Puck
I can see gears turning in Sean's mind. His eyes focus on nothing and everything. He seems worlds away as we walk side by side to my family home, Dove's lead in my hands and the bike in his. Now that it is just Finn and me at home, we both make an effort to have dinner together most days. Some days Sean joins us as well; three people at a table that once seated five. I find that I don't mind quite as much I did before the races; the empty seats don't weigh so heavily on my soul.
By the time we get there Sean still hasn't spoken. He simply walks the bike to the side of the yard and leans it against the fence. Now that it has snowed we will start keeping the bikes in the shed so they don't rust. I don't mention this to Sean though, I only invite him to stay for dinner. He looks toward the house and then toward the road, loosely in the direction of his house. He turns back to me and nods. Sean follows silently behind me as I lead Dove to her lean-to. Dove settles in and eats some of her expensive feed. I don't know what would happen if I couldn't afford it anymore, she has quickly become spoiled now that we have more money coming in.
Gabe has found a decent job working in a hotel on the mainland. He sends us a bit of money and a letter every few weeks letting us know how he is getting on. I think I miss him less now than I did before the races, even though he is farther away. We feel closer now than we've been since our parents' death. I think this is because we understand each other better.
Sean and I head into the house to find Finn tinkering in the kitchen, the table covered in gadgets and gears and all the other whatnots that Finn likes to collect. I see oil spots on the table and turn to glare at him. "Oi! What have I told you about doing that at the table?! Those grease stains are nearly impossible to get out."
Finn ignores me and continues doing whatever it is he does. Sean and I shuffle further into the house and take off our boots and jackets. It's only after Finn notices that I'm not alone he looks up from his latest project. "Hello Sean."
"Hello Finn," Sean replies.
"Hello Sean? I'm only your sister." Finn continues to ignore me and invites Sean to sit down. I am slightly baffled by how chummy they've become without my realizing it. I'm not sure whether to be proud or terrified. I decide that it is a good thing that they are getting along, even if it is currently working against me. Sean pulls out the chair across from Finn and sits down.
"What's for dinner?" Are the first words Finn directs my way.
"Whatever you plan on cooking," I reply indignantly. I go to work all day while he muddles around and I'm expected to make dinner. Not even a 'hello Puck' from that ungrateful imp. Unfortunately my words lose their sting, as I am walking towards the refrigerator as I say this. There is a chicken in the refrigerator, as well as some beets and potatoes in the pantry. It still gives me a thrill to see something other than beans in the pantry. I take a moment to remember another time when Sean was over and there was a chicken to be eaten. The moment passes and I grab the food to start dinner.
Finn has gone back to his puttering and Sean is staring at a knot in the kitchen table, tracing it absently. I wonder what he is thinking. When supper is done and Finn has taken his project into the other room, Sean and I stand at the sink washing dishes. All at once my frustration and curiosity overcome my patience and understanding of his silence.
"What's wrong Sean?" I ask.
He looks up from the dish he is washing. Not at me, but out the window. I wait a moment for him to gather his thoughts into a cohesive sentence.
"What about Corr? And Finndebar? There is a reason I didn't live in my father's house while working for Malvern. It's quite a ways away."
I consider his words and try to formulate an answer. I doubt travelling farther is his only issue with the situation. He would hate to leave Corr alone for so long. I can only think of a few solutions to his problems and none of them is particularly favourable.
Sean sits down at the table with his head in his hands. He already knows what limited options he has as well as I do, but now he must choose the lesser of evils. He looks mentally exhausted.
"Do you want to stay here tonight?" I ask. Sean has never stayed here overnight before, but I don't envy him the trip home. He can tend to the horses in the morning. He deliberates a moment before responding.
"Would Finn mind?" A derisive snort is the only answer I give him.
*****
When I wake up the next morning Sean is still asleep beside me. I move to get ready for work and Sean starts to wake. "Good Morning Sean."
"Good morning Kate." Sean is one of the few people who call me Kate. He calls me Puck as well. I think he understands that both of them are my names. He tends to call me Kate when he's feeling affectionate, unlike my brothers. When they call me Kate I'm usually being scolded by one of them.
Sean remains laying on his back in bed, staring at the ceiling without really seeing it.
"You could return to living at the Malvern yard and take Corr with you," I suggest.
"What about Finndebar?" I ponder this for a second.
" She could stay here. It would be a tight fit, but she wouldn't be so far away. She and Dove already get along."
Sean sighs. I know he doesn't want to return completely to the Malvern yard, because that would feel like defeat, but he doesn't exactly have any better options.
"I'll think about it," he replies. He knows this is probably the best course of action. He also knows this means asking Mr Malvern for his tiny flat back as well as a stall for Corr. This isn't much of an improvement over the long commute, but Corr is healing nicely and will need more attention soon; if Sean is always going back and forth he won't have as much time to devote to him.