Liam had returned from tour at the beginning of February, with Darren and I moving into the house a few weeks after that.
Darren had turned nine months a week ago, and since returning from tour, Liam had been a very hands on dad.
We were the family that I always dreamed of being.
I started work on my third album this week, after talking it over with Liam. All I wanted to do was spend my time being a mother, but Liam had noticed how much I missed music. I wouldn't be touring anytime soon.
In fact, I don't know if I want to tour again for some time. At this point, I'd only really consider doing residencies again, since they were much easier on my mental health.
"Bex, Jensen, and Ryland were in the studio the other day, and we got the instrumentals for That Pain and Heart Like That, so that is ready for you"
I had been working with a new producer, Thurston Davis. He had helped Colton work on a new EP, and would be helping me with my new album.
He reminded me a lot of Kurt.
"I'm really excited about this" I smiled "I have missed this place, but not as much as I miss my son right now"
He chuckled "How is being a mom?"
"It's great. I was worried that being a mom would be overwhelming, but I'm lucky enough to have such amazing support. That support is the only reason why I'm even somewhat fine going back to work; but I miss him so much"
"You should bring him to the studio sometime" he sat back "So what did you want to discuss?"
I pulled my new songbook from my bag "This book has everything for this album"
"Everything?" he asked, taking it and looking through it.
"There are twenty songs in that book. Fourteen of them will be on the album, the rest for a deluxe edition or whatever. I have them listed in a specific order, and I ideas for each song"
He raised his eyebrow "You put a lot of thought into this"
"This will be the most important album that I put out"
"Why is that?"
I took a deep breath "I don't know when I'm going to record another one; my contract has me down for three albums. I'm not saying I'll never record again, but I've been trying to make some decisions about my life, and depending on how things are when it comes time to finishing this; there are two options for what to do after it's released"
He nodded "I see; have you talked to Simon?"
"Yes; he wants this album to be the best it can be"
"Then let's make the greatest album of your career" he smiled.
There was a knock on the door. Thurston and I both looked over to see Liam, with Darren in one of his chest carriers.
I couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
Thurston laughed as well "Well that's certainly a sight"
I walked up to them and smiled, while Darren was reaching for me.
"Did someone miss me?" I asked, taking Darren out and holding him.
"Honestly, he started crying as soon as you left. Even Robert Smith couldn't help him calm down; he just missed you so much" Liam said, not bothering to take the carrier off "I was on my way to go see Niall and Louis, but I thought we'd stop by first and see you"
I kissed the top of Darren's head "I'm so glad you did; I missed my boys"
Thurston stood up and extended his hand to Liam "I'm Thurston Davis"
Liam shook his hand "Colton couldn't stop raving about how great of a producer you are; I'm really glad you're helping Gracie with her masterpiece album"
"When I heard that Gracie was thinking of working on a third album, I immediately went to Simon. I wanted to work on this album, especially after seeing her perform live"
"You were at one of the shows?"
He nodded "Yeah, I think it was the first one that Niall played the guitar. I heard her perform her song Thank You For Breaking My Heart, and I knew that whatever she worked on next was going to be big"
"No pressure there" I laughed, looking at Liam "What do you and the boys have planned?"
"Just hanging around at Niall's, maybe play some video games; I swear they want to see Darren more than me, so I'm just the chauffeur"
I smiled "I don't blame them for wanting to see him"
"Well we're going to record a song and work on some vocals today, then I'm all set to come home" I looked at Thurston "Right?"
He nodded "Yeah"
"I won't be at Niall's for too long, so hopefully I get back around the same time"
"You don't have to rush" I smiled "I know you miss them, and Darren is always so happy when he sees Louis"
Liam picked up Darren's baby bag "Okay" he kissed me softly before putting Darren back in the carrier "Say goodbye to mummy" he took Darren's hand and waved at me.
"Bye, baby" I smiled "You two have fun"
After they left, Thurston looked at me "What song do you want to work on?"
"That Pain"
He nodded "Let's get going then"
I got in the recording booth and took a deep breath. This was my first time recording for this album, and it was exciting.
"You ready?" Thurston asked over the microphone.
I nodded "Let's do it"
(Play Video)
Following through
Through all the people I am thinking of you
Riding the waves
And all the fancy silk I'm slipping away
Through and through
My heart
My heart
Knows me better than I know myself
Washing words clean from my mouth
That pain
That pain
Suddenly has left my brain
Raining color candy cane
So what's the point in wishing you're done?
Where does everyone have to go this time
Why we always walking the line?
Chains, stones to the ground
Nothing's there to hold you down
Whatever we do
Who we someday become
We already are that now
And if it's a dream
Stop it from waking me
My heart
My heart
Knows me better than I know myself
Washing words clean from my mouth
That pain
That pain
Suddenly has left my brain
Raining color candy cane
So what's the point in wishing you're done?
Where does everyone have to go this time?
Why we always walking the line?
Chains stones to the ground
Nothing's there to hold you down
Way out find your way out
It's the only light I'll see [x2]
My heart
My heart
Knows me better than I know myself
Washing words clean from my mouth
So what's the point in wishing you're done?
Where does everyone have to go this time?
Why we always walking the line?
Chains stones to the ground
Nothing's there to hold you down
Thurston started clapping, making me laugh "Gracie, we're going to strike gold with this album"
"You think so?"
"Absolutely"
I smiled and started thinking about everything that would come with this album, and how if I had to leave something of my career behind it would be this album.
"You think you got another take in you?"
"I have several" I smiled.
He nodded "Let's get to it then"