Chapter 20.
2 important announcements below, please read towards the end! 🎵🎵🎵
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recap: in the previous chapter, when Yì Rán was helping Madam to remove her hairdo, her veil was caught on the hairpiece of Madam and it came off. Madam saw her face and was surprised but managed to hide it. When Yì Rán was returning to her hit, Madam followed her and wanted to kill her but when she saw Pī Yáng with her, she began to suspect. She secretly went to find Ān Yú and revealed her identity as Xiǎo Rù, Crown Princess' servant, and that she now went by the name Rù Yáo. Rù Yáo found out from Ān Yù that Yì Rán was Princess Yì Róng.
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"You are not doing a great job taking care of Princess. I am going to take her back. She is a princess, she should not live like a servant." Rù Yáo hastily stood up, her eyes shooting deadly glares at Ān Yù. She still harboured immense amount of mistrust towards the Mistress. No matter what, she was the secondary wife of Crown Prince. According to the nature of the rotten palace and this ugly world, the primary and secondary wives were meant to be sworn enemies. How could she trust Yì Rán with her?
"No! You must not tell her who she really is!" Ān Yù hastily stood up, her right hand held onto the wall right beside her while her left clutched onto her chest as she breathed in deeply.
"She is a princess! She has the right to know who she really is!"
"She hates all of us!" Ān Yù screamed painfully, her heart shattered when she had to acknowledge the reality. Rù Yáo twitched an eyebrow and eyed the woman before her suspiciously.
"What do you mean?"
"His Highness Crown Prince, Crown Princess and even me...the...the Mistress...she dislikes all of us."
"What nonsense are you saying?"
"I..." Ān Yù sucked in more air deeply but her body rejected everything, causing her to let out an endless string of cough that began to hurt her chest. She covered her mouth and coughed, almost violently while Pī Yáng hastily poured a cup of water and rushed to her side, patting her back and handing the cup of water to her. When she removed her hand, she saw a familiar red patch of liquid staining her palm.
"You..." Rù Yáo was left speechless when she saw blood on the Mistress' hand.
"Yì Rán she...entered the palace two years ago, because...Empress Dowager Xīn noticed her resemblance to her younger self.. Yì Rán then grew fond of Empress Dowager because she was especially kind fo her. However, there seemed to be some rumours in the palace about how Crown Prince, Crown Princess and the Mistress were despicable...and...and she heard it. She believed it," Pī Yáng glared at Rù Yáo annoyingly while putting down the cup of water and retrieved a clean cloth beside the table and passed it over to Ān Yù.
She once said...her previous master passed away...? It must be...Empress Dowager Xīn then...
"Ho-how did she enter the palace?"
"First Prince saw her resemblance to the young Empress Dowager. He wanted to paint her as a birthday gift for the Empress Dowager, and the latter then took a liking to her and made her her servant," Pī Yáng continued.
"It is all your fault. It is all your fault! If you had not left the palace, Crown Prince would not have refused to attend the Court and all of us would never end up like today!"
A tear escaped Ān Yù's eyelid, it was a tear filled with regrets, melancholy and guilt. It was also a tear of longing for someone who would never return.
"Maybe it would have been better if I had never entered the palace in the first place," She said in a hushed voice, almost whispering but it was clear enough for the two to hear.
"Just why did you leave the palace?!" Upon hearing that question, Ān Yù turned to look at Pī Yáng and raised the cloth that was now stained with blood.
"This...is why I left the palace." Both the women eyed her in confusion, they still could not put the pieces together because there were still so many missing pieces. Those pieces that no one knew, those pieces that were buried under the red stain on the cloth.
"I made an agreement with Empress Hán...to leave the palace and leave Crown Prince forever or...to take poison little by little everyday."
"So you chose to leave the palace?"
I wish...I wish I had never left...the physical pain of the poison was nothing compared to the endless bleeding of my heart. How can I heal my heart?
"I...took the poison. I-I really did not want to leave, but I gave up. Crown Prince then sent me away. Maybe he knew, maybe he did not. That is why Pī Yáng, there is no need for you to search for anymore physicians from the palace. This illness of mine is an incurable side effect of the poison."
"...."
"Xiǎo Rù, no, I mean Madam Yú. Can I ask you one thing?" Ān Yù put aside the stained cloth and spoke in between her shallow breathing.
"W-What?"
"Why did Crown Princess send Yì Rán to me?" That was a question that broke even Rù Yáo's heart to answer.
"Crown Princess she...she had no one else to trust...the Wéi family and Hán family were in shatters after what had happened. Crown Princess worried that Empress Dowager would capture Princess and lock her up, or worse kill her. However no one knew you were alive, thus she decided to send Princess to you."
She was so desperate that she decided to send away her baby, her life treasure, to someone who was supposed to be her enemy and rival, the Mistress. She was just so cornered that it was heart-wrenching to watch her requesting her enemy for help.
The hut was thrown into silence. Perhaps it was too much for all of them to process the dark truths all at once. Each and every one of them stayed still in their own position and no one said anything, the air stilled and the coldness of winter could not even numb the pain the truths caused to their hearts.
"I should go. It has been to long," Rù Yáo patted her dresses straight and prepared to turn around and leave before Ān Yù added,
"Madam Yú, I do not have much time anymore. When I die, please protect Yì Rán."
Because it seemed like life was turning around and the palace was calling her back, to where she truly belonged.
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Rù Yáo sat in her own bedchamber on her bed, staring out of the window of her room, into the small garden of the manor. Her mind was filled with a thousand fearful thoughts, fear of Yì Rán's real identity being found out. She tightened her clench on the skirts of her dresses, desperately thinking about what she could do.
No doubt she had actually been hoping for an opportunity at avenging her master, Crown Princess. She wanted to dethrone Emperor Míng, the man who definitely did not deserve the throne he was sitting on today. However, she was just a woman, what could a mere woman do? She had no family backing and her husband, Minister Yú, was way too loyal to the Emperor. There was no way she could even get close to the Emperor, let alone having her revenge.
Should she focus her everything on avenging her master or should she just protect Yì Rán and never let her real identity be found out? After all, Crown Princess sacrificed her own life to save her. She did not want to let it all be wasted, be in vain.
However, what about the false rumours keep circulating around the palace? Crown Prince and Crown Princess had both suffered enough in their own different ways, why were they still being antagonised even after they died? The world was just too unfair and cruel, it was unforgiving and ruthless.
I do not have much time anymore. When I die, please protect Yì Rán.
What could she do? How should she protect the Princess? Maybe there was a way, no one would actually touch and harm a daughter of a highly-respected minister even though she was adopted right?
Just then, the doors to her chamber creaked open slowly and she saw the old man with greying beard stepped in. He was dressed down in his comfortable dark blue robes and he let out a smile.
"My Lord," Rù Yáo hastily came down from her bed and jumped towards the seats in the middle of the room, sitting at the side while Minister Yú sat at the middle.
"How have you been, Rù Yáo?"
"I have been great, My Lord. What brings you here today?"
"I just want to talk," he replied, taking the hot cup of tea Rù Yáo had poured him earlier. The heat from the cup of tea had warmed up his body that caught the numbing coldness of winter. His fingers wrapped around the cup firmly, ensuring that his hand was warmed up too and then he put the cup back down on the table.
"How is the restaurant's business? Is it still good?"
"Yes, My Lord. I have recently just hired a new chef whose splendid cooking brings in more new customers."
"That is good." Minister Yú smiled, his eyes only eyeing Rù Yáo for a short moment before he looked away. There was a short moment of silence seeping in between the short distance between them, before Minister Yú turned to look at her again.
"I know we are only husband and wife in name, but you know, you do not have to talk so formally with me. What I really want is a companion to talk with in my current old age, but it seems like you do not really like to talk."
Of course, how can I act friendly towards people who are loyal to Emperor Míng? I am a person of Crown Princess, meaning I am Crown Prince's person too. How do you expect me to not be cautious in front of you?
"I...have a request." Or perhaps she could put aside those feelings she had harboured and aim for a new goal. Minister Yú stared at his wife in amusement, it was the first time ever she had actually requested for something from him.
"This is your first time asking for something from me. What? Just say it. If it is something within my capability, I will grant it."
"I...want to adopt a child."
"Adopt a child?"
"Yes. I want to know how does being a mother feels like."
Her words stung his heart with a thousand needles, he felt guilty for depriving a woman her opportunity to be a mother. It was him who did not want a child to be born between them. However, he never thought of her feelings at all. She must have been lonely, living in such a huge manor with no one else but the servants to talk to when he was busy or away on duty.
"It is my fault that you do not have a child," Minister Yú said regretfully, before continuing, "Alright. Do you already have a child you want to adopt in mind?"
"I...want to adopt one of the servants in our manor." Rù Yáo carefully chose her words.
"What?"
"This servant is orphaned since young. Since we get along well, I decided that it is better if I just adopt someone I am familiar with, even though she is not young anymore."
"Who is it?"
"Yì Rán, my new side servant."
"Oh, the veiled girl?"
"Yes."
"Why not a son? Why did you choose a girl?"
"I...do not wish for my child to fight for inheritance with Young Master." Minister Yú smiled, satisfied when he heard her reasoning. He told himself repeatedly that he did not choose the wrong woman to be his companion in the old age after all.
"Have you told her family?"
"I have met her adoptive aunt and sister. They are friendly although I have not voiced my opinion yet, but I am sure they will agree to it."
"...Alright."
You think that I really want a child, you are mistaken. I just want Princess to be protected under the name of Yú family, it was just the first step. Good that you are easily sympathetic, I did not choose the wrong person after all.
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Omg chapter 20!!! Wow This story finally reached chapter 20 OMG. SO FAST!!! IM SO HAPPY AT HOW FAST IM WRITING!
Btw I've just created a new series on Tapas.io called Lifetimes Apart. It's about two lovers who were separated in the past, reincarnated and met again. Lightly based off real historical events and people (they are Xiang Yu and Yu Ji, if you know). Please do check ut out! My profile there is called Claire. This is the summary:
So I'm actually thinking of changing the cover for this story. What do you think? The previous cover had dull colours, current one is too...err...plain?
I just really like Liu Yifei's face ok, she has this face that I think is made JUST for historical dramas. Ok basically I just like Liu Yifei.
Okay see you in the next chapter and the special chapter! :)