a sixteen-year-old misses the blissful days of being six
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Est. Run Time: 1:30.00
Suggested Props: a child's toys
Suggested Costuming: childish clothing, preferably bright and pink, and perhaps a pink frilly tutu
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*looks into mirror and gasps, horrified* Oh my god. Oh. My. God. Oh, no! Oh, dear. Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.
I have a problem. A big problem. A major problem. A huge problem. I'm doomed.
I am growing old.
*starts pacing* I mean, look at me! I am sixteen! Sixteen! Oh, that's so old.... Look at me. Look. At. Me. I, I can't play with dolls anymore! I can't dress up in pink frilly tutus and prance around without getting committed. And pigtails look absolutely hideous on me now! I can't sleep with a teddy bear unless I want to be called a sissy! I can't talk to my invisible friend Bob without looking like an idiot...I'm sorry, Bob.... And homework is so much harder when it's not "what is one plus two" and all that easy stuff!
*sighs* *sits down* Everything was so much easier back then. Back then, the worst your parents could do was put you in time-out, and all you had to do was scream and yell at them. But no, now you have to be all mature, and you can't put a single toe out of line, or they'll take your phone...no...not the phone.... Life was so much easier back then.
Why do I have to be sixteen? That's so old...I don't want be old. I wanna be six.
*looks down at aBarbie doll* I'm sorry, Barbie....
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I love this one to pieces. I have performed this one twice before, once at school for a monologue project (fully in costume, pink tutu and all), and once at an audition-type thing at the musical theatre intensive I attended over the summer (sadly not in costume). Suffice to say, both crowds loved it. It only gets better when you go all-out in costume, makeup, hair (I did pigtails), and props (I kidnapped one of my sister's dolls). This is a great one to audition for sulkier characters with, and a fun one that will have audiences smiling, laughing, and maybe even empathizing with you.