I slammed the door behind me, collapsing into my bed and burying my head in my pillow. I cried softly into it. I didn't understand. . . I'd been preparing for this moment since I'd gotten here, and I ruined everything for myself with the Avatar and the Fire Nation. They both would kill me now.
I continued crying into the pillow until someone knocked on my door, and I hoped it was Zuko. I stood up, wiping my face, my lip trembling. My hair was a mess. I'd thrown the crown against the wall. I kicked it aside as I threw the door open.
"Zuko, I—"
"Stop." It was Azula.
"I can explain," I tried, but she shook her head and pushed my shoulders back. I stumbled back as she swiftly walked into the room.
"You lied." She narrowed her eyes. I pursed my lips, putting my hands over my face. "You lied and then screwed up everything."
"It just happened—"
"Look, Mei, I lie a lot," Azula said.
I stared at her, the lump in my throat preventing me from taking.
"In fact, I lie so much I've lied to you most of all."
"Azula, where is this coming from—"
"I lied that there was no other information in your father's room the day I sent you that gift." Azula glanced at me and then paced across the room, her arms behind her back.
"What are you talking about?" I said shakily. You're joking, right?"
"No, not this time. Do you want to know who your mother is?" she asked, the smirk frozen on her pale face.
"Azula, what are you saying?" my eyes were stinging. My stomach hurt. My brain hurt. My heart, oh, my heart— "You know if my mother is alive?"
"No, I don't. But I know her little secret."
"What?"
"You're not her only child."
"What the hell, Azula?"
"There are two other children," she continued ignoring me. "But how about your father?" Azula said, brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
I was trying to take this information in. Was she lying? Did I have brothers out there somewhere? Sisters? A brother and a sister?
"He was a guard, but not just any guard," Azula continued almost carelessly. "He was my father's cousin."
It hit me as hard a brick in the nose, maybe even harder. "Are you crazy?" I asked hoarsely. "Tell me you're making this up. Please."
"You wish," Azula rolled her eyes.
"You're my . . . "
"Sort of like a second cousin. We're related!" She laughed coldly. She wanted to hurt me, to tear me apart for not being sure of my decision. "And your mother?"
"Azula," I whispered. " You can't. Don't do this to me, I'm begging you." I always wanted to know, but not like this. Not in a way it would hurt me.
"She called herself Kya in the Southern Water Tribe. Putting the pieces together?"
Kya. Where had I heard that before?
Katara. Kya's daughter. Sokka.
I was regretting standing up. I fell this time, my knees weak. my hands were pressed to the cold marble floor. I was shaking and the tears were starting, pat, pat, patting against the ground.
"And that imp of a boy is your brother."
"Sokka," I was sobbing into my wrists. "Why didn't you tell me this before?" I yelled at here, my vision blurred. "How cruel are you." I shook my head, spitting out the words, "You're so careless. You. Are. A. Monster. You're only happy when everyone is doing what you want. Zuko was right about you."
Azula's eyes widened at the mention of that word. "Don't you dare call me that."
"What?" I laughed humorlessly, "Does the truth hurt?"
"Ayame—"
"Get away from me!" I pushed her away from me. "I hate you. Zuko was right. No one can ever trust someone as selfish as you." I slammed the door behind me and took off.
I didn't know where I was running, but I knew what I had to do. I had to get away from here.
Suddenly, I slammed into something, falling backward onto the ground. I wiped my eyes and looked up to see Zuko looking down at me, his prince crown on his head and his hair pulled back away from his eyes.
"Zuko—"
"What's wrong?" he asked, looking breathless as if he'd run for a while.
"I—" before I could complete the sentence I was in hysterics, sobbing all over the place and covering my face with my hands. And then Zuko was there, pulling me up by the elbows and making me look straight into his golden eyes.
"What's wrong?"
"Azula," was the only word I could say, and all he replied was a small but to-the-point sentence. He'd warned me.
"I knew it."
🔥🔥🔥
"So basically," Zuko said when I was in his room and had blurted out the whole story, "You're related to Katara?"
"And Sokka." I sniffed.
"Who?"
"The guy with the boomerang."
"Oh."
"It's just . . . " And then I broke down again, leaving Zuko standing there, uncomfortable. "I can't . . . " I couldn't talk. "Overwhelming."
Zuko surprised me. He walked towards me and sat next to me, and then he hugged me.
I stopped crying. "What are you doing?"
He let go of me. "Trying to make you feel better."
"With a hug?"
"Isn't that what people do?" he asked.
I smiled through the tears. "Yeah. Yeah, they do, Zuko." And he put his arm around me again. I leaned into his shoulder. "You know, Zuko . . . "
"What?"
"You were right."
"When was I ever wrong?"
I giggled despite the situation. "That might be true." I wiped my eyes and sat up. "God, Katara's my sister."
"Yeah. You said that about a hundred times."
"What if you found out I was your sister?" I almost snapped. "How would you react?"
"God, no, that would be disturbing—" he stopped, his pale cheeks flushing. "I mean—"
"Why would it be disturbing?"
"No reason."
I raised my eyebrows. "You know, I'm thinking something right now that's really funny so I won't say it."
"What are you thinking?"
"Somebody's got a little teensy tinsy teeny wittle little crush."
"You're right. That is funny."
I smiled through the grief. "I love you, Zuko."
He stared at me. "What?"
"Don't even make me repeat it."
"Oh. I . . . you . . . " his face flushed. "You're not joking?"
"No. Isn't that what you were going to tell me at the beach?" I said slyly.
He stood up. "I have to go now." He tried to look away, but I held his arm.
"No, wait." I stood up too. "If you want to hear me say it again, I'll say it because I want to say I love you."
We both stood there, looking at each other. And then I repeated the phrase that scared me as much as it made me jumpy and excited.
"I'm Katara's sister."
"I know, God you already told me."
"I know I did."
"Can I leave?"
"You lo-ove me," I said tunelessly. "You should just say it now."
"I don't. I mean, I don't not . . . What I mean is I—"
"I know, I never give you a chance to say it." I sighed. "I thought I couldn't let you say it because it would ruin my life, but now I think I trust you enough."
"I . . . " he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know how."
"It's okay, Zuko," I said. "I'm literally alone now. Azula is nowhere near my friend and I can't get along with Mai, and Ty Lee is always busy. So I'm kind of stuck with you. And I know what you want to say so I wont force you to say it, because I'm stupid like that. And your—" I caught myself. "The fire lord probably wants me dead. So I'm stuck with you until I plan my escape. "
"How nice," he said with a smile. And before I knew it, he leaned forward and kissed me deeply. My stomach sank to my knees, and I could barely hold myself up.
"So Zuko, is it true?" a voice came from the doorway, interrupting both of us. I jumped ten feet back, hitting the table.
Zuko whipped around, facing Mai. "What?" all the blood seemed to drain from his face.
"Is it true?" she crossed her arms over her chest. "What she knows you're going to say but isn't going to force you to say it?"
"What . . . no." He said. "No."
"Zuko?" I said quietly. "I'm not sure I—"
"Don't." Mai put her hand up. "Just stop. You have a knack for ruining everything, don't you? Everything that's going well, you decide to ruin it."
I couldn't answer her. She was right.
"Don't talk to Ayame that way." Zuko said, facing her, his back towards me. I felt a pang of surprise and satisfaction.
"Stop, Zuko." She scowled. "I've been ignoring the both of you for a long time now. But now I want to hear it from you. Is it true, Zuko?"
I'm sorry, Mai. I wanted to hear him say it. I wanted to hear him myself with my own ears.
But instead, he said, "I don't know what you're talking about. " And without even giving me a second glance, he walked out of the room.
I was sure even Mai could hear my heart shatter into a million pieces.
I gripped the edge of the table and took a deep breath, looking up at Mai who's face was blurry through my tears. Her face softened, and her eyebrows were raised. She didn't look so evil anymore; she looked surprised, confused.
"Just leave me alone," I could barely croak out. She gave me one last look, turned around and walked away, the same way Zuko had gone. I kicked out fire and slammed the door, and then I fell to my knees. Before I could even react, the warning bells started to ring.