Why would I ever love a man who is thirteenth in line? I would never stoop to that level. You’re pretty, but never nimble.
And she was right. Who would ever dare stoop down to his level? He was a disgrace. And hadn’t her parting been lesson enough to tell him that he was never to love ever again? But yet, he stayed a dullard, thinking that maybe this time, things would be different, that Elsa would be different. But she was like her, except that she wasn’t a social climbing cocotte. But nevertheless, both of them broke his heart as if it wasn’t broken enough. Selfish, preeminent, formidable, and peremptory, these words seemed to fit every possible angle the Queen of Arendelle has. It was without doubt that she only cared about herself for she hadn’t graced the baby a well deserved thought.
He sniggered at the thought as he swung the door open, his mind set. No matter what the odds were, what fate has been decided for him by none other than the iniquitous queen, he would still defy them inasmuch as he was tired of having every injunction shoved down to the very end of his throat with no chance of regurgitating every damn ultimatum spoon fed to him. He couldn’t bear this any much longer.
It was do or die.
With one swift hand, he shoved every valuable he had brought from the cursed land of the Southern Isles in an old casket that once belonged to his father. He didn’t allow himself to shed the tears that were needed to be shed, forcing the thick knot in his throat back down to wherever the hell it came from. He refused to give her the satisfaction. At this point, Queen Elsa of Arendelle henceforth will no longer take control of him as he is his own man and whatever decision he was to make was for him and for him only. It was for his best to take the goddamn detour that had been waiting for him for months. If he hadn’t ignored it, he wouldn’t be in here in the first place. And if it wasn’t for Adrian and his brothers that pitied him because of the fate he shall face in their confounded kingdom, he wouldn’t have been spending all of his frugal seconds dealing with feelings he didn’t want.
“Hans?”
He shut the casket close as he turned to meet Anna’s impending gaze.
He sighed exasperatingly, placing his hand firmly on the casket’s handle. “What do you want now?” He tried his best to trodden the questions that were beginning to pester him as he lifted the case and placed it on a null dusty vanity.
She evaded, her eyes focused on the old rickety case. “You’re leaving.” She stated as she returned her gaze to his, worry clouding her once tenacious teal blue eyes.
“I am.” He said as he folded his arms against his chest, keeping eye contact as much as possible, putting up the goddamn façade once more.
Anna braced a hand on the threshold, unable to maintain her balance. “Just like that,” she muttered in disbelief.
“Just like that,” he agreed as he shifted all of his weight on his left leg.
You were so desperate for love that you were willing to marry me just like that.
All the color in her face disappeared as the bubbling anger grew too much, spewed too much, ruined too much. “What about the child?” She asked as she rocked her heels, trying to control it, concealing, not feeling.
“Elsa would marry another man. In a matter of months some prince from a neighboring kingdom would lay all the sweet, sweet words, the beautiful roses and tulips, and his pride at her feet. And because he is not a Prince Hans of the Southern Isles, she would agree to have him as her king, lover, and the father of our child. He’d be more deserving, than I ever will be.” He sighed in faux contempt as he sat on the bed, inept to maintain his stance.
The sorrow sank in way too deep.
She refused to believe that. “She loves you.” She mumbled as she hid a stray hair behind her ear.
“She doesn’t.” He shrugged casually as if it hadn’t meant anything to him – at all.
Anna raised a questioning brow. “How could you be so sure?” She asked as she placed her hand on her hip.
“Because I am,” he stated.
She rolled her eyes at him. “That doesn’t make any sense.”
“Neither does this whole situation.” He ran his hand through his hair as he closed his eyes. “Why are you pursuing this?” He asked hopelessly, opening his eyes to look at her just so that she could see how much of this was breaking him.
She sucked in her breath, prepared to say it albeit she knew he would mock her. “Because,” she paused. “Love is an open door.”
He laughed – no guffawed at her naivety. “I’m a villain, Anna.” He stated. “The bad guy doesn’t get the girl.” The laughter died in his eyes as it was replaced with the sorrow he had been carrying.
“But you’re not.”
He scoffed. “That’s stupid.” He muttered. “I almost killed the both of you.” He reminded her as he lied down on his back, his arm swung over his face.
“People change.” She said matter-of-factly. “Second chances happen.”
He placed his leg on his thigh as he sighed deeply, defeated. “That’s fairytale bullshit, Anna.”
She walked towards him – hesitantly. “It doesn’t have to be.”
He rolled out of the bed and stood up, placing both of his hands on her squared shoulders. “I’m leaving Arendelle.” He avoided eye contact as he let his hands drop to his sides.
She couldn’t believe his words. “What? You sent a letter to –”
“There’s no letter. They don’t know.” Another sigh escaped his lips.
“Then how?” She wished to know. She wished to stop him before it was too late.
He was losing his patience as he turned on his heel and began to pace. “I validate Elsa’s paper works. The Southern Isles will send its fourth ship for trade in two days. It doesn’t matter whether I get caught by my brothers or not, I just need to get the hell out of this goddamn place.” He ran his hands fiercely through his hair as sweat profusely trickled down his back.
She swallowed for she knew what was waiting for him back there. “That’s a suicide mission.” She whispered, placing her hand above her mouth, unable to process everything.
He sat down on the chair as he tapped his foot restlessly on the floor. “I want to die, Anna. I can’t live like this anymore.”
Elsa, please, I can’t live like this anymore.
She bit her lip. “Hans,” was the only thing she could muster, the words slowly sinking in.
Then leave.
Anna shot her head up. “I can’t let you do this. Elsa won’t like it, it will break her.” She pleaded as she clutched his arm helplessly.
“That’s why you’re not going to tell her.”
She shook her head. “I can’t do that.”
He bowed his head in defeat. “All my life I’ve been robbed of everything. You’re not going to rob me of my freedom now, aren’t you? Of all people, you know what it feels like to have nothing, to be always wrong, to be the least. Just please, just this once, do this for me.” Now it was his time to plead as tears slipped from his eyes, taking away his pride and dignity. He didn’t need them anyway.
“Fine,” defeated, she turned on her heel and hugged herself. She worried about her sister.
Hans sighed as he took the casket. “Thank you, Anna.” He whispered. “And when I leave, please tell her that I love her.”
--------------------------------------
Cliffhanger!
Yeah, so it took me sixteen days to update. I'm so so so sorry. I hadn't had any time.
Anyway, Hans is leaving Arendelle :(
I'm sorry it was short.
Thank you for the support tho. I didn't know this story would go so far! :D
With regards,
Your charming and beautiful [wink] Athena.