Isabella
"Gina?" I repeated. The line was silent for a few seconds before the call disconnected completely. I pulled my phone away from my ear and frowned. "What the hell?" I mumbled to myself. Like.... what just happened?
I dropped my phone in my lap and stared off at the wall for a minute. I was trying to get my head straight because I was hella confused. For one, why was Gina even calling me in the first place– and two, why did she bother taking the time to call me if she didn't plan on talking? Like I know I'm tired, trust me I am, but I'm pretty sure I didn't just imagine that happening. It happened, I just don't understand why.
Gina's always been about games, so I have every reason to believe this is just another one of them. But what could she possibly want from me at this point? She'll be in prison for years, it's not like we'll be rekindling our relationship anytime soon. Is that what she even wants though? Or she plotting for some sort of revenge? Eh...
Maybe I'm just paranoid. I could be looking too deep into this, but then again, Gina's put me through some shit. It's hard to just play things off because I can never be too careful / observant, especially after everything that's happened over the past few years.
But honestly who knows. It could go either way really. The chaos my life has become over the past few days is messing with my head like crazy– if it wasn't already obvious.
I groaned and tossed my phone aside before laying back down. I could waste time to over-analyzing the situation all evening, or I could brush this off for a few hours and get my nap in. Considering I haven't slept in about a day, I think the nap is my best bet. If Gina's back on her bullshit she's just gonna have to wait until later to get dealt with. I'm too tired right now.
"Good night." I mumbled to myself. And then I was out.
\\\
{A few hours later }
"Bella, baby, wake up."
I slowly forced my eyes open and blinked a few times before focusing on my mom. Wait, when did she get here? What time is it? Am I dead?
"Mom?" I finally mumbled. I tried wiping some of the sleep out of my eyes before sitting up. I don't know how long I slept, but it felt like days. I guess that's what happens when you're sleep deprived.
"Hey." My mom smiled and wiped something off my face. I frowned but let her do it anyways cause I didn't want to be looking crazy. "Sleep good?"
I nodded. "Yeah, for once. What are you doing here?"
"I'm picking y'all up. We're going somewhere." She said. I raised my brow.
"Like, going somewhere in the city or taking another trip?" I asked. I always have to clarify because you never know with the Knowles-Carter's.
"Not so much a vacation, but it will be a trip. We're going to Houston to get your sister." My mom said. I opened my mouth to say something but she cut me off. "Don't start with me. You can be upset with her if you want, fine, but I'm not leaving her down there. I don't want her away from me, especially right now. I want all of my babies in one place, with me. You two need to sit down and talk about this, because if I can forgive her, you can too. We don't need anymore fighting going on, I want you both to work this out."
I sighed. Yeah I wanted to argue, but it was pointless. And remember what I said about not stressing my mom out? I'm trying to hold myself to that.
"Fine." I reluctantly agreed.
My mom smiled. "Thank you." She kissed my forehead before standing up. "Go ahead and get your stuff together. I'm going downstairs to talk with Kelly for a minute, so I'll give you some time to wake up."
"Wait!" I said when she started walking out. She turned around and I motioned for her to come back. She did. "Is Jeremiah okay?" I asked.
My mom's face changed. That must not be a good sign. "He's doing better. When he first woke up he didn't remember much, but he fell back asleep before I left and I'm scared he will when he wakes back up."
"You don't want him to remember anything?" I frowned.
"I don't want him to resent your father." She said softly. My frown deepened and I shook my head.
"Mommy, you can't lie to him about that. Even if he didn't remember, you have to be honest when it comes to something like that. Because I know what happened, and I'm not lying." I told her. "It's not fair to ask me to either. I don't know how I feel about dad right now, I'm kinda glad he hasn't contacted me, but still–"
"Wait, what do you mean he hasn't contacted you?" My mom said, interrupting me. I was gonna say something about her cutting me off but she looked pissed so I decided to let that go. "Jay hasn't called you since he left?"
"No." I said.
Speaking of calls, I remembered the thing with Gina but decided not to bring it up. My mom's already stressed and the last thing I'm trying to do is push her over the edge, especially since my dad is nowhere to be found. I'm not trying to be an orphan okay.
"Okay." Was all my mom said. I'm glad that anger isn't directed towards me or I'd be shaking in my boots right now. I can tell she's like, furious, but she's hiding it well.
"Okay." I said. My mom sat down next to me and looked at me for a minute.
"Bella, are you okay?" She asked. I frowned.
"Yeah, why?" I replied. She shook her head and sighed.
"No. With everything that has happened between me and your father, are you okay?" My mom repeated.
I was about to say yes again, but stopped myself to really think about what she was asking. Was I okay? I know I haven't been sleeping, I've been feeling more anxious lately and I've had this sick feeling in my stomach that hasn't gone away yet. I saw my dad put his hands on my mom, then my brother, before disappearing.
"I don't know." I answered honestly. The little recap I had made me tear up a little, but I didn't feel like crying. It requires so much energy, and I barely had enough to function normally right now. "It's a lot."
Of course, much to my dismay, I started crying. I'm an emotional person and I've been holding all this in, which is a very, very bad thing for someone like me. If I don't cry when I need to it builds up until I physically can't hold it in anymore.
And now we're here.
"Baby, come here." My mom said. I continued to cry pathetically as she pulled me into her arms and let me cry it out into her shirt. "I'm sorry this happened, and I'm so sorry you had to see it. That was the last thing I wanted. I've tried so hard to keep you five out of our arguments, whether it was something serious or not, I didn't want you hearing it."
"I don't know how to feel right now." I said sniffling. My mom kissed my cheek and rubbed my back.
"It's okay. Don't worry about it, just relax right now. Breathe baby." She told me. I laid my head back on her shoulder and did what she said.
We sat in silence for a few minutes, the only noise being my sniffles and my mom's humming. She would always either hum or sing to us when we were upset, and it really did help. It's so relaxing, and her voice is so pretty, it makes me calm.
I'm thankful for her. More than anyone else, including my dad.
"Has he ever hit you?" I asked quietly. It was a recurring thought I've been having lately, and at first I didn't want to know the answer. But curiosity got the best of me and I decided I needed to know.
My mom sighed and I tilted my head to look up at her.
"No, baby. He's never put his hands on me, and he's only pushed me once before that. I promise." My mom said softly. "Don't hate your father, Isabella. I don't want what happened between us to determine how you feel about him. He's not a bad man, and I do love him. We're just going through some things right now."
Like what, divorce?
"He knocked Jeremiah unconscious mom. That isn't something I can just forget about." I said frowning. "And as much as I'd like to pretend him pushing you didn't bother me, it does. It does a lot. Because there's no excuse for that, and I don't know why you're trying to make them for him. He's not even here to defend himself because he ran away like a coward."
"Bella." My mom said. I just shrugged and shook my head. I meant everything I said, I don't regret it. "Just, try to work on forgiving him right now. Okay? Please. For me."
"We'll see." I said. She just sighed and nodded.
"Get your things together so we can leave. I'll be downstairs with your auntie and sisters." My mom said.
"Okay."
I got up and started making my way towards the bathroom but my mom stopped me.
"I love you, Isabella." She said softly. She sounded kind of sad too, which is understandable. "I just want you to be happy. All of you. I'm trying to fix this, I promise."
I sighed a little. I don't know how she planned to do that, but I'll let her believe it's possible.
"I love you too mommy. Thank you."
My mom smiled and nodded before she left out. I grabbed what I needed and headed to the bathroom like I had originally planned.
*****
Blue
"Ooh woo, I'm a rebel just for kicks, now
I been feeling it since 1966, now
Might be over now, but I feel it still"
I sang along to the radio while I was in the process of making myself a turkey sandwich. It was around five and I was feeling a little hungry, so I decided to Master Chef Junior it up and whip a little something together. My grandma flew back to LA a couple nights ago and my cousin probably wouldn't be home until later, so this would most likely be my dinner. I gotta savor it.
I finished making my sandwich and grabbed a water from the fridge before sitting at the island. I reached for my phone without thinking about it and cried a little when I remembered I didn't have it. That bad boy was all the way back in LA. I wonder how she's doing.
Now to be dramatic or anything but I really missed my phone. Not having it made everything so much more boring, but I was managing. It's not like I have a ton of friends down here to occupy my time, so really my days are just slow and boring. Houston is a big city and there's a lot of stuff to do, but when you can't drive and you're grounded it's not such a good time.
Speaking of being grounded, I cannot wait until this nightmare is over. Yes I deserve it, trust me I know, but that doesn't mean I'm not counting down the days until I can get the heck up out of here. I love my family and all that, Texas is nice, but I'm ready to go home. I miss my parents and even my siblings, and I didn't think I'd ever say that. That's when you know. It's only been a couple weeks but it feels so much longer.
I was going in for another bite of my sandwich when the doorbell started ringing. I chose to ignore it for a few seconds but whoever was outside was not giving in. I rolled my eyes and reluctantly abandoned my lunch to go see who was at the door, and rudely interrupting my meal time.
I peeked through the curtains in the hallway and almost peed myself when I saw who it was. I slid down the hall in my socks and quickly opened the door.
"Daddy!" I said smiling. My dad chuckled and caught me when I basically jumped on him. "What are you doing here? I thought you weren't coming for another two weeks."
"I decided to come early. I missed my baby girl." He said. He closed the door behind him and we walked back to the kitchen. "You eating lunch?" He asked, looking at my sandwich.
"Yeah, I was. I just made it." I said. I wasn't really that hungry anymore though. "How long are you staying?" I asked. That's what I was really wondering.
My dad just shrugged. "I didn't plan on staying long." He said.
I quickly frowned. "Oh."
He looked at me and laughed. "Don't get mad, you didn't let me finish. I'm not staying because you're coming with me."
Oh?
"I am?" My dad nodded and I raised my brow. "Okay... are we going home?"
"No. It's a surprise though." He said. I kept frowning because I was still confused. Am I not grounded? What are we taking trips for?
Then again, when have I ever been one to pass up a trip somewhere? I'm all for having a good time, even if it's super random and out of the blue. Honestly I haven't talked to my dad since last week, but I'm happy to see him. I just wish my mom was here too because I really miss her. Speaking of....
"Is mommy meeting us there?" I asked him. I was assuming she was, since that's usually what happens, but I wanted to ask anyways.
"She might, I don't know yet. Why, you don't want to go somewhere with just me? You gonna do me like that?" My dad asked. I laughed a little and shook my head. "Damn, I see how it is."
"No dad, I was just asking." I said smiling. "I just miss mommy. If she doesn't come, can I use your phone to call her? I haven't talked to her in a couple days."
My dad nodded. "You can call her when we land, aight? Just remind me."
"Okay." I nodded. "Do I need to go pack my stuff up?"
"Yeah, quickly though. We need to leave in the next thirty minutes." My dad said.
"Okay! Be right back."
I hopped up and jogged upstairs to the guest room. I grabbed my suitcase and tried to get my stuff together as fast as possible. Thankfully I didn't have too much and it only took me about fifteen minutes before I was all set.
"Dad! Can you help me carry this!" I yelled from the top of the staircase. My dad came around the corner a few seconds later and helped me get my bags down. "Thanks." I smiled.
He kissed my forehead. "No problem. You got everything?"
I looked around before nodding. "Yeah, I think so. All I really had was clothes and a few books, so I think I have everything." I said.
"Alright, come on."
I followed my dad outside and used my spare key to lock the door before walking to the car. The driver put my bags in the trunk while I climbed in the back seat. I was so excited to get outta here, y'all have no idea. I still wasn't sure if I was grounded or not but I didn't even care at the moment, I was just happy to be going somewhere.
"Can I call mommy now?" I asked my dad. He was doing something on his phone and it made me remember I wanted to talk to her.
"When we land, Blue. I need to answer these emails right now." My dad said. I frowned but didn't argue with him. I don't see why... you know what, never mind. Let me just be thankful I'm with one of my parents.
It took us about forty-five minutes to get to the clear port because of traffic. I almost took a nap on the way, but I decided to save my sleep for the plane. I didn't know where we were going and long flights make me sick.
"Oh yes." I said when I saw the snack table full of sweets. Usually the food we have on our plane is stuff my parents eat and I'm not really too fond of, so I'm happy that this is stuff I'll actually enjoy.
"Get what you want." My dad said. I looked back at him with my brows raised.
"Seriously?" I asked. Why was he letting me wild out? I swear I thought I was still in some deep trouble not even two hours ago.
"Yeah, go ahead." My dad nodded. He went and sat down in one of the seats while I made my plate. There were chocolate covered strawberries, brownies, chocolate covered pretzels and mini cupcakes– you know I loaded up.
"So, have I missed anything big while I was gone?" I asked once I was sitting down. I started munching on my snacks while my dad finished sending an email.
"You haven't missed much." He said a few minutes later. I nodded and took another bite of my brownie. "Everyone's doing good. You'll see them in a few days."
"A few days?" I repeated. "So it's just us going on this trip?"
"Yeah, is that okay with you?" My dad chuckled. I shrugged and nodded.
"Yeah I don't care, I just thought it was like a family thing, since usually we all go together." I said.
"Nah, just us this time."
"Oh okay." I nodded. I got comfortable in my seat and looked out the window.
I can't help but wonder where we're going. Hopefully the flight won't be too long, but I guess we'll see.
*****
Author's Note:
omg an update??? how crazy & so unlike me, I know.. >>
if you couldn't tell I never have time to write anymore so I just update whenever I can / when I have the motivation to. I know I suck im sorry lmao but like, it's either this or I just delete all my stuff & leave it alone, so I'm gonna stick with this method right now because I don't wanna do that yet. So just bare with me for now :)