Why doesn't anyone want to join the Greek Friendship Society?
Shortly after midterms, Halloween arrived. Frank somehow managed to convince the entire student body that dressing up for Halloween was the coolest thing ever, so I was left trying to figure out what to dress up as. After some consideration, I decided to dress up as a mummy, because after midterms, a mummy seemed like an appropriate representation of my inner self. I felt dead inside, but for some reason, I was still alive.
Patrick wasn't as into Halloween as some of my other friends, so he simply threw on a pair of devil's horns and handed out full-sized candy bars to anyone who bothered to stop by Room 27 in Flack Hall. Joe and Andy stopped by early in the day, dressed in even lazier costumes than Patrick, but we didn't get too many other people until later that night, so I decided to take a quick nap while Patrick took over manning the door.
About an hour later, I woke up to Kylo Ren whacking me in the face with a lightsaber.
"Can you please stop that?" I said as I opened my eyes again.
"I know what I must do," a familiar voice said as the lightsaber hit me a few more times. "I don't know if I'm strong enough to do it. Will you help me?"
"Laura, you are getting way too in character," Frank commented from the hallway.
"Sorry Frank," Laura said. "I just really like Star Wars."
"We all know, Laura," Frank said. "Ryan, you've got to come to the Aubergine tonight. I know you need sleep after finals, and to be honest, I probably do too, but this is going to worth it."
"It's Frank's twenty first birthday!" Gerard said.
"Oh, happy birthday, Frank," I said as I got out of bed and spotted Gerard and Frank standing just outside of my dorm room. They were both dressed up in matching skeleton costumes.
"Thanks," Frank said. "I'm kind of excited for tonight."
"Let's just say that we're going to get him wasted and alone," Gerard said.
"I don't know if that's necessary," Frank said. "I've been drinking illegally for years, and trust me, getting that drunk isn't fun at all. My twenty first birthday is just an arbitrary milestone."
"Come on, Frank," Gerard said. "We can at least have some fun. We'll go trick or treating on the way."
"Sounds great," Frank said.
The four of us ended up going trick or treating around campus, passing through the rest of Flack Hall, the Greek Friendship Society house, Orlando Hall, and Shadow Hall before heading off campus. Thanks to the generosity of my fellow college students, I arrived at the Aubergine with a full stomach and a cheerful disposition.
It seemed that the others at the Aubergine had gotten into the Halloween spirit as well. I spotted a variety of creative costumes, but there was something about Brendon's vampire costume that drew me in. "Hey Ryan," Brendon said when he saw me. "That's a pretty sweet costume."
"Thanks," I said. "I like yours too."
"Thank you," Brendon said with a slight swish of his cape. "I was going to wear vampire teeth, but I figured those would be hard to sing in. Besides, they'd distract from my beautiful smile." Brendon gave me a wide, goofy grin, and I couldn't help but agree with him.
"Don't flatter yourself, Brendon," Spencer said as he adjusted his werewolf costume.
"Spencer, you're awesome, but sometimes, you just need to shut up," Brendon said. "Ryan, are you ready to go?"
"I think so," I said. I sat down on the piano bench and began to lose myself in the music, glad that I had my friends with me for Halloween.
By the time I returned to campus, the festivities were over. Patrick was fast asleep, with his devil horns resting next to his bed. I had actually enjoyed my Halloween more than I usually did, thanks to Spencer and Brendon. Even dressing up was kind of fun that year.
The next day, Gerard showed up in Flack Hall again. Patrick and I were hanging out in the common room, and just as Patrick was telling me about some lab that he had done in biology class, Gerard spontaneously appeared and asked, "Have either of you two made up your mind about the Greek Friendship Society yet?"
"I don't know," Patrick said. "Can I have more time to think?"
"You could always come to another one of our parties," Gerard suggested. "That might help you make up your mind."
"I'm not so sure about that," Patrick said.
"Come on," Gerard insisted. "It will be fun. Ryan, you could come too."
"I'm not joining Greek Friendship Society, Gerard," I said. I knew that some of my thoughts were true, and others weren't, but the thought that I didn't have any reason to join Gerard's society was almost certainly correct.
"Let me know if you change your mind, Ryan," Gerard said.
"I will," I said.
"Patrick, will you please come to our party on Saturday?" Gerard asked.
Patrick thought about it for a few minutes and then said, "I guess so."
"Great," Gerard said. "I'll see you then."
It was just my luck that I ended up having other plans that Saturday. Shortly after I refused Gerard's offer to join Delta Omicron Gamma, I heard from a boy in my philosophy class named Eduardo that Epsilon Kappa Iota was throwing a party that same day. "They're a really neat fraternity," Eduardo explained. "A lot of philosophy students are in it."
Even though I wasn't sure that joining a fraternity (or Greek Friendship Society, for that matter) at all was a good idea, I couldn't resist the idea of having intellectual discussions all day with a group of my fellow classmates. If I was going to join a fraternity, it would be Epsilon Kappa Iota.
That day, I showed up in the Epsilon Kappa Iota house, which was right next to the Delta Omicron Gamma house. The two houses looked quite similar, but while the Greek Friendship Society house was swarming with Frank's four-legged friends, there were no animals in sight at the Epsilon Kappa Iota house.
At first, I didn't know what to do. There were plenty of fraternity men wandering around the house, drinking and dancing to the generic pop music playing in the background. I recognized a few of them from my Introduction to Philosophy class, but most of the fraternity members were unfamiliar. If I had gone to the Greek Friendship Society party, I could have at least talked to Patrick, Frank, and Gerard, and perhaps Laura if she bothered to show up.
After a few minutes of wandering around the house, a tall, bespectacled man with short, blond hair came up to me. "Hello there," he said. "You must be one of the freshmen. What's your name?"
"Ryan," I answered.
"Nice to meet you, Ryan," the man said. "I'm Ben. So Ryan, what's your life story?"
I wasn't sure how to respond to that. So much had happened in my life up to that point, yet there was nothing important or mind-blowing in my past. Why do we all go through life without ever doing anything meaningful?
Ben noticed my hesitation and said, "How about we narrow it down to the last ten years?"
"That's not terribly helpful," I said. "I didn't do anything important before I was eight."
"It's still easier than telling me everything that happened to you over your whole life," Ben said. "How about this? Why are you here?"
"That's a good question, Ben," I said. "I have no idea why I'm here on Earth, and I'm looking for a good answer. I don't think I'll ever understand my true purpose until I find the answer to that question."
"I was asking why you were at this party, not why you were on Earth," Ben said.
"Eduardo asked me to come," I said.
"Oh, that's nice," Ben said. "Eduardo's a pretty cool guy, but we're still figuring out whether we want to give him a formal invitation to join or not. I'm glad he's helping us increase our membership though."
"I never said that I was going to join Epsilon Kappa Iota," I said.
"Ryan, I'll be honest with you," Ben said. "If you're even thinking about joining a fraternity, we're probably your best option."
"Why do you think that?" I asked.
"Just look at all of the other fraternities," Ben said. "None of them are worth joining. Theta Gamma Gamma is possibly the most elitist group of students you'll ever find. Most of the fraternity is made up of rich kids who can't deal with anyone new joining their exclusive little club. They're also mostly science or business majors, so they're not particularly nice to philosophy majors like us. Lambda Gamma Sigma isn't much better. They won't accept anyone who's not a varsity athlete."
"What if I joined the fencing team?" I asked. Sports weren't my thing, but I always enjoying thinking about hypothetical situations like that.
"Lambda Gamma Sigma doesn't take kindly to newbies either, and fencing is a club sport," Ben explained. "I would also stay far away from Zeta Chi Omega. They're the most stereotypical fraternity you'll find here on campus. They don't do anything other than drinking absurd amounts of alcohol and hooking up with girls from Rho Eta Zeta."
"What about Delta Omicron Gamma?" I asked.
"What's that?" Ben asked.
"I think he means the Greek Friendship Society," one of Ben's friends said.
"The Greek Friendship Society?" Ben said. "Just stay away from them. They're not a real fraternity. They're just a bunch of gay weirdos who wish they were in a fraternity."
"You're right about that, Ben," his friend said.
"The Greek Friendship Society isn't all that bad," I said. "I went to one of their parties once."
"Seriously?" Ben said as he gave me a strange look.
"They're the Greek Friendship Society, kid," Ben's friend said. "Nobody takes them seriously."
"That's not true. Gerard Way sure takes the Greek Friendship Society seriously, but I don't think anyone else does, not even his little dog-loving boyfriend," Ben said, prompting a laugh from his friend.
Thankfully, that was the end of our discussion on the Greek Friendship Society, but I had made up my mind. I wasn't about to join an organization that made fun of some of my closest friends. Shortly before nine in the afternoon, I left the party to go to the Aubergine, and I never looked back. Clearly, Epsilon Kappa Iota wasn't for me.
The next day, I asked Patrick how the Greek Friendship Society party went. "It was okay," Patrick said. "I spent most of the party petting Frank's dogs. They're so cute!"
"Do you think you'll join the Greek Friendship Society?" I asked.
"I don't know yet," Patrick replied. "Do you think you'll join Epsilon Kappa Iota?"
"I'm not going to join a fraternity or the Greek Friendship Society," I said. "It's just not worth the trouble. I can have a healthy social life without being tied down to one organization."
Patrick thought about it for a few minutes and then said, "Maybe I'll do that too. I'd rather be here in Flack Hall than live in the Greek Friendship Society house. It's too rambunctious in there."
I nodded, but the events of the previous night made me think. Why were other people so hateful towards the Greek Friendship Society? Yes, they were annoying and kept me up all night, but I could never hate them. The few Greek Friendship Society members that I was close with were perfectly nice people. Perhaps all of us need to learn not to judge others before we truly get to know them. A little less prejudice in the world might go a long way.