ROSÉ.
A loud crowd of three thousand triggered my anxiety the moment when it was our turn to dance on stage, Fuck anxiety. I can do this, my future girlfriend's watching. I silently mumbled hoping that thought would encourage my trembling body.
We slowly walked into the open green field and positioned ourselves at the center right away. The crowd were screeching and screaming for our team, many Sydney uni students came in to support and it was overwhelming to see how they put up this big banner with our name on that occupied three rows of chair. I've never been hyped by all these people.
For a moment, I tried eyeing Jennie in the crowd and successfully made eye contact with my girl crush. Damn, I think I just saw her wink at me. That thought brought my energy and determination back up, as I positioned myself at the middle. When BBHMM by Rihanna started to play, we gladly executed.
...
My body felt light as a feather, as I flexed every dance move. I was in complete happiness, it was strange because everything was simple. I was extremely in glee with every step that I took and devoured the music as my feet move to its every beat. There was no burden nor worry, my feet and hands took over as if my body had encoded all the moves to execute already. I was in tranquility, my mind and heart was clear. This feeling. It's been long since I've felt this free and loose.
Ever since Jennie came, honestly, I thought my life was sucked by a whirlpool, it was fast and blissful yet dangerous and fleeting at the same time. I loved it because I had the chance to love her, regardless. Let's admit it, Jennie is one hell of work, I mended my heart to give it to her only to be broken once again, yet here I am still, waiting for her because I know, she will be the only thing that will heal me inside.
Why? Because she's Jennie Kim. She is in every beat of my heart, in every string of my guitar, in every song that I play, in every places that I go, and in every world that is left unknown. She is love in every form.
Heaven knows how much hell I will go through just to let her stay in my world. And thank god, she f'cking stayed. She fought for me, at last. No wonder I feel so joyful and sentimental now that the love of my life finally wants me too. Although we don't have any label yet, which is sad, but all I could do is wait.
These thoughts about her were all that I needed to finish my last dance move with confidence, without regrets and worry. I placed myself with just the right distance as I ran to increase my pace. I executed an aerial cartwheel in the center and made a split for the ending pose. Right at that moment, all the burden rolled away, as everyone in the crowd cheered for us, I was ecstatic myself.
...
We went backstage, Jisoo and Jennie were already there as they greeted us with proud smiles. Of course, Lisa quickly stole a long kiss from her tiny girlfriend as she lifts her up again. I know Jisoo's so proud of her one and only. Jennie, on the other hand, giddily approached and I couldn't help but smile at her gummy face, "Baby, you did great!" I was surprised on how vocal she was, considering that there's like a hundred people here backstage. I quickly embraced her tight, as a response to her greeting. "Thank god that was over!" I sighed deeply, as I found relief in her arms. "Here." She suddenly let go of our embrace and grabbed something under the inner pocket of her black cashmere coat, I gasped too loud. She handed me a rose.
"What the f- you really bought me a rose?" I asked out of disbelief. All these sudden heart attacks she's giving is too much to intake. I'm falling hard, again. "Yes. Why? Did I go too far?" She carried out a worry expression, but I shook my head simultaneously as I covered my mouth with my hands. I knew I was about to cry. Help. "Oh fuck. Don't cry." she placed her hands on my shoulders while fondling it for comfort. "I'm sorry I cry easily." I excused, as I try to stop my tears and sobs. "Don't get me wrong, I really love the rose. It's just that I'm such an emotional person." I added out as I fanned my face while tilting my eyes up. "Can you even get any cuter?" She giggled as she continued comforting me. I accepted the rose, and I never felt my heart go warm and light. I hugged her once again, "Thank you." I said in a genuine tone. "Anything for you, babe." She quickly replied, my heart was galloping inside. Jennie is making me feel things again. I screamed internally.
"Uhm, Rosé. They'll be announcing the winner soon, we need to go back." Lisa got my attention and I nodded right away.
"I think I should go." Jennie prompted and I agreed while wiping my tears. She was about to step ahead but she suddenly refrained, "By the way..." she quickly took off her cashmere coat and securely put it on me, "Next time, tell your team stylist to stop making you wear skinny crop tops like these. Like come on! It doesn't leave much to the imagination." I felt my insides completely disfunctioned as my blood rushed through my cheeks giving it a color of crimson red. Girl crush Jennie is acting up, my knees are trembling.
"I didn't knew you were this conservative." I managed to tease, "I know when's okay and when's too much. Like you should only wear these kind of outfits when we're alone together." She continued ranting. I never knew she have this possessive side, this is so not her. I fixated the coat she gave me and covered my crop top and short skirt entirely, "Is this okay?" I asked, she put out a smirk and winked at me, "Better. Now stay like that when the show's over." she took steps backward and slowly exited the backstage, I smiled like a dork by myself as I imagine Jennie.
...
Moments later, every team were placed on the field as the host was ready to announce the winners. I was beside Lisa and Seulgi, we were all equally anxious. Yet Lisa suddenly scanned my coat and shot a strange look at me, "Why are you wearing that ugly thing? Take that off, show your curves." She commented. "Hey, it's cashmere! Your sister gave this to me. She said the outfit was too revealing." I explained. She huffed out of amusement, "I gotta tell you, she's putting too much effort in keeping you for herself, alright."
"Isn't that a good thing though?" I asked, "Yeah, if that could stop me from hitting on you." Her slyness knocked me offguard. "Shut up, Lisa." I slapped her in the arms, "You have a girlfriend." I reminded her. "I know. I'm just fooling around. I don't want that little girlfriend of mine to bury me alive." She quickly laughed it off. Lisa has been this goof of a friend, and sometimes I wonder how she stays lively and optimistic all the time. It's really admirable.
"Now... For the second place." The announcer's voice quickly resurfaced in my hearing as my heart started to pump fastout of nervousness, "No other than, Melbourne University!" I gasped out of disbelief, there were two teams left, us and the Queensland University. "And now, I would be announcing the overall champion for this year's dance competition." Automatically, our team held hands, and each mumbled a silent prayer.
"The new National University Dance Squad Champion of 2018 is no other than...!" I closed my eyes as the tingling anxiousnesss travels down my spine, I held my breath as I hear my fast heartbeat aloud.
"SYDNEY UNIVERSITY!" I f'cking flipped when I heard our name. I screeched as loud as I can letting out all the happiness that I was feeling. Everyone was everywhere in the place. We jumped around with gleeful faces and joyful hearts, others cried which also made me tear up too. It was an overwhelming sensation. The confetti started to rain all over the field with dominant colors of blue and yellow, I heard the Sydney uni students screamed with us. It was a moment of victory and honor for our school and for ourselves. I've never been so proud.
JENNIE.
I literally screamed out of my lungs as the announcer called the name of our university. Jisoo and I quickly ran down the stadium and went to the direction of the open field where a crowd of students started to swarm the dance squad. All I could think about was finding Rosé and tell her that I am so proud of her.
I first saw Lisa as I hugged her tight, "I'm so proud of you, dork!" I teased. "I love you too dummy!" She squeezed me tight which got me irritated since I couldn't breathe properly. "You call your president a dummy? Tsk." I managed to utter in a squished tone. She let go of the hug before saying, "You're my sister first before anything else. So yeah, I can call you dummy." I rolled my eyes. "Go tell that to my GPA" I retorted back, she just chuckled.
"Uhm, can I have my turn now?" Jisoo on the side quickly tapped in the back with her eyebrows twitching. I somehow forgot Lisa is now a preoccupied lady. "Oh sorry." I giggled and stepped back and my bestfriend quickly gave my sister a kiss while muttering congratulations. I usually throw up seeing them in these kind of situations, but I'm gonna let them slide this time.
...
After a moment, my eyes traveled through the crowd, searching for Rosé. I've been imagining this scenario in my head for too long that I can't afford to make this a failure. I need to see her now. My navigation didn't fail me as I saw her in my black cashmere coat standing on her back, I giddily ran into her, when I was in a fair distance I carefully slid my hands through her waist and slowly enclosed my body on her back, she was a bit startled but managed when she knew that I was the one touching her. "Congrats." I uttered slowly.
"Oh, Jennie. It's you." She then turned around to face me but my arms were still wrapped around her waist. "I told you it's a good thing to be covered up." I said pinpointing the coat she's been wearing. "Well, your cashmere feels nice. I wouldn't mind wearing this." She complimented. I smiled back. "So I told you that I had something to say right?" The words freely went out of my mouth, as my heart started to beat frantically. She just nodded in response, "So i was wondering if I could take you on a date tonight?" I finally asked. "That's it?" Rosé suddenly raised an eyebrow. "That's what?" I was confused myself. Did she expected something different?
"Like that was all you have to say?" she asked further. "Uh-yeah." I said in a final tone. "I thought you were gon- nevermind." Her voice faded as if it what she would say would be too amusing. "You thought of what?" I tried provoking her again, but she just shook her head, not wanting to tell me anything further.
"Anyways, let's go on a date. Let me just grab my stuff and let's head out." She agreed right away, "I'll wait for you in the parking lot. " I smacked a kiss on her cheeks before saying goodbye. I quickly ran into the parking lot, but before starting my porsche, I facetimed Samuel first. "Hey, everything good out there?" I asked with both of my eyebrows raising in worry, "Yeah, uh, I don't know..." His head suddenly disappeared on the screen as I heard shackles all over the place. "Wait, what do you mean you don't know?!" My insides started to panic. Rosé obviously expected that I was going to ask her something really important but I intentionally deadpanned her, just not to spoil this surprise that I'll be having. Yet here is Samuel who is close to f'cking my whole plan up. "How do you work these new gas range? My f'cking stew is not cooking! Damn, why did my boss bought these complex ones! I can't wrap my head around these!" I heard Samuel mumbled in frustration, I realized that he was still cooking the kimchi stew that I requested him to do. "You had one job, Samuel. One job!" I rolled my eyes in disappointment. Like who doesn't know how to operate an automatic gas range?!
"F'ck it. I'm ordering kimchi stew. Everything's already set here, Jen. Well, if you won't include the stew you wanted me to cook." He said in assurance, a bit of relief transgressed inside me but the nervousness was still dominant. "Okay then. We'll be there in 30 minutes. Bye." I waved at him before hanging up, and timingly Rosé went inside the car, "So, where are we crashing?" she asked while looking at me, "It's a surprise." I winked at her as I drove out and went to the direction of seasonal cafe right away.
...
It all comes down to this moment. Where the love of my life is right beside me clueless of what's to become of us after I do this big step. "Close your eyes, babe." I prompted her as I wrapped her eyes with a blindfold and guided her inside seasonal cafe. It was still the place that held most special to me, because my plot twist happened here. She happened to me, here. Now with the help of Samuel, I've decorated the place with the things that remind me of Rosé.
There was one round table with two comfy chairs placed at the center. There was a vase of three roses and a candlelight that brimmed the ethereal feel to the dining table, of course, Samuel's ordered kimchi stew was there, with some good old classic steak. Up in the ceiling were flickering stars, I used an fiber optic panel star equipment to accomplish the illusion and in one wall was a silhouette of the Eiffel tower in Paris, just to plenish that French vibe in the atmosphere. I also rented a jukebox and inserted all Rosé's favorite songs in it, including Paris in the Rain of course.
"Where are we?" Her hands were adorably reaching out all over the place even though I was guiding her from behind, "You can sit now." I slowly said as I let her take her seat in the table. I settled myself on the other chair before telling her to open her blindfold. "Woah!" Rosé's eyes popped out of amazement as her head spun all around the area, I was satisfied with her reaction. "You prepared all these?" she asked while her jaw was still hanging. I nodded in reply.
"I felt kind of bad whenever you go treat me out on a date with your best effort and I never got the chance to pay you back. So I came up with this." I explained with a smile, "Aww, babe. You didn't have to." her flushed reaction made my heart flutter knowing that I made her feel like that. Ten points for Gryffindor.
...
We started the oblivious night with dinner. As usual, Rosé started digging into the steak and the stew.
"Remember the first time I met you in this café?" I started feeling sentimental as I held her hand across the table. "Yeah, I remembered sweating so much after you took a seat beside me." She giggled on the memory, "Really? All I remember was how skinny and white you were, I was totally envious." I said, "I wanted to know you somehow, I was curious." I added with my eyes boring into hers. Her eyes never fail to take my breathe away.
Our eye contact was interrupted when the piano version of Paris in the Rain started playing in the jukebox, our ears automatically tingled, I painted a smirk in my face, "Dance with me." I softly uttered an invite as I offered a hand, "I thought you wouldn't ask." She gladly took mine and we went to an open space of the café. I slowly slid my arms across her waist as her hands enveloped my neck, we were dancing cheek to cheek.
My heart was in great solitude with hers, it was warm and fuzzy. I was home. She was home.
"I wish we could stay like this." Rosé softly said while our feet danced to the slow beat, "Stay like what?" I asked as I added a little more pressure to our cheeks which made her pull closer to my body. Sh't her back feels so sexy, it's turning me on. My wild thoughts started luring inside me.
"Free and happy. Together." She responded, "We could do that you know." I stopped and faced Rosé, our eyes met but what I said made her expression more confused as both of her eyebrows raised, I sighed deeply. "Rosé..."
I placed my forehead against hers as I cupped her face with my hand while I fondled her soft skin. I started expressing my feelings in Korean, because I've practiced this so long. "You've been the greatest person to me, but I've never given my best to you. I want all of you, baby. So let me start over, let's do this again..." I gulped hard before saying the words that has been a difficulty to utter, "...and be my girlfriend this time."
I just saw her eyes flicker with luminosity, and her hot breath started to bother me in the inside. I couldn't stop staring at her wet crimson lips. "I f'cking love you. I really do." I muttered underneath my breath. I saw a smile creeping out Rosé's face, "I f'cking love you too, baby." My heart swelled so much at that moment. I have an angel like Rosé as my girlfriend now.
Without any words to say , I knew we thought of the same thing. As I leaned closer to reach her lips her hands traveled up the back of my nape, an electrifying sensation started to wash my sanity away.
Her lips tasted phenomenal, as always. We slowly devoured each others flavor. Suddenly, I felt a tear traveling down on our collided lips, she was crying. We detached our lips and I pulled her closer with medium force and embraced her. "You're mine now okay?" I said with assurance, she nodded excessively while crying. "I just can't believe that afterall the sh't we've been through, we can still be together." She tried muttering it in a modulated voice but her gooey tone from crying was still obvious.
"I'm sorry I took so long." I always find this need to apologize to her, after all I've done, she deserves better. She deserves all of me. "It's okay, at least you're finally here." Her words were still kind and gentle, I hugged her tighter as I felt her warmness radiate through my soul.
At last, We're finally official.
....
a/n: last ep would be tomorrow