Daryl's POV
I'd never put much trust in prayer before, but I prayed harder that evening than I'd ever prayed for anything in my life... even harder than I'd prayed when Sophia went missing. I begged God and pleaded with him not to take Delilah from me and our children. I was honest enough to admit to him that after everything that had happened in my life, I still wasn't so convinced that he even existed.
I was conscious of Rick and Michonne coming in and out to check on us. They brought messages from many of the community members letting us know that they were thinking of us and praying for our family. Carol sent some food over for us along with a message to let us know that she was watching the kids and not to worry.
Roe was starting to look a bit pale and tired, and Dr. Carson had refused to allow him to donate more blood after the first three bags had been taken and transfused into Delilah. "No. We need to just wait and see how things go at this point. If we need more tomorrow I'll consider it."
Delilah faded in and back out of consciousness a couple of times. Dr. Carson tried to reassure me that in addition to the blood loss she was also exhausted from birthing two babies. He was cautiously optimistic because her bleeding had slowed significantly, and her vital signs showed that she seemed to be responding to the transfusions. He continued to keep a close eye on her blood loss.
Dr. Carson was also concerned that the blood and fluid loss could have a negative effect on Delilah's milk supply. He was careful to make certain that we helped the babies nurse every two to three hours throughout the night. We took turns sleeping in shifts on the sofa, but even when it was my turn I wasn't able to sleep much.
Just as the sun was beginning to peek through the treetops the next morning, Delilah opened her eyes as I brought the babies to her. "Well hey there Doc! It's good to see those beautiful eyes again. You had us all worried love."
She looked around, slightly confused as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "How long was I asleep? What exactly happened? Where is everyone? What happened ta you? You look like hell!"
Somehow she always managed to bring a smile to my face, even in the worst times. "That's my girl! Now I know you're gonna be ok. You lost a lot of blood and Carson had to go back in and scrape out some pieces of afterbirth that got left inside. They transfused some a Roe's blood into ya. You've been mostly out all night long, but Carson's had us make sure that the babies nursed every couple a hours. They're just ready ta eat again, are ya feelin' up ta feedin' 'em?"
Delilah nodded and worked on getting herself into a more upright position. She pulled pillows around herself in the bed and reached for the babies. I helped her settle them in and get them latched on. I watched her carefully. She was still pale, but not nearly as pale as she had been the night before. She glanced up out of the corner of her eye. "Guess I gave ya a pretty good scare, huh? How ya holdin' up darlin'?"
I shrugged. "I'm a'ight I reckon. Ya did have me more scared than I can remember bein' ever in my life. Didn't get much sleep. But that's ok. I'll catch a nap later. Right now I'm just happy ta see ya lookin' more alive than last night."
She leaned her head back and relaxed into the pillows as the babies nursed. "I'm so sorry darlin'. I hate to have caused y'all so much worry."
I ran my fingers lightly through her hair and placed a kiss on her forehead. "It's not your fault love. There wasn't nuthin' you coulda done ta avoid it. The important thing is that ya did it, and all y'all are safe and healthy. You're still here with us."
Delilah turned her head and pushed her forehead into my chest. "Daryl, I was so scared darlin'. I was so afraid that I was gonna leave ya. I didn't think I was gonna have the strength ta make it through."
I pulled her face back and kissed away the tears that were rolling down her face. "Shhh now love. It's all ok now. You're safe. The babies are safe. I ain't lettin' ya go nowhere love. It's ok."
She took a deep shuddering breath and nodded slightly. "I love you so much Daryl Dixon. You and our family are my whole world."
I kissed her mouth softly and rested my forehead on hers. "And you know I love ya right back even more Doc."
Jaxon began to stir and fuss, and I took him to burp and change his diaper while Delilah finished feeding Dacia. Carol came into the infirmary with Mercy and Bowyn following behind her. "They just both wanted so badly to see their mama and the new babies. I told them we'd come by and see how Delilah was feeling this morning... if she's feeling up to visitors." she whispered from the door.
Delilah waved them in and I helped get them settled into the bed beside their mama. They both oohed and awed over the new babies, but just wanted to snuggle with Delilah too. Carol and I took the babies for a few minutes to give her some time with the children. "You comin' home soon Mama? We miss ya!" Mercy asked
Delilah smiled and nodded. "Yes sweet girl. As soon as Dr. Carson says it's ok. I missed y'all too." They seemed satisfied with that information. Carol promised that if we didn't get to come home by lunch time that she would bring them back for another visit.
Roe, Jesus, and Max came back by that morning to see how things were going. When Dr. Carson gave his ok for us to go home, they helped us arrange the transfer back to the house. Going home that day felt like one of the biggest accomplishments in our lives. I knew how close I'd come to losing my wife, and taking my healthy family home felt like a bigger victory than any other battle we'd ever fought.
6 Weeks Later
Delilah's POV
My recovery from the birth of the twins had been much more uneventful than I had anticipated. The blood loss had left me feeling quite tired for a few weeks, but that was probably the worst of the adjustment. I had nursed Bowyn and Maeve at the same time, so nursing two babies had become rather routine.
I had the appetite of a small village, but Daryl worried over the fact that I wasn't gaining any weight despite the huge amount of food I was eating. I knew he remembered the problems I'd had keeping weight on when I was nursing Bowyn and Maeve. He took some comfort in the fact that Dr. Carson didn't seem to be worried at all, and was actually quite satisfied with the growth of the babies.
Dr. Carson had been keeping an extra close eye on Dacia. He had expressed some concerns regarding her delivery and resuscitation, and the possible long term neurological issues because she had been deprived of oxygen for several minutes. So far there were no signs of any permanent damage. She had been smaller than Jax since the beginning, but she was staying right on her growth curve. Dacia also seemed to be just as bright and alert as her brother, and also was showing some signs of being more advanced. She'd already started smiling and making cooing noises, and she seemed to be always closely watching her older siblings.
Dr. Carson had returned to Hilltop, leaving Gavin in charge of our infirmary while I was on maternity leave. He'd been coming back once a week to check on us. Today he was returning for my 6 week check up. He'd asked for Daryl to be present also as there was something he'd said he specifically wanted to discuss with us both.
He finished the physical exam fairly quickly. "Well, pretty much as I expected. You've recovered beautifully from the delivery Delilah. Your color has even improved, and I'm pretty certain you've avoided any serious anemia issues with the help of the transfusions from your brother. I would like it if you'd agree to taking it easy for a few more weeks. If I can't talk you into extending your maternity leave for a few more weeks, I'd at least like to see you back only part-time for a few more weeks. I don't want to see you overtaxing yourself unnecessarily. Gavin has been doing a great job so far, and he knows how to reach you quickly if he needs your help."
Delilah listened carefully to what Dr. Carson said. "Actually... I've been givin' a lot of thought ta cuttin' back on some a my duties. Our children are only gonna be children for a few years. Before we know it, they'll be Max's age. I wanna enjoy them as much as possible now. I'd like ta bring in another apprentice or two ta begin trainin'. They could start by learnin' how ta take over the gardens and prepare the compounded medications we grow. But you said you wanted ta talk ta both a us about somethin'. It's gotta be about more than me cuttin' back my hours."
Dr. Carson nodded. "I've been giving it a lot of thought, and I'd like to propose something that no one has considered an option for a while. I don't want you to answer today, but I'd like you both to think about it and discuss it. Daryl, I'd like to offer you a vasectomy. It's a relatively simple office based procedure with low risk for complications. It would certainly be a lot less risky than Delilah becoming pregnant again. I know in the past you've counted on breastfeeding to delay conception Delilah, and I think we've probably got a couple of months before you'll really have to worry about preventing pregnancy while you're nursing the twins. But I wanted to go ahead and put it on the table as an option for you to begin talking about."
Daryl had started looking slightly squeamish as soon as the word 'vasectomy' left Dr. Carson's lips, but didn't respond immediately. "Wow! I hadn't even considered that as a possibility. It is very reliable birth control Daryl. We wouldn't have to worry at all about gettin' pregnant again."
Daryl shifted his weight nervously from one leg to the other and chewed on his thumbnail. "But... you're talkin' about cuttin'... on my... I just don't... I mean..."
Dr. Carson placed a hand on Daryl's shoulder. "I understand your hesitancy Daryl. There is a way of doing the procedure through a small puncture. It doesn't even require an actual incision. You wouldn't even need stitches afterward. Just think it over. For Delilah's sake." He turned to me. "Now I know that in the past you've had difficulties conceiving while you were breastfeeding. So we know in your case it does seem to offer some protection from pregnancy. It would stand to reason that for the first few months you should be fairly safe, especially since you're nursing twins. But I wouldn't push your luck much beyond that. And there would also be some time following the procedure that there could still be some sperm present in the semen..."
Daryl had begun to shift uncomfortably again. I nodded my head. "Ok. Thanks for the information. We'll definitely talk it over and let ya know what we decide soon. Daryl, do you have any questions?"
He shrugged. "So this uh... what you're sayin' is... Delilah's all healed up, and we can... go back to..."
Dr. Carson suppressed a chuckle. "Yes Daryl. Delilah is completely recovered physically from the birth of the twins. She may return to any of the activities she previously enjoyed as long as she feels up to it. I suspect that you've already begun to return to an exercise regimen of some type?"
I smiled slightly and shrugged one shoulder. "Well, its only a little Tai Chi for balance and some Yin Yoga for stretchin'. Nothin' strenuous. But I would like ta return to sparrin' with Jesus and maybe get in a little cardio too."
Daryl shook his head and scowled. "Ain't like ya need ta lose any more weight woman!"
Dr. Carson nodded. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to agree with Daryl on this one Delilah. No cardio until you've put back on some weight. It might be more helpful for you to focus on weight lifting and muscle building activities while you're breastfeeding."
I nodded. "Ok y'all. No cardio. But I am gonna start some gentle sparrin' with Jesus again. I need ta work on rebuildin' my stamina."
Dr. Carson smiled, satisfied with my easy agreement. He said his goodbyes and we all left the infirmary. As Daryl and I walked back home hand in hand I brought up Dr. Carson's offer again. "So, what do ya really think about the idea of havin' the vasectomy Daryl?"
He shrugged one shoulder and made an "I don't know" sound.
I nudged his arm with my shoulder. "Buggin' ya some, huh? Is it more that just the idea of a doctor pokin' around in such a sensitive area?"
Daryl stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and turned to face me. "Yeah. It is. We really haven't taken the time ta talk 'bout this at all. Are you sure that we're done addin' to our family? I mean, I know that your pregnancies have been rough, but you've managed ta get through 'em and make it look a damn sight easier than it really is. I just see what a strong woman ya are, and what an incredible mama ya are, and I have ta wonder if we're really done? What if we decide in six months or so that we really do want just one more? What if I get the vasectomy and then we regret it later?"
This much conversation flooding out of my husband all at once took me a little by surprise, but I was more surprised by the meaning of his words. "Daryl, do you remember what you felt six weeks ago when the twins were born and you thought you were losin' me? I want ya ta think back ta that night and ask yourself if ya ever wanna feel that way again. What happens if one more pregnancy is just pushin' our luck too far? Or God forbid, what if we had twins again? I'm not so sure you've thought this through."
Daryl nodded. "Yeah. I get it. You're right. I don't wanna ever feel like I might lose ya again. I just wanted ta make sure that we'd both thought through all a this before we make a permanent decision."
We turned and started walking toward home again. "I appreciate that darlin'. I do. But I also am scared half ta death ta do anything that might take either one a us away from our family before we're old and gray."
Daryl snickered. "Like you're anywhere near old and gray Doc. You're even hotter now than ya were the first night I laid eyes on ya."
It was my turn to laugh. "Daryl Dixon, flattery will get you everywhere! But you know that Dr. Carson just cleared us for sex for the first time in six weeks. You're pretty much guaranteed to get lucky tonight... even without the flattery."
Daryl chuckled as we walked up the stairs to our home. "Yeah, I know that. Didn't say it ta get lucky. Said it cuz it's true. My ol' lady is one hot mama!"
Daryl put his hand on my ass and gave it a squeeze as I walked through the door he was holding open for me. I giggled as we walked into the living room where Carol and Roe were jiggling the twins to calm them. We had clearly returned just in time. "Oh thank goodness you're back! I was just about to send Roe out to get you. These two don't mess around a bit when they wake up hungry!"
I sat down on the sofa and pulled pillows around me. Carol and Roe handed me the babies one at a time so I could latch them on. "I swear, most days they make me feel like they see me as their own dairy farm! Jaxon is even more vigorous than Bowyn was."
Mercy and Bowyn had just come up from the basement with Max behind them. Even at two years younger than Mercy, Bowyn was already almost as tall as his older sister. He looked like a miniature Daryl, but it was looking as if he would be at least as big as his Uncle Roe. They were all laughing as they entered the room. "Mama. Max wants us ta spend the night with him tonight. May we go? Please!" Mercy begged.
I smiled at her and looked at Max to make certain his sister wasn't inviting herself without his consent. He nodded. "Yep. Anabelle and I would love it if they'd both come and spend some time at our place tonight and tomorrow."
I nodded. "Yes, of course you can. As long as you both promise ta mind Max and Anabelle both, and no more tricks like last time y'all stayed over, right Bow?"
Bowyn looked down and shuffled his feet. "Yes ma'am." The last time they had an overnight at Max and Anabelle's house Bowyn had snuck his favorite frog along with him. Somehow the frog ended up in the toilet bowl, and Anabelle was the unfortunate soul that found him.
There were several stifled snickers from around the room as the adults present remembered Max's retelling of the story. It seemed that Anabelle's talent for singing extended to talent for screeching quite loudly when she was surprised by a frog popping up out of the toilet just before she sat down. I glared at Daryl who was having the hardest time in not laughing outright. He composed himself long enough to manage, "A'ight then. Y'all run along upstairs and let ya Auntie Carol help ya pack a bag for overnight."
Carol put an arm around each of her favorite miscreants. "C'mon you two. Let's see what kind of fun things we can pack for you."
I rolled my eyes as they headed upstairs and chuckles busted out of Roe, Daryl, and Max. "Y'all are gonna encourage that boy ta be the biggest troublemaker in town. It's bad enough that he's already terrorized some of the little girls with a string of dead squirrels!"
This only made them all laugh harder. I handed off a baby to Daryl and one to Roe. "Here y'all can burp these two and change them. I'm gonna see if I can go help Carol. Try really hard not ta turn them into delinquents before I get back!"
As I walked toward the stairs I overheard Roe mumble to Daryl and Max, "She gives us way too much credit. We'd need at least a full hour for that."
I called back over my shoulder, "I can still hear you, Asshat."
Daryl and Max laughed at the exchange. "Think you'll ever learn man?" Daryl asked.
Roe chuckled as he answered. "Nope. Not a chance."