Hi my name I'm not going to tell you and I'm 15. I know Wattpad says a different age but I don't want you guy to know my real birthday.
I live in Maryland,I'm in marching band, I live with my family of 8, they aren't my real family. My real mom is my aunt and she's the main reason my life is a mess. She had this weird thing where she read books and she would choose her favorite character.
Once her favorite character was chosen she pretended to be them until she finished the books. This is the main reason she cheated on my dad multiple times and he took my 2 older siblings. When he took them my dad didn't know my mom was pregnant. My dad is now dead and my mom is in a mental asylum. My dad died from stage 3 lung cancer, he smoked a lot.
When my dad left my mom she had a lot of boyfriends. We lived in a 1 bedroom apartment at the time and I would sleep with my mom, while her boyfriend would sleep on the couch.
I'm about to tell you my darkest secret and you can't tell anyone.
One night one of her boyfriends came into her room. He thought it was my mom because we had the same brown hair. Little did he know she was throwing up in the bathroom. He raped me that night, I was 6. Ever since this time I've been dying my hair blonde. I hate brown hair.
When I told my mom she said I was lying for attention and that there is something seriously wrong with me.
After this she made me move in with my aunt, I've been living with them ever since. I have an a fake older brother,fake older sister,fake younger brother,fake younger sister, last but not least a fake youngest brother.
I'm the 3rd oldest, I share a room with my sisters and it's hell.
My best friend in the world name is Gracie. We've been best friends since the 2nd grade.
I have another best friend named nori, we got into a big fight that I'll explain later.recently we've gotten close again and I'm happy. She's really popular and pretty. Gracies really pretty too but nori is like famous at our school.
I use to have another best friend named Javier. His girlfriend didn't like me, because she didn't like me he wasn't allowed to talk to me.
I miss him so much... he made me feel better about myself and he had a way with words. I'll show you text with him and I.
He doesn't know this but whenever I get upset I read his text to remind me about him. Even though most of his text is about how I'm not myself it's so true it makes me happy. He knows me better than I know me.
This is after I went to a party and bad stuff kept happening. His house was 4 houses away and he came and saved me. The reason nori and I got into a fight and why Javier knew me better than me.
On the day April 18 2017 (spring break.) nori and I snuck out, we met with all these senior guys. They were all high and there wasn't enough room in the car so I had to sit on this guys lap. The only reason I didn't smoke was I didn't want to seem fake for coughing. First 10 seconds of getting in that car I texted Javier saying "help Javier I just made a really bad decision." That was at 12 o'clock at night, he went to sleep 2 hours earlier. Then at 3:45am I texted him again "Javier, the bad decision just got worse I need you."
Since he was asleep I posted on my Snapchat story "who's up I'm upset"
2 people responded, one of them was a girl named katie, another was a guy named issac. Issac just talked to me trying to cheer me up, katie was talking to me about the actual situation.
Katie ended up texting issac and telling him what happened. I was furious with her, and blocked both of them on Snapchat. Then they tried texting me, I blocked them. Then they tried going over Instagram, blocked them.
Next morning Javier texted me saying "What happened are you okay?" I ignored all the text till the next day. I told him about how the guy who lap I was sitting on raped me.
Since this happened a 2nd time all I could think about was how I must deserve it by now.
Afterwards katie,issac, and Javier tried talking to me at school, I ignored them all.
Javier and I ended up getting in a fight and I haven't talked to him in 4 months. I became friends with Javier's brother, his name was Vladimir. He was socially awkward but sweet, but at the same time he was a whole year younger than me. All he did was flirt and I just wanted to be not upset.
Ever since April 18th I have been extremely depressed,so bad that 3 out of 4 of my teachers asked if everything was okay in my life. I lied and told them it was nothing.
Nori ended up telling her best friend Molly that I was raped. Molly yelled at me saying I was lying. She practically told our whole school I was lying
Recently I told one of my teachers,he's my history teachers.
What happened was the month of February my crush gave me a rose every day until Valentine's Day. I ended up dating him for a month and then broke up. If y'all want a huge teddy bear I'll give it to you.
Off topic, sorry anyways my teacher noticed how uncomfortable I was. He's also the schools psychology teacher let me add. He knew something was wrong, he also pointed out that when I started getting the roses my grades started dropping. He talked to me about them.
Let me add gracie sits in the row behind me. He said "Who is giving you these roses?"
I responded saying "This guy.. why?"
"If getting all these presents get out of hand talk to me because that's haressment and we can make it go all away" he said.
I knew that he knew something was wrong. My social awkwardness got out of hand and I said quietly
"May I go to the restroom?"
He said quieter than I talked
"Are you okay? Is he in this class? Do you want me to handle this?"
I was about to cry my eyes out, since the whole class was loud I screamed
"MAY I JUST GO TO THE BATHROOM?!"
It made everyone quiet...he said yes and wrote me a pass. Gracie followed me to the bathroom, asking what happened. I didn't say anything to her and went back to class after washing my face like in the movies.
A few days later the class was in the library working on projects. My partner was Gracie. Our teacher was handing back our test and I asked him.
"Excuse me, could we talk about the rose situation?"
He literally dropped everything and said "sure"
I explained to him that gracie didn't know and even though she's my best friend I didn't want her know.
He nodded, we sat down in the middle of the library. I explained everything
my family, my friends, my grades.
He was on the verge of crying, gracie kept looking over at my and texting me asking what was wrong because our teacher looked distressed.
My teacher ended up going down to guidance and told them everything. I was stuck on the chairs in the library, he told me to go down after him to guidance in 3 minutes. I sat there for 39 minutes until he came back to the library and noticed I didn't want to move.
He brought guidance to me, I walked to the back room of the library with guidance. As I was walking back I looked at the ground, he said to me "I'm really proud of you, talk to me anytime."
Now guidance hasn't pulled me down in a week since I didn't want to talk to my birth mom about he problem. My history teacher is extremely awkward with me now. 2 weeks ago I was at the park with some friends.
They were all guys except one girl, they were also all high.the one girl named katie taking pictures for her photography class. He was at the park with his 2 kids, I yelled at my friend taking the photos.
"Katie stop I'm so ugly."
My teacher was getting his kids in the car and yelled back
"don't say that you're beautiful."
After saying that I was dying of laughter and one of guys ran over and picked me and then slapped my ass. I yelled
"STOP ____" (I don't want to put his name for personal reasons.) The rest of the guys started laughing about it. Reminder that I'm a 90 pound 5'5" girl.
The guy who slapped my ass was 6'7" guy. This guy is also in the teachers 1st block class.
Still 2 weeks later I don't know if my teacher saw that. I told him about how all my friends were generally bad people, and I can't stop being friends with them. If he did see the guy slapping my ass why didn't he say anything to me? Or try to stop them?
I'm ending this here, reminder to ask me anything. Literally anything I will answer. Till tomorrow.