i really have to finish the new chapter of the third book! i know! i just had good ideas for this one! Im sorry!
song for this chapter is Fall by Justin off the new Believe album! ITS MY FAVORITE! :)
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June 12th, (Same Night)
10:14 PM
I walked into the studio, my mind racing with all of these thoughts - questions.
She thought she loved me.
But she's scared.
And I don't blame her.
I sat my guitar down, pulling it out of the case and sat it off to the side.
I don't think I'd be recording tonight. Just writing, because maybe I could tell her this way.
She's been broken so many times, but she wants to be with me.
I love her. I know I do. Just seeing her cry like that, it killed me.
At least I left her smiling.
I picked up my notebook, frantically flipping for an empty page.
I need to be more organized...
'Now let me tell you a story about a girl and a boy,'
I scribbled down, looking over at my guitar again. I picked it up, fiddling around with the chords.
'Now let me tell you a story about a girl and a boy," I played.
I smiled, setting it back down and going back to my notebook.
My bestfriend...
I did lose her for a while...
I jotted down more, words coming and going like there was no tomorrow- until I had a finished song.
'He fell in love with his bestfriend
When she’s around he feels nothing but joy
But she was already broken
And it made her blind
But she could never believe that love would ever treat her right
But did you know that I loved you?
Or were you not aware?
You’re the smile on my face
And I ain’t going nowhere
I’m here to make you happy
I’m here to see you smile
I’ve been wanting to thins for a long long while
So what’s gonna make you fall in love
I know that you got your wall wrapped up all the way around your heart
You don’t have to be scared at all my love
But you can’t fly unless you let ya,
You can’t fly unless you let yourself fall
Well I can tell you’re afraid of what this might do
Cause we got such an amazing friendship and that you don’t wanna lose
Well I don’t wanna lose it either
I don’t think I can stay sitting around while you’re hurting babe
So take my hand
Well did you know you’re an angel who forgot how to fly?
Did you know that it breaks my heart every time to see you cry?
Cause I know that it pains if she’s gone every time you come over on the shoulder you cry on
And I hope by the time that I’m done with this song that I figure out
I will catch you if you fall
I will catch you if you fall
I will catch you if you fall
But if you spread your wings you can fly away with me
But you can’t fly unless you let ya
But you can’t fly unless you let ya
Self fall'
I smiled, sitting back.
Now the question was how to get her to fall in love with me - if she wasn't already.
Because I'm not great at this either, I had my own learning to do.
But tonight- telling me about her dad - she let me in.
Wow.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
June 14th
I scrambled around, ducking under amps and behind walls every time Lauren came into view. She couldn't see me - not yet.
But then she was on stage, running through her first song, and Angie walked over to me, handing me a mic.
"She has no idea." She laughed, smiling at me.
"Good." I smiled back, ducking under the stage.
I let out a breath actually nervous to see her again.
She thought I left for Europe...
But I'm right here.
I let out a laugh, then slapped my hand over my mouth.
Idiot.
There was a finally chord and an eruption of screams.
Alright, here we go. Show time.
I let out another breath, shifting my feet.
There was piano, then the acoustic guitar came in and I took a few steps closer to the doors.
I don't know why I'm nervous.
Maybe because I'm still trying to figure out how to get this girl to fall in love with me
I listened to her sweet voice, smiliing at the sound of it.
Because she's my girlfriend.
And I love her.
"Ready?" One of her crew members asked me.
I nodded, giving a thumbs up and the doors opened allowing me to walk out onto the stage.
There was more screaming, which I was just finally getting ready to get used to, then Laur turned around, looking back at me with an eyebrow raised, and smiled at me.
I sang, staring at her and rested my hand on her hip.
She lifted up her mic, joining me on the chorus and took a step back, turning to one side of the stge.
I went to the other, reaching down and touching fan's hands.
I didn't know if it worked or not. She looked happy to see me.
She looked over at me and I winked, walking back over to her.
I think it took everything I had not to kiss her.
I liked her red lips.
When our song was over she pulled me into her arms and I hugged her tightly back, smiling widely to myself.
"You didn't think I'd miss your first concert did you?" I whispered into her ear.
She pulled away and smiled at me, a faint blush on her cheeks.
"Give it up for Justin Bieber everybody!" She took my hand, holding it up and I laughed. "Maybe if you all scream really loud he can sing another song for us."
That sound was practically deafeing as she brought down our hands and I laughed, glancing at her from the side.
"What do you want me to sing?"
"Baby, baby, baby!" They chanted and she smiled.
"Ok. I can do that." I laughed.
"Go ahead Cameron." She smiled, looking back at him.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I walked away from the stage, hearing Lauren's voice calling it a night on stage.
I opened up the closet, walking in and keeping it cracked slightly.
"I have to change real quick." Lauren said from somewhere. I could barely make out the words.
I heard her light footsteps and I peeked through the crack in the door, seeing her walking towards me.
I opened the door, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her back in with me.
She let out a yelp and I put my finger over her lips, letting out a small laugh.
"Shh. It's just me." I whispered in her ear.
"God, why wouldn't you just come to my room like a normal person?!" She laughed, twisting to face me. "You scared me!"
"I'm sorry, but that wouldn't be any fun. Plus you have people out there. It's not like I would get to see you anyway."
"True," She paused looking around as she rested her hands on my shoudlers. "Isn't there a light in here somewhere?"
"Why?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.
"It's dark in here."
"You can see my face can't you?" I stepped closer, smirking at her.
"Well yeah."
"I guess it's not to dark then." I shrugged, pulling her closer to me. "Great job tonight by the way."
"You weren't so bad yourself." She smiled, then leaned forward and kissed me quickly.
"That's it? Really?" I pouted.
She laughed, sliding her arms all the around my neck and kissed me again.
i leaned her against the wall as I moved my hands on her lower back, kissing her back gently.
I let go with one hand, putting my hand on her cheek.
I pulled away first, not wanting her to think I was trying anything and rested my forehead against her's.
"Better?" She whispered, catching her breath.
"Yeah." I laughed.
"Let's go, before we get caught." She smiled and kissed my cheek.
"Ok." I sighed, taking her hand and opened the door slightly again, checking to make sure no one was in the hallway. "We're good."
I led her out, tightening my grip on her hand as she joined me at my side.
"So what happened to Europe?" She asked.
"I was never going to Europe. I just wanted to surprise you." I glanced at her with a smile.
"Then how long are you here?"
"All week. I'm working on Believe, I have some writing time in for myself and everything."
"Oh, then come to the bonfire tonight. I would have said something if I would have known you were going to be in LA," She paused, watching me as I thought and opened the door to her room. "Please? It'll be fun."
"Alright, I'll get to see you more."
"I came in the van, but they have to sneak me out in a different car, so..."
"I got driven too, by Kenny. I'm not allowed to drive myself to concerts or anything. You can just come with me."
"Ok, just let me change first."
"Aw, really?" I pouted, letting go of her hand.
She rolled her eyes and laughed at me.
"Yes, really."
She picked up her clothes, then turned back around and pointed her finger at me.
"Stay."
I nodded, smiling at her again before she disappeard.
I dialed Kenny's number as she changed, glancing in the mirror and fixed my hair.
"Hey, Kenny. Is it ok if Laur comes with us? She's having this bonfire thing and asked if I wanted to go."
"Yeah sure, that's fine."
"Alright, I'll meet you with Laur out there."
I hung up as Lauren walked back out, hanging the clothes she had been wearing before up on a hanger.
"Before you say anything, I didn't know you were coming. Mr. I'll be in Europe'"
"What? It doesn't matter to me." I shrugged as she walked over to me, putting my arm around her waist and kissed her cheek.
We left her room, walking back down the hall and backstage.
I saw Ms. Renee and I dropped my hand from Lauren's waist as she went to hug her.
"Honey I'm so proud of you! It was amazing!"
"Thanks Mom." Lauren smiled, pulling away after a few seconds.
"You heading off to the bonfire?"
"Yeah we are heading out now." She nodded.
"Alright. Nice to see you again Justin. Good luck on the album."
"Thanks Ms. Renee." I smiled at her as Lauren took my hand. "Nice seeing you too."
"It's on the beach right by the park you took me to." She said as we walked towards the exit.
"Ohh okay, I know where your talking about."
i saw her band piling into the van and one of them turned around.
"You coming?" He asked.
"Yeah I'm going with Justin, We'll meet you there."
Kenny pulled up and I opened the door, letting Lauren in first.
"Thanks." She smiled at me and I gave a small nod.
I got in the back next to her, putting my hand on top of her's as he pulled away.
"Wow." She whispered, looking at the girls gathered at the gate on the side, then sunk down.
'Lauren!' They called from outside.
"They can't see you. Tinted windows." I explained.
"Oh." She whispered, trying to hide her blush.
I laughed, squeezing her hand.
* * * * * *
Lauren sat beside me, sticking her marhmellow right into the flame and pulled it out.
"It's on fire." I laughed.
"I like it burnt." She smiled, blowing it out.
I laughed again, taking a bite of my smore and felt my cheeks heat up as the marshmellow stretched.
"That's embarrassing." I covered my mouth, trying to hide any evidence of the marshmellow.
"No it's not." She giggled nudging my arm and stuck her marshmellow in her mouth.
"You have a little-" I reached up, brushing her lip with my thumb.
"Now that's embarrasing."
"No biggie." I smiled and popped the rest of my smore in my mouth, watching Alfredo throw another log on the fire.
"Sorry, it was getting small. Plus we still have marshmallows left." He said, chucking one at the blonde boy.
"You've got to be kidding me." He laughed, picking up a marshmellow and throwing it back at Alfredo.
The brown haired boy joined in, along with Cierra, one of Laur's dancers. I knew her name.
I laughed at them, hearing two of the guys arguing.
"What are you going to try next, a curling iron?" Lexi asked him.
"It was all Lauren's idea!" Tyler pointed at Laur.
"You agreed to it." She held up her hands and smiled, laughing beside me.
She glanced at me and I smiled at her again.
"You wanna go for a walk?" I asked her.
"Sure." She nodded and we stood up, walking down to the water.
i found her hand in mine, slipping my fingers through and a cooed 'Aw' from behind us.
"Sorry." Lauren blushed, sending a scowl back the way it had come.
"Don't worry about it, you'll be getting it soon enough."
"Your probably right."
We walked quietly down the beach and I smiled down at the sand.
"So Jazzy and I are definitely coming to your concert in Toronto." I told her.
"Really? So I finally get to meet this precious little sister of yours." She looked at me.
"Well actually," I started, biting the inside of my lip. "I was kind of hoping you'd come and have dinner with me at Dad's, so you could meet everyone. If you want."
I glanced at her causiously, not sure of how she would react.
"I'd love that."
"Really?" My smile widened, feeling her other hand wrap around my arm.
"Yeah, really. If your little brother and sister are anything like you I'll be dying of laughter."
"Am I that funny?" I asked with a laugh.
"Yeah, you really are." She smiled, tilting her head to kiss my cheek.
"I'm flattered." I blinked my eyes.
She nudged my arm, laughing and looked out on the water.
"There is a beach by my house I drive to sometimes where I like to think to, besides the pond." She told me.
"I like the beach."
"This one is hidden, I accidently stumbled upon it one day."
"Sounds like a nice place for a date."
"Probably. We wouldn't be bothered there."
"Yeah." I scoffed. Everywhere we had gone we had been bothered.
"I never thanked you for the other day. For listening to me."
She stopped walking and I kept my eyes on her as I stopped myself.
The gentle breeze breeze blew loose a strand of her hair and I tucked it back.
"Anytime." I pulled her forward, kissing her forehead and smiled.
She let go of my hand and put her arms around me, resting her head on my chest.
"Everything ok?" I asked her.
"Yeah, I just can't believe I'm leaving."
"We'll be ok. I'm going to call you every night, and I'll see you when you come home. My home."
"Did you mean it? Really?" She said looking up.
"Mean what?"
"That you loved me."
"Of course I did. I wouldn't say that and not mean it. I'm not like that."
"I figured. I'm just - trying to be careful."
"I don't blame you. I would be too, but I'm not going to do that."
"I have a hard time trusting people Justin."
"But you trust me don't you?"
"Yes. I've known you long for a long time. You were always there."
"I always have been."
Her eyebrows frowned together as she watched me, then she stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against mine.
My arms tightened around her, lifting her off the ground slightly.
I had wanted this for so long.
And god her lips were soft.
"This isn't fair." She said pulling back. "You can't let me do this to you."
"Do what?"
"You love me, and I can't even say I love you back because I don't know."
"Lauren," I paused, brushing back her hair again. "How do you feel with me now? Right now?"
"Happy."
"And this," I said, letting go of her waist and taking her face into my hands. I kissed her, squeezing my eyes shut and felt her relax into me, kissing me back with the same amount of force. "What about that?"
She went to say something, but pulled me back by my jacket.
"I've never felt that way before. I mean, being kissed." She said.
"And that's a good thing right?" I asked, smiling at her.
"Yes." She nodded. "I just want to get it right."
I thought for a moment, moving my thumbs against her cheeks.
"Do you think I could steal you away for a few minutes after this is over?" I asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"I want you to hear something."
"Ok." She nodded, and smiled at me again.
* * * * * * * * * * * *