Dedicated to CreativeDreamer01 for helping me out and being so amazing :) xxx
I stand in the bathroom, looking into the mirror as I apply my make-up when I hear a gentle knock on the door.
"Babe we need to be out in ten minutes, so can you hurry up? I mean.. you look beautiful without the make-up, you don't need it," I roll my eyes, take my make up bag and open the door, still in my dressing gown.
"I'll be two seconds," I say and rush into his room, changing into my black dress and shoes before walking out to meet Nathan.
"You look stunning," he said, making me blush a scarlett red. He took my hand and lead me out of the door, on our way to the car.
Kyle drove us to the club, and throughout the entire journey, I have been on edge. I have worried over whether Kelly and Steph will be happy to see me, the way James will treat me and whether anything will happen due to my new found danger. Nathan has told me to stay with Kyle, to make sure I stay away from James. He is still angry that he threatened me the way he did, that he scared me the way he did. I on the other hand, just want to go home. I just have this really bad feeling that something is going to go wrong. The butterflies feel more like bees as they fly around my stomach, making me feel so sick and dizzy.
I walk in with Kyle, shaking a little as we make our way through large room with people stuffed inside. I choke a little on the smoke and struggle to see through the lights, but we eventually make it the people we are looking for. I immediately receive a glare from James but I am impressed with small smiles I get from the two girls I miss the most. I smile back, trying to be unfazed by James, looking anywhere and everywhere. I see in the corner, well away from Steph is Casey, her body draped over a blonde man. Typical.
"Shall we dance?" I take Kyle's hand and he takes me a little further away from the group and we dance, in front of each other. Kyle attempts to dance sexily but fails, so he tells me to try. I do, moving up and down, swinging my hips and bum around. He tells me I am pretty good, and so I blush, and turn to see Nathan staring straight at me. Did he see me? Oh well, I think and continue to dance, trying to relax a little.
When I am tired, I return to the bar and check my phone. I have one new message.
From Nathan
Meet me at the fire exit in ten minutes x
To Nathan
Okay? x
I reply and see him, on the other side of the bar, looking at his phone. He sends me one wink before going to talk to some people I have never met before, but he seems to know very well. Maybe they are the ther people in the team. I drink an orange juice with Kyle beside me. I see Steph an Kelly having fun together and immediately feel regretful that I haven't sorted things out with them yet. I am about to do that when I realise it has been ten minutes and Nathan has gone. I tell Kyle I am going to bathroom and search for the fire exit sign. When I see the small, green rectangle. I almost run toward it, opening the door and stepping outside.
Nathan's hands find their way to my waist and his lips push onto mine, all in almost a second. I am taken aback, but I just play with his hair as I kiss him, my back pressed against a cold brick wall.
"Where were you?" He asks between kisses.
" I was talking to Kyle," I answer as he kisses me again.
"By the way, don't dance like that again," he warns, his voice serious and stern.
"Why?" I tease, and he smirks.
"Because I can't do this all of the time," he replies, kissing me once more before completely leaving me.
"Stay with Kyle," he says before taking me back to the door and pushing me through. He stays, so I assume he is waiting so that we are not suspicious. I struggle to find Kyle and when I do, he gives me the disapproving look. He knows what we just did.
"Sorry," I apologise and see him shake his head, tutting. I laugh and drink my drink, thinking back over the last few minutes. I want to go back, to see him again, but I know I can't so instead, I decide on sorting things with the girls. I leave kyle to look around, hoping to see them dancing somewhere in the middle of the room.
When I am looking, I see Casey, her back pressed against a different person. She has her arms around his neck, his head in her shoulder, doing god knows what. When I look closer I see that this person she is with has messy, brown hair, is wearing a grey t-shirt and...black jeans. No. No.
He lifts his head as she moves her hips in time with his and I swear I thorw up in my mouth. I stand there shocked and scared. How could he? He is doing the thing I have always been afraid of.
I spin around and run, not wanting to see how much closer they can get. Tears fall from my eyes as I head towards the exit. I see Kyle in the distance, looking at the same sight as me, shock written on his face.
"Lily! Oh my God, are you okay?" Steph asks from by the door of the club, and she looks genuinely concerned.
"I'll be fine, thank you," I say and she nods, letting me walk out. Then, I leave, as fast as I can and phone a taxi, wanting nothing more than to go home. As soon as the taxi arrives I get in it, not wanting to be seen by anybody else, especially Nathan. I don't want to see him, speak to him or even look at him.
How dare he dance with her of all people after he kisses me like that? How can he cheat on me? After everything this is the last thing I expected him to do. Maybe I should have expected something, especially after all of he lies he told me, all of the secrets he kept. Maybe this was another secret? Maybe he has been seeing her the whole time? I wipe the tears from my eyes as I run up to his room, throwing the door open and slamming it. I'm so angry, so fucking angry at him! I take the plate from the side and smash it on the wall. I then throw the home phone at the wall. Then the vase. Then the canvas. When the flat is successfully turned upside down, I go to his bed, where I lie there, crying.
From Nathan
Babe, where are you? x
I read the message and ignore it, he doesn't deserve to know where I am. If he knew me at all he would find me.
From Nathan
I'm worried, baby where are you? Are you safe? x
I once again throw the phone down beside me, wanting him to worry an d panic so that when he realises where I am he can feel stupid.
From Kyle
Lily, how are you? Are you okay?
That message, the one from Kyle, my only friend right now, I feel like I should reply to, because he saw how upset I was, he saw me leave and he knows how much it must have hurt me seeing him with that bitch. He looked just as shocked as I was, so I decided to reply.
To Kyle
I'm not good, I'm back at his place, thanks for everything
I lie there, in the bed, the duvet around me, surrounded by everything that reminds me of him, the scent on his shirt that lies on the pillow, the pictures in the frames, the whole room is just a reminder of him and then it hurts. I feel like I have been ripped apart. It hurts so fucking much.
This is how my mom must have felt, this is how she would have been feeling when she found at my dad had been having an affair. It must have been a hundred times worse for her, especially after being married to him for so long. Me and Nathan have only been together for a month or two. Still, I feel like complete shit.
"Lily? LILY! Are you here?" I jump out the sound of his harsh, scared shout and practically jump out of bed. I hope he sees the mess I made in the living room, I hope he feels like shit, the way he should after the way he has treated me.
I open the door and see him observing the state of the living room, god how much did I break?
"Did someone break in? What the hell happened?" He asks and I glare at his beautiful face, wanting to punch it.
"I got angry," I state and watch his eyes widen.
"What made you this angry? Why did you leave the club and why have you been ignoring my texts? I was worried sick," he says the lies pouring from his mouth. But he is a professional at lying, he does it all the fucking time.
"When did you notice I left, before or after you cheated on me with Casey? Or did you not know I knew that?" I spat, and watch as his face turns pale. I'm scared I won't be able to contain just how angry I actually am. He tries to speak, then stops. He tries again, but stops.
"Well?" I ask and see him look so guilty, so in pain I almost feel bad for him. The key word is almost.
"I had to do all of that, I had no choice," he tries but I cut him off.
"BULLSHIT!" I scream as more tears try to fall. He had no choice? Really? Was that his best excuse?
"Can you just listen to me please?" He asks, but i shake my head, tears dripping off my face.
"I saw you Nathan, I watched her all over you and then you all over her and I felt sick, I still feel so sick, it was her," I say and watch his eyes drop.
"I know what happened, but there was a reason for it, a real reason," he says, begging.
"How do I know you won't lie to me? You've done it before, a lot, so what's so different now?"
"The difference is that I'm not lying this time, I was going to tell you everything that happened if you hadn't have already found out, I'm not denying it, it happened and I hated it but there was a reason and I need you to listen to me," he says.
Flashback Nathan's P.O.V
I returned to James and Kelly, trying to act as if nothing had happened. I stood beside them and took a long drink, not looking at either of them.
"So, where is Lily?" James asked and I knew that look, he knew and he was trying to catch me out. Luckily, I was an expert at lying, I was a vampire living amongst humans for God sake.
"I have no idea," I replied and watch his forehead crease with irritation.
"Kelly, go and get some air for a while," he ordered and Kelly nodded, not asking why and not thinking for herself, just doing as he said.
"Are you sure you don't like her? Are you sure you're not seeing her?" He asked maliciously and I so badly want to punch him in the face, especially after the way he treated Lily.
"Yes," I replied shortly, irritated myself with the fact that he was dragging it on so much.
"Prove it," he said and I looked up, confused.
"Do you want me to go and make her tell you?""
"No, Casey is over there, and we all know how much she likes to dance," he challenged and I felt sick at the thought of being anywhere anyone except Lily, especially her.
"What?"
"Go and prove to me that you're not with Lily," he ordered, authority clear in his voice. I downed my drink and slam it on the bar.
"Fine," I spat and made my way to Casey. She looked so slutty in her tight, short dress. I wish it wasn't her, anyone but her.
I placed my hands on her hips and pull her close to me. She automatically placed her hands on the back of my head, moving her hips from side to side. She didn't even know who it was! I moved my hips with hers, trying to feel less like I wanted to be sick. I hated it, ever second. I couldn't wait for it to be over.It had been one song, so I looked over at James for confirmation that I was done but he shook his head, telling me that I wasn't and then he motioned for me to keep going. I could see in his eyes he was not convinced, so I moved my hands to her arse, hiding the disgust on my face by hiding it in her neck. I remembered dancing with Lily like this, but she wasn't rubbing herself on me, she was actually dancing.
I looked over to James once again but he still was not convinced, so I kissed her neck, feeling like a complete shit boyfriend who did not deserve Lily at all. He still was not convinced and that was when I knew what he wanted. He wanted me to kiss her and I knew that there was no way in hell that was happening. I may have kissed her neck, I may have touched her arse but I was not going to kiss her. I would never do that to Lily, I would never take it that far.
I stopped dancing with her, I left her there and walked straight past James and text her, asking where she was. I needed to tell her, I needed to explain myself.
"Hey, where is Lily?" I asked when I saw Kyle but he looked at me with disgust.
"I don't know but why the fuck were you kissing Casey's fucking neck?!" He shouted, and then I realised that he had seen and gotten the wrong idea.
"James was onto me and Lily, he made me prove we weren't together, I was protecting her," I pleaded, trying to make him understand that I would never cheat on her. Kyle knew me, so he nodded, because he knew James as well and he knew he was capable of that. He agreed to help me find her, and so we looked everywhere, but she was nowhere to be seen. I text her again, but there was still no answer.
I then asked Kyle to text her, to ask where she was and if she was okay because I was scared. What if someone took her? What if she was hurt? All of those horrifying thoughts were crashed as Kyle received a reply, telling me that she was at my flat. Why did she leave? Why didn't she answer me?
I ran out of the club and Kyle drove me home, where I ran up the stairs and burst into the flat, screaming her name, needing her to answer...
Lily's P.O.V
I don't want to hear his story, no matter how innocent he is. I saw him kissing another girl's neck, touching her bum and dancing with her, about two minutes after he kissed me. I don't care about reasons, I saw that happen and it hurt like hell to see him do that to me.
"I'm going to bed," I say, sighing as I turn around, heading back inside the bedroom, ready to let sleep try and make the pain go away.
"No, baby, please, I need to do something to make you understand," he pleads but I shake my head.
"You've done enough," I whisper, tears rolling down my face. I walk into his room, shutting the door behind me, before I change into an oversized top and a pair of shorts. I don't bother to take my ake-up off or anything, I just crawl under the covers, and let the tears fall.
I wake up, Nathan sat on the bed, my face soaking wet from the sweat and tears, my palms in pain from how hard I have dug my nails into them. I try to breathe more slowly, to stop crying but I can't.
"Baby, it's okay, don't cry, I'm here," he whispers, shushing me. He pulls me into him and even though I am still mad at him, I still hate what he did, I hug him back, crying onto his shoulder. I just need someone, anyone who can make the dreams go away, make them dissappear.
"It's okay, shush, everything is okay, it's over and I'm here," he soothes and I lean on him, controlling my breathing.
"You left, he took me, they all took me,"I sob as he gently rocks me, calming me. I wonder what time it is, I know I won't sleep after this.
"I will never leave you and I won't let anyone take you or hurt you, I promise I will keep you safe," he whispers,missing my head as he lies beside me, hugging me.
"You cheated on me," I whimper, still hugging him, needing something to hold onto.
"I didn't want to touch her, or even go near her, but James told me to prove that I wasn't with you and I had to make sure he didn't find out about us, especially after he threatened you, I know what he would do to you and I couldn't let that happen, so I had to do what he wanted. He made me dance with her, so I did and he made me do more step by step but I refused to kiss her, not properly. I would never kiss her, not the way I kiss you. I could never do that," he said and I heard the hurt in his voice, so I decided to let him know the truth.
"My dad cheated on my mom and tried to take me as he walked out, I was only young," I admit and hear him sigh.
"I am so sorry, if I'd have known," he says and kisses my head again.
"That's what I have nightmares about, it's why I have panic attacks, it's why Ollie rings so much, he looks after me, it's why I got so mad," I explain and he hugs me tighter, he holds me and I cry again.
"I promise you, no matter what James says, I will never do what I did again, I promise you, I was an idiot and I am so sorry, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you," he says and I feel better now that I have had a civilised conversation with him and sorted it out. Getting angry wasn't the best idea, it was stupid and as I lie here I decide to trust him and pray that I am not stupid for believing him.
"Its okay I just can't deal with it if it happens again, I won't believe you, I'll leave you," I warn and he nods.
"Then you'll have every right and I will never do that to you, I will never cheat on you or hurt you again, you mean to much to me Lily," he whispers and I fall asleep, his arms still around me.