The rest of the school day passed without Hanan taking notice. She was still mulling over the fact that she would need to shadow Amir for an entire week. Sure, she could have just shadowed someone else who was majoring in another science field, but she didn't want to be anything other than a doctor. That was her passion, her dream. Everyone knew that, especially Mr.H, who would undoubtedly ask why she didn't shadow a medical student. And no, she couldn't lie to him, nor could she say, "I didn't want to shadow someone whom I have feelings for because then maybe I might grow to like them so much, I have to tell someone about it." He would look at her like she was someone crazy and give her a freaking eighty!
Hanan sighed again, for the umpteenth time, in Amina's car. The day had passed quickly, and she and her friends were now on their way to Amina's house; to Amir's house. Before she knew it, they had arrived, and Amina was ushering them inside her place. Hanan didn't take notice of the house's neat and spacious interior. She just sat down with the rest of the girls inside the living room, wondering how she was going to ask Amir if she could shadow him for an entire week. "Hey. I know you're a medical student. I have to do a project for my chem class, so can I shadow you for a week?" No, that would sound too creepy. I know you're a medical student? Stalker much? Can I shadow you for a week? At school, at home, in your room at night... whoa, where did that come from? Audhubillah!
"HANAN!" Amina's yelling broke Hanan out of her cringey thoughts.
"Yes?" she asked.
"Are you going to shadow Amir for Mr.H's project," she asked.
"Umm, I think I'd have to ask my parents first," Hanan said.
"Why would you need to ask your parents?" Batool asked.
"Umm, cause Amir is a non-Muhram, and I shouldn't be alone with a non-Muhram," Hanan replied.
"But you wouldn't be alone. You'd be in a public area on campus. There's no room for Shaytan there," Farah pointed out.
"True," Hanan said. Unless you have feelings for the guy, she thought.
"So let's go ask him then," Amina said enthusiastically.
"Hold up, I still need to ask my mom. Give me a second," Hanan said as she pulled out her phone and dialed her mother's number. After a few rings, her mother picked up.
"Elloo," Mama greeted.
"Salaam Mama," Hanan greeted back. "I have a question for you."
"Shinoo?"
"So I have this project for Chemistry class. For me, I need to shadow a medical student for one week and a doctor for another week. The only medical student we know is Amir, Amina's brother. Is it okay if I shadow him?" she asked her.
Mama was quiet for a moment. "No. It's wrong. He's a non-Muhram, and anything can happen," she finally said.
"Give me a moment," Hanan said. She turned to her friends. "She said no."
Amina huffed in annoyance. "Give me the phone," she said, holding her hand out for the phone. Hanan gave it to her without complaint.
"Salaam Ama," she greeted politely. After Mama had returned the greeting, Amina got right to it. "Why can't Hanan shadow Amir for her project?"
"Okay, but she's only going to be shadowing him at school, in a public area. Nothing bad will happen."
"Okay, how about if I shadow Amir as well. I'll make sure that the two of them will never be alone together."
"Come on Ama, it's for her future. Weren't you the one who insisted that Hanan become a doctor? This will help her with that."
"Please Ama. I promise you that I won't ever leave the two of them alone. I'll stay with Hanan at all times."
"Wallah!"
"Okay, thank you! Here's Hanan," Amina said, finally giving Hanan the phone.
"Elloo," Hanan said, as she put the phone to her ear.
"Hanan, I'll let you shadow Amir, but you have to stay with Amina at all times, fahemti? Even if she needs to go to the bathroom or something, go with her, don't stay by yourself with Amir. Okay?"
"Okay. Ma'asalamah," Hanan said as she ended the call. She then turned to Amina and raised her eyebrows at her. "So, you're going to shadow a medical student as well?" she asked her suspiciously. Amina squirmed uncomfortably under her gaze.
"I was just trying to be a good friend," she said weakly. Hanan only grew more suspicious.
"A good friend wouldn't need to go as far as to promise to chaperon her friend and her brother," Hanan said. Batool and Farah broke into a fit of giggles.
"Okay, okay, you got me," Amina said. "It's just that, I know how long you've had a crush on my brother for, and I just wanted to help you out a teeny bit."
Hanan's mouth dropped. Batool and Farah started bawling with laughter. "What makes you say that?!" she asked angrily. Amina rolled her eyes.
"Gurl, puh-leaz, you've been all gaga over him ever since 9th grade. You think I wouldn't notice just because you've kept quiet about it?" she sneered.
Hanan lost it. "AND YOU THINK THAT BY SETTING ME UP WITH A NON-MUHRAM WITHOUT OUR PARENT'S PERMISSION YOU'LL BE HELPING ME SOMEHOW!!! A'UDHUBILLAH!" she screamed. She then proceeded to stomp out of the room, only to crash into someone.
"Whoa!" a deep and manly voice said into her ear, making her shiver. She recognized that voice. Hanan quickly pushed Amir away and stepped back, lowering her gaze. She could hear the collective gasp of the idiots behind her, so she turned around and gave them the iciest glare she could muster. They all gulped and hid.
"Hanan?" Amir asked in surprise.
"Yeah?" she replied, still not looking up.
"Why are you running around the house? You could've hurt yourself you know," he scolded. Hanan thanked Allah for her not-pale skin, otherwise everyone would have seen her turn beet red. Having said that, Hanan still felt her ears burn from embarrassment.
"Sorry," she whispered, trying hard not to make her voice quiver. She still hadn't looked up. Perhaps Amir noticed her discomfort, because his tone was much softer when he spoke next.
"It's okay as long as you understand. Now, if you would excuse me, I need to speak with my sister," he said. He then raised his voice and said, "Amina, stop eavesdropping and come to my room. We need to talk."
Amina rushed out of the living room and shot Hanan a guilty look, before going upstairs, to her brother's room presumably. Amir followed suit, leaving Hanan alone in the hallway. Once the sounds of his footsteps had faded, Hanan turned around and returned to the living room, where Farah and Batool were sitting down mutely. She joined them, and it was very quiet. Finally, Hanan had had enough.
"Guys, listen. What Amina said, just forget it," she told them. Farah looked at her sadly.
"It's okay. We won't talk about it. It's just that we want for you to be happy, that's why Amina did what she did," Farah said. Hanan felt a bit guilty for the way she shouted at her friend. Still, a sin was a sin, and her friends should know that better than anyone else.
"I'll apologize to Amina later. I just hope that nothing like this will ever be repeated. We are Muslims, and Muslims don't beat around the bush, they get right to the point and put a ring on it," Hanan declared boldly. Farah and Batool burst out laughing.
"Put a ring on what?" Amir's voice interrupted their merriment. All three girls turned around to face Amir, who was standing casually with his side leaning against the wall, arms crossed. He was smirking, making it apparent that he had heard Hanan's declaration.
"What else would you put a ring on?" Hanan asked defensively, feeling extremely embarrassed. At this, Amir's smirk only grew, though he tried to suppress it.
"Point taken. Why are girls like you talking about marriage when you should be doing your homework? You're too young for that kind of conversation," he said. Hanan was annoyed.
"Why are you telling us girls what we can and can't talk about when you have your studies? You're not an Amu, you're too young for that kind of patronising," Hanan retorted. Batool and Farah tried, and failed, to suppress their laughter. Amir struggled as well, though he was more successful in his endeavours.
"Touche. Anyways, Amina just told me that the two of you need to shadow me for your school project. Is that true?" he asked. Hanan nodded. "Okay then. When do you need to start?" he continued.
"Next week."
"I'll arrange things with my professors and have Amina tell you the schedule, okay?"
"Okay."
Amir returned to his room. Amina came back and sat down with her friends.
"What did he want?" Farah asked. Amina just sighed and shook her head.
"He told me that it was a'b to talk about crushes. He also told me to apologize to Hanan for making her feel uncomfortable. Sorry Hanan," Amina said. Hanan was mortified.
"Did he hear all that?!" she asked horrified. Amina grinned and nodded. Hanan actually felt tears in her eyes, she was so embarrassed.
"Don't worry, I told him that none of it was true, that I was just teasing her. He got mad at me and said that it was a stupid thing to do and not to do it again," Amina quickly said to stop Hanan from bawling her eyes out. Hanan sighed in relief. That was too much drama for one day.
"Let's just get started on our homework, I wanna watch a movie later tonight," Batool whined. The girls laughed and got started on their homework, which they finished in less than 4 hours, being the smart Muslims that they were.
Hanan returned home that day relieved, but still troubled. Mama had told her countless times that it was wrong to look at non-Muhram boys with affection. She had told her many times that it was a'b, shameless, and that she should only be affectionate towards the man she would eventually marry. Should she find herself crushing on someone, it must be kept absolutely secret, because if people find out, they'll talk, and that's it, Hanan's future will be ruined. She'd heard stories of women who had confessed their love for someone to their friends, and how they are still unmarried because no one wants to wed their son to a woman that looks at other men. Hanan understood her mother's reasoning and concern, which is why she was absolutely infuriated when her friends had decided to aid Hanan in her one-sided love. It wasn't going to happen, not unless Hanan was older and looking to get married. And if word got out of her affections, she'll become an old spinster. Why must people give a damn about the whims and fantasies of children? She could only pray that Amina learned to keep her mouth shut, otherwise Hanan was going to find herself in some pretty deep sugar honey ice tea in a few years.
...
The next day at school, Hanan and her friends were approached by an unexpected person.
"Hey guys!" a hot guy from class greeted, as he plopped himself down in between Hanan and Amina, disregarding the uncomfortable looks shot at him. The two scooted as far as way as possible to maintain some form of the halal gap.
"What can we do for you Alex?" Hanan asked warily. Alex was the school's playboy; girls threw themselves at him shamelessly. And why wouldn't they; after all, his gorgeous Germanic features were to die for. Even Hanan thought that he was worthy of being a model or actor.
"Well, the winter formal is coming up, and I want one of you girls to be my date for the night," he said, flashing them a dimpled grin. Hanan abruptly stood up in anger.
"Excuse me! What do you mean, 'one of you girls?" Don't you have the dignity to at least choose one of us before we reject you?!" she exclaimed.
"Whoa there. Why would you guys reject me? Who wouldn't want this," he replied, sliding his hands over his body. Hanan felt her blood boil. Just how conceited was this guy? But before she could retort, Amina stepped in.
"I would love to go with you," she said sweetly, batting her eyelashes at him. Hanan's mouth dropped. Alex grinned.
"So, it's a date then. I'll pick you up at 5," he said, before jumping back up and walking back towards his friends. Hanan watched him as his friends high fived him, and as one of them gave him what seemed to be money. Damn! It was a dare!
Hanan spun towards Amina and resisted the urge to slap her. "Why the hell did you say yes?!" she practically screamed.
"We're seniors now. This is the last winter formal we'll ever be able to attend. I just wanted to make some memories!" she said in her defence.
"I just want to make some memories," Hanan mimicked in a baby voice, twisting her face into a sneer. "Yeah, make some memories. Haram memories. That you'll remember on yom al-qiyamah!" she shouted. "What is wrong with you? First you tried to set me up with Amir, now you're trying to go to a dance. What next, are you going to take your hijab off?" she said angrily.
"You know what Hanan, that's it! I've had enough of this crap! It's my life! You can't tell me what I can and can't do!" Amina shouted back.
"Amr bil ma'ruf and nehi anil munkar sister, whatch gonna do about it!" Hanan jeered.
"Well you can use some of your own amr bil ma'ruf and nehi anil munkar by not raising your voice at me!" Amina shouted. "Aren't you the one who always tells us to be quiet? Where's that inside voice now, hmm, you munafiq?!"
"Did you just call me a munafiq?" Hanan gasped. Amina clapped her hands over her mouth, her eyes wide with sudden realization of what she had just said. She uncovered her mouth and tried to explain herself.
"Hanan, wait, I didn't mean that, you know I didn't mean that!" she said in a panicked tone. Hanan just shook her head numbly and started gathering her stuff.
"Hanan, please, it was a slip of the tongue, I didn't mean it!" Amina tried again, her voice cracking. Hanan hoisted her backpack over her shoulder and began walking away, trying to hide her own tears.
"Hanan! Hanan please forgive me!" Amina begged. But it was too late. Hanan was out of earshot, and they had already attracted to much side-eye from the other students. Batool and Farah tried to calm a sobbing Amina, but their embraces and soothing words didn't register into her mind.
Meanwhile, Hanan had locked herself inside a bathroom stall and was scaring all the other girls away with her loud sobs. Oh how she hated fighting with Amina, her best friend. But she honestly didn't know who her friend was anymore. What happened to the religious Amina, to the Amina that would smack guys with her textbook if they dared even look at her friends? What happened to that Amina?
As Hanan was mourning over her fight, she came to a conclusion. It didn't matter what Amina had become. It only mattered that Hanan took steps to ensure that her silly friend didn't do anything that would ruin her future. If people talked about girls with crushes, then what would they say about a girl that goes to dances with guys? Hanan had to save her friend and her reputation. And she knew to whom she had to go to for help.
A/N: Hey guys. Wow, this chapter went from 0-100 real quick, am I right? Some guy actually asked me out to a dance when I was in 6th grade. He sent his friends to ask me during lunch, and I was like "umm, no," and when his friends told him, he started crying in his jacket. I'm not joking, he literally started crying in his jacket, and I felt so bad, I had to go to him. So I approached him, and I'm like, "listen, I can't go to dances, I never will go to dances, and if I do, it'll be in your dreams." In retrospect, I simply wish to jump into the depths of the ocean, never to resurface. Why did I say that last part, whyyyyyy?! Anyways, I rejected him, and for the rest of my middle school career, his friends called me a jerk and a man's private part. Moral of story: if you can't handle rejection, then you can't handle a mature relationship. Also, a girl has every right to reject a guy without being called a d***! Anyways, have you guys ever been asked out before, and if so, how did you respond?
Ma'assalamah!