10
"That was a success!" Niyakap ako ni Miguel nang makarating kami sa backstage. Nahagilap ng mata ko si Shed na nakatitig sa amin nang panandalian bago patuloy na naglakad.
Umiwas ako sa pagkakayakap kay Miguel. "Thank you, Migs."
"Migs?" Humalakhak siya. "I like that."
Ngumisi ako.
"Let's have some drinks!" Pagyayaya ni Kurt sa banda. "This has been a toxic week. Life-saver 'tong si Thea. This calls for a celebration."
I again looked at Shed who was already walking in front of us. Umakbay sa akin si Miguel at iginiya ako para maglakad palabas ng hall. I did not protest. Pinabayaan ko lang siya hanggang sa makarating kami sa parking lot. There were fans waiting for us, holding banners and posters. They asked for a photo of us and they were all freaking out. I guess I'll never get used to this.
"Thank you!" Kumindat si Miguel at halos mahimatay na sila sa kilig. Umiling ako.
"Iba talaga tama mo sa mga babae, 'no?" Panunukso ko sa kan'ya nang nagpatuloy kami sa paglakad.
"Yeah, right." Humalakhak siya. "Pero hindi naman gumagana sa'yo."
Umirap ako. "Layuan mo nga ako."
Tumawa siya.
"Baka naman nagkakadevelopan na kayo ha." Pagpuna ni Kurt.
"Niloloko lang ako nitong si Miguel."
Natigilan ako nang patunugin ni Shed ang alarm ng kanyang sasakyan. Tila nawala lahat ng iniisip ko when I recognized the familiar sound, at lalong bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko nang makita ang kanyang heavy-tinted FJ Cruiser. Pakiramdam ko tumigil ang mundo ko, it all came back to me.
===
"What do you think?" Ngumisi si Shed habang pinapakita sakin ang matte maroon FJ Cruiser na nasa harap namin. He's so ecstatic about buying this at kitang kita iyon sa mga mata niya.
"Wow, Shed. I don't know what to say." And I honestly didn't. Sobrang proud ko lang para sa kan'ya. He's earned enough money to buy something for himself and I know how much he wants this.
"Gusto mo ba?" He looked at me, concerned.
"Oo naman! You deserve this, Shed." Niyakap ko siya. "I'm so proud of you."
Inakbayan niya ako at hinalikan sa pisngi. "I'm so excited to see the world, Thea, to see the world with you."
Ngumiti ako. And I'm also so excited to be with him along the way.
===
"Thea?" Boses ni Miguel.
I blinked my eyes. I was too fixated on the car and all the memories it brought me. Sumakay na sina Kurt sa sasakyan ni Shed and he was also looking back at me.
"You ok? Doon na lang tayo sa sasakyan ko," Ani Miguel. Nilabas niya ang sariling susi at pinatunog rin ang pulang BMW na nakapark sa tabi lang ng sasakyan ni Shed. His car screams Miguel's personality - flashy yet beautiful.
Tumango ako at tinanggal ang tingin ko sa sasakyan ni Shed. Naglakad ako patungo sa sasakyan ni Miguel as he opened the door for me.
I sighed once I entered the car. I shouldn't space out like that. I'm so stupid.
Ngumiti si Miguel nang makapasok sa sasakyan. Pinanuod ko ang FJ Cruiser na umandar until only me and Miguel were left there.
"You can say no," Inayos ni Miguel ang seatbelt niya and connected his phone on his car. "Gusto mo ba ihatid na kita?"
"No, Miguel. Ano ka ba, I'm fine." Ngumiti ako. "This is our night, right? We should enjoy this."
Ginulo ni Miguel ang buhok ko. I pouted. Inayos ko na rin ang seatbelt ko habang nagsimula si Miguel magpatakbo ng sasakyan. Somebody that I used to know started playing in his car. We found ourselves on the road, singing our hearts out.
For a while, nawala lahat ng iniisip ko, nawala ang kaba ko, and I was being myself again. We stopped by a known high-end bar. I raised my brow upon seeing the line outside, but Miguel and I just went past the crowd. All of them turned their heads to look at us, some even whispering. Agad naman kaming pinapasok ng guard. This is insane. I've never had access to these kind of things.
Pagpasok namin ay sinalubong kami ng lakas ng tunog ng musika, it was still early but the crowd was already going wild. Miguel guided me towards a stairs and a label that says VIP. We went to the corner at doon ay nakita ko na sina Kurt, Felix, Oliver at Shed na nakaupo sa pabilog na sofa. For a moment, I felt like my heart stopped beating as I was searching the crowd for Shed's girlfriend. Even the thought of it makes me feel nauseous. I sighed in relief nang mapagtanto na hindi namin siya kasama rito.
Umupo ako sa tabi ni Miguel and watched the dance floor from above. Natatakot ako na kapag tumingin ako ay makita ko muli si Shed and his indifference towards me.
After a while, a waiter with a tray of cocktails and beer stopped by to serve our drinks.
"To Thea, for finally becoming a band member." Miguel lifted his drink. We all clinked our glasses.
"Anong pakiramdam, Thea? Some even dub you as one-day superstar!" Halakhak ni Felix.
"Grabe, hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala. Hindi pa rin 'to sakin nagsisink in sa totoo lang. Hindi ko nga alam kung tatanggapin ako ng fans niyo."
"They'll be alright, Thei. Some fans can be aggressive pero wala naman na silang magagawa. Besides, you're an amazing singer." Kumindat si Miguel.
Tumawa ako. "Kanina mo pa ako binobola, Migs."
"Totoo naman, 'diba Shed?"
Nawala ang ngiti sa labi ko. The thing about Miguel, he loves awkward moments! Napatitig ako kay Shed, and I also wanted to know what he has to say. Kanina pa siya tahimik. Pero tumango lang siya, showing little interest.
"C'mon pre, back me up here." Pabirong sinuntok ni Miguel ang braso ni Shed. Kumuha siya ng beer at matagal na lumagok doon. Miguel watched him in dismay.
"Wala kang kwentang kaibigan," He said jokingly.
Hawak ni Shed ang beer sa isang kamay habang hawak niya naman ang phone sa kabila. He was looking at it intently as if waiting for something.
The band continued their chit-chats. Doon ko napag-alaman na girlfriend na pala ni Oliver si Monica, the girl he was giving love letters noong kolehiyo pa kami. I felt at ease talking to these people, parang naibalik ako sa panahong ang problema ko lang ay maka-graduate and how to be the number one supporter of the band.
"The night is young," Tumayo si Felix. "We better get down there."
Tinuro niya ang dance floor with all the crowd jumping to the beat of the music. Tumayo si Oliver at Kurt and they looked at me expectantly.
Umiling ako. This isn't my thing.
"Oh, c'mon, Thea. This is your night! You should party" Sigaw ni Kurt sa kabila ng maingay na musika.
Ngumiti lang ako. "Next time, promise! Pagod na talaga ako ngayon, eh."
He just shrugged and looked at Miguel.
Shit. When I looked at Miguel's direction, I saw Shed. He was still looking at his phone na pamaya-maya ay tumutunog, hinting there was a text message. He looked occupied. Knowing him, hindi niya rin gugustuhin sumama.
"Sasamahan ko na lang muna rito si Thea." Miguel said. Relief flooded over me. Tinapik ni Miguel si Shed at tamad siyang lumingon kina Oliver. As expected, he shook his head and drank his beer.
The three went on their way down to the dance floor. Kumuha muli ako ng cocktail when Miguel caught my hand.
"Kaya mo pa ba? You look red."
Tumango ako. He let go of my hand and I drank from my glass. Lumingon ako sa gawi kung saan naglakad sina Oliver. Their sight was overwhelmed by people, all of them dancing.
Napalingon ako nang marinig ko ang cellphone ni Miguel na tumunog. Kinagat ko ang labi ko. Kinuha niya ito mula sa bulsa at nagbuntong hininga.
"I need to pick this, I'll be back." Paalam niya sa akin.
Tumango ako kahit labag sa loob ko. Bumalik ang mabilis na tibok ng puso ko. I looked at him excusing himself from the crowd, trying to look for a quiet spot to answer his phone. Nagawi muli ang tingin ko kay Shed. He was looking at a distance while the tip of his bottled beer was touching his lips.
Kinuha ko ang phone ko and tried to concentrate on it. Wala akong balak kausapin siya. Just when I was about to stand up and excuse myself to the powder room, he suddenly talked.
"Natapos mo na pala."
Ang kaninang mabilis na tibok ng puso ko ay parang tumigil at the sound of his voice. I looked at him hesitantly.
"Ha?" lang ang tanging lumabas mula sa bibig ko.
"Yung kanta. I saw your viral video, it was the song we composed."
Shit.
"Ah, yeah..." Pinilit kong wag mautal. "Sorry, hindi ko naman alam na mag-viviral. Sana binigyan kita ng credits."
Uminom muli siya sa kanyang bote, his adam's apple slowly moving while gulping. "No worries."
Kinagat ko ang labi ko at bumagsak ang tingin ko sa phone na hawak niya. His wallpaper was the same girl from the studio, Renee. She was kissing him on his cheeks while he was smiling for the camera. Para akong nawalan ng hininga sa nakikita, and stupid me, mukhang napansin niya kaya pinindot niya ang lock ng phone to turn it off.
"Y-your girlfriend... She's pretty." Muli kong tingin sa kanya, trying not to break the gaze, because I know once I do, malalaman niya ang nararamdaman ko.
Stupid... Stupid! I shouldn't have said that.
Ibinulsa niya ang kanyang cellphone. "Thanks." Aniya.