RAIN POUNDED AGAINST THE HILTON INN'S glass in the chilly 7:30 evening. Takashi sat on the hotel's small love seat couch, in the dark. It's where he's been since six in the morning as soon as he showered and brushed his teeth. It was his first movement from the bed in days. He still wore the same deadpan expression, being motionless and staring at nothingness.
Not even Toryn's confession of regaining her memory had garnered a reaction out of him. She had delivered the message to him through voicemails and text messages days ago. It partially made him feel good, but it didn't last long. He couldn't sleep, eat or function. He had no clue what time it was, what day it was or what was going on around him. He felt weak both physically and mentally.
His phone started buzzing on the bed and he glanced at it. He tried to keep himself occupied with happy thoughts because sometimes he would hear his mother's voice. Especially when he closed his eyes. It was the most cruelest thing his mind was doing to him. So he fought sleep and always tried to keep himself busy.
He got up and walked over to the bed. He picked the phone up, dressed in only black sweatpants that began to sag a little due to the couple of pounds he'd lost during his two week stay. He saw ten new text messages and five new voicemails from today alone. Not feeling like reading anything, he opted to listen to the voicemails only.
The automated female voice machine came on, "New voicemail...today at eleven thirty two AM..." after a beep, the sound of a sniffling Braelyn came on. "Um...hi honey, it's Braelyn. I'm not calling to be annoying I'm just really worried about you. I hope you're okay, Bri asks for you everyday. I miss you and I wish you would just come home. I just want you to know I'm here for you, I love you."
The message finished as a new one came on. It started with a little static in the back and weird noises as if the person was fumbling with the phone. Takashi walked over to the hotel bedroom window, using his index and middle fingers to push the blinds apart. He peeked outside just in time to see lightening turn the world silver for a moment.
"New voicemail...today at six o' clock PM...Hey Takashi this is Tyrell...uh...bro, don't be pissed. I messed up but I spoke to your wife today... and she broke me. I told her where you are. I know, I'm sorry, but she was so distraught. The crying got to me, man. I'm sorry, don't be mad."
Takashi sucked his teeth violently, glaring at the phone as if it was Tyrell himself. The voicemail was left over an hour and a half ago, which meant Braelyn got the drop some time ago. But it would still take some time for her to get out here, which Takashi hoped she wouldn't.
Just as he was about to play another message there was a knock on his room door. He knew it obviously wasn't Braelyn. He figured it was room service. Every time they came he sent them away. The last three days they were coming frequently however, knocking more than two or three times a day sometimes. He figured the staff were beginning to think he was into some shady business and was getting suspicious of the man who never came out of his room.
Takashi figured just to ease their minds he would show his face this time, just to show them he was a normal man in hopes of them leaving him alone. He walked over to the door and pulled the latch off, opening the door. He saw Toryn and instead of his eyebrows raising, they pushed together. He was surprised, but his face only showed limited expressions these days.
He looked behind her and saw a big, burly Asian security guard. Probably skeptical that she knew the person up here. Takashi just stepped to the side and opened the door wider for her to step in. He closed the door behind him and turned to face her. She was soaked from head to toe, showing that nature had won against her battle to stay dry. Toryn was livid, the weather was so bad outside the water had started building up in certain areas. Some asshole taxi driver had sped past and drenched her in nasty flood water.
She said nothing to him as she went into the bathroom and closed the door behind herself. Takashi soon heard the shower come on and he sat on the bed, putting his hands over his face. He had no clue how she found him, but he wasn't ready to deal with anyone yet. He just wanted to be left alone. What was so hard about that? He would only have needed a month or two the most. It sounded long but it really wasn't.
Toryn scrubbed her hair inside the shower, cursing loudly as she only had a tiny sample bottle of soap and shampoo. She used up both bottles, determined to scrub her body clean. She knew room service had hundreds of these things for their guests so Takashi could get plenty. She wasn't worried about using all of it. She wouldn't take the chance of getting any ring worms or infections from the puddle water outside. After hand washing her undergarments she hung them up, hoping to ask the hotel to wash her clothes.
Toryn stepped out and wrapped a white towel from the built in rack on the wall around herself. She was shivering and cold. She walked into the bedroom and spotted Takashi's duffle bag sitting on the floor near the closet. He noticed her going through his things but he said nothing. There was nothing anyone could do or say that would warrant a reaction from him.
He saw Toryn grab one of his plain white t-shirts and a pair of boxers before she disappeared behind him. Probably to get dressed. He was right when in less than a minute she appeared in front of him, with folded arms. He stared at her bubble gum painted toe nails first before his eyes slowly came upward. One of her long legs crossed over the other. His plaid boxers covered her and his plain white tee came down a little past her thighs. It had almost three weeks since they were face to face.
He was looking good still, but clearly stressed. His eyes were no longer the same and neither was his smile. He didn't look like a broken man, but Toryn knew him. If she didn't have her memory he may have been able to fool her, but she was her old self again. She knew him better than he knew himself. He was hurting. Toryn stood in front of him, her brown eyes stinging with salt water.
Takashi's eyes met her's and a dark silence fell over the room. "Why are you here?" He whispered. It was the first words he'd spoken to her in two weeks.
He knew maybe she was here because she was probably wondering about her living arrangements. Now that Laura was dead the house had to go on sale. He didn't think his mom had finished paying the house down so it wasn't written in a will for him. Because of that, Takashi would have to find somewhere for her to stay. The house she was in for now would probably be where he would keep her.
Toryn stared at him, ignoring his question as she tapped her foot repeatedly, arms folded and seeming upset. Takashi was confused. He wondered if he had done something to her. Then he realized. Maybe there was no food in the house. How had she been eating for the past few weeks? Was the heat in the house not working? Did she have any money on her?
Toryn watched her best friend, his brown skin not really seeming to glow anymore. The moon wasn't out so that could have had something to do with it, but she seriously doubted it. She hated to see him like this.
Takashi just watched her back not knowing what to say to her. He noticed she had her glasses on. Her huge black nerdy prescriptions. The one trait about her that was the old Toryn. She wasn't in her contacts and her hair wasn't down or in bundles. It was in a ponytail, he even noticed her eyes the size of dishes through her thick lens...she was his dork again.
Toryn's lips trembled as she came toward him, shuffling so hard, the soles of her feet could be heard scraping the cheap carpet. She dropped to her knees between his legs and stretched her arms toward him. Placing one of her small hands on the back of his head, she pulled him down into her body. His face went in the crock of her neck as she wrapped her arms around him in a warm embrace.
It was silent for two seconds. And just like that...he cracked.
Takashi burst into tears as he gripped Toryn tightly, now pulling her into his body. He held her like she personally belonged to him as his hands trembled. Hot tears raced down his face as he let out every bit of pain into her. Toryn couldn't hold her composure as she cried silently with him, his broken heart affecting her in so many ways.
The wind whipped outside harsh and unrelenting, blocking out the sounds of his agony. Toryn was almost glad for it, she didn't want the sound of a man in pain to haunt her. His body racked violently. Anyone passing may have thought he was laughing at a really good joke, but it was him unsuccessfully trying to keep the painful sounds of an imaginary knife poking at his heart, at bay.
Toryn didn't want to say something stupid like 'everything is going to be okay' because it wouldn't be. His mother was dead. A woman who had him at only fourteen and raised him. A woman who was honestly his first best friend. His first love. She was gone and never coming back. The woman he had the luxury of having in his life for twenty five years...she was now a part of the earth's soil. There was absolutely nothing she could say, so that's exactly what she said, nothing. She just stayed silent and allowed him to cry.
His skin was hot, he was squeezing her body so tightly it hurt. He sobbed, the sound of his tears resembling the hard drops of rain outside when it hit her skin. Toryn looked straight ahead across the room unblinking as her own face was cold and wet from her tears as well. Toryn was hurting too, but she could never put herself on the level of pain he was in.
While Laura did take her in and become her family, that was Takashi's blood family. And even though Toryn's feelings did come close, nobody would ever really understand how he felt. She closed her eyes, inhaling his scent as she rubbed the back of his head. They stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity; but Toryn didn't care. Nothing else mattered right now.
Lightening ripped through the sky, followed by raging thunder. Toryn closed her eyes which did nothing to help the stream of her tears. Takashi held onto her for dear life. After a while he had become quiet, but never broke his hold on her. She sniffled and when she tried to move Takashi gripped her tighter. She knew he probably didn't want her to see his face.
"Taka..."
The minute Takashi heard that sweet voice in his ear he knew she remembered. Just from her tone alone. It's exactly how the old Toryn said his name. He clenched his jaws as millions of tiny goosebumps took over his arms. Even though he received this news about her memory a while ago, things were way too hectic for him to really soak it in. Now that he was seeing her up close, he was soaking it in.
"You're hurting me," Toryn said softly. She hated to complain at a time like now, but she could literally almost feel both sides of her ribcage touching.
Takashi's head was pounding and he felt numb. Physically and emotionally. It had him questioning God at this point. If God was real, what kind of God would make a normal human being suffer this way? He wasn't a rapist or a murderer. He didn't pray on the poor and needy or young and old. He wasn't perfect...but why did his punishment have to be so harsh? What did he do?
"Taka I promise I'm not going anywhere, I just need you to let up a bit." Toryn pleaded softly.
Takashi finally let go like she asked, but quickly placed his elbows on his knees and put his hands over his face. Toryn stood up and felt every bone in her body crack as she did a minor stretch. She felt so bad for him knowing there was nothing she could do to ease his pain. "No Tee, don't do that," She whispered, wrapping her hands around his wrist. His muscles tightened, signaling he wasn't moving his hands from his face.
The room was quiet, the TV screen black and the plain white walls almost too clean to look at. Toryn knew better than to stand there and stare at him, looking sympathetic. So she instead pulled his head into her stomach and began massaging the top of his head, telling him random things. She talked about seeing this dress she liked at the mall, and about juicy TV shows.
She had actually learned this trait in the Spice mansion. So many of the men came in there and it wasn't always to have sex. Some of them had miserable lives and they used the hookers as a listening ear. She's seen some men cry over the years for various reasons. She learned that it wasn't smart to ask somebody dumb stuff she knew the answers too or stare them in the face when they were obviously feeling some type of way. Instead you consoled them and just made conversation. Even if they weren't talking back, just like Takashi wasn't. It just made them feel comfortable and not self conscious like they were no longer men because they were showing emotion. She didn't want to bring Laura up because if he wanted to talk about it he would. It was better not to force it.
Toryn amused herself telling him stories. She had not the slightest idea if he was listening or not, but she rambled off, reminding him of some type of incident on their thirteenth birthday. The calm nature in the room didn't last long as a hard crackling followed by what sounded like a drum set falling out of the sky vibrated the building, making Toryn nearly scream. Rain started to come down even harder as thunder and lightening lit up the skies. Just when she had calmed things down, nature had put a damper on the mood.
Toryn put a hand on her heart and was getting ready to laugh to herself about how shook she just got, when Takashi unexpectedly pulled her hand. He tugged on her so hard she flew forward, falling on top of him. She put her hands out to try and brace her fall but ended up straddling his lap, putting them face to face. Before Toryn could protest, Takashi buried his face in her breasts and locked his arms around her waist. He didn't mean anything by it, he just wanted to be close to someone.
Toryn didn't know what to say in that moment. She was like a deer caught in headlights. Her fast heartbeat...she knew he could feel it. The t-shirt she wore wasn't much of a barrier against the heat of his bare flesh. Toryn hesitated but wrapped her arms around his head...it felt right. This was Takashi Maxwell. Her best friend. Taka.
Toryn rested her chin on top his head but didn't say anything.
She honestly wanted them to go back to his second house, the one she was staying at. Everything he needed was already there. She wanted him as close to her as possible because she didn't know how his mental was right now. She didn't exactly know if he was suicidal, because they had never gone through a dire situation for her to know if he would take his life or not; but she would never put anything past anybody.
"...She died in the house by herself...she was left there for hours." His voice was frail and hoarse. "...I didn't even get to say bye to her."
"C'mere baby..." Toryn whispered, lifting his chin up so she could see him. "I know, and I'm so sorry for that. Ma knows you love her, and you know that too. It was peaceful, no pain. She's in heaven where she belongs and she needs you to lift yourself up to make her proud."
His phone pinged on the pillow nearby.
"She needed me to be a son and I wasn't. She needed me to pay for her operation and I couldn't." He said, his face damp with guilt and shame. His eyelashes were wet and shiny.
Toryn put her hands on either side of his face, looking into his eyes. His arms were still around her protectively. He looked like a broken little boy. They were inches apart from each other, his large hands holding her waist. Toryn bent down and closed her eyes before kissing his temple, then the bridge of his nose.
"Don't blame yourself, it wasn't your fault and you know your mother would never think that either. I'll never tell you it's gonna be okay because it won't be. And I'm not gonna tell you things will go back to normal because it probably won't. But I can tell you this," she softly swiped her thumb across his cheek, their brown eyes making direct eye contact as she rose her eyebrows. "I need you here, with me."
He said nothing else and returned his face to her chest like a shy little boy. The rain poured outside, causing cars to drench the sidewalk as they sped by. It was so hard for Toryn herself. Laura was her mother figure, her dad's best friend. She wondered how their relationship was. Her nor Takashi never got to ask. Toryn looked up at the ceiling when she felt tears of her own coming. God please do not let me start in front of this man, she prayed. She needed to hold it together, not make things worse.
Toryn felt her chin being pulled down, looking into Takashi's diamond shaped eyes.
"Yeah...what's up?" Toryn mumbled, putting her hand over his as he held her chin. His hands were slim but large and masculine. They were so big compared to her's. Her best friend really did become a man.
His phone pinged again.
Takashi's heart was running rampant. It felt like a hamster in a hamster's wheel. Just racing a mile a minute. He was breathing a little funny and his chest felt heavy, but he didn't know why. He guessed it was from his lack of movement for the past few days. "Promise me you'll never forget about me again...please."
"I promise, we'll always be together."
Takashi nodded his head and placed his hands back on her waist. They subconsciously moved upward under the t-shirt, stopping just below her breasts. Toryn had to hold her breath, suddenly remembering just how physically close they were. He closed his eyes and rested on her. He could feel the metallic shaped toy rings in her nipples against his face. If only he could go back in time and change everything. His mother would still be alive.
Toryn picked his head up, a soft smile on her face. "I love you, stink. And I'll be next to you no matter what. Nobody can break our bond." She wiped a tear forming in his right eye. "So please don't cry, you still have me and I'm not going anywhere." Toryn gave his forehead a friendly kiss, then his neck, then his cheek.
She felt Takashi's nails dig into her sides, indicating her words were getting to him. It was making him more vulnerable but it's what he needed to hear right now. She continued to kiss him and whisper words of encouragement in his ear.
Before she knew it, he laid her back on the bed and was on top of her. His pendulum swinging back and forth. Toryn's eyebrows got into a perfect arch as her mouth turned into an 'o.' She watched Takashi's face coming toward her and tried to pull her head back, but it didn't really go anywhere, already sitting on top of a plush white pillow. Takashi bent down, his voice shaking by her ear.
"Tell me you love me..."
Toryn froze, not knowing what to do. He placed a left palm on her face, feeling the warmth that radiated off her skin. He pulled away after five seconds of her silence and his eyes were almost a perfect mixture of pink and red. He looked down at her, clenching his jaws.
"Tee Tee please baby, just tell me you love me..."
"I do, Taka. I love you."
Takashi looked up by the headboard and saw Laura's beautiful face. He imagined her yelling at him, telling him to get his fast behind off Toryn and go into his room. Toryn who laid underneath him just looked up. She could hear his teeth clicking and watched as he blinked profusely, as he tried to hold it together. She pulled him down which he allowed, softly massaging the top of his scalp.
They stayed quiet for what seemed like forever, but if it was going to take forever to keep Takashi sane, then Toryn had an eternity to waste.
*******
BRAELYN BANGED AS HARD AS SHE could on the hotel's room door. Her tiny fists throbbed and tingled in pain. She recited a prayer in her head as she impatiently waited for Takashi to open the room door. She stood out in the hall with a big Asian security guard that seemed a bit puzzled and apprehensive.
Unbeknownst to Braelyn, the security guard knew somebody else was in the room with the man. At first when Braelyn came to the front desk in search of one of the customers, the man was close to putting Braelyn out, thinking that they were coming in one by one, trying to turn the hotel room into some kind of party. When the woman pulled out her debit card that in fact matched the same card the man had used to pay for the room and showed her license that had the same last name as him, he knew she authentically knew the occupant. He low key wanted drama now that he realized this was in fact the man's wife, because nothing really happened on his shift.
"Ma'am please try not to knock so loudly." The security guard said, worried she was causing a disturbance. She was hardly giving the person time to even come to the door.
Braelyn ignored the man and was just about to knock again when the door finally opened. She almost leapt forward until she saw Toryn standing there, rubbing her eyes. The girl was braced against the door, clearly having been disturbed from a deep sleep. Braelyn's eyes started from the tip of Toryn's head, slowly going down. She watched in shock as Toryn stood in the doorway in her husband's boxers and t-shirt. All the color drained from the wife's face. If there was tension, the ladies sure didn't speak on it.
Toryn was caught off guard not expecting it to be Braelyn. She had only come to the door, ready to curse whoever out for disturbing them. Takashi was sleeping and she didn't want anybody bothering him. Toryn's sleepiness however disappeared like a drunkard sobbering up in the face of a critical situation. She stuttered for a few seconds before itching the back of her neck.
"He's asleep..." She mumbled. It was the only thing she could manage to say. She didn't know what else to say. Their last encounter was at the funeral and they hadn't even spoken then. Their run in before that was not so pleasant either when Braelyn came out the side of her neck, accusing her of being a sidechick.
Braelyn rushed into the room and spotted Takashi on the hotel bed. Right then the mixed emotions flooding through her were all too much at once for her to convey what all her feelings were. Braelyn slowly walked over and gently peeled the sheets back. He had no shirt on. Did they have sex? Why is she here? Is this why he's been ignoring me for two weeks? To be with Toryn?
The first thing Braelyn noticed was his slightly narrower face and lighter body. He had lost a tremendous amount of weight. Her heart burned for him. She didn't know whether to be angry or sad right now. Here he was in a hotel room laying in bed with another woman; but here was also the man she loved suffering from a broken heart and she couldn't help him.
"Tee..." Braelyn whispered softly, running her hand over his waves. She was stooped down to the floor.
Toryn appeared beside her, knowing Braelyn could feel how awkward things felt. "Um...he just fell asleep. I wouldn't wake him."
Braelyn ignored her and continued to call his name, softly running her hands over his head. She certainly was not going to let some outsider tell her how she should interact with her own husband. Soon he began to stir and when he opened his eyes he wasn't sure if he was seeing correctly. Still pink and red, Takashi's eyes peeked from behind their lids as he eyed his wife.
"Brae?"
She smiled, "Hi, honey. I'm so happy to see you..."
He peeled the sheets back and stood up, almost falling over. Braelyn caught him knowing that he got up too fast. Takashi wrapped his arms around her and looked up at the ceiling, closing his eyes. He was clenching his jaws and sucking air in through his nose, trying to stop any form of emotion. Toryn felt a little jealous, only because she felt Braelyn shouldn't be witnessing Taka in his rawest form. In his most vulnerable state. She may have been his wife but she really knew nothing about him.
"I missed you so much." Braelyn said, her voice muffling into his neck.
Takashi rested his forehead against her shoulder. He couldn't lie, it felt good to see her. He still wasn't really ready to be around anybody, but the love felt good. He didn't say anything though, knowing if he opened his mouth he would cry. Braelyn pulled away to continue her declaration of love until Toryn cleared her throat, reminding them of the extra company.
Braelyn and Takashi's eyes met and both knew she was asking for answers.
Takashi's heart started racing again and he got a little lightheaded, rubbing his temples, "She just showed up, Braelyn. I didn't invite her here." He whispered, pledging his innocent.
"Showed up?"
"Yeah, she came to support me."
"Okay."
"He's serious...he didn't know I was coming. I managed to get a friend to help me track him." Toryn said not wanting to share the full secret.
Takashi looked at her like she was crazy but neither female had their attention on him. Braelyn gave a curt smile.
"How nice of you, I would have been really grateful if you contacted me as well, but I guess not. I guess your only mission was to rush to your best friend and no else mattered. I understand."
Toryn already saw where this was going, she was playing that territorial game. And Toryn had no time for it. "Contact you with what? My ass? Do I have your phone number?"
"Toryn." Takashi called. "Just chill, please."
"If you had the time to track my husband down, I'm pretty sure you could have found a way to get my number."
"Brae."
"Yeah and why would I? Did you not accuse me of being his mistress last time?"
"I wonder why." She said looking Toryn's attire up and down. Her breasts were perfectly visible through the shirt.
Toryn rolled her eyes, "Takashi and I didn't do anything."
"I know, you came here to talk." Braelyn blinked, her tone oozing sarcasm.
"Braelyn...Toryn..." Takashi pleaded, "...just stop."
Both women looked at the most important man in their life and looked down at the ground in shame. A moment after the silence, Braelyn opened her mouth to be the bigger woman and apologize, but a deafening crash startled the women and the security guard as they all looked over and saw Takashi laid on the floor, accidentally having destroyed a lamp he took down with him.
"Taka!"
"Tee!"
"Shit!"
The two women and the security rushed to his aid as Braelyn got on the ground and picked his head up, resting it on her lap. His eyes were droopy, but he was still talking. He even started smiling a little bit as he carried on a conversation of gibberish with himself.
"What's wrong with him?!" Braelyn asked, terrified.
"He probably just passed out." The security guard said.
"Please call some medics!" Braelyn said.
The man took the walkie talkie off his waist and began to speak in code. The hotel was stationed right across the street from a nursing home. Because so many of the people there were so old, EMT's were always present. Another security guard in the lobby got the message through the walkie talkie and went outside to retrieve help.
By time they came Takashi was already starting to come around again. He reached his hand out for Toryn who quickly got on the other side of him, holding his other hand. Braelyn rolled her eyes at this but said nothing as she continued to pet his hair and kiss his cheek.
"Hey, you okay?" Toryn asked.
"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" He said trying to sit up.
Both girls pushed him back, speaking at the same time to tell him not to move. Nobody knew for sure what was wrong and they just wanted to wait until professionals got here to do the real assessing.
"Why not? Why are we on the ground?" Takashi mumbled, rubbing the side of his head.
"You passed out." Toryn informed.
EMT's arrived in the room and began unloading equipment. Oh nah, Takashi thought when he saw the foldable stretcher. He was slightly embarrassed, thinking they were doing too much. If they thought he was going outside on that stretcher then they were gonna be real salty taking that thing right the fuck back outside patient-less.
One of the ladies were allowed to stay for support but one of them had to move for them to hook up medical equipment to him. Braelyn clearly wasn't going anywhere so Toryn moved back. They began to take his vitals and pressures while Takashi looked up at Braelyn. He wanted to get a good look at her titties but as usual she was covered from head to toe like a Muslim.
"Brae..." He mumbled.
She tore her eyes away from the machine and down at him. He was biting his bottom lip and had a mischievous look in his eyes. He was bored and wanted to fuck with her. "You gon' let me skeet skeet in that?"
Two male EMT's looked at each other and started giggling, shaking their head. Braelyn was confused. "Skeet in what? Is that slang for skating? Skeeting in the ice rink or something? Sure...I'll let you skeet anywhere you want honey, okay?"
"Aight." Takashi said, holding his laugh in.
He was lifted off the floor and once again didn't have that perfect balance right away; but after several seconds he was fine. He shook hands were the medical staff as they packed their equipment.
"You'll be fine, you're just really dehydrated and you haven't eaten in a while. Your body is weak. You need a lot of food and water as soon as possible."
"Thank you." He said.
After everyone left, it was just Toryn, Takashi and Braelyn in the room. Takashi walked over and grabbed a shirt out of his luggage before walking back over to Braelyn. She attacked him with a hug, squeezing him like he would disappear if she let go. "Oh my gosh! You stress me out so much. The weather is terrible and you were out here all alone. Do you see what would have happened if I hadn't come out? You would have been all by yourself passed out on the ground!"
"Um...he wouldn't be alone. I was here." Toryn corrected with a slight attitude, not knowing if she was trying to be slick or not.
"Not to be rude but why are you here? Oh yeah, to be a friend right?" Braelyn capped.
"Why are you here?" Takashi asked way harder then he meant too.
The room turned silent and immediately he regretted saying it. He didn't mean it in the way it came out. As if he wanted Toryn here but not Braelyn. He didn't want either of them here to be honest. He asked Toryn the same question when she came through the door. He didn't want to sound like an asshole as if he didn't appreciate the people who cared about him; but he was also annoyed at the fact nobody was respecting he didn't want to be tracked down or have his location told. He knew he had a family and people who were worried about him. But given the situation, he felt he had the right to choose if he wanted a crowd around him or to be left the fuck alone for a few days.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean that...not like that."
Toryn stood in the back giggling while Braelyn just stood there looking dumb. Takashi turned and gave Toryn a pleading look to stop, before grabbing his wife's hand and pulling her out the room and into the hallway for some privacy. He braced her against the white painted wall and put his hand next to her head, the other massaging his throbbing temple.
Braelyn looked down the left side of the empty hallway. Her arms were crossed and she just stood there, bouncing her leg up and down. Takashi didn't even know what to say for a moment. He was so use to not really saying anything for the past few weeks he was almost forgetting how to talk.
"I'm sorry Braelyn I didn't mean it that way. Of course I'm glad you came. You care about me and I appreciate that...can you look at me please?"
A metal cart came into view as an old white lady began knocking on the door at the very end of the hallway. Room service probably. The person opened the door seconds later and the woman smiled, pushing her cart inside before the door closed behind her; but Braelyn's eyes never moved.
"Don't be mad Brae, it was just a wrong choice of words. I would never not want you around me. You know that."
Braelyn turned to him with a sharp glare in her glassy eyes. "Did you say the same thing to her? Or is it just me? You're just wondering why I came? Is that why you've been dodging me so long? Because you've been here with her for two weeks?"
"No, Braelyn, no. She literally just came like two hours before you did. And yes I asked her why she came. I don't even know how she found me. I just heard her say it when you did. I wanted to be alone, I was gonna come around when I was ready."
"Well gee, I'm sorry that all I ever wanted was to be your wife, Takashi." She wept. "I know you want to be alone sometimes, but you shut me out of everything. I just want to be able to hug you and tell you how much I love you. I just want to be there for you. I don't want you to go through this alone. I love you so much and when you treat me like I'm nobody, it hurts me."
He ran a hand down his face, everything she was saying sinking in.
"I don't want to stress you out, I'm not trying to argue with you. I just want some things to be a you and I thing. To be a family thing. You go to her for everything when you have me. Please stop isolating me, Takashi."
The hotel door opened up and Toryn stuck her head out. Usually she would let him handle his business on his own, but given the situation Braelyn had some nerve to be on level ten knowing that he was not in the right state of mind for the back and forth. Toryn didn't know what the hell she was yelling about but she could hear her squeaky ass voice even through the closed door.
Toryn walked up to him. "You okay?"
Braelyn just narrowed her eyes and glared, her arms still folded; the nerve of this girl.
Takashi looked over his shoulder even though he couldn't see her. "Toryn give me a minute, please."
Toryn looked at him with her tiny bottom lip in a pout. What she wanted him to do was come back inside with her and leave Braelyn out in the hall. She was doing way too much and he didn't deserve to be stressed out right now. Instead she sighed and nodded as she turned around and went back inside the room. Takashi watched as she closed the door first before putting his attention back on Braelyn.
"This is the exact behavior I'm talking about. No woman who's just a friend behaves like that. If you're alright? Seriously? She's allowed to ask you if you're alright while you're speaking to your wife? Who is she to do that?"
"Do you see how I felt when your coworker did it?"
Braelyn gave him a look
"Alright, seriously. I'll talk to her about it but you have to stop being so jealous Brae. You're not like that and when you stressed out and angry it bothers me too."
"Then stop the things that you do to stress me out and I won't be stressed out. You need to let that girl know she's just a friend and she needs to stay in a friend's place. Your behavior with her is super inappropriate and this hotel thing is a prime example. Would you like it if I was wearing my male friend's boxers and shirt sleeping in a bed with him?"
"I got you Brae, I understand." He mumbled. He honestly didn't see the issue, but his relationship with Toryn had always been the odd ball out. He sighed, picking up the back of her hand to kiss it. "Please don't be mad. I'll come home tonight, alright? Just let me pack my stuff and I'll meet you downstairs. Fair?"
Braelyn tiptoed to kiss him and paused when she saw dry trails staining his cheeks. "Honey were you crying?"
"No," He answered instantly, looking away.
Braelyn could tell he was lying off the bat. She couldn't lie, she felt hurt. She knew he couldn't control his emotions and when and where he released them. But she wished it had been her to see her husband break down. It would make their bond stronger. To know that it was in front of Toryn bruised her heart and ego.
Takashi saw the look on her face and was taken aback. "Are you serious? What is this to you? Some kind of who got to see Takashi sad first thing?" He asked, his voice still low and soft.
For a moment all Braelyn did was blink at him. Then she closed her eyes and opened her mouth, before suddenly stopping short. She reopened her brown orbs, looking into her husband's own. How fast he misinterpreted was not surprising. "Takashi don't."
"Don't what?" He said waving her off, "Talk about how you really mad because I went to Toryn first, like this is some sort of competition shit to you?"
Braelyn looked off to the side. The hall was pin drop silent, they could even hear the rain outside. Takashi was livid. This is the main reason he didn't want to be around anyone in the start. He hated showing emotion—he prided himself on that. The minute he did, Braelyn had turned it into a game.
"First of all this is not a competition to me. Because you know I would never want to see you cry, you know that. I'm not mad that you did, I just wished it was with me is all, that's all Takashi...". She then gave him a tight lipped smile, "You know what Tee, forget it. I shouldn't even be doing this with you right now. I'll be downstairs waiting on you, okay?" She tiptoed and kissed his cheek.
Takashi watched her walk down the hall before she disappeared out of sight. How was it possible to feel dead inside and like an asshole at the same time? He couldn't take all this drama, he needed them right now but both girls were on some egotistical 'I'm more important' shit. Going back into the bedroom, Takashi informed Toryn that he was gonna leave with Braelyn.
"Why?"
"I don't need the headache and the accusations right now, Toryn. I'm not in the mood for it." He whispered, clearly fed up.
Toryn might have had her memories, but her old personality was gone. The old her would have quietly accepted it, but not now. She'd been through too much and changed too much to let him easily call the shots. "No, for what? I can be here for you too."
"Toryn, I said please, not now. I really can't take this drama shit. Please?"
Toryn began to blink back tears, feeling her heart cave in. She remembered how she came over nobody when it came to him. Maybe it was the child in her and she was being selfish; but she felt like she should have been before Braelyn. It was his wife she knew that, but their relationship was different. They knew each other since they were five. They had the same birthday. They did everything together. Braelyn has only known him for seven years, but Toryn knew him for a lifetime. His fake ass marriage meant nothing to her.
Takashi watched Toryn shuffle around the room in silence. He felt bad and he did want her to stay with her, but he couldn't send Braelyn away. She already came out here in this terrible weather and he already ignored her texts and calls for two weeks. On top of that their marriage already had a strain on it. He couldn't keep pushing her away.
Takashi sighed, "Tee Tee I haven't spoken to her—"
"In two weeks. I know because you haven't spoken to me either. But you think one more night is going to kill her? You know I understand your feelings better. She knows absolutely nothing about what Laura means to us."
Takashi felt an instant headache coming on. "She needs me, Tee Tee."
"I need you!" Her voice cracked as she smashed her fingers into her chest. It might have sounded selfish knowing he had a family, but this was monumental for them. She had remembered twenty five years of friendship. His family would be there tomorrow...her memory may not be. "I can forget you in three days or a month from now! I just wanted a night to be here with you."
Takashi walked into the room and gathered all of his things, slipping his sneakers and jacket on last. He then walked over to Toryn and hugged her, he had so much to say but he didn't want to say anything. She wouldn't understand. It was beyond reasons that she thought, which is why he really couldn't stay in this hotel room. He refused to break Braelyn's heart.
On his way out he dropped $200 on the small table. It was enough for a taxi back home and to buy food for the night.
*********
BRAELYN SAT ON TAKASHI'S LAP, moving her tiny palms over his chest. He was laid out on the bed with his eyes closed, allowing Braelyn to massage him. They were in their bedroom, the TV on but the volume on zero. Braelyn took her time rubbing her thumbs into his sides. He was so skinny. She could see the outline of his ribs more easier then before. It hurt her.
She cleared her throat and looked at his face, noticing his soft breathing. Must've fell asleep, she thought, but she didn't stop as she continued her relaxation method. She wanted him to sleep as deep as he could. She had fed him earlier. He ate two servings of chicken parmesan with a heaping side of steamed vegetables and probably about four and a half glasses of ice cold water. His body had been starved and in dire need of hydration just like the medics had said.
Rubbing the tension out of his shoulders, Braelyn bent down and kissed the spot right above his naval. She immediately knew he was awake because he sucked his stomach in. It must have tickled. She looked up and met his gaze, his eyes droopy and his voice raspy.
"What you doing?"
"Sorry...am I being weird?" She smiled, she figured that was a better place instead of kissing his face which she knew for certain would wake him.
"You always being weird shorty...what time is it?"
"Ten o' clock."
Braelyn was no professional at massages but she had Takashi's body feeling like jello. Every muscle on him was relaxed and it felt like for the first time in forever that the blood was circulating through his body. Even in his head. Even though his mind was clouded mentally, physically it felt good.
"Bri's coming home tomorrow, she's tearing my parents house up. She's been asking for you the whole time. She cries and she's so miserable, she doesn't listen to my parents either."
Takashi knew it was because of his absence in her life. He wouldn't know how to be able to explain it to her on why he had to leave, but he couldn't wait to see his little girl's face. He still had no idea that Braelyn knew about the paternity test and that this whole time she hadn't say anything about it.
"She's also so upset she's starting school soon. I heard she had a meltdown."
"Does she even know what school is?" Takashi softly chuckled.
"No, my parents had to explain it to her. She thinks it's some place where she's gonna sleep and live and we only get to see her once every couple of years, in her words," Braelyn giggled, "All she kept asking my mom and dad was 'if my mommy and daddy will be there.'"
Brielle was turning four soon and Braelyn wanted to start preparing her daughter for school. Some time in the week coming up she was going to take a day off work to get Brielle registered for school towards the ending of Summer. Braelyn wanted to put her in a private Christian academy, one like where she went as a child. Takashi had no objections, so it was all set in stone.
"I almost don't want to send her, she's so adorable." Braelyn smiled.
Just as she said that her phone began buzzing. She grabbed it and low and behold it was her father, video calling her on FaceTime. Braelyn figured it would be the perfect time to ask for Brielle.
"It's my dad," Braelyn said getting off of Takashi.
"Nah stay like that." He smirked trying to keep her on his lap.
"Stop it, Tee." Braelyn mumbled, climbing off of him before accepting the call. On the other end of the call was a snot nose Brielle who was crying so hard one would think the situation was serious.
"Hi honey," Braelyn smiled.
"Mama I wanna come home." She cried.
Takashi looked at the video and the toddler's face held a look of surprise. Her eyes widened and her mouth formed an O. She was silent at first as if she wasn't sure what her reaction should have been. Then as soon as she went to talk she covered her face and began to cry even harder.
"Aww, baby don't cry." Braelyn cooed, feeling sad for her daughter.
Brielle looked at the screen and began reaching for Takashi like she could touch him through the phone. She hadn't seen her daddy in forever and partially thought he didn't like her anymore. Takashi smiled, wanting to just get up and go get her. He was thinking about it honestly. "Don't cry Bri, imma see you soon okay? I miss you and I can't wait till' you come back."
"O-okay. I love you daddy."
"Daddy loves you too. Listen to grandma and grandpa and go to bed. It's late baby."
"Okay."
"Okay, goodnight." They both waved and said goodbye before Takashi cut the video off.
Braelyn sighed, "She'll get over her baby meltdown."
Takashi placed the phone down and just looked up at Braelyn. She knew when something was on his mind. She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear and looked at him questioningly. "What?"
He pulled her down and she willingly allowed him, thinking he wanted to say something to her. His hands snaked their way up her long dress, palming her soft butt cheeks. He bit his bottom lip and looked into her eyes. He noticed she didn't get the hint because she didn't respond to it. Braelyn was way too innocent for someone like him.
When he began kissing on her neck and rubbing his hands in circles on her ass, she started to raise up. He raised up with her, his lips still latched onto her neck. He smoothly unzipped her dress with his thumb and index finger and slid the sleeves off her shoulders making it pool around her waist and expose her naked upper body to the warm air. They had a very reliable heating system in the Winter.
"Tee wait, honey slow down." Braelyn said, closing her eyes at first when he hit a sweet spot on her neck. She quickly snapped out of it as she reopened her eyes. She gently pulled herself back from him before covering her breasts. "Don't you think you're moving too fast?"
"What you mean?" He said kissing all over her shoulder and cheek.
Braelyn turned his face to her so he was focused. "I mean sex," she whispered. "I think we both know that's not what you want right now. It's not what you need."
"Yeah? So what do you think I need miss?" He asked playfully.
Braelyn leaned down and hugged him. At first he was waiting for her to do something else, but she didn't. He was surprised at first, but then smiled and just hugged her back. She zipped up the top of her dress back on and kissed his cheek, putting her hands on his face. "Tomorrow I'm going to my mother's church, their having like a gathering, do you mind?"
"Nah."
"Can you come with me? It's really great and the people there are really supportive. It's like a church party, but everyone is really friendly. There's gonna be dancing, gospel singing, food. You can make lots of new friends too. There's a lot of guys that come as well. I think it would be great if you come."
"Sure Brae."
She smiled, then gasped. "Oh yeah that reminds me. Honey make sure you wear your Jesus Loves Me sweater, okay? The one I bought you for Christmas. You haven't worn it yet. Everyone will be so jealous."
Takashi immediately blocked the hard laugh in his throat and nearly choked on his own spit. He had to sit up and clear his throat, "I got you baby girl."
"Thank you," She kissed his cheek, "this will be so good for you."
Braelyn laid next to him and they spoke for a little while before she started yawning. She was the first one to fall asleep, her silky hair wild all over the pillow. Takashi took in her long ankle length pink dress and smiled. He had gotten use to her outfits now and he kind of liked them.
He looked at her long eyelashes and her pink lips, making something start coming to mind. He watched her pouting and pursing her lips a little. For the first time as he looked at Braelyn, she looked exactly like...Braelyn.