For the first time in a week, I didn't wake up to the obnoxious ringing of Matteo's alarm. Instead, the barely noticeable tickle of hair being moved away from my face by light fingertips caused me to stir. The sparks dancing across my skin let me know who it was immediately, not that I really needed them. It hadn't even been a thought in my mind to sleep with anyone other than Matteo lately.
"Admiring your work," I stated, already knowing the answer. I could feel the cool air hit my neck where he had made sure to place his mark.
Marking happened quite often between mates. It was more of an Alpha thing to place their mark in a more obvious place, though. Hence why most Alpha mates bare their marks on the base of their necks.
More often than not, average wolves would mark their mates in less apparent places. Marks were not only territorial, but extremely sensual, as well. For a she-wolf, it wasn't something to just parade around, but for an alpha's mate, it was a mark of high rank. The mark doesn't possess any magical qualities that keep other guys away, but it does show how strong the wolf is that you'll be fighting with over said mate. A male wolf's canines are one of his most valued traits. The bigger the canines, the bigger the bite. This is based on how deep in color the scar of the mark is.
"I'm sorry," he apologized which confused me and took me back about seven steps. Since when does Matteo Nerezza apologize? I slowly opened my eyes to see Matteo looking at the mark with a pained expression.
"You're sorry?" I repeated, trying to get his attention. I also needed confirmation that he did indeed say 'sorry', and I wasn't just losing my mind. "Matteo," I snapped softly when he wouldn't answer me. His eyes shifted from the mark to my eyes.
"Don't make me say it again," he demanded, but it came out more of a plea than a command.
"If I didn't want it, it wouldn't be there," I countered. Contrary to what he may think, I knew what I was doing when I let him mark me. I didn't just let him take advantage of me.
He didn't answer. His eyes just focused back on the mark.
"Do you regret it?" I asked seeing the way he looked at my neck.
"Do I regret marking you?" He repeated me looking back into my eyes. I didn't say anything. The look on my face was answer enough for him. "No, Kaia," he continued, "but do regret how I did it? Yeah, I do."
"We always argue. Don't worry about it. It's how we get along," I tried to reason with him to make him feel a little less guilty. In all honesty, I wasn't the fondest of him marking me in the middle of an argument, but that's just how we are.
"I should have never acted on emotion like that," he argued making me irritated.
"You lost control of your emotions. It happens to everyone. It's okay to be scared." Well, that seemed to really get his attention.
"I was not scared." The look in Matteo's eyes switched from apologetic to serious in seconds. Obviously, I hurt his masculinity a bit with that truth.
"Matteo, you were obviously scared. It's okay—"
"Kaia, I was not scared."
"Yes, you were."
"No, I was not."
"Why are you denying it? There's nothing wrong with being afraid."
"I wasn't afraid of anything!"
"Fine," I snapped pulling away from his grasp, "I'll just leave you then—"
"No!" Matteo shot out quickly as his arms wound back around me. A look of panic washed over his face just proving my point that he was obviously terrified of me leaving. I shot him a pointed look. The panic in his face was immediately replaced by a stoic expression.
"Not scared, huh?" I asked, once again.
"I'm protective," he said, trying to defend his actions.
"Yeah, because everyone panics and looks like they're about to cry when they get protective," I mocked, unconvinced by his excuse.
"I don't cry."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't do a lot of things," I muttered, rolling away from him to end the conversation. I didn't get too far, though. His strong hands caught a hold of my shoulders, spun me back around, and—as I was in the midst of a protest—his hand came up to the back of my head while his lips captured mine.
It wasn't a hungry, lust-filled kiss as it had been the night before. Instead, it was pretty emotional. Something that would have normally made me uncomfortable, but it actually managed to make me feel pretty at ease. It was as if Matteo was trying to tell me all the things he couldn't bring himself to actually say through the kiss.
We pulled away slowly. Truth be told, I really wasn't the happiest that it ended. I don't think Matteo knew what to say. I didn't really either. We just laid there searching each other's eyes for something—anything. An emotion, a tear, anything.
'You have me. You'll always have me,' is what I wanted to say. I couldn't will myself to actually say that, though. Always wasn't a word I enjoyed using.
"Don't apologize for something that I wanted just as much as you did," I advised. I was expecting—well, hoping—for a smile or something that showed me he didn't still feel guilty about something I wanted. Instead, his lips met mine again, and I melted.
Not the response I wanted, but I wasn't going to complain.
He pulled away and rested our foreheads against one another. The hand that had been holding the back of my head was now caressing my cheek causing an eruption of warmth to spread over my face.
"You deserve better," Matteo admitted lowly, making my stomach drop.
He wouldn't be saying that if he knew who I really was—what kind of murderous monster I really am.
Well, I guess that makes two of us.
"I really don't," I mumbled before crawling out of the bed, leaving Matteo alone, and wandering into the bathroom to get ready for our departure from Manitoba.
I didn't have much to actually do. Shower, pee, brush my teeth, search for my deodorant for ten minutes, put on the deodorant, put on some comfortable clothes which consisted of underwear, a sports bra, socks, a pair of black leggings, and one of Matteo's sweatshirts, and then pack up what I hadn't of our belongings.
In that time, I had the opportunity to witness the damage that Matteo had caused to my neck.
Trust me when I say, Matteo's mark wasn't going to be able to be hidden by any amount of foundation.
It was obvious based on the deep coloration of the scar where Matteo's four canines had bitten into my skin along with the rest of his teeth. I thought that it might fade over few minutes, but if anything I think it may have gotten darker.
Barron would be just flat out brainless to try to test Matteo and I's mate bond again after seeing this. Not to mention, Matteo will no doubt be way more territorial of what he deems as his which just happens to be me now that I bare his mark.
I tried my hardest to show Matteo that I was really okay with him marking me. As the morning went on, he acted less apologetic about it and grew more cocky. It was a characteristic of Matteo that I hadn't really had the opportunity to witness.
Prideful, yes. Cocky, not much.
It wasn't a 'seventeen-year old boy who just got his first lay and was keen on everyone knowing' kind of cocky, though. It was more of a 'she's mine, and everyone is going to know it now' kind of cocky.
As Matteo paraded me around the lobby of the hotel amidst our farewells to everyone, he made sure at least a small bit of the mark was peeking out from his sweatshirt that I had on.
He had a lot of fun showing me off as if I were the best prize in the world. On the outside, he seemed as composed as ever, but I could tell by the glint in his eye that he shot me every once in a while that he was having the time of his life on the inside.
This changed when it was time to say goodbye to Barron.
The conversation was brief. Barron asked if I wanted him to mark me, too. I declined. Matteo almost ripped his head off, so I had to push him back and calm him down. As Matteo and I began walking away, Barron hollered "Can't I get an 'I love you'?" to which I simply replied with a 'f--k you'. His answer? 'Alright. If you insist.' That one sent Matteo over the edge. A kind-hearted mate would have probably stopped Matteo from punching Barron dead center in the face, but I guess that's why Matteo and I are good for each other.
Neither Matteo nor I wanted a repeat of the vomit-palooza we had to deal with a week prior. So, Matteo snuck his way into the system and was able to come up with some documents for me to be able to get a passport and fly home. I didn't ask how he managed to do it. I just thanked my guardian angel for giving me such good luck lately. She must have been really working her ass off to get me in someone's good books.
Dani took one for the team and drove Matteo's car home. She left the night before Matteo and I were set to, so she could meet us at the airport when we got home. From there, we would switch off cars since hers was still parked in the parking garage from her flight up to Manitoba.
God bless airplanes and fake passports.
I only got sick about nine times rather than the hundreds of times I had to go through thanks to Matteo's stupid car.
To say that Daniella was surprised to see the mark on my neck when we greeted her at the airport would be an understatement. I thought she was about to lose her shit.
After about twenty minutes of interrogation, Matteo finally separated us long enough for us to get into his car and head home.
If I thought Dani's reaction was bad, I was not ready for Jack's.
Matteo and I entered the house with his arm securely around my waist. A few men carried our bags from the car behind us. Jack met us at the door with a calm expression.
"Alpha," he bowed his head to Matteo.
"Jack," Matteo acknowledged making me roll my eyes. He was so formal and stoic when his pack was around. I wonder what they would all think if they saw their Alpha joking around with his mate about being a 'classy porn star'. I bet they would lose their minds, keel over, and die.
"Beta Kade of Socius called this morning. It sounded urgent. I alerted him that you would be arriving today," Jack explained being just as serious as Matteo. It was weird.
My ears perked up at the mention of my brother. I hadn't had the opportunity to say goodbye to him this morning. Apparently, he and Bryce left late last night when they were alerted by their pack that their presence was needed. It had something to do with the rogue that had kept them from arriving to the Conference to begin with. Apparently, the rogue problem that they believed they had sorted out really wasn't fixed at all.
"Is he okay?" I asked, becoming worried for my brother.
"He didn't specify his reason for calling. He just said he needed to speak with you," Jack said, directing his statement at Matteo. He nodded sharply before turning his attention to me.
"I will be right back," Matteo promised. "Jack, get some food and water in her system. She's had a long morning," he ordered before leaving Jack and I.
As soon as Matteo was out of hearing range, Jack's serious façade morphed into the Joker real quick.
"When did this happen?" He practically screamed at me as he pulled the sweatshirt down to expose the mark. I was about to ask him how he knew considering I made sure it was covered when Matteo and I came into the house, but his excited babble told me all I needed to know. "I didn't get a call from you or my dick of a best friend. I had to get a call from Dani which I'm highly offended that she found out from you before I did."
"Listen, it was a spur of the moment thing. It only happened last night," I explained as I chuckled lightly.
"I knew it was going to happen!" He shouted excitedly like a seven year old who just won at a crane game. "You guys actually do have hearts!"
"Jack, seriously, it not that important," I said trying to push away the conversation and began heading toward the kitchen.
"Not that important?" Jack repeated as he followed me into the kitchen. "Kaia, this is one of the most important things that can happen to a pack. This is huge!"
"Mhm, because a little rogue being marked is so important to this pack," I muttered grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.
"It's important when that mark just so happens to come from our Alpha," he countered.
"It's not like we finished it," I stated trying to seem put together. In reality, the more we talked about it, the more I felt like throwing up, again.
"Kaia, you say that like most people don't bang before the marking," he pointed out. My lips settled into a thin line as I thought about it. He wasn't wrong. Often times, marking did come after sex. "You already finished the hard part. Anyone can have sex. Marking is what really makes you Matteo's."
"Jack, I—" I began trying to argue with him, but I was cut off by a pack member. I sent up a silent thank you to the man upstairs.
"Sorry for the interruption Beta and—uh—" he stuttered. I could tell the poor boy was first of all intimidated by standing next to two very influential pack members. Not only that, but I could tell that he was really struggling with what to call me. I knew he could see at least a part of the mark.
"What is it?" I asked with a small smile. This alone seemed to have calmed his nerves a bit.
"The Alpha has requested for you in his office," he said with his head low, not daring to look me in the eyes. Again, I sent up a silent thanks and ran out of the kitchen at lightning speed.
I arrived at Matteo's office in no time. The door was closed. I decided to be nice and actually knock for once. I waited for Matteo's 'come in' before entering.
"You requested?" I asked peering into his office. He was standing in front of his desk with the phone to his ear.
"It's for you," he answered as he moved the phone from his head and held it out to me. I was confused at first, but then I remembered that he was supposed to be calling my brother back. It was probably just Aleksei calling to say hello.
I bounced over to the phone and happily snatched it from Matteo's hand.
"Hello?" I asked into the phone.
"Kaia?" Aleksei's panicked voice rang over the phone causing my entire body to stiffen.
"Kaden?" I asked, worry filling my tone. I immediately reverted back to his real name feeling like the little girl that I used to be when he was around.
I had been doing so well using the name he wanted to be called after he had succumbed to pack-life. I just couldn't help myself.
"He's here, Kaia," he said swiftly leaving me in a state of confusion.
"Who's there?"
"Parker. He's in the cells," Aleksei confirmed making me freeze. My hand released the phone allowing it to topple to the floor. Matteo was holding onto my shoulders in a matter of seconds. His dark eyes were peering into my own searching for any answers as to what just happened.
"Kai, what's wrong?" He interrogated suddenly on high alert.
"They—they have him," I whispered. A cold shiver ran down my back at the actual thought of it. It couldn't be true.
"Who?"
I gulped. There was no way. Not now. Not like this. Not when everything just finally started to figure itself out. I just started to find myself.
"Kai, who do they have?" Matteo repeated himself as he shook me a bit. My blood ran cold, but my heart felt warm.
Someone who I had loved so much, but had caused me so much pain. Someone who had created my childhood, but also managed to destroy it. Someone who I had missed more than anything, but never wanted to return. Someone who built me up to the person I am, but ruined me from the start.
"My dad."
______________________
IM HORRID.
IM OK. IM ALIVE. IVE JUST BEEN SO BUSY AND IM SO SO SORRY.
AH
MY APOLOGIES 10/9/17