A new town is hard. There's not really much to say beyond that.
It isn't my initial instinct to hit the town and try to make new friends before I'm launched into school headfirst on Monday. Oh no. I decide to lock myself away in my room and pray that Monday never comes. Why?
Because I don't know anybody.
That may not sound that serious, but I'm not the kind of person that likes to draw attention. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I hate people like all those melodramatic girls in teen romance novels. I need people as much as the next person. But still, don't get me wrong, it's not that I constantly need friends or anything, or need the approval of the crowd. It's just...
Uh it's so hard to explain.
Let's just say I'm no loner. I like to have a friend or two that I can call my own and who can fly under the radar with me, but new schools are never good for that. Everyone already has their cliques, so I'll be the odd one out and, as a result, I'll draw attention to myself.
Especially because this town seems so close knit despite it clearly being in the suburbs. It's not like there's a corner store or anything. There aren't any noticeable fields or tractors or people outside in rocking chairs. This place has a fully functioning Walmart, a mall about fifteen minutes away, and plenty of civilization, but god do these people stare like they've never seen a stranger before.
I remind myself that we only have to live here for a year and then I drown the world out with anything I can find-band music, anime, romance novels about mythical creatures and love at first sight.
I have a theory. Not about werewolves or vampires. Not even about love or what constitutes it, because honestly who am I to say whether love at first sight is impossible, it's not like I've ever been in love (besides this one guy who had a guitar and... well, that's a story for another day).
No, I have a theory about sight itself. I think we don't see things for what they are. We see them for what we believe them to be, and as a result, we see no one. Sometimes when I look into the mirror I don't think I even see myself. Well, of course I do. I'm not talking like vampires don't see themselves, I'm talking about I see myself but not.
I go on everyday like I'm doing the same routine. I just cycle and cycle and cycle, not like I'm living new lives, but like I'm living the same day over and over and over again and calling that my life. I feel like... I'll lose my mind from the monotony of it. I need something to radically change my life before I go crazy, or, at least lose what's left of my sanity. And somehow, I don't think changing towns will cut it.
I need something big. Something life changing. Something monumental like insane love, or an amazing job opportunity, or... I don't know, a dog?
"Mia," my mother calls my name from downstairs.
"Yes?" I call over the sound of Pierce the Veil screaming, "Red roses!" I'm not even really into "emo" music, but come on, these people are legends.
"Could you go with Michael to get some cereal? We're out."
"Why can't he go by himself?" I groan.
"I'm sorry?" she asks in a really sweet voice.
A chill runs down my spine. "Yes, ma'am."
"Great!" she cheers.
I hear the inevitable "me too"s come from the room beside mine. Naturally.
###
If this is Mom's idea of bonding... Charlie bounces up and down in the backseat, smiling up at me. I hate to say it, but my heart warms. I may have wanted to stay home, but who could say no to this little guy?
He reaches up for my arm. "Can we get cap'n crunch, and trix, and legos, and-"
"Chill your ass down. She just said cereal," Michael says from the driver's seat.
"Mom said no cursing," Megan says in her commander voice.
"Well Mom's not here right now, is she?" Michael makes eye contact with me.
I shake my head and give him a look. He's such a terrible influence. "You really shouldn't curse in front of them, Michael."
"In front of Charlie, you mean," Megan corrects when really, I meant both of them.
Michael throws his arms in the air. "What, I can't say donkey now?"
I sigh, checking one last time to make sure Charlie's properly buckled in and then I hop in the passenger's seat. Megan tells me and Michael to buckle up as though we're the ten-year-olds, and then we're off.
We head to the Walmart that's really within walking distance but honestly ain't nobody got time for that. It would easily turn this thirty-minute trip into an hour or two hour one and that's just not going to happen on my Thursday afternoon.
Michael whips the minivan into a parking, nearly taking out an old lady, and then we unload ourselves from the vehicle.
"Mia?" Charlie tugs at my arm.
I look down at him. "Yes, Charlie?"
"Doesn't the yellow light mean slow down?"
I nod. "Yes, why?"
He looks at Michael and whispers, "I don't think Michael knows. Someone needs to tell him."
"What was that?" Michael asks swooping him off the ground.
Charlie giggles like crazy but the horror never leaves my eyes. I really need to learn how to drive before Michael ends up killing us all. If Charlie notices, it's worse than I thought.
As we walk towards the entrance, I keep an eye on everyone, Megan, Michael, and Charlie who's still in Michael's arms. I'm worried one of them might end up getting lost or hurt or something on my watch. For example, as we walk into the main part of the store where there's a large amount of people, everyone is literally staring at us. Literally, everyone, and Michael doesn't even seem to notice or care.
Megan looks at me in horror. "Why are they all staring at us?" she asks.
I shrug, "I don't know. Just ignore them."
"Do you think it's because of Michael?" she asks giving him a knowing look.
When did she get so condescending? "I'm not sure," I say again. "Let's just get our cereal and go."
As Michael's swinging Charlie around, he nearly smacks him into this old man.
I speed up and snatch Charlie from Michael's arms and plant him firmly on the ground. "Hold my hand, buddy." He whines but does as told.
Michael starts whining too and I nearly smack him. His fully grown, nineteen-year-old self needs to fucking act the part. We're about to be killed in this freaking town! What is wrong with these people? I look around again and reach for Megan's hand. Normally she would argue, but today she just takes it.
I check the obvious things that might set us apart. Race is the first, clearly. We're black, so maybe they're racist or really conservative? But that doesn't make sense because this town is extremely diverse. I see a little of everything, so there's definitely no reason to suspect that. The next option is that we're new, but even then...
"Captain Crunch and Trix, right?" Michael asks grabbing them off the shelf.
"Yeah. Just hurry, please." I look around again. There's only one other family in the aisle with us. It's a woman and a man with two kids. The woman stands in front of her children protectively and the man stands in front of her. They stare at the shelves in front of them, but I can see they're still looking.
"Is it just me, or-" Michael starts to blurt out.
I give him a look to shut up.
He looks around, peaks out of the aisle, does a full scan of the area and mouths the word, fuck.