The door closed behind her with a faint click. Her limbs felt heavy with all the running she'd done few hours back. The silence of the room welcomed her with opened arms. This was the first time in last two days she didn't have a constant fear of being robbed off herself. Her mind which was on a constant marathon was all blank now. The haze getting away slowly. The cuts on her feet were covered with bandage but they hurt. They were hurting for long but she realized it only now.
She slumped to the wall nearby leaning her head against it. The numbness was finally fading away and right here this moment she realized what loneliness was. Her heart felt heavy thinking about how her life turned upside down in the span of just 48 hours. That's what it took.
The smiling faces of the family she once had swirled before her eyes. Izma. Maheen.
Asim.
The smiling memory of his was slowly getting marred by a dark shadow. The shadow which was always there but she was too fool to not see it. How could he convince himself to do something as cruel as this. How?
She knew her sister would've figured something out by now. But was she strong enough to fight for her? Will she ever see her again? Or this life was again going to be hard on her?
Her eyes roamed everywhere inside the room she was currently in. So different from that dungeon she was put into at Regina's place. Her heart beat went erratic thinking about those hardest hours of her life. Where she'd prayed for death countless times. Where she was ready to be knocked down to a never ending oblivion and never open her eyes again.
Those sinister grins, hunger in eyes, lust dripping off the faces all came crashing back into her mind and she suddenly got up. Her hands gripped the ornaments adorning her wrists and in one swift motion the pearls went all scattered on the floor. She stumbled to the bathroom and switched on the lights with a trembling hand.
The girl who stared at her was someone she had never met before. Her hollow eyes were enough to scare her own self. The dried tears streaks were now a constant make up she wore. She touched her chapped lips and the few hard cracks made her wince. Not with pain. But with the realization how Regina had praised these features stating with such a body and a face as innocent she'll be a hit among her costumers soon.
Suddenly a mad rage took over. She started rubbing her face with the back of her palm. Her nails touched the delicate skin of her neck and left a mark.
She wanted to turn this beautiful face into something so gruesome that no one will ever even look in her way. Her mind was haywire. All the calmness she'd shown in front of that stranger going away into the thick air. This beauty. This innocence. It was a curse. This gullibility was what lead her here. And she hated herself.
Had she been a bit more sensible would all this happen? Her rash movements stopped, feeling she couldn't do much to harm herself anyway. A sob left her lips and then she felt herself shaking. She won't cry. And she didn't.
It felt like hours. She'd lost count of time. She only got up when her legs felt numb due to the cold marble floor beneath her. Yanking her form out of the bathroom her eyes fell on the an old worn out long sleeved shirt with trousers and a shawl. She immediately went towards the couch where the household had put it.
The fabric felt strangely comfortable against her skin. Not waiting anymore time she again went into the bathroom and almost ripped the white-crimson dress off her. It pooled in her legs leaving her bare but she felt as if she'd thrown dirt off herself. She pushed it away with her leg looking at it as if it would eat her here itself.
Turning on the shower she stood still under it. The warm water did nothing to sooth her aching body. And she wasn't even hoping for it to do so. She just wanted for the imprints of what she'd been through to wash away. Everything to go down the drain. She wanted to be clean.
But she didn't feel it. Heaving a sigh she pulled the oversize clothes on her body and stepped out of the bathroom with the shawl in her hand. Her gaze turned to her waist length hair. Never in her life she'd left her house without covering them under her scarf. But for last two days she hadn't even seen anything close to a head scarf. Without bothering to untangle the knots she pulled them in a bun and swiftly covered her head with the shawl.
She almost looked like her own self.
Almost.
Sans the emotional trauma she'd faced. The real faces that were disclosed on her and the way her whole life was crushed under a rock.
Her heart felt numb. Her mind felt blank. Slumping back against the wall she just kept on staring at nothing in particular.
____
Next Morning
Rohail looked up from his laptop screen at the arrival of his mother and sister. His lips curled in a smile but he didn't get it back from either of them which was unusual.
"You guys are back early."
He said eyeing them with an raised eye brow.
"Yeah. This brat won't let me stay in peace."
Saliha said smiling which didn't reach her eyes. Rohail turned to Abeer who was sitting there with a scowl set on her face. Shaking his head he again looked at his mother.
"How was everyone there?"
"They all are good. I'm a bit tired so I just go to my room. See you both at Lunch."
She patted his cheek and left from there. Rohail frowned at his always smiling mother who was acting weird today. Abeer stood in front of him about to go to her own room when he caught her hand.
"Kiddo! You can't go just like that. What's the problem. Everything is fine there?"
"Ya! Everything is good there at Nana's place. But not With mom and dad."
"What?"
She slumped down on the sofa while he took the seat next to her.
"You need to see this."
She opened her phone and pushed it in his hand. He frowned and read the article.
"Oh ..."
"Oh? This is all what you have to say? Do you have any idea how tensed Mom is? Dad is still in his office. Media is making fun of us all. They are discussing our personal lives and family matters! And you are saying just Oh?"
Rohail took a deep breath and hugged her sideways.
"Kido! Relax! All this is not new. And why are you so concerned about Media? They just need an inkling of what is happening is one's life And they'll make a whole story out of it."
"But Bhai! It's...It's high time he stop pulling all these stunts in front of people! Can't he see he is hurting all of us? Okay he doesn't like Mom, He doesn't like you...Me.."
Her voice trembled and a tear rolled down her cheek.
"But what about Dad? He is in so much pain due to this hate saga of his! He is unnecessarily stretching all this. Why he is so full of hatred? Why?"
Rohail wiped her tears and made her look at him.
"Abi! Relax! Look! Look at me."
She raised her eyes and looked on grumpily.
"He has faced some dreadful situations here in this house that we both have never. Dado had always hated him. Her cutting tongue, her taunts and her never ending accusations. He faced it all still not breaking. Believe me if I were at his place I would have broken down. You were just a baby by then so you don't know. He didn't have anyone of his own. Dad was busy with business and Mom...Well we know he never shared a nice equation with her for which I don't blame him. Giving your mother's place to anyone is not easy and specially when all your relatives and people around are bend upon making you realize she isn't your real mother. He never saw Mom's good nature towards him. The hatred in him is not his fault Abi. It were circumstances and some mistakes of our elders that made him what he is today. After all that time he was just a school going boy."
Abeer kept on looking at her brother. No matter what happened Rohail never blamed Rayyan for anything.
"And I know why you are angry with him. Why you are showing your frustration. Because you want him to acknowledge our presence in his life right?"
She nodded slowly.
"He will. One day he will regard us as his own. Hatred can never last for long. At last its just loves that prevails. Don't lose hope. It will take some time but he'll come around."
"But Bhai ..."
She wanted to protest at this. How long they would have to wait for him to let go of his hatred? He had to understand he was hurting them all. Specially Dad.
"Enough for today. Now go back to your room. I'll go and check on mom. Okay?"
He got up indicating the conversation was over but she wasn't convinced. With a sigh she nodded and left from there.
_____
"Mom?
Rohail knocked at the door receiving a faint reply from his mother. He entered inside and saw her zipping her purse.
"Mom you are going somewhere?"
"Yup! I need to take up the strict mom role no matter if he likes it or not and knock some sense into him."
"Mom Please."
Rohail protested meekly. He hadn't like the idea as he knew the face off between the two would make things worse.
"What please? Your dad talked to me yesterday and I can't tell how torn he was sounding! Rayyan is not doing any good. At least he should think about Hammad! The man hasn't left his office. He must be there. Blaming himself for everything all over again."
" I understand but meeting him that too in his office? No please! He won't be pleased and we can't present a show to people. Its our family matter after all. We will solve it like families do. If our reputation is precious so is his. Please Ma don't take a decision in haste."
Saliha nodded slowly and rested her head on his chest.
"I'm afraid Rohail. All this is proving no good to anyone. Rayyan has surrounded himself with so much hatred that some day It will burn him. And all this is just because of me!"
"Oh stop it Mom! Don't blame yourself for anything. You never wished any bad for him. He isn't able to see beyond his own beliefs! Please don't be upset like this."
She nodded slowly. Rohail took a deep breath and sent a silent prayer to Almighty to bring his family together soon.
_______
Whole night passed in a state of both sleep and wakefulness. Whenever she closed her eyes she would open them with a start as if someone will again come back to take her with him. But as soon as morning started making an appearance from the horizon she slipped into a deep slumber.
Now it was after noon and she had just woken up. Her mind was a jumbled mess. Whole night was spent in moping over what had been done. But now after finally getting her senses and calm back she was pondering over the fact that why the owner of this house had helped her. What would he get out of this situation? She had no clue. But he did seem quite thoughtful. As if he found a lead to finish his long pending work.
May be he had something to do with Regina.
If so then it was good. This deal was even and it meant that her offenders were not going to be peacefully living their sorry lives for long. She had a role to play here but was she ready to play it?
Sabahat had asked her for breakfast but she declined. She had lost her appetite. The signs of a lively soul inside her were slowly fading away. She knew for sure even if she went back to her normal life nothing will be same anymore. She wouldn't be same no more.
She needed peace of mind which was no where close. She wanted nothing but to cry her heart out. But not in front of anyone. She knew there was only one door she could knock at now. Leaving the room she walked outside in the silent hallway. Sabahat wasn't in sight so she couldn't ask her. Her eyes were darting everywhere. In search of what she also had no clue.
She didn't even want to think about her savior from last night. He didn't give her good vibes but he was the first person who was clear to her about what he intended to do. He didn't beat about the bush. She didn't know if it was a good or a bad thing.
She was about to turn to the side when her eyes fell on the small bar at the side of living room. Her face scrunched and then she just shook her head. Hoping for a prayer mat in this house was useless.
Heaving a deep sigh she turned back to the room and rummaged through the closet to get any clean piece of clothing. Finding one she spread it on the floor and just sat down there.
It seemed like all the prayers had been lost. She couldn't form one word. Her head hung low. Her heart devoid of anything. Was she being punished of something she did unconsciously? Was Allah not happy with her?
She stood up abruptly from their. Her heart thudding in her chest. She looked around frantically and almost ran outside the room. Her feet took her to a direction she had no clue about. She stopped in an unknown corner of the house when she felt the faint sound of her favorite call.
أَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلٰهَ إِلَّا ٱلله
Her feet took her towards the main entrance of the house. The guards at gate didn't stop her. And she didn't care. She just kept on following the call. Few turns of the concrete lane and she stood in front of the mosque. She entered inside where in a huge open space prayer mats where spread with people filling in. She found an adjacent room and quickly slipped in. As soon as she hit the door her head touched the soft material and the tears which were bottled within came streaming down her face. She cried for everything lost. Every tear felt like a piece of her was telling a story of its own to Allah. Asking for forgiveness. Telling Him about all the wrongs she had faced. She knew He was all knowing. But she had to share it with Him.
She didn't stop. It felt like a damn had broken down. When she finally got up and offered the prayer her heart felt it had a bit got its peace back. The burden felt lifted off her. She finished the prayer and raised her hands to ask for just one thing.
Peace. In her mind. In her life.
She was lost in her thoughts when someone cleared his throat. She looked around and found the Imam Sahab looking at her with a kind smile on his face.
"I'm sorry Imam Sahab. I didn't mean to sneak in..."
"It's okay. It's not my home. It's Allah's. Whom am I to complain."
She got up looking around nervously.
"You look distraught? Anything wrong?"
A sad smile appeared on her lips.
"Everything."
She sat down again when she felt him taking a seat in the far corner of the small room.
"There can't be everything wrong in life. There's always something bright in everything dark."
"That's what I used to think."
"Then what changed now?"
"My thinking."
"Then what about your belief? Is it also changed?"
She didn't say anything for sometime.
"I was robbed of those things and people I hold so dear to myself. I came to know the truth of this world in few hours. My whole twenty three years of life couldn't teach me what these few hours did. I feel....I feel blank from within. Like there's nothing good left in me. This world showed me its dark face so brutally that now I think that's what my face is also. I feel I'm good for nothing. Like I'm just a mistake...."
She looked up with wet eye lashes shadowing her bloodshed eyes.
"My own kin betrayed me. I was traded. I was sold. Thrust in the hands of people who just wanted to rip me apart. Wanted to tear my skin off me. I ran away. I ran as long as I could. I stumbled into someone who's intentions are not clear. But he's not trying to catch me. He doesn't care. And It's okay. He saved me.....Why? I don't know....He isn't going to do any harm but he's the harm I don't think can ever be good for me."
Her fingers caught the soft texture of the mat beneath.
"I feel secure in his house...But that's not important. I feel.....I feel....that Allah is not happy with me. How do I make him happy? I feel Allah is far away from me in that house. I can't find Him in that there....."
Imam Sahab patted her head with kindness written on his face.
"Allah Has His own ways of saving people. You met that guy and he saved you because Allah sent him in your life. When life gets too overbearing and tough don't think that your Almighty is not happy with you. You are coming out of everything as a winner. Then how can your Almighty be not happy with you? You think you can't find Allah in your saviour's house? May be this is also a part of a bigger plan. May be he will find something through you? We know nothing. Only Allah does and his ways are the best."
Her eyes were glued to the kind face in front of her. He sighed and got up leaving her alone with her thoughts and she didn't say anything.
May be she did need this loneliness to sort things out.
____
Abeer asked the taxi driver to stop right in front of building she'd never stepped her foot into. She had purposely didn't take her car and driver with her so that her family won't know about it. She couldn't take any risk.
She pushed her chin forward with determination and came out of the Taxi. Stopping at the reception she asked for the CEO.
"Sorry mam but he had strictly asked no visitors!"
"What? Look! I have to meet him! Please try to understand. Just let me in. It won't take long."
"Mam you try to understand! Please there is no way I can let you meet him"
Abeer rolled her eyes and turned to leave with a dejected heart when she bumped into a tall figure who immediately held her from her shoulders to prevent her from falling. She looked right in the black eyes that were staring at her curiously.
"You okay there?"
She looked around and nodding pulled herself up.
"Thank You."
She mumbled grumpily and gave an angry glare in the direction of receptionist who smiled apologetically.
"What's the matter?"
"Sir she came to meet RAK but as you know no visitors for him. "
"Oh well..."
He turned around and in long strides reached the stubborn woman standing at a distance.
"Lis...!"
"Go away! I thanked you already."
She replied putting her shades on.
"So much attitude? Well If you put your ego aside for some time then I can help you."
" What kind of Help?"
"Rayyan? Meeting him? Remember?"
She looked at him as if confirming.
"You'll take me to him?"
"Of course! After all I'm his PA."
"Do you know who Am I?
He raised his eye brow. She smiled sadly and then looked up at him.
"Abeer Ahmed Khan. Your boss' Sister."
Haseeb stared her her wide eyed. He had heard about both Abeer and Rohail from Rayyan but never had he met them in person.
"Shocked? well you should be! But now you have told me you can take me where he is! So you will have to! I won't go without meeting him!"
"Look Ms Khan!"
"Yes I'm looking forward to meeting him."
"Its not that easy. He won't be very pleased."
"I know that already! Now shall we?"
Haseeb wasn't sure should he do this or not? He knew Rayyan won't be happy to see her but the girl was adamant.
"She has gone on her brother. Seriously!"
He thought and started walking towards Rayyan's cabin with Abeer closely following behind.
__________
"Come In"
He said engrossed in the file which contained the information he had asked from Haseeb. They had some leads but it was not enough to pull something big. Regina was surely good at keeping her secrets safe but not for too long. The stunt she pulled last night was the headline of tabloids and it was enough to fuel the urge for revenge. He'd got to know his assumptions were correct. The girl who was staying in his house at the moment was indeed a victim of Regina's play.
Someone entered inside and stood close to him.
"Haseeb i have read the f..."
He looked up and was shocked to see the person standing close to him.
Abeer.
"You don't have to lose your temper Bhai. I'll go within few minutes."
She said coming close to the chairs. He was seeing her after so long. Last time he had seen her when she had visited a party with her parents. She was just a teenager then but not anymore. She had grown up. Specially the way she talked to him with no nonsense attitude.
"I know you don't like us and don't even want to see our faces. I didn't come here to evoke a soft corner in your heart for me. Nah! That's not what I want. Bhai...Hate me, Hate Mom , Hate Rohail as much as you can but please Bhai! Dad ...Don't do this to him. He loves you! More than anything! More than me! More than Rohail!"
He rolled his eyes and got up. Controlling himself he was trying his best not so say anything harsh to her.
"You are no one to tell me what I should do. You are just a kid. You won't understand."
"I'm no kid! I'm twenty two for God's sake! I understand everything! What do you think? All of us are happy that you are away from us? No way Bhai! Please for once let go of this hatred and see some sense! We all want you back. We all want you to accept us. I know what happened with you..."
"DON'T!"
He growled making her flinch. Her beautiful brown eyes instantly filled with tears and he cursed himself for loosing his calm. He never meant to shout at her.
"Go away Abeer! Please! I don't want to listen anything!"
"But Bhai..."
"Go!"
She wiped her tears and nodded.
"Okay....RAK..."
With a dejected face she turned around and left his cabin. His cold behavior was ripping her insides out. All her life she had gotten love from everyone. Be it her parents, Rohail, Or her friends and fellows. But this guy was the only person who hated her and it always made her sad.
Haseeb who was standing just after Rayyan's cabin entered inside.
"You shouted at her?"
"I didn't mean to but she just pushed my wrong buttons."
"Are you a damn remote control? that by pushing any wrong button you'll start working the way you shouldn't? She had tried hard for this meet! And look what she got! You are hopeless RAK. All these years you always told me You hold no grudge against Rohail and Abeer now what happened?"
"Haseeb! Stop it!"
Haseeb shook his head and looked through the glass window. His eyes instantly fell on the figure in that peach top and jeans. She was stopping a Taxi wiping her tears.
"Poor soul. See how dejectedly she is hiring a Taxi!"
Rayyan's head whipped towards him.
"W*F? Taxi?"
He came to the window hurriedly. She was still standing on the road. He glanced at his watch. Seven in the evening. Not knowing how to say this to Haseeb he looked here and there.
"Don't worry! I'll drop her."
Haseeb said patting his shoulder and left from there.
____________
"Hey!"
She turned and found Haseeb running towards her.
"Come I'll drop you off."
"No thanks! I came by Taxi and will go by a taxi only. You don't have to bother."
The girl really had got attitude problem. Just like her brother.
"Look Ms Khan. I'm not dying to drop you at your place. It's your brother you who has sent me here."
"He did?"
She was surprised.
"Yup or why would I be here? Come!"
She felt immense happiness filling her heart. May be Rohail was right. May be Rayyan cared just didn't want to show it. She followed Haseeb and sat beside him in his car. There was a complete silence. At last Haseeb initiated the talk.
" You can very well see he isn't that bad. It's just he doesn't like to show his concern and care to anyone. Don't ever think he hates you or Rohail. He doesn't. "
"I didn't know. But see I was right. My visit here proved to be a fruitful one. Now I know he doesn't hate me. I'm happy."
Haseeb looked at her bright smile and smiled himself too.
"Now I'm just waiting for the time when he will accept mom and dad too and will be back to us."
"Well I really doubt that will happen but there is no harm in hoping so."
"This will happen! I'm sure!"
She said stubbornly.
"May God prove it true."
______
Izma was taking hurried step following her husband to an unknown destination. She had found him talking suspiciously with someone over phone and the mention of Noor and alerted her. She knew there was something fishy. Asim wasn't ready to tell her about it. Noor's number being unreachable, No contact from Sarmad and Asim's hurried attempts at brushing off the topic. All this couldn't be just a co incidence. Her heart was sinking thinking of all the possible reasons for this mess. She saw him entering a small building and once he was in she followed him and stopped outside a door. She was shocked to see Sarmad there.
He was in town? Then Noor must be here too.
But why he didn't bring her to meet them?
She frowned when Sarmad clutched Asim's collar. On nearing she could clearly listen what he was saying. She stood rooted to her spot listening to each and every word.
"Noor...."
She whispered painfully and not being able to stand there anymore ran out feeling a dread like never before creeping in.
__________
He had just reached his house and asked Sabahat to make a cup of coffee for him. The day had drained him both physically and emotionally. The face off with Abeer was still fresh in his mind and his own reaction to her safety too. He took a deep sigh. Sometimes, no matter how much he tried he just can't do without this not caring business.
Care...
His eyes darted towards the particular room at this word just when Sabahat came with his coffee.
"Where is she?"
"Who sir?"
"That girl....Noor."
"Must be in her room."
Sabahat went to check but he could tell something was wrong. And his suspicious was right. Sabahat's worried face told him his intution was right. He got up with a jerk.
"She's not in her room."
"Damn it!"
He dragged a hand through his already messy mop of hair. Could this day get any better?
In his fury his heart did beat in a weird way. Like the idea of her disappearing was not setting well with it but as usual he ignored it.
____
A/N: Thank you for making this story reach 61 in Spiritual Last week. This support is everything to me. ❤