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Erik Jonasson - Like A Funeral
"I know, it's just a funeral
To say goodbye again
For one last time
You were holding my hands
For one last time."
IT WAS INCREDIBLY QUIET THAT MORNING IN THE GILBERT HOUSE. Bright light came through the window as Elena heard a sound of church bells, sirens and yard work from afar. She finally opened her eyes with a gasp and woke up.
The Gilbert girl slowly sat up in bed, sounds not letting her think properly as she saw Stefan sitting on the end of her bed, watching her. Elena glanced at him in confusion. She was dead, that she remembered. "Stefan?" her voice came out as hoarse and scared.
"Hey, I'm right here," the youngest Salvatore touched her leg in comforting manner as Elena felt empty inside and yet so full of emotions. "You've been in and out for hours."
"Wh-what happened?" she questioned before looking down at her hand to see that Holden's gift for her 18th birthday wasn't on her wrist normally. That made her panic a little because she promised herself to never take that off. Why was she even thinking about Holden and the need to hug and kiss him so much? Why was she thinking about Damon at all?
Stefan paused. "You were in an accident."
Elena widened her eyes as images of past started flowing in. "Oh my God. Matt is he...?"
Holden then sighed deeply from his spot at the window so Elena snapped her head at her savior, who just needed one more minute to save her. But Elena chose herself to die. To let water flow and die in his hands. "He's alive," Holden commented dully as Elena and Stefan both glanced at him. "Ask the hero Stefan Salvatore."
Stefan looked down, feeling guilty so Elena glanced back at him, confusion still surrounding her. "He's fine."
Elena glanced back at Holden, who didn't look back at her. As if he was scared to look her in the eye, like she wasn't Elena anymore. "You saved me," she then mused and finally Holden's and hers eyes met.
It held pain. Holden's eyes. And then he shook his head. "I didn't."
"When Jeremy brought you to the hospital before all this happened, your injuries were worse than anyone knew," Stefan told the girl, ready to tell her the news, so hurtful. "Meredith Fell made a choice, she used Damon's blood to heal you."
Holden then walked away from the window and stood next to her bed. "And then Rebekah ran Matt's truck off the road... You had vampire blood in your system, Elena. You're a..."
He couldn't finish that sentence. He saw how Elena's eyes widened and how much she truly wanted to die that time. "Oh my God. Does- does that mean that I - am I dead?" Elena questioned her eyes driving from one brother to another. Neither of them said anything so she started to panic even more. "No, no, no, no! That wasn't supposed to happen!"
Stefan immediately sat closer to her, trying to comfort her. "Maybe it doesn't have to. I talked to Bonnie, she says she's stronger than ever, there might be something that she can do to help you," he mused as Holden scoffed under his breath.
Stefan looked at Holden pleadingly. "Hate to break it to you, Stefan, but she doesn't have much until she dies truly this time. She needs to feed if she wants to live," he argued, because the thought of loosing her again made him loose his mind.
"We have all day before she has to feed, Holden," Stefan snapped as Elena looked down, crying. "That's a day to exhaust every possible way out of this."
Holden didn't want to upset the girl, but Stefan was saying nonsense things, because no one could've escaped being vampire. "I was ready to die," Elena then said as she cried. Holden frowned slightly. "I was supposed to die. I don't- I don't want to be - I can't be a vampire! If there's something that Bonnie can do we have to try."
"We will," Stefan nodded so Holden shook his head before leaving the room. "We'll try anything."
Holden met up with Damon and Izzie downstairs in the kitchen as he opened up one cabinet and poured himself some bourbon. "Way to get her hopes up for something that's never happened in the history of vampirism," Damon commented sarcastically since he heard everything.
Izzie rolled her eyes as she looked at Holden in worry. "Are you okay?" she asked Holden, who downed the whole shot of bourbon before not answering.
Stefan entered the kitchen as he stopped next to Damon and Izzie. "You know, I don't appreciate you telling Elena that there is no other way," he said calmly though wrinkles of anger appeared on his face.
"Well, if you don't like me telling the truth, I'm not going to say anything then," Holden said nonchalantly so Stefan glared at him. "I just said the truth, Stefan! There is no other way. You either complete the transition or you die! It's as simple as that!"
Stefan shook his head, not wanting to believe in that. "You weren't there the day Elena looked me in the eye and told me she absolutely never wanted this," he snapped and that made Izzie scoff loudly.
"Then instead of whining now, maybe you should've saved her then?" she asked so Stefan looked at the human girl.
"I never meant for her to die. She asked me to save Matt first and I did. I thought human life was important to you," he sneered so Izzie looked away and that made Damon angry too.
"Okay, how about we stop right now?" he raised his hands up, staring at everyone in the kitchen.
Holden rolled his eyes. "I made a choice that I will regret for the rest of my life. Now let me try to fix it," Stefan said before leaving the kitchen.
Holden knew it was also his fault. He should've swam faster, hell instead of trying to make her wake up in the water, he should've taken her out faster. He just poured himself another drink and downed it.
HOLDEN ENTERED ELENA'S ROOM TO SEE HER BREAK A LIGHTBULB THAT WAS TURNED ON. "Easy there," he spoke so Elena's body tensed as she turned around to look at him. He looked even more handsome than she remembered as she stared at his green eyes. "You're calmer. That's good, I suppose."
"Bonnie will find a way to make me human again so I'll be fine," she answered quietly as Holden just nodded, even though he thought that was bunch of nonsense. "Holden, I'm sorry but I... I uh dropped the bracelet."
He didn't even care about that, but she did. More than anything that hurt. Except that it hurt everywhere. "It doesn't matter," he whispered so Elena shook her head frantically and Holden could already see her vampire side coming out. He never dreamed of a day when Elena was vampire. She was just so human to him.
"It does," Elena argued as she wanted to cry again, which made her sick and that made her angry. "It does matter to me. Just like you."
Stefan then entered the room as he had no idea what Elena meant by a bracelet. Sure, he noticed her wearing it quite often but he never knew it was connected with his older brother. "Elena, I made some food," he said, trying to sound casual as Elena glanced at him.
"Okay," was all she said as Holden left the room, leaving Elena to frown.
After eating, Elena shielded her eyes from the sun before walking up the stairs. She went towards her room when she found Holden sitting on her bed. "I thought you left?" Elena questioned and then she saw herself, coming out from the bathroom while wearing pajamas.
"Holden," the past Elena sighed as she approached her bed so Holden stood up. That made the present day Elena stare at them in confusion.
"I'm sorry for barging in at such late time but I wanted to give you something you lost," Holden said tiredly as Elena continued watching the memory unfold. She didn't remember it from her past and realized Holden must have compelled her to forget.
Elena watched herself trying to take the necklace but Holden pulled away slightly. "I have something to tell you," he mused still holding her pendant in his hands. Elena watched herself try and take it but he just pulled it away again. "I have to say it because I can't hide it anymore. Or at least have to get it off of my chest. I love you, Elena. I don't think it was possible for me to love you, because you look just like Katherine, and yet I do. Because you're so much more than her. And because of that, I don't deserve you."
The memory Elena teared up slightly. "But Stefan does. He's been through a lot, and you... You're what he truly needs. I need you too, but you love him. I know it's always gonna be Stefan, and I understand."
He then kissed her forehead before wiping her tears. "I love you," he whispered again. "But you can't know that."
When the memory ended Elena touched her neck and frowned deeply, because she finally knew what was kept from her so long.
REBEKAH WAS IN KLAUS'S MANSION LOOKING AT THE PICTURES THAT KLAUS HAD DRAWN. She slowly picked one up and began to choke up as it hurt because she thought her brother was dead. Throwing the picture down Rebekah knocked all of them off the table in rage.
Holden entered the room from behind and the blonde noticed that. "Tragic about Elena," she mused dully as she finally faced the Salvatore. "Not to make a grey cloud greyer, but does Matt have automobile insurance?"
The Middle Salvatore wasn't quick to attack her and Rebekah was not expecting that. "You're pathetic, really," Holden never knew he could hate Rebekah as much as he used to hate Katherine. The blonde was better but she killed Elena just because she didn't want Alaric on her tail. And that wasn't very noble looking to Holden. "Killing two humans just because you couldn't handle a vampire hunter... Saving your ass like always."
Rebekah clenched her jaw tightly. "Stop," she mused quietly, but Holden just continued making her angry.
"I get it. Having Klaus as a sibling is a collateral damage to you but I thought you knew better," he mused so Rebekah rushed towards him before pushing him against the wall. Holden stared at her hatefully.
"I'm gonna kill you," she sneered, her blue eyes burning into his soul.
Holden managed to smirk. "Said that thousands of times and here we are," he then pushed her off of way, sending her on the table. Rushing over to the blonde, Holden took the white oak stake and wanted to stab her when suddenly someone started shooting bullets through the window.
It hit Holden in the arm but he managed to escape as Rebekah got shot in the heart with an arrow and collapsed to the ground, temporarily dead.
THE MIDDLE SALVATORE FELT FURIOUS. Not only someone took Rebekah, they took Stefan, Elena, Damon and Izzie, which made him worry ten times more. He was at the Gilbert house, picking stuff up that was knocked over in the commotion. Sheriff Forbes then walked in as she looked at Holden. "Everybody's gone, even my human friend Izzie. Whoever took Rebekah, took them too. Do you have anything?"
Meredith Fell then walked out of the kitchen and into the living room as Liz sighed. "I can't. The Council locked Carol and me out of our offices," she commented so Holden looked away in anger. All four people he cared for the most were taken somewhere he didn't know. "Files, computers, everything."
Holden wanted to snap at them, but he wasn't Damon. "Okay, so when Caroline called after she got away, did she know where they were taking her?" he asked tiredly and Liz saw how much he was worrying. Both of his brothers, the girl he cared for a lot and a girl he loved were all somewhere, not safe. He just hoped for Damon to take care of Izzie.
"No. Just that she was in some van in the middle of nowhere and she managed to escape," Liz said so Holden groaned causing the women to glance at each other.
Someone knocked on the front door and Holden saw Matt walking in. "Hey, is Elena here?" he asked looking guilty as if he was crying.
Holden then started marching towards him so Matt backed away before hitting the wall. "No, Elena's not here, because she's taken. And guess what, Donovan," Holden was beyond mad as he placed one hand on Matt's neck adding pressure.
Meredith and Liz both widened their eyes and rushed over to him. "Holden, stop!" Meredith tried to pull him away.
"She was taken and she's gonna die if she doesn't feed. So if you wanted to see Elena, leave!" he sneered as Matt tried to pry Holden's hand off of his throat.
"Holden, please let him go now!" Liz sneered so Holden finally let go of Matt's neck as he walked back into the living room as Matt touched his swollen neck before Liz looked at the boy sadly.
The four then continued talking. "With Damon's vervain and Alaric's weapons..." Liz shook her head in frustration as Holden sat down on the couch. "They could be anywhere."
"Let's just think," Holden encouraged as he avoided looking at Matt. "It doesn't take a lot to hold a human captive. But Izzie has three plus one almost vampires with her. They knew who they were taking so of course they have reinforced steel, iron doors..."
Matt looked up at Holden. "The Pastor has a cattle ranch," he announced so everyone looked at him. "Those pens could easily be modified."
Meredith nodded, agreeing. "It's remote, it's secluded."
Holden then stood up as he glanced at Donovan. "Guess what? You just proved how sorry you want to be," he snapped and that made Matt sigh. "Let's go."
Matt stood up cautiously before the two walked out of the house and got into Holden's car. Holden knew how to get the Pastor out. He just knew that for that Elena might hate him.
PASTOR'S RANCH WAS REALLY SECLUDED. Damon was in one of the barn's rooms, locked away as he glanced at Izzie, to see her try to get out of her cell. He smirked weakly from the vervain as she glanced at him. "You still up?" she asked quietly, knowing he would hear.
The two were in the Salvatore house when they ambushed them. Damon tried to tell Pastor that Izzie was human and that they would leave her alone, but they weren't listening. Damon knew Holden was gonna send Izzie far far away because not only a week passed and she was in trouble.
The vampire then started to crawl towards the bars just so Izzie could hear him. "I have to invite them here," Damon managed to say as vervain continued being sprayed into his cell. "They have to see that you're human."
"No, I'm gonna get outta here and I'm gonna free all of you," Izzie exclaimed through gritted teeth as she tried to unlock the lock.
Damon looked at the girl softly before resting his head against the bars. "It's not gonna work. Those bars are created for vampires, so that they wouldn't get out."
"Let me keep some faith!" Izzie hissed lowly as the pin she had from her hair broke from all the fiddling with it. The girl sighed before throwing it away. "Great."
"Let's just hope Holdie finds us before we're all staked down," Damon joked dryly as they were kept a bit away from Stefan, Elena, who was dying from not having blood, and Rebekah.
Izzie furrowed her eyebrows then. "Where does Holdie come from?" she asked as Damon glanced at her. "Cause you're the only one calling him like that."
"With the exceptions from Stefan," Damon corrected as he remembered the origins of Holdie. "I'd much rather talk about a place."
"What place?"
"A place, where I'm taking you on our first date," Damon smoothly said and that made Izzie chuckle.
"Think again, smooth boy," she commented dully so Damon looked at her with one of his seductive looks. "Really though? Why do you call Holden Holdie most of the time?"
Damon then rested his back on the bars, turning away from Izzie. "It's embarrassing, really," he commented dully. "When I was 8, Holden was half my age... Our dad used to beat me for every little crime I did, and I did a lot. Holden was the favorite son. I don't know why dad chose him. Maybe because from birth he was well mannered. Well... One day dad was beating me for taking his cigar and acting all men like. Holden bursted into the room and told dad a lie. Mother needs you to help her with baby Stefan, he said."
Izzie frowned when she heard Damon talk sadly. He went through a lot. "Dad left and Holden rushed over to me, I saw him crying. He wanted to comfort me, but I wasn't the one in pain. Now, think about it... There was a time I loved my brothers more than anything..." he said lowly as Izzie smiled, knowing that he loved them now too. Just didn't show it. "So I just wanted to make him feel better. I said you can be my guardian angel from now on and his face lit up. He was small, he didn't even know what guardian angel meant. He just couldn't see me be beaten up so he decided to protect me. I let him. I said every angel needs a second name."
"And that is how Holdie came?" Izzie asked so Damon finally turned to look at her.
"Oh, you wanted to hear about that?" he asked sarcastically so Izzie glared at him angrily. Damon sighed. "Holdie liked his name too much to have another. So I just shortened it and there it was. Now, I'm sick of vervain so excuse me."
Damon crawled away as Izzie could only imagine Holden worrying about them as much as Damon worried about him.
Outside the barn, Holden and Matt got out of Holden's car and started walking towards the house. "So, what, we just storm the place with zero weapons?" Matt questioned angrily.
Holden turned to look at him. "I know you're gonna hate me for this, but..." he then vamped out and bit Matt in the neck harshly before pulling away.
Matt fell to the ground as he groaned in pain, trying to hold onto his bite. Holden looked at Pastor's Ranch before rolling his eyes expressively. "You missed one vampire!" he raised his voice, talking sarcastically.
Pastor Young then opened his front door and saw the human boy lying on the ground, bleeding. "Let him go," he said sternly as Holden stared at the man. "The boy's innocent."
"Just as Izzie is," Holden answered but Pastor Young just continued looking at Holden blankly. "Give me Stefan, Damon, Elena and Izzie and he's all yours."
Holden then walked back to Matt before making him stand on his feet. "I never liked the killing," he shrugged, acting. He didn't want to kill Matt, but Pastor Young and even Matt had to think that way. "And I really want to kill him."
"Go away!" Pastor Young shouted furiously. "You are not invited in and I'm not coming out!"
Holden rolled his eyes then suddenly got shot in the chest. He groaned before falling to the ground, bringing Matt down with him. He continued lying down, his eyes closed as two officers came around the corner with their guns out.
They slowly approached Holden's body and exchanged a look. One of them gently nudged Holden with his foot, but the Salvatore didn't move.
Suddenly, Holden's eyes snapped open as he used vampire speed to get up. The Salvatore plunged his hand into the officer's heart and extracted it harshly before snapping another's neck.
He sighed then saw Matt crawling away from Holden. The Salvatore approached Matt before crouching down besides him. Matt stopped as he glanced up at Holden hatefully. "Kill me already," he sneered as Holden raised his eyebrow up. "You can't possibly hate me more than I hate myself."
"I don't hate you," Holden shrugged before standing straight. "But if that's what you want then."
Before he could do anything to Matt, out of nowhere someone rushed towards Holden before pushing him off of Matt. It was Elena as she stared at Holden with her vampire face. "Leave him alone!" the new vampire exclaimed as Holden stared at her with wide eyes.
ELENA AND HOLDEN STARED AT EACH OTHER. "How could you try to kill Matt?" Elena asked angrily as Holden looked away from her. "You knew it was my choice to save him, Holden. Why can't you see that?!"
"Whatever, Elena," Holden told her coldly and wanted to go and search for Izzie, but Elena grabbed his arm and stopped him. She was strong now, he felt that by her touch.
"I remember," Elena then said as she slowly let go of Holden's arm as he just looked at her. "I remember everything. It's one of the things in transition. You remember everything that was made for you to forget."
Holden shrugged dully so Elena tilted her head to a side. "I never knew you compelled me. Twice. I never knew I met you before my parents died. The way you thought I was Katherine. Or how you confessed..." the last sentence came out quietly.
Somehow Holden was able to breathe better because finally she knew everything he ever told her. "So? What does that changes?" he questioned her as Elena looked at him, telling him that it would change everything. "I don't think so, Elena. You already made your choice."
"I did, but that doesn't mean you can spill your anger out on Matt, or even Stefan," Elena argued sternly but Holden didn't listen. "If you want to be angry with someone, be angry with me! Tell me something, if you were quicker than Stefan, and if I would've asked you to save Matt instead of me, would've you have done it?"
Holden remained quiet, because he didn't know the answer. "I knew it," she sighed as Holden glanced back at her. "Matt would be dead, Holden!"
"So what?!" he shouted and that caught Elena off guard. "I don't care about Matt nor have I ever did, in case you forgot! People go and die, they do it everyday."
Elena shrugged. "I died too. So how am I different?" she asked.
"The difference is that I care about you! People save those who they care and love, not those who they barely know!" Holden raised his voice and then noticed Damon and Izzie leaving barn. He breathed out in relief. "I'm done talking."
He started walking away but then remembered the bracelet. He turned back to face Elena and handed it to her. "Thought you might want it back. Not so sure now," he mused coldly.
Elena looked at it before putting it on back on her wrist and walking away.
"Izzie!" Holden started running towards her and they hugged. He squeezed her tightly before kissing her head. "Are you okay?!"
Izzie pulled away and nodded her head with a smile. "Thank God," he whispered before hugging her once again. He was glad Izzie was fine and decided to worry about her safety another day.
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