Stop crying and listen to your heart. Follow your dreams and keep your head high. Believe in yourself and keep fighting! We all have that one problem, that can neither be a bad nor good.
But believe me, It will be solved by the help of no one but Allah (SWT).
The collaboration of your heart and mind will help you also to sustain every single power that will build you up high.
When I was still in 6 years of age. I have this friend of mine whose mother is a house wife and her father was a fisherman. I idolize her father because he was so good at fishing. He can get 1000 of fishes a day. There was once, I bought a fishing rocket and fishing clothes to look like my friend's father. And without a thought, I wanted to be like him. Because for me, he was a hero. He can sustain their familys need and they are happy. Thats what i need as a human being. I asked my friend what's her ambition and she kept answering that she wanted to be a doctor. And I was a little bit confused because doctors were harsh. Once a doctor even take my front tooth, painfully. And I asked her why, and she said she's going to cure her fathers illness.
I was touched but I actually, didnt understand what she said. She was a deep person like a blackhole!
And everyday when I visit her, she studies the hardest. She scans her notes, read and write. And the days were repeating itself with the same actions she is applying. She participates in class, she exercises, she volunteers, shes attentive and good.
I dont have any idea why is she saying that unbelievable thing. And why she works hard a lot. She was just still the same year old as mine. And because of her actions, she made me feel like I was the most stupid person in the world
My ambition when I was a kid meant nothing.
One day, I questioned her again. "Why dont you want to be like your father? He is such great hero, right?" She answered and release a big gasp and said "My father allowed me to chase what I want. What my heart wants--to go straight to the path of my dreams and I know love will push you even further if you love what you are doing with a purpose. I know my father is a hero but I want to serve them the best I can"
"Can you please translate it to more simpler words?"
"I want to be more than my father to cure his illness, that's what I want. And also, I want to raise my family up from poverty"
I was bunggled that time that I can't breath in awe. Her words of wisdom made me think of being a doctor also.
But, It made me think how fishermans can contribute to the industry's defection. Both profesionnalism were good. So if my friend somehow someday will be a doctor and her father is a fisherman, they will benefit both lives of many people.
That's my friend, and I love her.
Allah will enlighten your mind to love yourself and other people. That's him and all praises be to him.