Nightmares were nothing he never had before, but usually they were about strange creatures chasing him. Albeit they never caught him. This nightmare however was different. It was pitched black, so it was hard to even see one's own hand right in front of one's eye. Different voices reached his ears. They were screaming in pain. What was going on? He couldn't see anything. It was hard to run away, when one did not know, what was going on or were to run to. Where was the attacker? The smell of smoke rose into his nose. Fire? Where? Panic! His heartbeat increased, tears began to stream down his face. Without a second thought he started running. All he could do, was to hope that it was the right direction. He had to find his brothers, his mother, someone. Hakuyuu and Hakuren were able to defeat the enemy! And his mother surely knew, what to do. She always knew! Hopefully, Hakuei was safe. Where was she?
The darkness slowly vanished, but what was revealed was not a pleasant sight. Seeing less would have been a blessing, dead soldiers on the ground, fire everywhere, the smell of burned flesh in the air and the screams of the dying. Now he could see that he was inside the palace, but why was it on fire? Why were they attached? Where were his brothers? At least he knew where he had to go to leave the palace, theoretically. It was questionable whether the enemy would let him escape. Probably not. But there was nothing wrong with trying to escape.
*
When he had that nightmare, he never thought that it was a dream. One could argue that it should have been obvious that he hadn't been in the real world, but the fear had blocked his mind and therewith his ability to think rationally - and he had been a small, stupid child. For his past self the dream had been real and so was the fear and the pain. Never before had he had such a realistic dream. The few nightmares before and those which came after were clearly just that, he knew it the very second his dream self saw the monsters. Not that it made the nightmares pleasant, but they were more pleasant than the realistic one. Usually it had only been his life, which was in danger, but in this dream he had thought that also his family was endangered. While his brothers had life-and-death situations on the battlefield very often, therefore they knew how to react, his sister Hakuei and his mother Gyokuen did not - just like him. The palace had many escape routes and he remembered some of them, but in his panic he had totally forgotten about them or only remembered those that were far away from his position. Maybe the same applied to his mother and sister. What if they were too far away from a secret passage to escape? To be honest, his thoughts hadn't been that specific. Of course he had thought about the whereabouts of his mother and sister, because he wanted to be saved by them and he had asked himself, what would be in case those two were dead.
Back then it had been a horrible thought, now he only gave a weary smile to this kind of thought. His mother was dead by now and his sister, he did not care about her well-being that much anymore, was still alive. It wasn't like he did not care at all anymore or wished death upon her, but back then he had feared her passing and now he would still be sad about it, but he did not fear it. An inconsistency, he cared and did not at the same time. One could compare it to losing a relative one had barely known. It was sad, yet one could live on without any problems and much sorrow. If someone had told him that one day he would feel like this about his dear older sister, he wouldn't have believed them. His sister had been his everything for so long and now she was nothing. No, this was not his fault. She was to blame, because he had done everything he could for her - all he ever wanted, was to protect her -, while she never had cared about him. A hurtful realization, but a necessary one. Better later than never. How things would have turned out, if he had known, what was ahead of him? Well, the answer to this question was irrelevant now. The past was the past and no matter how much he wanted to change it, he couldn't do so. All he could do was laughing about how he more or less had foreseen the future - the current present - in a highly bizarre way. Only a short while ago, he had realized what the dream from back then had meant. Honestly, he had forgotten about said dream and had remembered it only recently due to a mindless comment of his only friend. What a strange world they lived in. The nightmare had hunted him for many years and suddenly he needed someone to remember him of it.
In his nightmare the hallways of the palace had appeared endless. Today he could not even understand, how one could think like this. Alright, nowadays he was able to remember the secret passages and he was not under attack. The past years had been like a constant nightmare to him, so he got used to fear and panic dominating his body. Not once had he used the secret passages, but he thought about doing so more than once a day. All those years he had been surrounded by enemies, had been under attack and had been alone. It was a strange, but pleasant feeling to be finally free.
Another strange thing was the fact that he often walked down the hallways through which he had run in that dream. Never had he questioned himself, why he used those hallways without it being necessary. At the end was his late mother's bedroom. As child he often had walked there, when he needed her comfort and could not find her in the big palace, after the nightmare he did so, whenever a sudden wave of fear that she might be in danger or worse hit him. Only a few months later he thought his feet led him down there, because of his wish for revenge.
In retrospect this nightmare was so real and surreal at the same time and somewhat ironic.
*
He had never felt so happy and relieved, when he saw his brothers at the end of one of the many hallways he had run through. Both were still alive, injured but alive. Hakuren was the first to see him and immediately approached him. Hakuyuu followed his younger brother shortly after with a worried expression. The two were slightly injured, while Hakuryuu magically was unharmed, however those two had to fight against enemies, while he had only run away. Questionable whether there had ever been any need to run. Seemingly no one had been after him or else that person would have already attacked the three brothers or Hakuryuu, when he had been alone. Well, maybe a pursuer would not attack right away, since Hakuyuu was still looking out for enemies, while Hakuren took care of their younger brother. So, they were not completely defenseless or unalert. Or was there no pursuer or he had a different goal for which he needed the princes alive? One never knew and honestly, Hakuryuu didn't thought much about it and couldn't care less anyway. He had found his brothers, which meant he was save now - he was not on his own anymore. Together they could search for their mother and sister and then leave the palace!
He had clung to his brother's leg as soon as Hakuren had reached him. His crying could give their position away, but he didn't thought about that. He was just too happy and relieved to see a familiar face.
"Shhh, shhh, Hakuryuu. Everything is fine. You're save. There is no reason to cry anymore", Hakuren tried to calm down the frightened boy. With moderate success.
"We need to move on."
A statement made so calm and almost emotionless as if Hakuyuu was not in the same life-threatening situation as his siblings. Yet it was so typical for Hakuyuu. The crown prince always stayed levelheaded, even in the worst situations. Therewith he lessened the fear and panic of his followers and he himself didn't lose sight of what was going on - it reminded him of his responsibilities and he being calm was necessary to survive. Hakuren in the meantime struggled with getting Hakuryuu away from his leg and to stop crying. Who had thought that a small child could have so much power in its tiny arms - Hakuren had not.
"Please, Hakuryuu, let go of me and calm down. You are save now and we will get out of here together as soon as you let go of me. There is no reason to cry or be afraid anymore", Hakuren said, while desperately trying to make Hakuryuu loosen his grip, so he could lift the child up.
Being a big brother had never been so exhausting until now, but they also had never been attacked inside the palace and consequently Hakuryuu had never been in such great danger. The current situation must be unspeakable horrible for the youngest royal family member.
"Where are mother and Hakuei?", he asked his two older brothers, who had problems with understanding a word because of his crying and sobbing.
"I am pretty sure those two are fine and waiting for us outside. So, let's hurry up and meet them there! They are extremely worried about us, just like we are worried about them."
Hakuren felt like a genius, when he said this. Indeed Hakuryuu calmed down a bit. Of course, he was worried about his mother and sister, and his brothers were worried as well.
"We have to move onwards. Hakuryuu, stay close to Hakuren and me, we will keep you save."
Together the three brothers fought their way through the flames and their enemies - well, Hakuren and Hakuyuu fought, while Hakuryuu followed them. He knew that he was burden, since he could do nothing to help them and compared to them he was also very slow with his short legs. The smoke got thicker every passing second, thus it got harder to see something. Consequently the three princes had to be more careful, because potential attackers couldn't be spotted easily or timely. On the contrary, the enemy could not see them from afar as well and hence they could use the smoke to their advantage - unfortunately their enemies could do so as well. A double-edged sword.
After a period of time that felt like hours, like an eternity, Hakuryuu and Hakuren were at their end. Hakuren had been killed from behind and Hakuyuu, half of his body burned and covered in scars, wouldn't last any longer.
Hate, despair and wrath rose up inside of the crown prince - one could see it in his eyes. Hakuryuu was the only one, who was able to move forward and get out of this hell - if he avoided the intruders and reached a save place. Besides a burn scar on the left side of his face, he was unharmed. Hakuyuu clutched Hakuryuu at his should, therewith got the attention of his crying little brother - who wouldn't cry, when getting burned. The small child was their last hope, the only one, who had a chance of escaping, of surviving and who could avenge them.
"Hakuryuu, listen carefully. Hakuren and I are at our ends. You have to survive. You're the only one, who can get out of here. It is a shame that it has to end like this, but there is nothing I can do about it. So, listen, I will tell, who is responsible for his fire and who is after our all lives."
*
A short sentence whispered into his ears had changed Hakuryuu's whole life. Many years filled with hate and the goal of revenge followed. One rejection after the next hit him until he finally felt. He was not to blame, because he had done all he could do. Well, maybe he was at fault to a certain extent, since he was the one, who felt love for others, cared about others and wanted to be loved and accepted by those he loved. How foolish! He had rejected their play of pretend and so they were punishing him for it.
In all honesty, Hakuryuu sometimes hated his older brother for telling him the truth. How much easier could things have been for him, if he hadn't known anything? On the other hand, it was the best the way things had unfold. Just imaging that he would still love the murderer of his family, would still be a weakling and would have probably simple accepted someone on the throne, who was too unsuitable for this position, made him want to vomit. Of course, he had to learn a lot more to become a great emperor, but he was on the right way and not so blind like others. The murder of his family had opened his eyes. Seeing and accepting the truth was not always easy and in the past he often had tried to deny so many things, had tried to lull himself in illusions and act as if everything was fine. Nothing was fine, he was not fine. The world had broken him, but he had learned to just accept it. There was nothing he could do against it. Hakuyuu and Hakuren were dead and he was alive. He had taken their revenge without help - well, Judar had help, but that didn't count or so - and had taken his rightful place as emperor of Kou. Hopefully, he would now find a restful sleep at night, instead of dreaming about his brother's death. How many nights were lost to those nightmares? How often had the awoken at night, sweating, screaming, crying, because he dream about the fire incident? Too often! Way too often!
Hakuyuu's last words always echoed in his mind - at daytime and nighttime. Whenever he had taken a short rest he felt bad about it, because Hakuyuu and Hakuren had died so he could rest in peace. All they had asked for were revenge for their murder and all he did was nothing. When he killed Gyokuen he felt at ease. Finally he accomplished his task and his family could rest in peace themselves. Their souls could rest and he could do so as well.
In his dream Hakuyuu was about to tell him, who was all behind it, but Hakuryuu could not remember anymore, who it was according to his "dream brother". Probably his uncle and not his mother, because back then Hakuryuu still thought his mother was a wonderful and kind person that loved her children and would never hurt them. Funny, how much one could be wrong about another person - a person one thought to know. A bitter smile appeared on his lips. Oh, how wrong could one be! So wrong. Gyokuen was not the only one he had been wrong about. Also his "friends", how wrong he had been about them. They were no friends at all. They were his enemies and seemingly they did not mind it at all. A sad thought. For so long he had wished to finally have friends and when he thought he found some, they betrayal him - they had never cared about him in the first place, it was all just his wishful thinking. Why hadn't he already gotten a price for his foolishness? He was the master of fooling himself!
*
Screaming for his mother Hakuryuu run through the burning hallways of his home. Half of his small body was covered in blood. Hakuyuu's blood. It was supposed to keep the flames away from Hakuryuu's body, so he would not burn to death. The smoke got thicker and thicker - it hurts in his eyes and breathing got harder. He wanted to get out of here! He wanted to be with his mother! Why was all of this happening anyway? It should stop! All of this should stop! Now!
His small feet carried him towards his parent's bedroom, hoping his mother was there. Best practice would have probably been to get out of the palace, but he was too afraid on his own and the way to his parent's bedroom seemed saver, better and faster than trying to get out. Moreover, luck was on his side. No enemy attacked him on his way to his mother. Maybe a crying child was no threat or of any interest to them, which was not surprising at all. Why wasting time with killing a harmless child? Getting rid of the palace guards, soldiers and nobles was more important. On the other hand, Hakuryuu was not just any noble, he was the third prince of the Kou Empire. Well, the intruders probably did not knew this.
When he entered his mother's and late father's bedroom, darkness was all he saw. Hakuryuu wanted to turn around and search for his mother, but the hallway had disappeared. Suddenly he was surrounded by darkness again. A faint laughter reached his ears, which caused him to turn around again. With a shaking voice he let out a soft "hello". Who was there? Or had he just imaged the laughter? Maybe the wind? But what wind? There was nothing besides him and the darkness. Or was there someone else hiding in the dark? Hopefully not! The panic inside of him made it hard to breath. Tears clouded his eyes. What the hell was going on here? He wanted to leave! Wanted to get out of here! Wanted to be hold by his mother! Where was she? He was alone and afraid and hurt and his brothers were dead and he was not. This was horrible, so terrifying, painful, unfair and cruel. Why did this happen to him? Why was it happening to his family? Hakuyuu and Hakuren only wanted to bring peace to the world, so why did people want them dead? Wasn't everyone aiming for peace? Didn't everyone wanted to live in peace?
Sobbing and whimpering for his mother, Hakuryuu got on his knees, wishing that everything was just a nightmare - it should have been obvious that this was a nightmare, but during the dream he hadn't realized it.
Another laughter made him wince. Someone was there! But who? An enemy? An ally? Obviously it wasn't his mother! The laughter was too deep to belong to her. Hakuryuu tried another soft "hello". He was unsure of what reaction he wanted from the unknown person, who hid in the darkness, but he hoped for the best. With his arms he wiped away the tears, so he could see better in the dark. A small spot of light was there in the middle of nowhere. The laughter was coming from there. Also there was the silhouette of a person, at least it seemed to be a person. Something was strange about the unknown person, but Hakuryuu could not point at what was wrong, which was probably due to him being not close enough to the other one. This was solved easily by getting closer to said person. Hakuryuu's steps were unsteady, since he was still afraid of all those strange and terrifying happenings. Nothing surprising at all. However, he soon regretted his decision.
The person was not a person at all! It was a creature all in black. Describing it was hard for Hakuryuu, because the creature had a human shape, yet it wasn't one - long, spiky ears, black hair, which resembled feathers more than hair and black scales covering its skin. Never before had he seen such a creature.
Further it seemed like the creature was not alone. There was someone in its arms. The unknown thing was sitting on the ground and holding someone. By taking a closer look Hakuryuu recognized who it was! Those colors, that fabric, those clothes belonged to his mother! There was absolutely no mistake! This creature had done something to his mother! Despite being a child he was not stupid. He knew what had happened. That monster had murdered his mother! Just because there was no blood did not mean that nothing had happened. It was probably too dark to see the blood. And if his mother were not dead then why was she not moving and why was that monster laughing?
*
The very second that monster had turned around and showed his face, Hakuryuu had woken up. He had cried and jumped out of his bed to find his family. Back then he totally had freaked out and when he wasn't able to immediately find his family, cried even more. Some servant had tried to calm him down, but all he had done was fighting them off, because to him they were intruders and only wanted to harm him. Only after his mother hold him in her arms and tenderly stroked over his back, while whispering in his ears that everyone and everything was fine, that he had just a bad dream and that also Hakuyuu, Hakuren and Hakuei were still alive as well as their father, who was just still in a meeting, he had calmed down. It was disgusting to think about, how his mother acted so kind and caring, while being fully aware that this dream was not just that, but something she already had planned or was planning at the moment. She probably had laughed about him behind his back. Well, it did not matter anymore. The witch was dead and would never ever do any harm to him or those dear to him.
And wasn't it ironic that the monster he had hated and feared for so many years, was himself? He himself was the murderer of his oh so beloved mother. That nightmare had not been a simple dream, but a vision of his own future. It was so painful to realize this now. If he had known this sooner, Hakuyuu and Hakuren may still be alive, while his mother had been killed sooner as well and hadn't brought so much pain and terror over the world. The Kou Empire would be in the right hands - ruled by Hakuyuu.
However, one could not change what had happened and there was no reason to linger in the past any longer. He had fulfilled his duty, so his brothers could finally rest in peace and he would make sure that from now on the Kou Empire was walking towards a bright future in a world without war. Hakuryuu was aware that he had to do a lot of work to accomplish that, since the people of the empire loved war too much, but he had done so many thing that were considered impossible, especially impossible for him. He wasn't that useless weakling anymore. He was Ren Hakuryuu, the fourth emperor of the Kou Empire!