I was flooded with sleep and about to drift off to slumberland, when someone knocked lightly. I heard the sound of the knob and the door opened and someone stepped in. I was still lying on the same spot without making a move.
"Can I come in?" It was Jason.
"You're already in! So there's no need to ask for my permission." I said. He sniggered and then pulled himself together perhaps to sound stern.
"I've been looking all over for you." He said and I noted the sadness in his voice.
"Come here." I said and patted the bed for him to come lay beside me. He did.
I searched for his hand and when I found it, I threaded it through mine. I guess everyone has their share of insecurities. I guess if I were in Jason's shoes, I would react the same way. I don't even know how many girls have stared and still stare at him when he's away from me. Scratch that, I don't want to imagine how many girls do that. Perhaps, if I could see and notice their stares or flirtatious behavior, my nostrils would flare with jealousy and anger that I would burst in rage. So his actions were understandable.
Lucidly.
"George and I were in my room the whole time. He had something to say to me and Ana was about to freak out because we were noisy so I asked him to come here." I said at long last.
"Okay." He said.
I was actually expecting him to rant a little about George and I being together but I was surprised by his short reply.
"Just okay? You aren't going to say more?" I inquired, still stunned.
"Yeah. What else were you expecting me to say?" He enquired as well.
"For starters, I thought you might be jealous and act weird. I just didn't expect you to say ‘okay’." I retorted and then he exhaled slowly, letting my words sink in.
"I admit I was jealous initially but I just thought about it while watching the movie downstairs. I trust my friends and I trust you too, more than you can ever imagine. I know he needed your advice so there's nothing wrong with you both being together." He expounded.
"Thank you for trusting me." I replied genuinely and squeezed his hand.
"I'm clearly surprised myself. George never really talks about his problems to others so he must really see something in you that urged him to open up ." He said again.
"He wants to propose to Valerie and he needed my advice on romance." I didn't feel the need to hide it from him and therefore I explained everything, including my perspective on romance and the whole discussion between George and I.
"You sure are a hopeless romantic." Jason said after I was done with the explanation.
"Hell yeah! I sure am." I concurred. We laid silently after that and my thoughts wandered back to my series of imaginations on the girls who probably ogled Jason in my presence and absence. It was saddening.
"Do they stare at you?" I asked out of the blue.
"I don't understand. Who are you referring to?" He asked in return, completely puzzled.
"Girls. Do they, you know, stare at you when you walk by, at the Grocery store, Cinema, at school, England and everywhere else?" I explained.
"Sure lots of them stare at me. At the mall, especially at school. I've actually gone out with so many girls, I can't count." He answered.
"Oh!" I stated.
His reply was way out of what I thought he'd say. I felt a burning sensation in my heart, mind and soul. What I felt, definitely had a name.
It was jealousy.
I was so jealous of the fact that before me, he had been with so many women, girls, ladies, senõritas, mademoiselles, senhoritas, madame, Fräulein, signorinas and every other language you can translate 'lady' to.
I felt crushed and depressed. I couldn't bear to imagine his relationships with them.
Did they make him happy?
Now I undoubtedly understood Jason's jealousy, when I was with other guys. It was a feeling that was threatening to eat me up. But I had to subdue it. I had to believe that no matter how many women he'd been with, I was definitely the best.
"Holy shit! I was just kidding." Jason snapped me back to reality.
"But I thought you said..." he didn't let me finish.
"I was just kidding." He repeated.
"Since I met you, even as a kid, I haven't thought about anyone else not to talk about being with them. I lost you and completely felt a void, ache, emptiness that could never be filled by anyone else. Although I hooked up with some teenage girls in highschool, you left a mark in me that would never be replaced by any other woman." He said and my heart melted. I couldn't breathe. His words tumbled my world. I couldn't think straight. I was completely speechless
"And as for the question about girls staring at me, I honestly don't know the answer to that. You wanna know why?" he asked and I nodded. "It's because I see no one else but you, always. I have no idea if anyone is attracted to me, if they stare endlessly, if they want me to date them. I don't know and I don't freaking care. All I care about is the girl lying beside me to keep staring at me. And since she can't do that, then I believe I will have to be the one staring at her forever because she means the world to me." He ended his speech and I almost died of blushing. I was sure if I did die at the moment, my epitaph would be ‘Here lies the girl who died of excessive blushing. Her cheeks will forever remain rosy red.’
"I'm completely stunned and speechless." I finally spoke but ironically couldn't be expressive.
"You were totally jealous, weren't you?" He asked and there was a teasing tone to his question.
"I was totally and utterly jealous." I answered truthfully.
He only laughed and said "That's how I feel every time. When you're out with me, I see some douche bags staring at you with lust in their eyes and I always feel like walking up to them and beating the crap out of them. It's torture."
"Guys stare at me?" I couldn't help but ask.
"They do, a lot actually. Wait, you don't know?" he was perplexed, I could tell.
"How would I know? I'm blind, duh! Moreover, I've always felt like I'm not good or beautiful enough for guys to look at me." I said sheepishly.
"My God! Cassiopeia, you should see yourself. You are the definition of beautiful. You've turned out to be the mature and more beautiful version of the child I knew. I'm so glad you're mine." He said.
The next action that took place was a blur. But the next thing I knew, I was turned to him, he wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me. I twined my arms around his neck and kissed him back. It felt amazingly good to hold him again, to feel him, to smell him.
He kissed me again and again, pressing his tongue in to my mouth, my fingers twined with his hair, her body arch inward to fit itself to his and his arms tightened about my waist.
It was pure bliss, ecstasy and completely mind blowing.
We pulled apart about six minutes later, give or take. Not that I was counting anyway. But we were still wrapped around each other.
"We should probably go downstairs. I'm sure they must be looking for us." he said but I didn't want to go. I wanted to stay here and fall asleep in his arms.
"No let's stay please." I begged.
"You know if we we stay here, we could do something I'm sure neither of us is ready for." He stated matter of fact.
"I know but I don't want to go downstairs. I want to stay here, with you. Come, let's lie down properly." He still seemed a little hesitant as we got out of bed to rearrange it before we got under the covers.
"By the way, Tess placed your things in my closet. Your toothbrush, paste and clothes are in there if you need anything." I said, even though I knew he probably wasn't going to make use of them tonight.
When we were finally comfortable, I realised that sleep was returning and I welcomed it.
"And Jason?" I called for his attention.
"Yeah?" he replied behind me, his minty breath tickling my neck.
"Meeting you was the best surprise ever. I'm glad to have you as my boyfriend." I finally said. He kissed my hair and held me close before I was eventually
immersed in sleep.
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Love,
Osaro.