I Honestly Don't Know

just venting a bit about being famous, my dad, and stuff (longgg)

i don't wanna become someone famous or well-known. i'd like to be a "normal" person. i have good reasons why i don't want to become famous. i don't want people to rely on me to make them happier. it's a lot of pressure, especially if it's a big audience. like, i have social anxiety and having that big of a responsibility, just gives me more anxiety. i also have an awful family. my dad and my mom are technically still together since they haven't properly divorced yet. my mom has a restraining order (is that what it's called???) against him, so we're trying to hide from him and being famous really doesn't help. plus, he kinda threatened my mom with a knife to her neck, so he's kinda a bad person (and i was there when it happened). he's just not the best, i mean, he was there most of my life but he's still an awful person. he'd never let my mom go out, but he would go out every night and never come back until like 3 in the morning. and his name wasn't on my birth certificate because he wasn't there when i was born, he was in jail because he was drunk and with another girl. lmao he is such an awful person. and i really hate him. but i don't??? idk, i guess i really don't care about him like i did a few years ago.